by Nikki Clarke
Amina rises over me and sinks down onto my length with a splash. If possible, the feeling is better than before. Our previous lovemaking has softened her, causing her to cradle me in an even tighter embrace. As she begins to rise and fall down onto my cock, I relinquish myself to her movements, letting her take all that she needs. She is my heart. My beat. I could never deny her.
Chapter 25
Amina
“Mm—ouch!”
My first thing in the morning stretch is accompanied by an achy tightening in my inner thighs and ass. Between my legs, my pussy feels warm.The lips are tender and puffy against my thighs.
Last night was great. The upside to having my horny take over is that I have an extremely well endowed Lyqa man who can go all night if I want him to. The down side of my horny take over is that I have an extremely well endowed Lyqa man who can go all night if I want him to. Then once that horny high comes down, I feel every place he’s been. Every single delicious place.
“Are you very sore?”
I sit up to see Kwarq at the edge of the bed. He’s dressed and has probably been up for hours. He always gets up before me, and I always sleep late. I can’t help it. I’m tired. Kwarq says it’s the babies, and it probably is. Although I would argue that today’s late rising is courtesy of the Grade A dickdown I got last night.
Kwarq’s face is pulled down in concern.
“I feel amazing. I don’t mind the soreness. I like it. In fact, if you’re not busy now…”
I let my suggestion trail off, and Kwarq’s eyes flare, the yellow flickering brightly. He stands from his perch at the edge of the bed and pulls the light tunic he’s wearing over his head before tossing it to the floor. He shoves his lounge pants down his hips, and I suck in a breath when his erection comes springing up in front of him, thick and pointed right at me. I still can’t believe I take all of that.
Kwarq crawls up the bed to me, his face determined and fierce. I lean back when he stretches his long, hard body over mine, parting my legs automatically so he can settle between them. He presses into me in one, steady motion, filling me completely and coming to rest at my cervix.
“Oh, my lehti.”
“Oh, my lehti.”
Our synchronized declarations pass sweetly between us. Kwarq’s blazing, yellow eyes hold mine as he withdraws from my body and slowly eases back in, pushing through with steady determination.
This is the calmest we’ve ever made love. Yet, despite his gentle movements, I’m more on edge than I’ve ever been. My orgasm pulses behind my clit where the thick head of Kwarq’s cock drags lazily at my sensitive walls. I know it’s going to be intense before it even hits me. Kwarq, ever in tune to my body, slams forward, allowing me to catch it just as it peaks, and I tumble into a volcano of pleasure. It flows hotly beneath my skin, making it hard to do anything but tremble in its wake.
Kwarq thrusts deeply a few more times and then he, too, freezes. His head is buried in my hair. I hear a low rumbling moan just as he stretches me and begins to pulse, bathing me with his release.
“I thought we could go to your home today.”
I’m just pulling another single strap dress up my body. I’ve come to love the simplicity of Lyqa fashion. While I was asleep, Kwarq purchased several of the simple dresses for me. The one I’m wearing today is in a bright coral color. Kwarq has explained that the fabric is infused with various supplements to keep me comfortable and help me through my pregnancy. It doesn’t hurt that they are also really beautiful.
I’m humming a popular Lyqa song we heard on the radio the other day when Kwarq makes his announcement. I pause, unsure if I heard him correctly.
“My home? Like Earth?”
“Yes, Earth. I still have the transport arranged, and I said I would take you.”
He dressed while I was in the shower. I finish pulling on my dress with shaking hands. He wants to take me home now? Is something wrong?
“Oh, I didn’t think we were going anymore.”
Kwarq frowns and comes to stand in front of me.
“Lehti, I said I would take you home. I would not go back on my word.”
I don’t care about his word. I care about him trying to send me home all of a sudden. Is it because I’m no longer at risk in the pregnancy? Did I miss something? If he thinks I want to leave him, I can easily disabuse him of that notion.
“It’s okay. I don’t want to go now.”
Kwarq smiles and cradles my cheek in his palm.
“I would feel more comfortable if you went home before deciding to stay.”
Oh, okay. And here I thought me staying was a foregone conclusion.
“Kwarq, I thought things were going well. I thought you wanted me to stay with you.” My stomach flutters, and it’s not the babies. This feeling is more like the urge to scream and puke at the same time. I don’t know what could have happened since a half hour ago. Was it my reaction to the leht juju? Is my tendency to freak out about our cultural differences too much for him?
Kwarq’s expression is patient as I silently panic. He pulls me against him, resting his chin into my cloud of hair and sighing deeply.
“You were never meant to stay this long, lehti. As much as I have loved having you here with me, I do not think it is a good idea that you just vanish from your home planet. What about your family? Your parents? It has been over two months on Earth. Your people will expect you back at some point.”
Oh. My. God. My family. I haven’t even thought about my mother or sisters since I’ve been here. Between the unexpectedly long resting spells and just enjoying being with Kwarq, it hasn’t even occurred to me that I basically left my home in the middle of the night and never returned. My job probably called my mother, who’s my emergency contact, when I stopped showing up for work. My family probably thinks I’ve been kidnapped or I’m dead.
Kwarq’s right. I have to go back if just to let my family know I’m okay and alive. I’ll have to explain to them how I’m showing up a month later looking almost nine months pregnant, but I’ll figure that out later. I need to get home. Just thinking of my mother crying herself to sleep wondering what’s happened to me makes me feel awful.
Still, that doesn’t explain why Kwarq so suddenly wants to get me back to Earth. And why he’s acting like I’m not coming back. I’m coming back. Maybe he’s just worried I’ll get too far along and it will be even longer before I can get home to see my family.
“I didn’t even think about my family. I feel so bad. I should visit and let them know I’m okay. When do you want to leave?”
Kwarq nods and he almost appears relieved. The unease I’ve managed to explain away comes back full force. Why is he acting like I’m not coming back?
Kwarq says we’re leaving within the hour. Once it’s decided, it takes me almost the entire time to get ready. Most of that time is spent lolly-gagging. I know I have to go, but I don’t want to. It’s only when Kwarq comes to his apartments to ask if I am ready for the tenth time that I finally start getting ready for real. I promise to be ready in ten minutes, and he leaves me to prepare.
I don’t actually have anything to pack. I came to Lyqa in a pair of jeans and a t-shirt, neither of which fit me anymore. I didn’t even bring my purse. I left it at Kwarq’s apartment. A apart of me wants to be petty and pack all of the stuff I’ve acquired since I’ve been here, just to see if Kwarq objects, but another part of me is too scared. What if he’s just like, “let me help you with your bags?”
I give up on the idea of the petty pack. Kwarq’s suggestion that I return home is the responsible thing to do. He didn’t actually say he wanted me to stay there, I remind myself. I’m just doing what I always do and reading too much into things.
I leave his apartments and make my way to the front of the house. I can hear Kwarq’s voice sounding out of the living room. I can’t tell who he’s talking to, but it’s clear whatever he’s saying is serious. He sounds distressed.
“I would not have chosen her fo
r myself. She holds not even a candle to you. To your beauty and intelligence. She is not who I want, you know that!”
My first thought is that Kwarq is always so extra. His exclamation is urgent but remorseful. He sounds so sad. It takes a moment for me to realize what he said. My heart trips. I don’t have to wonder if he’s talking about me. I know he is. I stop in the hall, holding my breath so no one hears me. This is not the time to get busted by Lyqa spidey hearing.
“If she wasn’t your most treasured beat, would we have had a chance?”
“If I’d never passed her on the street, I would still be your’s. You know our hearts are bound. I can’t stop it. Help me, I can’t stop it!”
“Oh, my love, we may not be able to have a life, but we will always have our love. Go to her. Do what you must.”
“I will go, but she will never replace you. You are my true heart’s beat.”
They are speaking in Lyqa. The translator Kwarq got me automatically translates their words so I perceive them as English. This is why the language seems so dramatic. I’ve only heard the person he’s speaking to once, but it would be hard to forget the breathy, musical voice. Li’aht is here, and now I know why Kwarq wants me to leave.
Kwarq sounds completely helpless. The pain in his voice is so unmistakable that it almost overrides the sharp stab of betrayal I feel. All this time he’s been lying to me. Everything he’s ever said about loving and protecting me has only been because of the leht.
I don’t realize I’m crying until I feel the tears begin to fall onto my chest. The shuffling of clothes and feet let me know that someone is coming. I hurry back the way I came until I get to the guest restroom just off the foyer. I manage to close the door just as I see a flash of white cloth come into view.
“Lehti, are you okay?”
I roll my eyes at that useless endearment. Lehti my ass. Apparently, all I am is a roadblock to his “true” heart. Still, I have to clear my throat before I can answer without sounding like I’m crying.
“I’m ready to leave. I’ll be out in a moment.”
Kwarq doesn’t respond right away, and I don’t move until I hear him shift away from the door. Only then do I sag against the sink, unable any longer to hold back the anguish I’m feeling. I never should have believed him.
If I’m honest with myself, Kwarq has never tried to deny that his attraction to me is because of the leht. He basically lives his entire life by the dictates of the leht. Everything he’s done so far has been because he has to do it, because I’m his lehti. The man unquestioningly stranded himself on a hostile alien planet just to fulfill his stupid first heart’s purpose. As I try my best to muffle the sounds of my sobs, I have to face the fact that this hasn’t been the grand love story I’ve been imagining.
It takes me longer than I would like to gather myself. I keep telling myself that it hasn’t been long enough for me to feel the way I do. I’m not Lyqa. Kwarq may be bound by the dictates of his heart, but I’m smarter than this. I should have been smarter than this.
I push away the pain that makes me want to fold myself into a ball on the floor of the bathroom. Instead, I splash my face with water, wincing when I catch my reflection and see that my eyes are too puffy to do anything about. I shrug at my reflection. Who cares anymore. I’ll just blame it on the one thing that’s real about this whole experience.
Kwarq
I wait patiently outside of the door of the bathroom, but I can smell Amina’s sadness from here. It is not just sadness. It’s anguish. My first heart aches in chorus with her’s, and I have to grip the wall to keep from bursting through the door to find out what’s wrong.
When the door finally slides open, I notice several things right away, and I don’t need Lyqa senses to see them.
Her eyes are red and puffy. Even beneath her dark brown skin, the capillaries are mottled and the rims of her rounded nostrils are swollen. She’s been crying. She must have been very careful to remain quiet because I didn’t hear her even though I was standing just outside of the door. My heart aches with the knowledge that she’s been suffering alone.
“Lehti, what is wrong?”
My tone is careful. It must be something serious if it has managed to upset her this much. I would know what it is, so I can fix it.
“Oh, nothing. It’s just the—babies. You know how it is. It’s like zero to one hundred.”
She tries to sound casual, but it’s forced and insincere.
“Lehti—“
I reach out for her, but she dodges my hands, letting out a weak chuckle.
“I’m fine, Kwarq. Let’s go.”
When we get to the hall, my parents and brothers are waiting to see us off. The wave of sadness that rolls off of her is so thick that my mother flinches when Amina pulls her into a fierce hug. Her eyes begin to water, and she again blames her pregnancy before hugging my father and brothers. When my mother’s panicked gaze meets mine, I can do nothing more than shrug. I have no idea what’s happening.
“Should we hire a transport. The walk may tire you.”
She avoids my gaze. Her eyes squint in the bright, afternoon sun. She looks lovely, despite her sadness. Her skin shimmers in the sunlight.
“No. Let’s walk.”
“Are you sure, lehti?”
“I’m sure. I want to walk.”
She strolls at my side, widening the distance whenever I try to step closer to her. Finally, I give up and let her keep the space between us.
My lehti has only been out of the house a few times since she has been here, and the first time, she was shy about looking around. Now she looks at everything. She runs her hands along the leaves and feathers of plants that we pass on the road. She waves and nods to Lyqas sitting on their patios. For the short walk to the transport center, her sadness lifts some, and I hope that she is just feeling sentimental about home. I also wonder about the distance she is so obviously putting between us.
Our pod sits at the curb of the rental station when we arrive at the transport center. She lets me hand her in, and it is the most contact we have had since I found her crying in the bathroom.
As soon as she’s settled, she jerks her hand away, and turns away, her gaze focused out of her side of the window. I can’t even begin to sort through my confusion.
Amina
I ignore the tingling in my fingers when Kwarq takes my hand. The truth is, I’m too bulky to manage the pod by myself, so I have no choice but to let him help me. I’m not sorry for it though. I’ve been careful not to touch him. I don’t want to be fooled by the magnetism of the leht. I don’t want to feel that connection, knowing it isn’t real. That it’s just a force of biology.
Kwarq expertly maneuvers us to the immigration checkpoint. I’m surprised to see the same redhead from our arrival waiting in the booth. When her eyes fall on me, she breaks into a wide grin.
“Congratulations.”
I’m too caught off guard to respond, but Kwarq says something in Lyqa that my translator interprets as a type of gratitude. The woman nods and removes my wrist band, typing something into her screen before turning back to us.
“I hope you have enjoyed your stay, and best wishes on your birthing.”
I nod, but my throat feels tight. Everything is starting to feel too real. I know that in a moment, I’ll be back in Chicago like I never left. I should be happy, at least to see my family, but I can only feel like I’m losing the one thing that has ever made any sense in my life.
Chapter 26
Amina
It’s just like I remember. One moment Kwarq is warning me to brace myself, and the next, we’re hovering over Chicago. The landscape beneath us is draped in a thick, white blanket of snow. The roads show the dirty tracks of traffic. People file about like little ants on the sidewalks below. As we lower closer to the ground, I hear the deep rumble of a train nearby.
It’s surreal. Kwarq parks us at the alley behind his old apartment building. I wonder where he plans on hiding the pod, and
I’m surprised to see him pull out a regular old garage opener and press it, opening the same car port he used before.
“Uh, you know that you can’t just show up and use this garage, anymore, right? They probably think you skipped out on the apartment.”
Kwarq glances over to me. His mouth is turned up in a little smile as he maneuvers the pod into the dark, wide space.
“They don’t think this.”
Right. This man comes from a place where things like this would be free. He probably doesn’t understand that everything costs something on Earth. As a matter of fact, he’d probably get hit with a surcharge for parking an alien space craft.
“Yeah, that’s not how things work here. We’ve been gone, what, a month and a half? Two months?”
“We have.”
“Right. Well, you have to pay rent here on time. If you just leave your apartment, they will toss your belongings onto the street. I’m pretty sure that’s the case by now. For you and for me.”
I realize again that I just abandoned my life to go to Lyqa. Even though it wasn’t my intention to stay, once I thought I was happy with Kwarq, I didn’t even give my apartment, my things, my family a spare thought. Who knows how long it would have been before I realized that everything I knew was galaxies away. If I hadn’t heard Kwarq this morning, I probably would have been content on Lyqa in La-La-Land.
Kwarq doesn’t seem too concerned with my information. In fact, he seems pretty comfortable. I’m damn near bursting with guilt and hurt, and you’d think we were off on a little road trip to Wisconsin.
“Do not worry. In the time you have been at my home, I have maintained both of our residences here on Earth. When you entered your second resting period, I tendered your employment resignation and had your final compensation administered to your banking institution. Additionally, I provided funds for your building management to withdraw your monthly rental fee. I located your mother and sisters and sent them a message from your cellular phone reassuring them of your safety. I explained that you had received a once in a lifetime opportunity to travel to another country and you would be back soon. Hopefully, they were calmed by this belief.”
