Lafferty nodded.
“Do you plan to tell Chandler?”
Lafferty sighed. “I’ll tell him.”
“He won’t be happy.”
“I know it.”
“Good luck, and I mean that.”
Shelly walked in from the hall and said, “Detective Lafferty. You’re in early.”
Lafferty nodded at her. “Hi, Shel. Just leaving.” He brushed past her and strode out the door. He tried to focus his thoughts on the upcoming conversation with Chandler, but the image of Alicia Walker, half-undressed and eyes glazed with passion, filled his mind. Not yet, he told himself, and headed resolutely toward the squad room to start cleaning out his desk.
“Don’t give me any more fluids, I’m floating already,” Helen said, rejecting Alicia’s offer of juice.
“It’s breakfast time,” Alicia said, replacing the carton in the refrigerator.
“Breakfast time for roosters, maybe, not for me,” Helen groaned, closing one eye and peering through the kitchen curtains. “Is that the sun?”
“Large orange ball in a pale sky?” Alicia said.
“Looks like it,” Helen sighed. “Thanks so much for routing me out of bed in the middle of the night. I’ll look like Frankenstein’s monster at lunch today.”
Helen had been left very comfortable by a divorce from an older, wealthy investment banker, who was now engaged to wife number three. Helen worked as an assistant to a curator at the Museum of Modern Art, a job which paid a token salary but allowed her to mix with the social elite she cultivated and enjoyed.
“You have a lunch date?”
Helen sighed. “A pep talk for some possible donors. A museum employee’s work is never done.”
“You look fine,” Alicia said.
“So you say, since you’re responsible for my unfortunate condition.”
“Scrambled eggs, toast?”
“No food, please. Let’s see if I can walk.” She stood up gingerly and then sank back slowly into her chair. “I guess not.”
Alicia finally laughed. “Helen, if you are trying with these ridiculous dramatics to take my mind off my numerous troubles, you are not succeeding.”
Helen made a comic, downcast face. “I thought I was doing pretty well.”
“I’m still going to be tried for Joe’s murder.”
“And Mike Lafferty is still the object of your erotic obsession,” Helen said.
“Thanks a lot, Helen. You’ve been listening to me unburdening myself about all of this for three solid hours and that’s your conclusion?”
“Well, am I right?”
“No. I won’t be seeing Lafferty again, except in court when he takes the witness stand against me, so that’s the end of that. The police investigation is over, the detective is out of my life. I have enough to worry about now with the upcoming trial.”
“If that’s your opinion, why were you on the phone at three o’clock this morning in a semihysterical state begging me to come over here?”
Alicia shrugged. “I told you what happened with Lafferty last night. I didn’t think myself capable of such a...”
“Lapse?” Helen supplied.
Alicia nodded. “Claire saw the aftermath of it. I don’t think I will ever forgive myself for that.”
“But it’s all over now.”
“Yes.”
“And if Lafferty came back, looking at you so seriously with those pool-blue eyes?”
“He won’t come back. When he left here he looked no happier than I was. He knows that his job puts him in an impossible position. He arrested me, for heaven’s sake.” Alicia sat down opposite Helen and put her hands over her face.
“I’m sorry,” Helen said softly. “I think he really cares about you.”
Alicia withdrew her hands. “Why do you say that? You haven’t seen us together very often.”
“I didn’t have to see you often. He watches you so closely...so protectively...it’s like he feels responsible for you.” Helen stopped talking abruptly when she saw that Alicia’s eyes were slowly filling with tears.
“I know,” Alicia whispered. “That’s what makes it so hard, not seeing him again.” She wiped her eyes with the back of her hand. “How could this be any worse? For so long I felt dead, no man had looked at me with interest in what seemed like forever, and now this happens, under these horrendous circumstances.” She shook her head. “I don’t want him to disappear from my life, but how can I possibly—” She stopped, swallowing. “What am I going to do, date him? Date the cop who assembled the evidence against me while I’m out on bail? It’s bizarre, grotesque—” Alicia sobbed once, then shook her head. “The whole thing was so horrible, Joe dying, then everyone thinking I did it, the effect on the kids.” She got up and pulled a paper towel off the roll, blowing her nose. “The only bright spot was Lafferty. He was always polite, kind even, always looking out for me, and I know I seized on that. Maybe I made too much of it. I shouldn’t have asked for him to escort me, what happened last night could have been prevented....”
Helen reached across the table and put her hand over Alicia’s. “You didn’t do anything wrong. Your situation would be impossibly difficult for anybody. But you have to get over this cop and concentrate on preparing your defense now. If you keep having these emotional breakdowns, you won’t be able to focus on your case.”
Alicia nodded vigorously. “You’re right. And that’s what I plan to do—focus on my case.”
Helen glanced at the clock. “I should go. Won’t Maizie be down soon? I guess the kids will sleep late.”
“Yes. Joe always sleeps in, and Claire will be tired, considering what happened last night.”
Helen hugged her friend. “Don’t think about it. And call me if you need anything, anytime.”
“Haven’t I done that once already?” Alicia asked ruefully, smiling wanly.
“You can do it again, as often as you need. I mean that. Now try to relax and keep in touch.” Helen picked up her purse and walked out of the kitchen.
Alicia sat back in her chair and watched the sun rise higher in the sky as the day began.
“Hey, Mike, what’s this?” Chandler’s voice boomed behind him as Lafferty dumped the contents of a drawer into a cardboard box. “Going somewhere?”
“You could say that,” Lafferty replied neutrally, “I’m taking a leave.”
“A leave?” Chandler echoed, his face blank.
“Leave of absence,” Lafferty clarified, avoiding his partner’s eyes.
“What are you talking about?” Chandler said, looking stunned. “What the hell for?”
“I want to be taken off the Joseph Walker case,” Lafferty said shortly.
“Then ask for another assignment.”
Lafferty looked around the squad room, which was filled with cops absorbed in various tasks, having conversations, drinking coffee. If Chandler got any louder they would begin to attract attention.
“Can we take this next door?” Lafferty asked, slamming a second drawer shut and picking up the box filled with his desk’s former contents.
“I think we’d better,” Chandler said testily as he marched into the hall and opened the door of an interrogation room a few steps away. Lafferty followed him inside and closed the door behind him.
“Mike, what are you doing here?” Chandler demanded. “You trying to scuttle your career?”
“I’ve already talked to the captain. He’s agreed to grant me an indefinite leave.”
Chandler shook his head wonderingly, his mouth tight with anger. “It’s that dame, isn’t it? Can’t bring yourself to make a case against her?”
“I’ve already made the case, we did it together.”
“Then why do this?”
“Because I think she’s innocent, and now I want to help her prove it. That would be working against the best interest of the department, so I can’t stay on the job while I do that.”
“The best interest of the department? If the woman is guil
ty, it is in our best interest, in everyone’s best interest, to bring her to conviction. Your problem is that she’s guilty as hell but you don’t want to believe it.”
“Come on, Chandler, you know there’s a big political push to get this woman convicted. The investigation is over, there’s enough evidence to get an indictment. Nobody’s going to turn over any rocks to find clues that point in the other direction.”
“Except you, right, buddy? Except you.” Chandler sighed heavily. “Michael, this dame is using you.”
“I don’t think so.”
“Why not?”
“She doesn’t know about me doing this.”
“Oh, but she hoped you would, hmm? Maybe she can read your mind? Shouldn’t be too hard. Since she was arrested you’ve been acting like she was as pure as the driven snow. All of us ‘cop bullies’ have just been imposing on her since this whole thing began, right? If she’s got two brain cells to rub together she knew exactly how you would react. She’s playing you, Mike. She thinks you can get her off the hook, and if you do, I guarantee she’ll go back to the jet set once the case is closed.”
Lafferty shifted the cardboard box and watched as stapler, tape dispenser, paper clip holder and a dozen other sundries cascaded into the right side of the container Then he dropped the box on the floor and rubbed his eyes, trying to keep a lid on the temper that threatened to erupt with each new word Chandler spoke. Chandler was his friend, his partner and a loyal guy, but Lafferty was getting tired of hearing everyone tell him what a fool he was making of himself.
“I’m going, Charlie,” he finally said wearily. “I won’t be on the job, but I’ll be in touch.”
Chandler looked amazed. “Hell’s bells, kid, I didn’t think you were this stupid. This is your life, your pension, your whole future you’re dumping here.”
“Charlie, I can’t work to get her convicted when I think she didn’t do it, and that’s the bottom line.”
“Can’t? You mean you won’t.”
“However you look at the situation it comes down to the same result.”
“And why do you think she’s innocent?” Chandler demanded. “Because she made cow eyes at you and asked to have you for her escort at that charity do? She was setting you up!”
“I know what you think, Charlie. You have made your opinion perfectly clear. Now will you help me lug this crap down to my car or will I have to call a uniform to do it? Hanson will be taking over in a few days.”
Chandler stood staring, and then picked up the box at Lafferty’s feet, grunting as he bent down to it. “You’re making a big mistake,” he muttered under his breath as Lafferty fell in behind him.
Lafferty reached for the ring of keys in his pocket that he had to leave with the duty sergeant.
Maybe he was sacrificing his career, but he felt as if a burden had been lifted from him, a burden he’d been carrying since he first looked into Alicia Walker’s eyes and hoped she was innocent.
Alicia looked across the cherry desk at the venerable lawyer and said, “So the DA doesn’t have to prove anything for the grand jury proceeding?”
“He merely has to show the grand jury probable cause that a crime occurred and that there is enough evidence to bring you to trial,” Kirby said. “I would be astonished if they refused to return an indictment against you.”
“So I will have to go through with the trial.”
“Unless you want to plead guilty to a lesser charge, in which case I can most likely get you a deal. But your previous attorney offered you this advice while he was on the case and you rejected it.”
“Yes,” Alicia sighed. She had been closeted with Kirby for almost four hours. She had been trying to absorb the attorney’s preparation for her testimony, but all she could think about was her two children, with their father murdered and their mother on trial for the crime.
“We should go over your statement at the time of your arrest again,” Kirby said evenly.
Alicia nodded obediently She did not want to deal with any of this, thank God the lawyer was a neutral party capable of rational consideration of her case
All she really knew was that she had not killed Joe. After that, her life was in the hands of this paid expert.
The phone buzzed on Kirby’s desk, and he pressed a button and picked up the receiver.
“Joan, I asked not to be disturbed during my session with Mrs. Walker,” the lawyer said, mildly annoyed.
He listened for a few moments and then said thoughtfully, “I see.”
Alicia searched his face anxiously.
“Thank you, Joan,” Kirby said to his assistant, and hung up the phone.
“What is it?” Alicia asked.
Kirby looked back at her solemnly.
Alicia felt suddenly that her situation was about to get markedly worse.
“It appears that Detective Lafferty has removed himself from your case.”
“Removed?” Alicia whispered. “You mean he asked for a transfer?”
“More than that. Detective Lafferty is taking a leave of absence.”
Alicia felt a knot forming slowly in her stomach. “Why?” she asked quietly.
Kirby shrugged. “I have no further information.”
“He’ll still be called to testify about the evidence against me?”
“Most certainly. A leave of absence does not absolve him from his subpoena obligation, so I don’t know what he thinks he is accomplishing with this move. Frankly, it’s puzzling. Putting you away could be a career maker for him.”
I know why he’s doing it, Alicia thought despairingly, barely listening. He wants to get away from me. He wants to get away from the crazy woman who killed her husband and then threw herself at the cop in charge of investigating her case.
“Mrs. Walker?” Kirby asked.
Alicia swallowed and looked at him.
“Are you all right? You look...shaken.”
“I’m fine,” Alicia lied. “Are we almost done here?”
The lawyer started to talk again, summing up, but Alicia was not listening.
Lafferty had abandoned her. He had taken a radical path to sever himself from her entirely. He might not have to see much more of her, anyway, since the arrest phase was over, but if he was totally removed from the case he would never have to deal with her again at all. So he had decided to be safe. He would just testify in court and then leave her to fate.
Alicia felt a dull weight at the pit of her stomach but was too drained to cry.
She had never felt more alone.
Chapter 6
The austere, paneled lobby of the New York Athletic Club at Seventh Avenue and Central Park South was filled with plaques and photos commemorating past sporting events and business fetes. Lafferty ignored them as he emerged into the dark, spacious, leather-smelling room. His sneakered feet made no sound on the parquet floor, which gave way to plush carpeting at the sides and back of the hall. His hair was still damp from his shower after the handball game with Steve Killian, whose wealthy father had been a member of the club for thirty years. He had met Killian in a forensics class at John Jay, and they had been playing together weekly ever since. Killian, a Department of Justice researcher with the New York Division who liked Lafferty because he lived the adventures Killian only read about, stopped short at the sight of a well-dressed young woman waiting nervously just inside the double doors to the street.
“Mike,” he said carefully, nodding to the right, “is that who I think it is?”
Lafferty followed the direction of Killian’s gaze curiously and then froze.
“Wait for me,” Lafferty said to Killian, who stopped walking but remained riveted to the scene, his eyes wide behind his gray-tinted glasses.
“What are you doing here?” Lafferty greeted Alicia, taking in her stylish skirt and blouse. She was immaculate as always, even when working on her last reserve of strength.
“I know I shouldn’t have come,” Alicia replied hastily, as if she had rehearsed a spee
ch, “but no one at the police department would tell me anything. The captain and that man Chandler, they wouldn’t give me your address, and you’re not listed in the phone book.”
“Standard procedure for cops,” Lafferty said shortly. “So how did you find me?”
“I finally got your address from my grandmother.”
Alicia and the old lady going head to head. Lafferty would have bought a ticket to that.
“And when I went to your apartment house the super there told me that you play handball here at the club every Monday afternoon,” Alicia continued.
Lafferty wondered what else chatty Mrs. Martinez, aka The Voice of New York, had told Alicia. The minimum most people escaped with was her recipe for arroz con pollo and a diatribe about the parking situation in Queens. He stared down at Alicia inquiringly and then reached out for her hand.
Alicia snatched her fingers from his. She bit her lip, and despite her best efforts at control her eyes filled with tears.
“I just wanted you to know that I understand your decision to take a leave of absence and get away from my mess,” she said quietly. “It is obvious that your involvement with me could backfire badly for you, and the best way to steer clear of any possible scandal is to get off the case.”
“Alicia, that’s not why I did it....”
She held up her hand to interrupt him, determined to have her say. Lafferty fell silent.
“I will always be indebted to you for the help you gave me and for your willingness to keep an open mind when everyone else had me convicted. I understand of course that you still have your doubts and that’s why—” She stopped and swallowed hard.
“Alicia...”
She closed her eyes and shook her head, unable to continue. Tears slipped from under her closed lids and ran down her cheeks.
“Please don’t lie to me, Mike, I can’t bear it,” she whispered finally.
“Lie to you? What...?” He took her by the shoulders and pulled her toward him, and at his touch her resolve faltered. He enfolded her in his arms and she rested her head on his shoulder.
“Settle down. Stay and talk to me,” he murmured. He needed time to explain what he had done, but the feel of her in his arms and the scent of her skin, her hair, her perfume drove the calming words from his mind. He felt as if he were back in the Scarsdale kitchen with her and looking for the nearest bed. His reaction to her was always the same—desire flooded his body and drove all other considerations into the dark.
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