by Sarah Markel
“I am scared, Kelly.” Alex began, staring at the wall across the room. “I got a phone call today, telling me that my fifteen year old son was calling an ambulance because my pregnant wife had collapsed and was unresponsive. I was scared because I know what kind person that boy is, and I knew that he would be a wreck because his mom was in trouble. I was scared because the whole time I was driving home, all I could think about was losing you. I’ve gone through that before, and that fear is not something I will ever overcome.” She paused for a moment, taking a deep breath to steady herself and wiping the tears from her eyes. “I know how this is going to sound, and believe me when I say I hate myself for it, but not once was I worried about the baby. I was more worried about the fact that something was wrong with the woman I love more than life itself, than I was about my unborn child. I don’t expect you to understand, but that is what I am upset about. You think that I am being overbearing because I don’t want you to lose the baby. That’s not it at all.” Alex leaned forward and tipped Kelly’s chin, placing a feather soft kiss on her lips. Looking into the eyes of the woman she loved, Alex finished her thought. “I am being overbearing because I don’t want to bury another wife.”
Kelly didn’t know what to say. She hadn’t even thought about that, and now that it was out there, she was pissed at herself even more. “I’m sorry.” she said, hanging her head again and letting the tears of shame flow. Seeing her wife cry, Alex softened. She reached out her hand and once again tipped Kelly’s lips to meet hers. They stayed that way for several moment, lips laid gently against each other, before Alex pulled back. “Don’t be sorry, baby. Just remember that you are the one I am worried about with this high blood pressure thing. I am over the moon at the prospect of having a child with you, but even if we never have another child, as long as I have you, I will be happy and content.” Kelly said nothing as she moved to straddle Alex’s lap and drape her arms over the woman’s neck. She met Alex’s eyes and sighed deeply. “As long as I do as Dr. Tanner instructed, both me and the baby will be fine. I promise to let you help me more, and if I start acting like a bitch again, just tell me. I don’t ever want to be the reason for that closed off expression on your face again.” she said before capturing Alex’s lips in a gentle, yet passionate kiss.
*****
“Thank you so much, Jessie. You have no idea how much I appreciate you.” Alex said on Monday. Jessie McGowan waved off Alex’s words with a smile. “Not a problem, Alex. I am happy to help as much as possible. As long as Kelly gets the rest she needs, for her sake and the baby’s, I will be happy. Are you sure you’re alright with just weekends and Tuesdays and Thursdays though?” Alex returned her friend’s smile and nodded. “Yeah, I don’t want to overwork you or take away from your patients, so those days are fine.” The pair sat and visited for a few moments before Jessie rounded the desk to hug Alex goodbye. “I’ll see you tomorrow. Hey, is Kelly going to be alright with me using her office?” she asked, her hand on the door knob. “She’s the one who offered it up.” Alex replied with a chuckle. Nodding, Jessie opened the door and left.
Turning to her computer, Alex typed out a memo to the residents, staff, and families, informing them of the temporary doctor change, and assuring them all that Dr. Walker would return as soon as possible. Once she finished her composition, she printed it out and took it out to her assistant. “Tina, would you please make sure that a copy of this is handed out to each of the staff. I also need you to make a copy for the residents and their families.” Handing over the memo, she made her way over to Jack. The man was normally bubbly and flamboyant, but since Alex had broken the news to him that morning, the man just looked mopey. “Jack, Dr. McGowan is going to fill in for Kelly two days a week, as well as on the weekends.” Alex sat on the corner of the man’s desk and studied him. Jack nodded at the new information and sighed heavily. “When Dr. Walker is feeling a bit better, do you think you guys could all come to dinner at the restaurant? Kyle and I have something for the baby. We were going to give it to you for Christmas, but since Dr. Walker won’t be here, we would like to do it privately.” Alex smiled at him and nodded. “I think that can be arranged.” She replied, reaching over to pat Jack on the shoulder appreciatively.
Back in her office, Alex drew up the necessary forms needed to allow Jessie to fill in for Kelly, and passed them off to Tina to have Jessie sign in the morning. After making a few business related calls, Alex conference called Angie and Andrea. Both women had been apprised over the weekend of Kelly’s condition and restrictions, and had offered to help in any way they could. Alex hadn’t figured out a schedule that worked for her at that point, but had promised to call them when she had. “Jessie agreed to fill in and can start tomorrow, so the residents are covered for medical care.” She began once both women were on the line. “Oh, good. I was a little worried that she might be too busy.” Angie said with a sigh of relief. “Honestly, so was I.” Alex replied, leaning back in her chair and propping her feet on her desk. “So here’s what I need from you two. I’m going to come in on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays for as long as I can. If Kelly has any more issues, I will cut it down more, but for now I think it will be alright. Angie, would you be willing to fill in the other two days?” When Angie agreed without hesitation, Alex moved on. “Mama, when we come over for Christmas, I don’t want Kelly doing as much as she normally does. She doesn’t want to be coddled, and she’s promised to take it easy, but she will listen to you without argument.” Alex waited a moment for her mother to respond, and when she did, she just shook her head and smiled. “Don’t you worry yourself about Kelly, I will make sure she stays calm and rested. I’m not going to risk the health of any of my children, or my grandchildren. And if Kelly gets too snappy with me, I will just have to treat her the way I did you all when you were teens.” Alex and Angie laughed in unison. After hanging up with the pair, Alex gathered her things and locked her office door. “I will be back in an hour, Tina. I’m going home for lunch.” She informed her assistant as she headed out of the building.
*****
Kelly stood in front of the refrigerator, contemplating her options. She hadn’t been nauseous since just after Thanksgiving, and she knew it was just a matter of time before morning sickness would set in. She wanted to give in to her craving-of-the-day, but was afraid that she wouldn’t make it through the preparation. What she was craving sounded disgusting, but her body was telling her to eat it anyway. “What the hell, might as well.” She muttered, reaching into the fridge to grab the eggs. Setting the carton on the counter, she quickly gathered the rest of the ingredients for her “garbage sandwich” and grabbed a plate from the cupboard. Before she could start on her little experiment, she heard the door open and Alex’s voice call out to her.
“Babe? I brought lunch.” Alex called when she walked through the door. “In the kitchen.” Kelly called out to her. Alex took off her coat and made her way in to see her wife, standing in front of the kitchen island with half of their groceries spread before her. “Did the fridge go out?” she asked curiously, placing a soft kiss on Kelly’s temple. “No,” Kelly said with a sheepish chuckle, “I have a craving and I want to try it before the mere thought of food starts sending me running for the nearest bucket.” Alex looked over the items on the counter. “Please tell me you were not planning to eat all of that in one meal.” She said, her stomach jolting at the thought. Kelly shrugged and pulled two slices of bread from the loaf. “You eat your lunch and I will eat mine.” she said, spreading a thin layer of butter on each slice of bread.
Alex watched silently for several minutes while Kelly constructed her sandwich. She stared squeamishly as Kelly spread peanut butter, mayonnaise, and grape jelly onto one side, then topped it with sliced liverwurst, a slice of bologna, two strips of bacon, avocado, tomato and pickle slices, and topped it off with a lettuce leaf and a slice of Muenster cheese. She gulped audibly when Kelly turned to the stove and set about frying an egg and sautéing sliced onions and r
ed peppers. When Kelly slid the contents of the skillet onto the top of the sandwich and placed the second slice of bread on top, Alex couldn’t stay quiet. “Kelly, baby, love of my life, and mother of my children, you cannot seriously think that will taste anywhere close to good.” Kelly shrugged and cut the sandwich in half before putting it on her plate and taking a seat on the bar stool next to Alex. “Sweetheart, I am begging you, please don’t eat that.” Alex groaned, afraid she might vomit. Kelly eyed her wife defiantly, picked up half of the sandwich, and took a big bite.
Alex felt ill. She shook her head and shivered as she suppressed the urge to run to the bathroom. She watched Kelly’s face as the woman chewed and swallowed. Kelly smacked her lips and looked down at her plate. “You know, it’s not half…” Alex pushed off her seat and stumbled out of the way when Kelly suddenly turned green and shot out of the kitchen with her hand over her mouth. Alex couldn’t help but chuckle as she happily carried Kelly’s plate to the trash and dumped the sandwich. She washed and dried the plate before setting it back on the island and putting away the debris from Kelly’s experiment. When she was finished, she took her seat and waited patiently for her wife to reappear.
“Okay, well that settles that. I should not be left alone with my cravings. I am a horrible judge of tastiness.” Kelly said a few moments later, reentering the kitchen and taking her seat next to Alex. Alex said nothing, but fought hard not to laugh. “And I don’t want to hear an I-told-you-so, either.” she added when she saw Alex’s lips twitch. Raising her hands in acquiescence, Alex shook her head, “I wouldn’t dream of it. Want some of my tacos?” she offered with a grin. Kelly smiled and took the offered taco, biting happily into it and waiting to see what her stomach would do. When the nausea didn’t come, she tucked into her food with vigor. Alex just smiled and started on her own lunch without another word.
Chapter 9
“Mama, please let me help with something, anything. I’m losing my mind doing nothing.” Kelly pleaded, for the tenth time on Christmas Eve. The days leading up to the family gathering had been relatively uneventful, except for the bickering that Alex and Kelly had done almost daily over the smallest things. Kelly had hoped that once everyone was together at Mama’s house, that she would be less on edge, but so far that hadn’t been the case. Since they had arrived a few hours earlier, Mama had magically run out of tasks by the time she got to Kelly, and Kelly was getting irritated. Sighing heavily, Andrea set down her knife and looked at the woman carefully. “Alright Kelly, you can go out and keep an eye on the kids if you want to. Abby is having trouble keeping Serenity and Anna out of the fountain.” Kelly rolled her eyes and went to get her coat.
“She’s getting mad.” Alex said when her wife went out the back door. Normally Alex didn’t help with the food prep for the next day, but this year she had decided to do so, mostly so that Kelly could rest. Alex had done her best to try and keep Kelly’s stress level down, but all of her efforts seemed to be doing just the opposite. Shaking her head in frustration, Alex set down the eggs she had been peeling and turned to her mother and sisters. “What do I do, guys? I don’t want her to stress out, but it seems like no matter how much I try, she’s either still stressed out or she’s mad at me.” Angie placed her hand gently on her sister’s shoulder. “Alex, you need to ease off. Kelly isn’t a lazy person, and this is all a big change for her. The pregnancy, the blood pressure, all of it. Just give her some time and trust her to know when enough is enough. If you try to baby and coddle her, all you’re going to do is push her away.” Alex hung her head in concession and stood up to get her coat. “I’m going to go talk to her. I’ll finish the eggs when I get back.”
Alex found Kelly carrying three year old Serenity out of the fountain and over to the swing set. She stood on the porch and watched the pair for several minutes. Kelly had a wide smile on her face and was talking animatedly with the toddler. Alex felt some of her tension dissipate at the sight. She hadn’t seen too many smiles on her wife’s face over the last couple of weeks, and it made her happy to see it again. When Serenity got tired of the swing set and started back toward the fountain again, Alex hurried down to stop her. “Where are you going?” she asked the child playfully. “Fowdin!” Serenity said excitedly, pointing toward her destination. Alex scooped the little girl up and set her on her shoulders. “Annie Awex giddy up!” she giggled happily, kicking her heels into Alex’s chest. Obligingly, Alex galloped around the yard and made her way toward Kelly by the swing set. When she reached the woman, Alex whinnied and set Serenity down on top of the slide. “You stay on the swings and slide, Serenity. The fountain will give you owies.” Serenity giggled and slid down before running around to climb up the ladder and slide again.
Alex watched the girl for a few moments, to make sure she wasn’t going to run off again, and sat in the swing next to Kelly. “How come you always get the easy job?” she asked, poking Kelly’s shoulder playfully. When the woman just glared at her, Alex tried a different approach. “Babe, don’t be mad. Everyone is just trying to make things easier on you.” Standing, Kelly stuck her hands in her pocket. “I don’t need everyone to ‘make things easier’ for me. I am a grown woman, and I am perfectly capable of helping around the house. If you all want to make it easy for me, just let me help. Chopping vegetables and peeling potatoes isn’t going to affect my blood pressure. Feeling like I am incompetent and being pushed away, however, is doing a number on it.” She turned and headed back toward the house, leaving Alex to watch Serenity.
When she stepped back into the house, Kelly shed her coat, washed her hands, and sat in front of the eggs that Alex had been working on. She felt the unease of the women around her, and glared at them all. “If you all want to say something, say it. I am going to sit here and peel these eggs, then I am going to cut and hollow them. I am done being told to ‘relax’ and ‘rest’. If I’m not going to be treated like the rest of the family, I will go home and spend Christmas with the only person who has not treated me like I’m going to explode. Myself.” Without another word, she went about her task. The other women exchanged a look and crowded around her. Wrapping their arms around her in a group hug, they all said in unison, “We’re sorry, Kelly.” When the other women went back to their tasks, Andrea took Kelly’s chin and turned the woman to look at her. “We just want you to be safe, sweetheart. None of us have dealt with this kind of complication before, and we just want you to be alright. You and little Andrea.” She added, rubbing Kelly’s stomach with a hinting grin. Kelly couldn’t help but chuckle. “Little Andrea, huh? What if it’s a boy?” Andrea eyed Kelly up and down for a moment before shaking her head. “It’s a girl. I have a feeling.” At Andrea’s words, the other women laughed. “She hasn’t been wrong yet, Kelly.” Cheyenne said. Kelly just smiled and went back to her eggs.
*****
That night, after everyone had gone to bed for the night and the Christmas presents had been hauled out and put under the tree, Alex made her way up the stairs. Kelly had gone to bed an hour earlier, and Alex was eager to hold her wife. The couple had argued earlier, which was the reason Kelly had gone to bed. Alex kicked herself as she made her way up the long staircase. She hadn’t been trying to start a fight, but she had managed to when she wouldn’t let Kelly help bring in the presents from the garage. “Goddammit Alex, I can carry a fucking box!” Kelly had yelled at her, turning on her heel and storming back into the house. When Alex had returned to the house, she had looked for her wife, only to find her in their room with the door locked. “I hope she unlocked the door.” She muttered, reaching for the door knob. When the knob turned and the door opened, Alex sighed and stepped inside the room.
She made her way to the bed, her path illuminated by the light from their bathroom. She stood beside the bed, watching her wife’s sleeping form, and felt a powerful wave of arousal and longing surge through her. It had been weeks since they had last made love, mostly because Alex had been afraid to get Kelly too worked up. That reasoning had
been the topic of many of their arguments lately, and Alex had an idea. Maybe she could get them back to civility by giving Kelly what she had been asking for. She was still leery about doing anything that would raise Kelly’s blood pressure, but she was determined to find some way to stop fighting.
Stripping off her clothes, Alex climbed naked into the bed and slid next to Kelly. She placed her hand on the woman’s hip and nuzzled her neck. When Kelly stirred, Alex whispered in her ear. “I’ve missed you, baby.” She said, playing her tongue over the small hoop in Kelly’s ear. Kelly shivered and let out a soft moan as she brought one arm up to drape behind her, cupping the back of Alex’s neck. “I’ve missed you too.” She said sleepily as Alex placed feather soft kisses down the curve of her neck. Alex slid her hand across Kelly’s stomach and pulled the woman back against her. While she nipped lightly on Kelly’s shoulder, Alex’s hand moved under her shirt to cup her breast. Playing her thumb over the hardening nipple, Alex whispered, “You’re overdressed for this occasion.” Kelly nodded and sat up, tugging the sleep shirt over her head and dropping it on the floor. She turned and laid back down, facing her wife. Tracing her finger over Alex’s lower lip, Kelly leaned in and kissed her softly. “We’ve had sex, half dressed, hundreds of times, honey, what makes this time so special?”
