Tears fall down my face, and I raise my head, letting out one deep breath before doing the most unselfish thing I have ever done in my life. But I wouldn’t have it any other way. I’m sacrificing myself for those I love. I love my family, and I couldn’t live with myself if something happened to them and I could have prevented it.
My heart breaks as I look at Wilder, who looks shocked. “Baby, no.” He shakes his head. “Don’t do this to me.” He whispers that part.
“I love you, so much,” I whisper back.
“I will not let you do this!”
“I have to, my love.” I turn away, every part of me breaking. I look to the leader, my shoulders back, face forward. “I will go.”
“No!” Wilder roars again, and I hear scrambling. I turn around to see Travis and Tristan holding him back. He looks at them with pure hatred. “I will never forgive you for this, you just ended my world.”
“Joslyn, please,” he begs.
“Let’s go, Darlin’.” The leader grabs my arm, pulling me along. I hear Wilder’s scream before everything goes black.
19
Wilder
I stand frozen, watching my life leaving with those who are trying to kill us. I have never felt such pain, but I know why she did it, and it’s killing me. But that isn’t the worst part. The worst part is not knowing what is happening to her.
Travis touches my shoulder, and I whip around and punch him as hard as I fucking can. I will never forgive him for this.
“Her ring has a tracker,” Tristan informs me.
That is when I hear the roar of motorcycles, way too fucking late. We run toward the bikes. We have to get to her.
We run directly into the road, in front of the bikes. They skid to a stop. Walker is the first one off of his bike, and he looks around for Joslyn.
My Joslyn.
“Where is she?”
I shake my head, not able to say what the fuck happened.
“They have her,” Travis says, and my anger comes full force again.
God knows what is happening to her or what will happen. Joslyn is innocent and so sweet. It would kill me to see some of that sweetness diminish, or her light.
“Let’s just get her.”
One by one, they look at me and I walk to the truck, which is parked behind the bikes. Travis and Tristan get in the truck behind me, and Caleb is in the driver’s seat. “I am tracking her ring, they are still driving,” he says.
I just nod. I don’t want to talk. I just want to get her back—and when I do, every single one of those fuckers is dead.
Joslyn
An hour later, we pull to a stop outside an old run-down warehouse. We are in the middle of nowhere. I am sitting in the backseat of an SUV with my mother beside me, across from the leader guy, who is just staring at me. I’m trying to ignore that part.
The worst thing right now is fearing for my life, and also the sight of Wilder’s face. He begged me not to go, and that broke me in so many ways. But I would do anything in my power to protect him and Travis, along with my brother Tristan.
My mom won’t even look at me; she is staring out the window. I can tell she is on some hardcore drugs, and she’s lost a lot of weight.
The leader opens the door, steps out, and forcefully pulls me out of the SUV. I was knocked out, and my head is killing me. My stomach will not stop growling on top of that. How can my stomach growl at a time like this?
My mom follows us, her head held high like she is the queen of the place. I am sick to my stomach that she is my mom.
We are led through a building with a lot of rooms and barely any furniture. A woman’s piercing voice shouts, “Oh my God, what are they doing to her?”
The guy pulling me along leads me through a door. A mattress without a sheet lies on the floor—it’s covered in blood.
There is also a bucket in the corner, and I guess that is where I will be using the bathroom. One thing I have to be thankful for is that my stomach is hidden by my vest. The guy pushes my mom into the room with me, and she falls to the floor. Why is she in here with me?
The door slams shut, leaving the room in complete silence. She slowly gets up off the floor, staring at me.
Fuck my life. What else can go wrong?
My nose burns from tears, but I hold that in. She was my mom. I remember times she would do nice things for me when she did not have a man. But the moment someone paid her a bit of attention, she would abandon me. The worst was when the guy showed me any attention. One of her boyfriends became very close to me and wanted to adopt me, but of course she ended that really quick. Until I met Wilder, I never even had anyone take care of me when I was sick.
“Joslyn.”
I slide down the wall and onto my butt, my legs pressed against my stomach and my arms wrapped around my legs.
“Joslyn,” she says again, just staring at me.
I flinch at the sound of my name coming from her mouth and close my eyes, ignoring her. She is the reason we were caught.
“Answer your mother!” she snaps.
I laugh. “My mother? Are you kidding me?” I shake my head.
She sneers at me, making her just as ugly as her soul. “Well, I birthed you.”
I let out a deep breath, getting my anger back under control. “Yes, that’s all you did,” I say softly. I feel sorry for her, but her whole life has been only about her. She took away my father, and she has run off every man she ever had, for one reason or another.
Her eyes widen. “I did more than that.”
I look at her sadly, tears finally falling. “What have you done for me? Please tell me.”
She opens her mouth then closes it. “I don’t know,” she whispers.
I lick my dry lips, shivering at the cold in the room. What I wouldn’t give to be held by Wilder right now, in our bed. Him making love to me. I would give anything for that right now. “All of my life, you have done nothing but make my life hell. Any good thing I ever had, you took away.” I cover my mouth, my heart hurting so bad. I miss Wilder so much, and the worst part is the last time I saw him he looked so tortured.
If I die, I want to die seeing him smiling, touching me, calling me “sweet girl.” I want a happy memory, but I can’t tell him to be happy.
I also know he will be coming for me; he just doesn’t know where I am.
“You took away my husband,” she whispers.
“Your husband tried to kill me because I didn’t give you money. I am your own flesh and blood. I would rather kill myself than think about hurting my child,” I whisper harshly, getting angry all over again.
“Your child?” =
Frig!
“You’re pregnant?”
I don’t say a word, and her eyes go to my stomach. “I could do it over, I could be a grandma to your baby.”
That will never happen, ever. She is never to be a part of my baby’s life; he isn’t going to have toxic people in his life. He is going to have the childhood I never had.
I just don’t answer her; I have nothing else to say to her. She can say or do what she wants but, in the end, it means nothing to me.
The door swings open, revealing the leader and three men. “Well, it seems there has been no movement or sign from the MC.”
From the corner of my eye, I see my mother stand and I do the same. She walks over to me, much to my horror.
“Time to say goodbye.” He raises a gun, pointing it directly at me and pulling the trigger.
Wilder
We have surrounded the warehouse, and Lane, Walker, Derek, Travis, Tristan, and I are about to storm the front door. The rest are covering the back entrances.
She is so fucking close right now; she is in this building. “Let’s go!” Lane yells and kicks in the door.
Finally.
I grin, pulling out my pistols. I walk in the door, shooting every single person I see. One by one, they all hit the ground, blood pooling around their bodies.
Travis is at my side, and we
are fucking demolishing everything in sight. Walker runs into the room, and I run to the left, opening a door.
My stomach is sick at the sight of women lying in nasty beds. “Please help me!” one woman begs. Please let Joslyn be okay. It’s known that this woman was kidnapped, and I believe pictures of her have been plastered all over town, on missing posters.
Three men run out of a room in the back, and I raise my gun and shoot. I hit two of them, and I notice the one I didn’t get is the leader from earlier.
I sprint up the hallway, through that door.
Joslyn
The gunshot goes off, but it takes me a second to realize that it wasn’t from his gun. The leader looks at the three men then at me.
He lifts his gun one more time, and I see his finger on the trigger.
The gun goes off, and it’s a blur. My mom lands on the ground in front of me, and I pat my body to find out where I was hit.
But I wasn’t.
My mom has a bullet right in the middle of her throat, and my stomach turns at the sight of her gasping for air.
The three guys step out and run away and, right before my eyes, two of them fall and hit the ground. Dead. The leader is the one who I didn’t see go down.
Then every bit of fight leaves my body at the sight of someone stepping into the room, and I cover my mouth.
It’s him.
Wilder
There she is. I almost fall on my fucking ass right then and there. She steps over her dead mother and runs over to me. I pick her up.
“Wilder, I love you.” She sobs into the side of my throat, her legs wrapped around my waist. One of my arms is across her back, and the other is holding her head to me.
I can breathe.
I take in deep breaths, looking at the ceiling, thanking God.
“Are you hurt, sweet girl?” I ask.
“I am not hurt at all,” she whispers, raising her head to look at me. “She jumped in front of a bullet for me, Wilder.” Disbelief is written across her face.
Joslyn
It’s going to be hard for me to wrap my head around the fact that my mother sacrificed herself for me. I will never understand it.
I kiss Wilder softly. My tears mingle with the kiss as I pour my whole heart into it. I just needed this moment. I just needed him.
The gunfire finally stops, and I break the kiss. He walks out of the room with me in his arms, and the first person I see is Travis. “Don’t be mad at him,” I whisper to Wilder.
Travis walks over. I hold out an arm and he pulls me from Wilder, who holds onto my hand.
“Thank God you’re okay, sis,” Travis whispers, and Wilder’s hand shakes in mine. I move back into Wilder’s arms. I can tell he wasn’t liking me being away from him. I catch the nod that Wilder gives Travis.
Walker runs to me, sweeping me off my feet. “Baby, are you okay?”
I pat his back. “I’m fine, just hungry.” This causes everyone to laugh, and I look at everybody in the room. They all look relieved, and it hits me how much everyone cares about me.
One by one, everyone comes around to hug me. “We have to get these women out of here,” Lane says. “Take her home, Wilder. I have to call the Devils.”
Wilder carries me out of the warehouse to a truck that is half a mile down the road, and he does not let me down for a second. Caleb is sitting in the truck, and he jumps out to open the door for me and Wilder.
Wilder sits down in the truck with me in his lap. He shuts the door, his arms tightening around me, his head resting on top of mine. “Take us home and tell Konrad to meet us there, Caleb,” Wilder says. Caleb’s thumbs are moving across the screen.
I just want to shower, change, and relax.
20
Joslyn
My body is shaking uncontrollably. I am not sure if I am cold or if the shock of everything that has happened is wearing off. The spray is hitting the top of my head, my hands braced against the shower wall. Arms wrap around my middle, his warmth covering me like a blanket.
Konrad just left; he checked me out from head to toe. Wilder would barely let him touch me at all. I have a knot at the top of my head where I was knocked out. That was all that happened to me.
I do not regret doing what I did for him and the others. If I hadn’t we would all be dead; there is no question.
Wilder’s hands circle my small stomach bump, and my hands rest on top of his.
“I had to, Wilder,” I whisper.
He pulls me against him. “Sweet girl, I know why you did it.”
I close my eyes and kiss the side of his neck.
“You’re so fucking brave, but it fucking killed me, Joslyn.” His body is shaking just as hard as mine.
I cover my mouth so I don’t scream. “My love, I love you so much. If I could do something to save you, I would.”
His hand smashes into the wall, cracking the tile. “It’s ingrained in every part of my soul to protect you, and them taking you right in fucking front of me. Killed me. My world ended, right there.” He spins me around, facing me. “Because you’re my world, I love you so much.”
“I love you too, which is why I did what I could to save you.”
He picks me up, and I cling to him for dear life. “Don’t be mad at Travis and Tristan,” I whisper and he nods.
A few minutes later he turns off the water, stepping out of the shower, and we go straight to our bed. “Love me, Wilder.” I tug his face over to look at me. He searches my face, and he moves me to the head of the bed. “No foreplay. I just want you.”
He twines his fingers together, resting them by my head. He slowly enters me, and I raise my legs, tucking them against his sides. I needed this. I really needed this. To feel him, to tie me back to reality. That everything is okay. I am safe right here.
He lowers his head and kisses me slowly, deeply. I can feel all of his emotions. The fear, the hurt, everything else that he has been feeling.
One thing I will never admit to him was how scared I was. God, was I scared. I am not a female who is badass. I was scared, but I will do whatever it takes to protect what’s mine.
His slow, gentle, and tender movements are drawing the pleasure out. Neither one of us wanting this moment to end, I wrap my arms around his neck, his face tucked into the side of my neck.
I tighten around him, and he twists his hips causing me to fall over the edge, shattering into a million pieces. He comes right along with me, his body shaking.
He slowly moves beside me, curling completely around me. “Don’t do that again, sweet girl,” he whispers and closes his eyes.
I hate with every part of my soul that he is hurting so much, but it was my choice and I have to live with it. The most important part is that we are alive. It had to be done, and he would have done the same thing without hesitation.
“Goodnight.”
“Goodnight, sweet girl.” He covers my jaw with his hand, his leg thrown over mine.
* * *
Hours later, I wake up with the urge to use the bathroom. I slowly slip out of the bed, making sure I don’t wake him.
The moment I wash my hands, Wilder yells, and I hear him jump off the bed. I walk out of the bathroom to see him standing in the middle of the floor with a panicked look on his face.
Oh my God.
I run over to him. He is standing stoically, just staring at me. My arms wrap around his middle.
“I woke up and I thought my nightmare had come true.”
“I am right here.” I rub the back of his neck, calming him. He climbs back in bed, pulling me with him until I am lying on his chest.
“Sleep,” I whisper
I hate this so much.
* * *
The Next Morning
“What do you want for breakfast?” I ask him. I am on his lap on the couch. The moment we woke up, we went downstairs and cuddled on the couch. The house is quiet and usually, right about now, Travis is here.
“You.”
I laugh.
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There is a knock at the door, and we look over to see Travis. Wilder motions for him to come in, and he steps inside. I can see that he is uneasy about it all.
“I was about to make breakfast. What do you want?” I ask him.
He relaxes and plops down on the couch next to me. “Anything you want to make.” He looks at Wilder before he pulls me over, hugging me. “I am glad you’re okay.”
Wilder pulls me back to him a second later.
“Wilder, why don’t you book an appointment with the baby doctor for a checkup? I’m going to make breakfast.” Wilder walks out of the room, on the phone, and Travis is watching him. “He is on edge,” I whisper.
Travis looks at the floor and swallows hard. “He was in bad shape yesterday, Jos.”
“I know. I had to, though, Travis. It killed me,” I whisper, ducking my head to hide the tears.
“I know, Jos, he loves you and it killed him to see you in danger like that.”
“I love him too, but you’re also my family. I did it for all of you.”
He smiles, letting the old Travis out. “Now I am craving some cinnamon rolls.” He helps me off the couch and leaves the room.
Wilder
I turn off the phone, having booked her appointment, which is in a couple of hours. It pays to have some doctors in your pocket. Travis walks into the room. “I didn’t mean it,” I say.
“I know, man, I understand.”
I sit in the library, looking out the window. “Yesterday was fucked up, I was scared for the first time in my life,” I admit, because it’s fucking true. That shit will forever leave a mark.
Joslyn came in and took me over. She is the only woman I have ever loved. It’s ingrained in me to protect her, to make sure she is safe—and her being in a place where I didn’t know what was happening, that was the worst feeling in the world. What are they doing to her? What if they are hurting her? Those thoughts were constantly in my mind, but it made me realize one thing.
Wilder: GRIM SINNERS MC: BOOK TWO Page 14
