by Pamela Morsi
Which was precisely the reason she had never spoken to him.
That was the last thing in the world she needed, to get all goofy and lovestruck over some man. She’d had her man. They’d had a good marriage and raised a wonderful son. Romantic for her was over and done now. She was a grown-up, sensible woman, not some silly teenager.
It was after six when Nathan got home.
“It’s about time you showed up,” Calla said. “Dinner’s almost ready.”
“Yeah, I smelled your cooking all the way across the street and came running,” her son teased.
He hurried to the bathroom to wash up as she set the table. Two plates, two forks, two knives, two spoons. It had been just the two of them now for almost five years. But two was an excellent number. She and Nathan were a team and they shared the same goal. Getting him through high school and into a good college. That goal had often seemed so far off that Calla had thought it would never happen. Now their dream was nearing realization. And it was as if all those years of reaching for it had gone by in a flash.
Nathan hurried to the table and took a seat. “Give me a pork chop before I bite into the table leg,” he threatened.
Calla chuckled lightly as she seated herself and passed him the platter of meat. Everyone said that Nathan was just like her. But when she looked at him, she saw so much of her late husband. Nathan was lean and lanky. He had a bubbly humor that charmed everyone he met. But he also had a streak of kindheartedness that was as wide as Lake Michigan. Calla was absolutely certain he hadn’t gotten that from her. And she worried where it might lead him.
“I guess you’ve been over at Mrs. Cleveland’s place,” Calla said with deliberate casualness. “Visiting her niece. That’s very nice, of course, but you mustn’t neglect your other friends.”
Nathan eyed his mother with open amusement. “My other friends understand completely why I want to spend time with Jazleen.”
Her son was grinning. Calla didn’t like that much.
“She’s pretty lonely,” he continued. “It’s bad enough to be going through a lot of stuff, but then to spend all your time alone—that just makes it worse.”
“Isn’t she making friends at school?”
Nathan hesitated slightly. “She’s sort of blown school off.”
“What do you mean by that?”
“She pretty much ignored it the last couple of years, and when she showed up this year to enroll, they transferred her to the alternative high school. That ticked her off. She said if she couldn’t take classes with me, then there was no point going.”
Calla raised an eyebrow. “That doesn’t make any sense at all.”
Nathan shrugged. “She was so far behind, she wasn’t going to be able to keep up in my classes anyway,” he said. “But it is kind of worthless to sit around all day watching TV, just waiting for me to get home.”
Calla agreed with that. She was not happy, however, that the girl was planning her life, living her life around Nathan.
“What does Mrs. Cleveland say about her dropping out of school?”
“I don’t think she knows, Mom.”
“What do you mean? She must know.”
Nathan shook his head. “Her job is way across town. She leaves to catch her train before seven in the morning and she doesn’t get home until after five. She and Jazzy hardly say two words to each other. I seriously doubt they’ve talked this out together.”
Calla’s dinner was suddenly tasteless. “You know I’ll have to tell her.”
Her son nodded. “Yeah, I know. Jazzy really needs…she really needs something, someone…I don’t know. Mom, she’s clever and smart and doesn’t have a lazy bone in her body. But she’s just…you know…drifting without any direction.”
Calla nodded. There were a lot of young people like that.
“I try to talk to her about college and the future and all the things that I’m working for,” Nathan said. “I might as well be telling fairy tales. She doesn’t see how any of it could ever apply to her.”
“Well, it probably won’t,” Calla said. “If she can’t stick it out in high school, then she’ll never get a chance at college.”
“But she could stick it out, Mom,” Nathan said. “I know she could.”
Calla wasn’t so sure.
Saturday morning dawned sunny with a bright blue sky. Seated at the breakfast table in her robe, Calla lingered over her coffee. It was just laziness, she assured herself, and had nothing to do with the view outside her window. Her kitchen looked directly into Landry Sinclair’s backyard, and the man himself was out there, clad in faded jeans and a sweatshirt that clung damply to his muscular torso. His sweat was well earned as he attacked the ground with a shovel and a hoe. He looked very different without his tailored suits. She’d always thought of him as tidy and professional. Not the kind of man to get his hands dirty.
He was certainly getting dirty this morning. And he looked really good doing it. Calla watched him as he worked, allowing herself the secret pleasure of lusting after a man who wasn’t hers. She thought she’d left all that nonsense in the past. But somehow, from the moment Landry Sinclair moved into the neighborhood, she’d felt differently.
And she didn’t like it one bit. Every woman on the block had already staked a claim. Calla hated to follow along with the crowd. And she despised the kind of mooning over men that a lot of women her age engaged in. It was one thing to be boy crazy at fourteen. It was downright undignified to be that way at forty.
Still, she could hardly take her eyes from the vision of Landry Sinclair sweating over a garden hoe.
A knock sounded at the front door. She glanced at the clock. It was barely nine. She couldn’t imagine who would be visiting so early. She went to peer through the peephole. The familiar figure standing on the porch was visible only in profile. Her long, thin legs and round backside were encased in tight jeans. Her skimpy jacket showed off her curves but wouldn’t provide any protection if the weather turned colder. And her long dark hair was a flawless mix of braids and curls.
Her expression, however, even from the side, appeared wary and secretive.
Calla opened the door.
“Good morning, Jazleen.”
The girl’s suspicion toughened into something that looked like hostility.
“Where’s Nathan?” she demanded with no other greeting.
“He’s sleeping,” Calla answered. “It’s Saturday morning. That’s what he does on Saturday mornings.”
“We’re going…someplace,” Jazleen hedged. “He’s supposed to be ready.”
“He probably overslept. Come in and I’ll wake him up.”
“I’m okay on the porch,” Jazleen said, her chin slightly in the air.
“Come in,” Calla insisted, knowing the girl’s hesitation to enter the house was because of her. Jazleen had been inside with Nathan many times.
Hesitantly she followed Calla. “I’ll go wake him,” Jazleen said.
“No!” Calla answered firmly. “You wait here, pour yourself a cup of coffee. I’ll wake my son.”
As she went up the stairs, Calla glanced back towards the girl. She stood in the doorway of the kitchen, her arms wrapped around her as if she were cold or protecting herself.
At the top of the stairs, Calla turned right and knocked on her son’s door.
“Nathan? Nathan!”
An unintelligible rumbling was the only reply. Calla opened the door and peered into the shadows for an instant before crossing the darkened room and pulling up the shades. A wide shaft of sunlight revealed her son completely cocooned in a tangle of blankets.
He groaned.
“Better get up,” Calla told him. “You’ve got company downstairs.”
“Huh?” he asked, without bothering to poke his head out of the covers.
“Jazleen is here,” she said. “Apparently you were going someplace together this morning.”
Nathan moaned again and rolled over, flipping back the blankets to revea
l his face and T-shirt clad torso.
“Oh yeah,” he said. “I told her I would take her to Oak Street Beach. I couldn’t believe she’d lived here all her life and never been.”
Calla nodded.
With a sigh of determination, Nathan rolled out of bed. “Let me get a quick shower,” he told his mother. “Tell her I’ll be downstairs in fifteen minutes.”
Calla left him to get ready and returned to the kitchen. Jazleen was still standing in the middle of the floor.
“Nathan says fifteen minutes,” Calla told her. “Would you like a cup of coffee?”
“No,” Jazleen answered too quickly.
“Are you sure?” Calla asked. “I’m going to have another cup.”
Jazleen hesitated. “I don’t mind,” she said, finally.
It wasn’t exactly “yes, please,” but Calla decided it was the best excuse for manners that the girl could muster.
“Sit down,” she told her as she set the cup on the table. “There’s milk and sugar.”
Jazleen reluctantly seated herself. Calla took the chair opposite her. The girl continued to eye her warily. The silence lengthened between them. Calla was racking her brain for a neutral subject and was just about to comment on the weather when Jazleen spoke.
“That man next door has got a shovel,” she said. “I think he’s burying something.”
Calla glanced in the direction of the window. She couldn’t see Landry Sinclair at this angle, but she could still perfectly recall the sight of the man.
“He’s digging a garden,” Calla said.
Jazleen’s brow furrowed and she snorted in disbelief. “This time of year? Not likely. He’s burying something.”
So much for neutral conversation, Calla thought.
“Nathan said you two are headed for an outing to Oak Street Beach.”
Jazleen didn’t answer. She eyed Calla suspiciously and then sipped her coffee as if that gave her permission not to comment. Her eyes were widely set and a rich dark brown. She was wearing a bit too much make-up, but a cleft in her chin made her look vulnerable.
“We used to go to Oak Street Beach a lot when Nathan was a little boy,” Calla told her. “Lots of fresh air and room to run around. On a crisp fall day it’s absolutely the best. He would sit and just look at the boats on the water.”
She paused, but again Jazleen said nothing.
“I’m sure that’s what he wants to share with you,” Calla continued. “Even if it does mean giving up a sleepy Saturday morning.”
Calla was frustrated when the girl made no attempt to keep up her side of the conversation. She decided maybe questions and answers would be easier.
“Nathan says you watch a lot of TV?”
“Some.”
“Have you seen anything good lately?”
She shook her head.
“I like those dancing shows,” Calla told her. “But more often I prefer reading.”
Jazleen sipped her coffee.
“Do you like to read?”
The girl shrugged.
“When I was your age, that was what I loved best.”
Jazleen raised a brow. It wasn’t exactly an eye roll, but Calla was fairly sure it had the same meaning.
“Do you know how to read?” Calla asked.
“Of course I do!” Jazleen snapped. “I’m not stupid.”
“I didn’t think that you were,” Calla said. “But a lot of very smart people don’t read, or don’t read very well.”
“I can read fine, thank you.”
“Okay, good.” Calla hesitated. “Nathan said you’ve dropped out of school.”
“Maybe. I haven’t decided.”
“What does your aunt think about it?”
“I’d guess she’d think that it’s none of her business,” Jazleen declared. “And it’s sure none of yours.”
The young girl’s expression was angry. Calla was not feeling very friendly herself.
“If you’re seeing my son, then I make it my business,” she answered.
“What? You trying to turn him into some mama’s boy?”
“Every male on this earth is a mama’s boy,” Calla said. “He may love her or he may hate her, but there is nobody else in the world who can talk to a man the way his mama does.”
Jazleen’s jaw set tightly with anger.
“Nathan and I are very close,” Calla told the girl quietly. “If you stay tight with him, you’re going to have to deal with me. So maybe you should think about getting used to it.”
After the teenagers left, Calla didn’t even attempt to get back to lazy day musing. Saturdays were busy days with chores she put off all week, but she couldn’t help thinking about Nathan and Jazleen. So it wasn’t surprising that just after lunchtime, she headed across the street to have a chat with Gerty Cleveland.
The woman took her time getting to the door. The tiny apartment was crowded with furniture, but it was neat as a pin except for the area around the recliner that sported TV trays on either side loaded with food, drink, tissues, assorted junk and the remote control. As soon as Calla walked inside, Gerty returned to the chair and popped it into the raised position.
“I try to keep my feet up every minute that I’m home,” she explained to Calla. “As it is, I’ll be lucky to get five more years of work out of them.”
It seemed to Calla it was probably already time for Gerty to stop working. Steel-gray hair covered her head, her hands shook and she didn’t hear all that well.
“I wanted to talk to you about Jazleen.”
“Say what?”
“I wanted to talk to you about Jazleen,” she repeated a bit louder.
“Jazleen? She’s a sweet girl,” Gerty said. “I was real reluctant to take her. Her mama’s no good. And my sister, her own grandma, gone to Jesus twenty years ago. She was living with my daughter, Val, for a month or two. But there was some kind of trouble with Val’s man. So there was no one else and here she is. But she keeps the place tidied up, and when I get home from work, she’s always got some kind of dinner for me. That’s been nice, real nice.”
“Did you know she’s thinking of dropping out of school?”
“No, I didn’t pay no attention to that. Guess if she’s not going to school, she should get a job. That’s what I did. I left school and got myself a job.”
“Things were different back then,” Calla told her. “Nowadays it’s tough to find a job if you don’t finish high school.”
The old woman nodded absently. “That’s likely true.”
“You shouldn’t let her drop out,” Calla said.
“I hope she won’t,” Gerty said. “But truth to tell, as long as she don’t get into no trouble, I’m tempted to just let her be.”
Calla shook her head to disagree, but her neighbor forestalled her.
“You don’t know the life that girl has lived,” Gerty said. “She’s had troubles like you and me have never seen. That doesn’t happen to people and leave them unmarked. If she can find some happiness on her own, then I’m all for letting her have it.”
Calla continued talking with Gerty for a half hour or more, but it was clear that the old woman had no plans for Jazleen’s future and was only vaguely interested in the young woman’s present.
“But you must be worried.”
“The girl will be all right,” Gerty assured her. “She’ll find her way. I don’t have the time or the energy to make sure she does this, that or the other. She’s nearly grown, so she’s on her own. Besides, she has that boy of yours to make do for her.”
“What?”
“It was real smart of her to latch on to him,” Gerty said. “He’s got a lot of gumption and he’s not afraid of hard work. He’ll be like his daddy, a good family man. Jazleen is lucky in that.”
“Nathan is off to college next year,” Calla explained.
The older woman eyed her skeptically. “That’s what you’re hoping,” she said. “But he seems mighty sweet on her.”
Calla
shook her head. “No, it’s just a passing thing. It’s not serious between them.”
Gerty Cleveland didn’t believe a word of that.
Calla left the woman’s apartment and went straight to the supermarket to do her weekly shopping. The day had gotten significantly colder, but she found the chilly wind invigorated her.
It was too bad about Jazleen, she thought to herself. The girl might be stuck-up and rude, but she was still a girl. And someone Nathan seemed to think was special. But if she was pinning her hopes on snagging Calla’s son, she was doomed to be disappointed. Jazleen would end up like a thousand other girls. Working at a menial job as she struggled to raise kids she could hardly support.
Calla decided it would be her goal to make sure that none of those kids were on the way before she could get Nathan safely off to college.
By the time she’d made it home from the store and put the groceries away, she was tired. The house was cozy and warm. She settled herself on the couch with a book but hadn’t read more than a half-dozen pages when her eyelids began to get heavy. She set her book open upside down on her chest and lay back on a throw pillow to catch a quick twenty winks. The glare from the reading lamp seemed to permeate her eyelids, so she switched it off and drifted into a comfortable nap.
Voices from the kitchen awakened her sometime later.
“Let me fix you something to warm you up.”
“Just wrap me in your arms—that gets me about as warm as I need.”
Nathan chuckled, a low masculine sound.
The ensuing silence spoke for itself. They both seemed a little breathless when the conversation resumed.
“What do you want to do?” Nathan asked.
“Uh…let’s just sit together and talk,” Jazleen replied.
He chuckled. “You haven’t had enough talk from me already? I’ve been at it for hours.”
“I love to hear you talk,” she said.
“It’s crazy how we never run out of things to say.”
“Yeah, strange,” she agreed. “But in a good way.”
“That is, until I start talking about school, and then you just say nothing at all.”
