by Aileen Fish
“Pardon me, Your Grace…”
Rubina turned her head, slowly. She winced with the effort. Damned nuisance this was.
“Yes, Abby?”
“There are two ladies here to see you. Should I tell them you’re not available?”
Who could possibly be coming to see her? She had no friends—sad but true. No one came to visit her. It was usually busybodies or someone Noah knew. Although, this could be a way for Damian to reach her—he probably didn’t want to get questioned further by her husband.
“No. I will come down. I can’t lay about in bed all day.”
She could—but she wouldn’t. There was far too much at stake.
“Yes, Your Grace.” Abby turned to go.
“Wait,” Rubina called to her. “Please have some refreshments brought into the sitting room, and tell our guests I will be with them shortly.”
She took a deep breath and rolled off the bed. First, she’d have to make herself presentable. Rubina sat at her vanity and gasped. She looked like death warmed over… She must be coming down with something. Perhaps she shouldn’t visit with anyone—no it might be important. Whatever malady had overcome her, she’d take the risk. This social call could very well be a life or death situation.
Rubina pinched her cheeks in an effort to bring color to her porcelain skin. She sighed when it didn’t seem to do much good. Hopefully her guests weren’t so rude as to comment upon it. Hard to say—depending on who it was. If it was some busybody—God help them. Rubina didn’t have the patience for them.
She quickly discarded her dressing robe and put on her burgundy gown. It was a good thing she’d gotten used to so little clothing choices over her years locked away or she’d have been highly irritated with Noah’s refusal to visit the dressmaker. Suggesting it had been an excuse for why she’d been so distracted. What she’d actually been doing was scanning the streets for any unsavory individuals. Paolo’s men could be lurking anywhere…
Time to go face the music…
Rubina descended the stairs and entered the sitting room. She held back her reaction to the visitors awaiting her.
“Oh, good. We were thinking you were intentionally avoiding us.” Lilliana strolled across the room and pulled her into a hug. “I don’t want you to think that we’re cross with you. I’m glad to see you alive—even if you do look rather pale. Are you feeling all right?”
“Lily.” Gemma gasped. “No need to be rude.”
Lilliana shrugged. “It’s the truth, so why not speak it?”
“I’m fine really,” Rubina reassured them. The last thing she needed was for them to start asking questions. It would lead to places she didn’t want to go. “I was resting.”
“Why didn’t you tell your maid you weren’t feeling up to company?” Lilliana asked.
Gemma glared at Lilliana.
“Don’t start, Gemma. It’s a reasonable question.”
Ruby laughed. She could tell the two women were the best of friends. She wished she could have had something similar, but it hadn’t been her fate. Lilliana had always been outspoken, and she’d liked that about her. Too bad she didn’t still live in England. It would be nice to call her a friend—if she got past her supposed betrayal of Noah.
“I thought it might be important. No one stops in to see me,” Rubina interrupted them.
Gemma stopped to stare at her. Her mouth fell open as shock filled her green eyes. “Are you saying you’ve locked yourself away in this mausoleum and haven’t gone out to socialize once since you returned?”
Rubina paused. How to answer that? With the truth? “I went out to visit my brother.”
“That is just…wrong.” Lilliana frowned. “What is going on inside of Noah’s head?”
“Don’t be hard on him. It’s not been an easy month.”
Rubina didn’t want them to think badly of Noah. None of the tension between them was his fault. He was only reacting to what she wanted him to believe.
One of the maids pushed in a cart with tea and little cakes. The smell filled Rubina’s nose, and she swallowed back bile that rose up her throat. She quickly covered her nose to block the offending odor… What the hell had they put in those foul cakes?
“Will there be anything else, Your Grace?”
She shook her head. The maid curtsied and left the room.
Rubina wanted to order the cakes removed, but Lilliana was already picking one up and popping it in her mouth. Gemma looked over at them warily.
“I think I will pass on the cake,” she said. “Just tea for me.”
“More for me,” Lilliana piped in. “They are delicious.” She turned to Rubina and asked, “You want one.”
She waved it around in her vicinity just enough for he to get a good whiff of it—and send Rubina running in the opposite direction. She stopped by a nearby vase and lost what little contents remained in her stomach. The cake smelled so sickeningly sweet…
“Oh dear,” Gemma stated. “How far along are you dear?”
Sweat dripped down her forehead. What was wrong with her?
“What?”
Gemma didn’t make sense. Far along for what?
She tilted her head and studied Rubina.
“These things happen you know. There is no reason to be embarrassed. They say it only happens in the mornings, but they are wrong. It has hit me at all times of the day and sometimes the most innocent smells hit me hard.” She turned toward Lilliana. “Why don’t you carry the tray of cakes out of the room? They are a bit much for her weak stomach at the moment.”
Yes. Yes, they were. How did she know? They were horrid little pieces of square monstrosities. She’d have to order cook to never make them again. Her stomach didn’t react well to them at all.
“Oh, you poor thing. Why didn’t you say something? I’d never have put them anywhere near you. When I was pregnant with William, I couldn’t stand to be around eggs. I had to make cook promise not to make any for months.” Lilliana picked up the tray and left the room.
“What is she talking about?” Rubina asked Gemma.
They were talking nonsense. What did eggs have to do with anything she wasn’t pregnant…was she?
“Oh, you didn’t know did you?” Gemma patted her on the arm. “Have you noticed any other signs?”
“Signs?”
This was all so confusing. They had to be wrong. She couldn’t be pregnant. All right, she could—but it was unlikely. She never once conceived the whole first six months of her marriage. She’d begun to wonder if she was perhaps barren…
“Do you feel tender?” Gemma leaned in and whispered, “You know, on your bosom?”
Rubina jerked back in horror. This was not something she wanted to discuss, but now that she thought about it…
“I can’t be…”
“Are you sure?” Gemma asked. “You and Noah haven’t…”
“No, no, no. We are not going there.” Rubina paced. “Yes, of course we have, but this just…” She stopped as a horrified thought entered her mind. Noah would have no reason to make love to her again. He’d achieved his goal—and in record time.
Lilliana came back in the room. The tray was no longer in her hands. She stopped suddenly and stared at Rubina. “What’s wrong?”
“She’s a bit in shock. I don’t think she realized she was you know…enceinte.” Gemma gestured toward Rubina with her head.
“You can’t tell him,” Rubina said as panic seized her. “Promise me you won’t say anything.”
“It’s not our place to tell Noah anything.” Gemma frowned. “This is news that should come from you, but why don’t you want him to know?”
Noah would distance himself even further from her if he knew she was carrying his child. This was what he wanted. He didn’t really want her anymore. It was her fault—she’d made him hate her. After he made love to her, he practically ran away from her. He no longer held her afterward—it was an act of procreation. Even if it was hotter and more wild than it
had ever been… She didn’t want to give up the only reason she had to hold or touch her husband. He couldn’t know yet. She’d tell him when she had no other choice.
“It’s too soon…” What could she tell them that would get them to agree? “I don’t want to…” She waved her hands wildly. “You know…”
Gemma smiled. “I think I understand. Nothing is guaranteed, and you want to be sure before you tell him.”
Rubina nodded. “Yes. That’s it.”
Noah would have expectations, and he’d get even worse with his dictations too. This baby—or the idea of it—was the only thing he clung to. She’d destroyed his love for her. It had been a difficult thing to do. No one—except maybe Liam—knew how he felt about family. He’d lost everyone he loved far too young. This child would be his only remaining link to having that back. Rubina was just the vessel to give it to him.
“Don’t worry, your secret is safe with us,” Lilliana reassured her. Gemma nodded in agreement.
“What secret?”
Rubina froze. How much had Noah overheard?
Gemma turned and smiled. “Noah, how good of you to come and see us while we’re here. I thought you’d be too busy to bother.”
Noah frowned. “I was just coming in to tell Ruby I have some things to take care of and I wouldn’t be home for dinner. I had no idea you or Lilliana were here.”
Lilliana pouted. “So you’re going to run away and not even visit for a little while?”
These two were a tag team of distraction. Rubina had never been so grateful in her life. They had effectively changed the subject of any kind of secret. Maybe Noah hadn’t heard what they’d been discussing. She could only hope…
He shook his head. “No. Now tell me what you three are hiding?”
No such luck.
Lilliana sighed. “If you must know, Rubina was telling us how you haven’t allowed her to socialize at all. I mean look at her? Has she even seen sun in days? Do you keep her locked up in her room all the time?”
If she’d been talking about Paolo that would have hit the mark.
“Don’t be ridiculous. Rubina can come and go as she pleases.”
It was time for Rubina to steer him in a different direction. “In these rags?’ She held up the skirt of her burgundy gown. “I wouldn’t want the ton to think you mistreat me.”
Gemma turned and studied her dress and continued where Rubina left off. “She does have a point. Why haven’t you taken her to Madame Roussard’s?”
“Ah, the secret isn’t much of one now is it?” Noah smiled. “That is the other thing I came to tell you. I’ve arranged for Madame and her assistant to come by today and fit you for a brand new trousseau. Perhaps Lilliana and Gemma can help you choose some new gowns. Get whatever you want. Don’t worry about the expense.”
“Truly?” Rubina raised an eyebrow. “You’re not saying that because we’ve guilted you into it?”
Noah grinned. “I would have done it sooner, but it slipped my mind.”
Rubina didn’t know what to make of his attitude—he was pleasant. Perhaps it was because his friends were visiting. Maybe he didn’t want them to know how strained their relationship had become. If so, she’d willingly play the game for him. She didn’t want to cause him any more undo heartache.
“Oh, this is going to be wonderful.” Lilliana clapped her hands together. “I haven’t gotten any new gowns in forever. Do you think she’d measure us all?”
Noah tilted his head and frowned. “Tell her to charge whatever the cost to my account—for the inconvenience. Tell her your own husbands can pay for your gowns. They can very well afford it.”
“I’m going to pass for now. I’m going to need larger gowns soon. I might as well wait,” Gemma said.
Noah smiled. “Liam told me your good news. Congratulations.” He leaned down and kissed her cheek. “You will make a wonderful mother.”
Rubina turned and stared at her. That is what she’d meant earlier. She’d not put two and two together. Her mind wasn’t functioning as it normally did.
“Thank you.” Gemma smiled. “One day you’ll make a wonderful father too.”
Noah’s eyes grew distant at her words. Maybe he was remembering that she’d be the child’s mother—or he believed he’d be raising their child on his own. Whatever the reason, Rubina didn’t like it. She would never abandon her child. Her hand hovered above her stomach—Noah couldn’t know yet. If she gave him any signs, she’d lose him entirely. She wasn’t ready to let him go. Rubina let her hand fall back to her side.
“One day I may be lucky enough to have a child. For now, I will leave parenthood to you and Liam.” He smiled, but it didn’t reach his eyes. “Now I must say goodbye. Enjoy your time with the dressmaker.”
He turned on his heels and left the room.
He took her heart with him.
“All right, spill it. What is really going on between you two?” Gemma demanded.
Rubina turned to stare at her. “I’m afraid my husband no longer loves me, and I’m afraid it’s very much my fault.”
She burst into tears and ran from the room. Gemma and Lilliana could deal with Madame Roussard when she arrived. Rubina just couldn’t handle any more company.
Chapter Eleven
The women were acting strange. Noah couldn’t think about what that little scene had meant. He’d started the process; he needed to court his wife. He hoped his actions wouldn’t prove foolish. Love shouldn’t be so damned hard.
He scrubbed his hand over his face.
Thinking about the difficulties life had thrown him wouldn’t get him anywhere. There were plans to be made. If he had any hope of winning Rubina’s love again, he had to stop letting his thoughts drift down paths it shouldn’t. Whatever had driven her away before—he’d do everything in his power to prevent it this time around. It was time to start considering it the gift it was. He had his wife back. For now, that was enough. Time was finally on his side. She wouldn’t be running off until she gave him an heir.
Arranging for Madame Roussard to do a fitting in the comfort of their home was just the beginning. Maybe, with new dresses, he could coax her out of the townhouse and attend a few social functions. The first would be Gemma’s dinner party. They appeared to be getting along, so Rubina would be less likely to object to attending. Then, after a while, they could start accepting offers to balls and soirees. Rubina used to be a social butterfly. Something was—different. Noah couldn’t pinpoint it, but she seemed to be more content staying inside. The only time she’d willingly left was to go see her brother.
Another thing he must deal with. Damian hadn’t been by. This secrecy between Rubina and her brother was irritating him. He had to know what they were hiding. So he had one very important errand on his list—someone who could help him get to the bottom of it all.
The carriage stopped outside a jewelry shop. Noah stepped out and walked inside. One of the first errands on his list—ladies loved jewelry right?
“Hello, Your Grace. May I help you.”
Noah nodded at the jeweler. He knew him rather well. It was the establishment he’d purchased all of Rubina’s gifts before. The benefit of having a standing account with them gave him superior service. As long as he paid his bills, the jeweler’s eyes lit up when he walked in. The last item he’d purchased was Pearla’s engagement ring. He hadn’t expected to return to purchase gifts for Rubina. It was odd, but good.
“I need to commission something special for my wife.”
Noah could almost see the excitement twinkle from his eyes. A special commission would garner a hefty sum, but his wife was worth it. Nothing was too good for her.
“What did you have in mind?”
Noah explained what he wanted for Rubina. It was part of his big surprise. One that would take a lot of secrecy and planning—but he hoped in the end it would prove worth it. This was his whole life he was fighting for. He loved Rubina more than words could explain.
“Do you t
hink it is possible?”
“Yes. It is very much possible. How soon would you require it?”
Noah thought about it. How to put a time limit on winning his wife back? This could tip the scales in his favor, but it was hard to tell. He could only hope.
“Can you have it ready in two weeks?”
“Certainly, Your Grace.”
“Good.” Noah smiled. “Now I’d like to look at your selection of necklaces.”
“Did you have something in mind?”
“Rubies.”
“I have just the thing.” The man walked over to a safe, pulled out a black box, and then brought it back to Noah. “These were recently finished.”
Inside, lying against black velvet, was a ruby pendant shaped like a teardrop. It was flanked by brilliant white diamonds trailing all the way to the clasp, a matching pair of ear bobs were nestled next to it.
“It’s perfect.” Noah gestured toward it. “Wrap it up. I would like to take it with me today.”
“Certainly.” The jeweler nodded.
Noah picked up the wrapped package and tucked it under his arm for safe keeping. “Let me know when my other item is ready.”
“Yes, Your Grace.”
Noah nodded and stepped out of the shop. One of his stops wasn’t going to be as pleasant. It would take place in a seedier part of the town. Not a good idea to bring an expensive necklace with him. He went to his carriage and told his drive to take him to his club. He could put it in the lockbox there until he was ready to go home.
It didn’t seem to take long before the carriage was stopping once again. Noah hopped out of the carriage and headed into Whites. He was immediately greeted by one of the club owners.
