by Isabella
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“Hello Claire!” said the voice on the other end. “Are you OK? Have they found Mike?”
“Well, actually no.” Claire suddenly wondered if it was a good idea to call Jordan after all. She felt her anxiety level rise at the thought of saying things out loud that she wasn’t really ready to admit to herself as it was. But she was already on the phone and it was a little too late to second guess herself now. Besides, Jordan knew her like a book and would know if she was keeping something from her.
“Okay, what’s wrong?” Jordan asked when Claire didn’t say anything, “Grace! Is Grace all right?”
“Grace is fine. I just put her down to bed. Oh, I’m sorry for calling so late. Maybe I should just call you tomorrow, and we can talk then?”
“Oh no you don’t, you know that it’s never too late for you to call.” Claire could hear the concern in Jordan’s voice. “Look sweetie you know you can call anytime, day or night. What’s going on? Are you all right?”
“Well …” Claire hesitated, not knowing where to start.
“Yes?”
“Well, as a matter-of-fact something did happen tonight. Today in fact.”
“Oh no, Is it bad Claire? Do you need me to get on a plane tonight?”
“No… it’s not, bad really… well it’s… well I…” She took a deep breath and tried to stop her hands from shaking.
“Relax, hon. Whatever it is we can get through this. Take a deep breath and just tell me what’s happened. I can be there in a day if you need me right now.”
Taking a deep breath again, she closed her eyes. It wasn’t as easy to talk about it as she had hoped it would be.
“How long have we known each other, hon? Hmm, since forever, right? You can tell me anything. You know that, don’t you? So shoot.”
“Well, remember me telling you about the officer who came to the house to inform me of Mike’s accident? She’s really gone out of her way to help us with everything that has been going on here and well … I kissed her tonight and I don’t know what to do now.” There, I said it. It’s out in the open and I can’t take it back now. Jordan will know what to do. Scared when she didn’t hear anything on the other end of the line, Claire took a deep breath and tried again.
“Jordan? You still there?”
“Yeah, I think we might have a bad connection though. Did you just say what I think you said?”
“I’m afraid so. I kissed Major Caldwell tonight. Oh Jordan, what am I going to do now?” Claire felt like she was going to break down any moment and her voice gave away her secret as she continued talking to Jordan. “It happened so fast and before I knew what I was doing it was over with. Oh god, it felt so good. I’m screwed, aren’t I?”
“Okay sweetie, hold on and tell me exactly what happened. It isn’t everyday that you just kiss a total stranger. Besides, does Major Caldwell know about you?”
“Look, I don’t even know if Nic, I mean, Major Caldwell, is gay, let alone if she knows anything about me and Mike. I mean I doubt she knows anything, and besides she isn’t a total stranger. We have sort of known each other since college.” Claire told her long time friend about the events that had happened in the last few days and how she knew Nic. Before long Jordan knew everything that had happened all the way down to the little detail of how Nic’s body felt under Claire’s touch.
“Shit, kid this is something. One day you’re a widow, the next you’re groping the body of a hot female officer. Geez, leave it to you to get all the breaks.” Claire knew Jordan was making light of the situation for her benefit, and the effort made her smile.
“God Jordan, please this is bad. What am I going to do?”
“Well did she say anything when she left? I mean how did she act? Was she weirded out or did she act normal?”
“Actually she was pretty calm about the whole thing.”
“You mean she acted like this kinda thing happened to her all of the time?”
“Well, not exactly. I sort of dismissed her. She said she had things that needed to be taken care of at the office and thanked me for dinner and left. Oh god, I was awful to her because I was so embarrassed about what happened. I should call and apologize to her.” Frantic, all Claire could think to do was hang up the phone and call Nic to apologize for her behavior.
“WAIT, wait, wait… calm down, Claire. Just take a deep breath and let’s think this thing through. You have been through so much in the past few days that it is probably normal that you would act differently than expected. She has probably seen worse behavior that she can’t explain, especially in situations like this. You just might make things worse if you call and bring this all out again. Besides, you said she reacted to your touch, too, didn’t you? So maybe she doesn’t want to be reminded of her reaction either? Even if it was as innocent as you said it was.” Jordan’s voice was calm and certain.
“Look, maybe the best thing to do right now is to ignore what happened, to just let it lie and not give it too much attention. You’ve been put through a tragedy that most women will never experience so it is to be expected that you might act out due to the stress and the loss you have gone through. Right?”
“Oh God, I guess your right. I’m just so confused and stressed I can’t seem to think straight right now. So much has happened and I don’t know which way is up anymore. I guess I just read more into Major Caldwell doing her job and put her in a difficult situation.” Claire was trying to spin the situation differently in her mind but it still felt the same to her. She was attracted to Nic and couldn’t deny it.
“Look, I can be there in a day and we can get through all of this stuff together. Why…”
“No, no. Why don’t we wait until we know more about Mike? That way, you will be here when the really difficult stuff happens, you know? Mike’s family and the funeral. I’m sure his mom is going to want to make all the arrangements and I am going to need someone in my court when she gets here. Okay?” Claire interrupted, hoping that her friend would give her a little time to clear her mind before the real issues arrived.
“Sure, but promise me you will call if anything, and I mean anything, happens.”
“I promise, and thanks again for listening and being the voice of reason. I don’t know what I would do without you, Jordan.”
“Sure you do. You would drive on just like you are now. Just a little faster, that’s all. I love you, hon, and make sure you kiss Grace for me and tell her Aunty Jordan can’t wait to see her. Okay?”
“Sure. See you soon.”
Claire rolled over, putting the phone back on Mike’s side of the bed and laid her head on his pillow. His scent had long evaporated from the pillowcase, not that Claire ever felt the need for his scent. She did find it somewhat relaxing to know that Grace had a father that loved her and he was always a good husband, at least in the ways that mattered to her. No, she was wrong. She would miss Mike, his strength, his kindness, and his friendship. But now she had to find her own strength, a strength that she hadn’t had to draw upon for some time. In a crisis of faith or loss, people either stepped up and met the challenge or they collapsed in its wake. Claire knew she had to rise up out of it and step up boldly meeting it head on, not only for her sake but for her daughter’s as well.
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
Nic could feel the heat of the body next to hers. The slender brunette lay there panting from the lust that had ensued just moments earlier. Nic trembled from the orgasm rolling through her. Yet, even as the final tremors subsided, she wanted more. More tension. More pressure. She rolled toward the back that was exposed to her and moved her hips to make contact with the woman’s smooth, firm ass. Nic gasped as her nipples raked her companion’s back and instantly hardened again. She ran her tongue along the brunette’s neck, enjoying the sweet taste of lust disguised as sweat. Her muscles tensed in a shudder of anticipation. She ran her hand over a narrow shoulder and down an arm that felt slight compared with her own.
Inhaling the scent of clean h
air and hot skin, Nic willed herself to remember every moment as if it would be her last with this exotic stranger. Her companion’s fingers tightened and she undulated against Nic’s hips, moaning softly. Nic started to feel the familiar tingle of another orgasm and, slipping free of the woman’s grasp, she grabbed the hips in front of her and began to grind slowly into them, rubbing her already hardened clit into the firm ass. Her nipples added more fuel to the fire as they rubbed against her sexy partner’s back. Her breathing started to quicken and she knew it would only be a matter of seconds before she came again. She wanted to prolong this feeling as long as she could, but her body wanted something else.
Nic heard gasps as the woman pushed harder against her, brown hair thrown back onto her shoulder. The woman was begging for release, each plea more insistent. Reaching around her, Nic grasped her nipples and gently tugged them into erect points. Nic slid her other hand into the slick folds between her lover’s legs and entered her. The beautiful woman adjusted her legs so Nic could enter deeper, and as she slid her fingers in as deep as she could she felt her hand being pushed even further.
“Hard baby, I want you to fuck me harder.” The silky voice commanded as she helped Nic work her hand in and out of her wet pussy.
“That’s it baby. Oh god you’re gonna make me come again.”
Nic felt her quiver as an orgasm formed. Her own body reacted, beginning its own orgasmic dance with her companion’s. She worked her hips harder, and felt Claire reach between them and stroke her clit, then slide her hand between her legs and enter Nic swiftly.
Spreading her legs, she accepted the long thrusts and prolonged her orgasm a few moments longer before turning away from the woman she had just made love with.
A buzzing broke through the sounds of their labored breathing and continued to demand attention until, finally, Nic pressed her head into the pillows to kill its incessant scream and reached for the alarm clock.
God, it was just a dream, another Goddamn dream. This time it felt so real, so fulfilling. She had dreamt of Claire for nights and the outcome was always the same- a gut wrenching orgasm that left her both satisfied and aching for the real thing.
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Nic had opted not to see Claire after their last encounter, afraid of the embarrassment that it would bring them and the unanswered urges it would cause. She asked the sergeant to call to find out if Claire needed anything and to let her know that there were no new developments. It was all the Major could do not to stop by and see her or pick up the phone and talk to Claire. Instead, she mailed the forms they had never gotten around to, with a Post-em telling Claire to call if she needed help with them. She knew she was torturing herself thinking about Claire, but she couldn’t control her dreams. She stayed later at the office using the excuse that she was cleaning up paperwork. She was even working out at the gym for two hours instead of one so that she was exhausted when she got home. Even riding her motorcycle was offering no relief to the face she saw every time she closed her eyes. She had it bad and she knew it, but she also knew no good could come from it.
Swinging her feet to the floor Nic rested her head in her hands and tried to fend off the approaching headache. The stress was getting to her and there was little she could do right now to fix things for herself or for Claire. Finding Mike’s body was paramount to getting out of this situation with Claire. When they could close this chapter, Claire would move out of base housing and be on her way, and Nic would be back focusing on another family in their hour of crisis. She cursed herself for letting the Priest talk her into taking on Captain Monroe’s family personally. She knew better than to become personally involved. She limped to the shower and waited until it had time to warm up to its hotter than hot temperature, just the way she liked it. She slid into the pulsating jets and she leaned her head back into them to try and relieve some of the tension that had settled into her neck and shoulders from the headache. She knew she was going to have to try a different approach to forget Claire. Perhaps it was time for some company to take her mind off her problems. The weekend was coming and she deserved a little time away from the base. Maybe she would drive into San Diego and hit up a gay bar?
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
Claire heard the knocking at the door and rolled over to see what time it was. Geez, 6:30 in the morning? What idiot would be knocking at my door at this hour? Grabbing her robe, she headed for the front door and looked through the peephole.
“Jordan!” she yelled as she unlocked the door and hugged her friend. “What the heck are you doing here?” The two friends hugged until a little voice interrupted them.
“Mommy, what you doing?” Grace asked, still sleepy and rubbing her eyes.
“Awww, honey, did Aunty Jordan wake you up?”
“Yep.”
“Aw, I’m sorry. Come here sweetie and let me take a look at you and then you and me can cuddle on the couch while mommy makes us some breakfast. Okay?”
Nodding, Grace raised her arms as Jordan dropped her bags inside of the house. Turning to Claire she stuck her tongue out and said, “See, she wants her Auntie Jor. Oh and I’ll take waffles. Are waffles okay with you, Grace?” Jordan looked down at her goddaughter and laughed when the small child perked up.
“Yeah, waffles. My favorite.”
“Good. Let’s sit down and let me look at you. It seems like years since I’ve seen you, Grace. Look how big you’ve gotten. How old are you again?”
Raising three fingers, Grace smiled and counted off her fingers.
“Wow, you really have gotten older, haven’t you?” Jordan said. Grace and Jordan babbled on the couch as Claire started the coffee and looked for the waffle iron. She chuckled as she thought about her friend showing up unannounced, knowing that it had probably taken Jordan hours to find a flight. Jordan always knew how to read Claire and this time was no exception. If truth be told, Claire was glad her best friend had shown up without having to be asked. She needed someone, and right now she couldn’t think of anyone she wanted around more than Jordan. Well maybe a tall, roguishly good-looking female officer would be nice, too, but Nic was exactly why she was glad Jordan had shown up. Her friend would help her put things into perspective and keep them there.
“Here you go, morning glory,” Claire said as she passed the hot mug of coffee to her overly chipper friend. “Next time how about a little notice?”
“If I had told you I was coming, you would have just told me not to, and I could tell by your tone the other night that you needed someone. We both know whom that someone might turn out to be if you’re not careful. Right?” She lifted her eyebrows and winked. “Besides, I have tons of personal time stocked up at work, so I just left Carol a message and told her not to expect me for a while. They know how hard I work the rest of the year so they can cut me some slack.”
“Well I just don’t want you to get into any hot water over me. I would have called you when we found something out about Mike.”
“I know, sweetie.” She clasped Claire’s hand and looked over at Grace. “Besides, it gives me a chance to spend time with my only goddaughter slash niece. Right, honey? You want to spend time with Auntie Jor while mommy relaxes, don’t you?” Jordan bounced Grace on her knees. “Besides, I want to see this woman who is making you swoon before all of the stressful stuff starts and family is swarming around. So, relax. I can run interference if she shows up and give you some time to work a few things out. I am sure you have tons to do with Mike’s affairs and I can watch Grace while you take care of things. Okay?”
Claire knew Jordan was right. She hadn’t had any time to try and work through Mike’s affairs, and time was ticking on her stay in housing. Better to tie up those things that she could now so when things did get harried at least she would know she had the rest taken care of. Although Nic had said she would help with the arrangements, she hadn’t heard from her in several days. Clearly, she had decided to distance herself. Although Claire had to admit she was disappointed, she certainly couldn’t
blame Nic for it.
“You’re right. I could use some time to myself to get things in order. Once the families get here it will be chaos at best. Thanks for coming, Jordan. I really do appreciate it, even if you did get us up way too early.” Shoving her friend with her shoulder she went back into the kitchen to work on the waffles.
CHAPTER FIFTEEN
Nic bent over and bloused her boots, putting the blousing tie under the pant leg and tucked the pants neatly above her desert combat boots. She missed the days of spit-shined black combat boots that gave her uniform that polished look. She felt like the desert boots were dirty looking and always needed a cleaning. She took pride in her appearance and it showed from the way she wore her BDUs. She liked the way she felt in her uniform, commanding and strong, and now her body was starting to feel that way, too. She entered the office vaguely aware of someone waiting off to her left.
“Father, how are you?”
“Well Nic. How are you getting along?”
“Fine, Sir. Come on back to my office. Can I get you something to drink?”
“No thanks. I just had breakfast and thought, since I was in the neighborhood, I would stop by. By the way, how is Mrs. Monroe doing? I heard that there was some sort of mix-up with Captain Monroe’s body. Is that true?” Wiping his brow with a handkerchief he took from his pocket, he followed her down the bland corridor.
“I am afraid so, Father. It seems that someone screwed up in Germany and they can’t find him. For all we know he may still be in Iraq somewhere, but no one seems to know anything.” Shaking her head at the absurdity of it all, she continued into her office, closing the door behind her.
“You don’t by any chance have a clergy member over there that you can call to see if last rites were given, do you?” she asked, hoping that the Priest could lend some much needed divine intervention on behalf of the Monroe family.
