I'm so angry, I can't even speak. My hands clenched at my sides, I turn and run away from Christian. I go into my bedroom and lock the door behind me, scooping my baby into my arms and cradling her close. Tears start pouring down my cheek as I sit in the rocking chair, and hold her tight. I don't know what to do. This isn't how this was supposed to happen. I never imagined being a mother, but now that I have Aurora in my arms, the thought of anyone taking her from me is unbearable. I want my daughter to know who she is, and her family, but how do I let her do that when it means I could lose her to a life I can't even begin to imagine?
* * *
Christian
I stomp out of the house, slamming the door behind me, and let out an angry yell. I feel completely helpless, and I’ve always hated that feeling. I've never felt so conflicted, so confused about anything in my life, and I don't know what to do. The feelings I have for Piper are different than anything I've ever felt for another woman, and I can't deny how much I love my child. This isn't the life I envisioned, but I can't change it, and I can't pretend it didn't happen.
I force myself to get under control before walking back into the house. I make my way to the bedroom, but the door is locked shut. Clenching my teeth against the surge of anger I feel, I knock.
"What?" Piper says.
"I need to talk to you," I say through the door, as calmly as I can.
"I don't have anything to say to you," she says.
"Yes, you do. I have some things I need to say to you, too. We have to talk about this. You can't just sit in a locked room and pretend it's not happening. That's not going to make it go away."
"I don't think it's going to make it go away," she snaps. "But it might make you go away."
"Is that really what you want, Piper? Do you want me to walk out of your house like we never met? Because that's not what I want. I can't just go back there and act like my life is the same it has always been. It's not, and it never will be. And that’s okay."
After a few tense, silent seconds, I hear the door unlock, and it opens slightly. I push it the rest of the way open and step into the room. Cradling Aurora in her arms, Piper stands in front of me.
Looking at her, I realize all the anger from earlier has vanished. Now I just want to figure this all out between us.
"You're not going to take her from me," she says.
Shaking my head, I step toward her.
"I don't want to take her from you," I say. "You're her mother. I would never do that to you, Piper. I enjoyed every day I've spent with you, and now we are linked through this baby, our precious baby, forever. No matter what happens between us, our lives won’t ever be truly separate because of her. We have to figure out some way to make this work. We have to create some sort of relationship that will give her the best life possible. But we also have to make sure she has a relationship with everyone in her life who cares about her, and that includes my parents, as well as Tabitha. Aurora deserves to know my side of the family, and my mother and father deserve what might be their only chance of a grandchild."
"Their only chance?" Piper asks. "You're an only child, too?"
"No," I say. "Well, yes."
Her eyes narrow with frustration.
"Which one is it? Are you trying to hide something from me? You can’t be an only child but not.”
"Yes, I can. I wasn't born an only child. I had an older brother, Nicholas. He died. I'm all that's left."
I can't go into any more detail about it. Not now. There's too much already going on, and I’m feeling too emotionally strained as it is. I don't want to talk about Nicholas or what happened to him, or what his death meant for my family. I've already shown too much emotion in front of Piper as it is.
"I'm so sorry, Christian," Piper says.
"Thank you. But now you understand better why it matters so much for my parents to meet Aurora. They think of her as their future, too.”
I can see Piper is thinking about everything I just said. She looks conflicted and worried, but the anger in her eyes has softened. Finally, she looks over at me and nods.
"Alright," she says.
Her voice is so low, I almost don't hear her.
"Alright?" I confirm.
She nods.
"It's been a long time since I was part of a big family, but I know how much it can mean to someone. Before my parents got divorced, I would spend time with my mother's side of the family a few times a year. I was really young, so I don't have too many memories of them, but I can remember playing with my cousins, and that I had aunts and uncles. When my mother left, all of them vanished from our lives. My father told me once that it wasn't my fault, that they didn't leave because of anything the two of us had done. They separated themselves from us because they wanted distance from my mother. That never made any sense to me."
"Do you miss them?" I ask.
She shakes her head, but even as she admits this, she looks sadder.
"No," she says. "It's like with my mother. I don't have many memories, and those I do have are from so long ago I'm not even completely sure if they are actual memories or something my brain made up from Dad telling me stories. I don't feel anything for them, but I do miss the idea of having more family around. I've always wanted to experience a big, tightly-knit family.” Piper takes a breath as if preparing to admit something difficult. "I don't know what any of this is going to mean long-term, but I can't deny Aurora the chance to know her family and her heritage.”
I smile, feeling my shoulders fall forward and relax. I know there are challenges ahead. We still have to find a balance for Aurora’s life that will straddle two countries. And I’m unsure if I can ignore the feelings I still have for Piper. Those feelings are something I'm going to have to work out. But we've taken a step in the right direction. Convincing her to return to Cambria with me is one challenge I've overcome. We'll figure out the rest as we go.
Chapter Fourteen
Christian
I don't want to give Piper the opportunity to change her mind, so I make a call, and by the next morning we are headed to Cambria on my family’s private plane. Tabitha came over this morning before we left to say goodbye and was understandably startled by everything Piper told her. The cautious, almost cold way Tabitha reacted to me makes me nervous about what’s waiting for us at home. I hate feeling like this. We're grown adults, but I'm still worried about what my parents will think of her – the woman I met in an airport, slept with repeatedly for two weeks, and then left back in the States before knowing she was pregnant. That does not make the strongest foundation for familial harmony, especially when one of the families rules a country with traditions and rules that date back hundreds of years.
I can see Piper has the same worries, so I'm trying to stay as outwardly positive as possible for her. The last thing she needs is to feel like she's going into this as an outcast.
"How are you doing?" I ask, glancing over at her.
I remember how she looked on our first flight together. Her dark brown hair and emerald-green eyes drew me in from the first time we met. I knew nothing about her then except that there was a very good chance she had on cute underwear, and that she was traveling with several years’ worth of condoms. But even in her abject, irrational terror, I thought she was irresistible. I wanted to reassure her then, and that hasn't changed. There's just more to it now.
"I'm fine," she says. "We've gotten past take off, and we're still a couple of hours till landing, so we're in the good part."
I laugh.
"Way to see the silver lining."
"Nailing it."
There's still an awkward tension between us. We seem unsure of how to navigate being back in the same space, but not in the same relationship. Rather than experiencing things together like we did last year, it's like we're orbiting each other at a distance. We're both cautious, but in the rare moments when our eyes meet, the heat and attraction between us are still obvious. My body remembers her, and even the slightest whiff of h
er perfume is enough to make me hard, but I also find myself missing the way she felt curled against me at night as we talked before falling asleep.
"Aurora is doing well," I say, if nothing more than to keep the conversation going. "She doesn't even seem to realize anything's different."
"I guess that comes along with being a month old," she says. "As long as you have food and access to a clean diaper, life is not going to change much. It's probably pretty easy to go with the flow."
She looks over at me like she wants to ask something but turns away again.
"Piper? What is it?" I ask.
She hesitates again.
"Are they going to like me?" she asks. "I mean, I know that doesn't really matter. That's not the point of the trip. We are going so that they can meet Aurora, and how can you not adore her, but... How are they going to respond to me? I’m so nervous."
I've never seen Piper look so unsure of herself, and I want to gather her up in my arms and comfort her. Instead, I go over to the leather bench where she sits and sit down beside her. I reach for her hand, tucking it into mine. The feeling of her skin against mine reminds me of the rush of the days we spent together, and I meet her eyes. There's a flood of emotion behind them, and I speak to her carefully, wanting to reassure her, but also knowing I have to be cautious with what I say.
"Don't worry," I say. "I know it sounds pretty daunting that you're going to meet the king and queen of a country, but it doesn't have to be. Just don't think of it that way. You're just meeting my parents, the grandparents of your child. That's all. Don't think of them as anything, or anyone, else."
"That's easy for you to say," she says. "You're a prince. You have no idea what it's like to meet someone more important than you."
"They're not more important than you," I say. "They're just people who were lucky enough to be born into certain families. That's all."
"Yeah, but Christian, you were born into a certain family that has absolute rule over an entire country."
"They're going to love you."
"You really think so? I know I can… be a lot at first."
I chuckle and nod. There's no way I'm going to try to deny that.
"You can," I say. "But you've gotten better about it. You're calmer than you were before Aurora was born. You seem to have less of a temper. It doesn’t really matter what they think of you, anyway,”
Even as I say it, I wonder how much I actually believe it. I know the primary purpose the two of them are coming to Cambria with me is for my parents to meet Aurora, but I can't pretend they won't take the chance to evaluate Piper as well. After all, this is the woman who carried my child without telling me, but also brought their only grandchild into the world. Just like I told Piper before we left, she's a part of their lives forever now, and they'll want to see how she fits into them. I hope they'll like her, and that they'll accept her for who she is.
I'm optimistic about bringing her home. It was formal and traditional, but the communication from them requesting I bring Aurora back didn't sound angry, or even forceful. Sending out messages like that is something my parents do routinely, to the point that I've often teased them about their inability to use modern technology effectively, so I didn’t think too much of it. Talking to them was the real gauge of how they were feeling about the situation. When I spoke to my mother on the phone to let her know we'd be arriving today, she was pleasant. There wasn't any hint of resentment or plans to reach back into the history of the monarchy and imprison Piper in a tower somewhere. She even sounded excited to see us. It might not be as bad as either of us are thinking. Maybe things will go smoothly, and they will love Piper. Then we can start building a future together.
Well, shit. This isn't going well.
To say my reunion with my parents wasn't exactly a happy one would be a tremendous understatement. The moment we arrived at the palace and I brought Piper to the apartment of rooms set aside for her, Frederik came and said my parents wanted to see us. I knew they would be anxious to meet Piper, and especially Aurora, but the way he said it didn't sound like he was looking forward to presenting us. Instead, there was dread in his voice. He isn't the most positive person I've ever encountered, but his tone was ominous, even for him. Piper went to pick Aurora up from the bassinet she was resting in, but Frederik stopped her.
"They only wish to speak to the two of you," he said. “I'll send a nanny to sit with her in case she wakes up."
"A nanny?" Piper asked. "They sent for you twenty-four hours ago, and they already have a nanny here?"
"My parents like to be prepared," I told her.
The fact that a nanny was sitting in the room with the baby, though, is the furthest thing from my mind now as we stand in front of my mother and father. We are in one of the parlors, and both of them look tense and angry as they scrutinize us. My mother grips a cup of tea, though she hasn't taken a single sip of it since we came into the room. Instead, she's holding it like a weapon. For all I know, there could be acid in the cup, and she's waiting for the right moment to spring it on us. It would be diabolical.
"I don't understand," Piper says. "How did this happen?"
My mother's eyes cut to her, before sliding back to rest on me.
I might have just cast my mother as the next James Bond-style supervillain, but any remaining humor is now gone. I won't let her treat Piper so dismissively.
"Answer her, Mother," I say. "She asked you a question."
"What is it that you want me to say to her, Christian? I already told you the situation."
"No," I say. "You told us there are rumors circulating about us."
Somehow in the span of one day, everything has changed. We arrived back to Cambria with my parents in an uproar, and I feel like we've been tossed headlong into the chaos, without either one of us knowing what the hell is going on.
"That doesn’t even begin to cover it," my mother says. "The tabloid media has started publishing stories that there's a new illegitimate royal baby produced through some lascivious affair with an American."
"How could they have found that out?" Piper asks.
My mother eyes her again.
"I don't know," she says, a slightly vicious edge to her voice. "Someone must have leaked the story."
Subtlety has never been my mother's strong suit, but even if it was, it wouldn't take much for Piper to detect the thinly veiled shot at her.
"I didn't say anything," she says. "I didn't even know that Christian was a prince until yesterday. Your son decided to leave that minor little detail out when we met." Piper looks at me. "That very well could be the issue. We weren't exactly trying to hide, or conceal your identity. Any number of people could have recognized you and taken a picture of us without us realizing it. I wouldn't have even thought to pay attention to other people when we were getting to know each other."
The comment sends warmth through my chest, but an instant later, it disappears.
"Getting to know each other?" my mother says. "That's an interesting way to put it. I'd venture to say you knew each other pretty well by the night you met."
"Cut it out, Mother," I snap. "There's no need for you to talk to Piper like that. She didn't even have to come here. She's not one of your subjects. She came here because I asked her to. Your demands don't mean shit to her."
"Watch how you talk to your mother," my father says.
He's always been the quiet one of the two, but the brooding quality to his anger still holds hints of the wild streak he had when he was younger. Many people have said I'm exactly what he would have been like if his father hadn't gotten him under control when he was young.
"Do you have any idea what this could do to the family, Christian?" My mother asks. "We've already been through so much, first with your brother, then with your father's illness. The future King having some sort of mindless fling with a woman while on holiday, then having a child he didn't even know about, is just unacceptable. This could cause a scandal with unimaginable repercussions. H
aving public opinion turn against you before you are even crowned would be disastrous."
"Why do you keep talking about Papa like he's on his deathbed?" I ask. "He's going to be King for a very long time. I don't need to worry about public opinion turning against me right now."
"Of course, you do," she says. "It doesn't matter whether you become King twenty years from now, or tomorrow. How people look at you, what they think of you, matters. The trust and faith they'll have in you as their ruler starts before you ever ascend. But you're not just threatening your own reputation. You're dragging us into it as well."
"So, what are you saying?" I ask. "You want me to just send them back, and pretend they never existed?"
"No," my father says, speaking up for the first time. "We want you to get married."
I see Piper's mouth fall open out of the corner of my eye. She looks at me, then back at my father.
"Get married?" Piper squeaks.
"You can't be serious," I say.
"We're very serious, Christian. This situation isn't acceptable for a Crown Prince, and you have to think about the baby. An illegitimate child can't be in line for the throne. As is, Aurora will have no claim to her heritage or her inheritance. She would be a total outcast. These stories are only going to get nastier, and more invasive. They'll go out of their way to humiliate Piper, and shame you."
"I don't care about any of that," Piper says. "This isn't even my country. I don't care what they say about me, or what they think about my choices. And to be honest, I don’t think you care either."
My mother looks shocked.
"What do you mean by that?"
"We supposedly came here so you could meet your grandchild, but you requested we leave her in a bedroom with a nanny rather than bringing her to you. You don't care about meeting her. All you care about is damage control. You don't want your son to be some sort of sensational news story. That's not the point of me being here, though."
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