“I know,” she said solemnly. “We just have so many applications… so many girls…” Her hands slid the stack of paper gently across her desk, and I saw the raw pain split open in her eyes.
Not just their pain but hers.
Larry Ocean once told me that sometimes people don’t have the luxury of being able to ask for help, which is why you help anyone you can.
For whatever reason—fear… embarrassment… pain—my sister couldn’t ask me for help. Not the way she needed to. Not the way that said helping more girls was the only thing that kept all her holes patched so she didn’t fall apart.
But I saw it in her eyes. I saw how much she needed this even if she couldn’t tell me why.
“If you can’t—”
“I can find my own place,” I interjected with a brave smile and a shrug. “I’ve been thinking about it anyway.”
Her eyes widened. “Are you sure?” The relief in her voice made my heart ache.
I wished I knew how to help her more than this, but if this was the most I could do, I’d figure out how to make it work in a heartbeat.
“Absolutely.” I nodded, tacking on a few more white lies that could be potential truths I’d have to pursue. “I think Laurel might need me to cover more hours, so I’ll be making more there. And I can ask around and see if anyone has space available. Plus, I could always stay with Gwen.”
“If you’re sure. Because if not, I don’t have to do this. I can call Mick back and tell him that we are going to hold off for a little longer,” she assured me, reaching for my hand and clasping it in hers.
Of course, my sister had asked Madison Construction to work on the house… my home up until this moment. Of course, it would be Miles responsible for tearing down my room just like he’d torn down my hopes. The proverbial nail in the coffin…
“Evie?”
Even though she’d been calling me that name for far longer, all I could remember was that Miles was the only other person in the world, aside from my siblings, who’d ever called me ‘Evie.’
“Sorry.” I laughed and stood, slinging my bag over my back. “Don’t call him. If this is what you want to do, you should. I’ve got a few weeks at least though, right?”
She nodded.
“Okay, then yeah. I’ll figure it out. The last thing I want is to be responsible for holding back your dreams when all you’ve ever done is encourage and support mine.”
When she smiled, I knew I’d made the right call.
Addy had encouraged my dreams and kept her darkness buried, so I could still believe in fairy tales. Finding my own place so she could try to keep her own pain at bay was the least I could do in return.
“Thank you.” She pulled me in for a hug, squeezing the side of my shoulders as she sagged against me.
“Love you, sis.”
There was a heavy pause. “Love you, Evie.”
When she pulled back, I saw the dark stains on the edge of her sweatshirt sleeves where she must have wiped her tears away before I could see.
“Alright, I should get set up before the whole house revolts.”
“Yes.” She laughed. “We can’t have a vinyasa emergency on our hands.”
I shook my head and giggled as I walked out of her office with a wave.
Once I was a safe several steps away, I let out a soft groan. It was a good thing I was going right into an hour of yoga after that conversation. Although, even that wasn’t going to cut through my stress tonight.
I was going to be homeless in a few weeks, and I think that justified a post-Savasna drink.
Or two.
Eve
“Another Irish Maid, Benny, please.” I slid my empty glass across the dark mahogany carved bar at the Carmel Pub with a weak smile.
Laurel liked to say the Pub felt like it had been carved out of the inside of a tree, the way every wall was lined with dark wood and the lamps and accents were green. And it smelled like peppermint, even sitting at the bar. It was almost as though it came from the wood or whatever was used to clean it, the scent pervading the air and sinking coolly into my nostrils.
“Long day?” The youngest Covington brother arched a polished eyebrow at me and picked up my glass.
Even though he was the youngest and the smallest (which wasn’t saying much) out of the three, Bennett Covington had a subtle strength to him. He was like Captain America compared to his two Hulk-ing brothers, Dex and Ace. While they might look like the more imposing of the group, especially with their tactical and security training, Benny not only could hold his own but could save the day.
“I need another job,” I grumbled.
I’d been stewing in my misfortune for the last half-hour, heading directly over here from my yoga class. The hour-long meditation had helped, but it hadn’t taken the last edge off. I knew Addy would want to check on me again, but I didn’t want to talk about it anymore. It would be okay even if, at the moment, I wasn’t.
What it came down to was simple: I needed to make more money, otherwise, I was going to have to put off my dream of owning my own yoga studio even longer. Real estate wasn’t cheap in Carmel, even if I only needed a small place, and I was so close to having enough in savings for a down payment.
“What?” He froze in the middle of making me a second cocktail. “What happened at Roasters?”
I shook my head, realizing his misunderstanding. “No. I don’t mean like that. I’m still going to work at Roasters. Well, hopefully. But I need to make more money, so I can get my own studio.”
“Wait, what happened to Blooms?” He planted his palms on the bar and stared at me, and I realized I’d started in the middle of the story with the wrong half of the equation.
Backing up, I tapped my index finger on the different knots in the wood on the bar as I outlined all the things I needed in the order I needed them.
“I need to get my own place because Addy and Zeke are expanding Blooms and they need my room. Which is totally fine. I’m totally fine about it.” I did not sound totally fine. “But that means I’ll need to make more money in order to afford to move out and get my own studio, which is why I need another job,” I finished with a huff.
When I looked up as he passed me the filled glass, I wondered if I’d even spoken coherently, judging by the pensive expression on his face. I wasn’t a big drinker. More socially than anything else. But tonight, I knew I was going to need something more than yoga to keep my thoughts from scattering and my anxiety from going through the roof.
Groaning, I reached for my second drink.
“Do you want to work here?”
The glass clattered back onto the counter. “W-What?” Now, it was my turn to gape.
“Hold that thought,” he grumbled, tossing the bar towel over his shoulder and heading for the corner where the bachelorette party was congregated. It looked like one of the girls was trying to climb over the bar, her boobs about to slide out of the top of her tube dress as she reached for the bottle of gin.
Work at the Pub?
My gaze drifted down to my drink, wondering if making them was something I could do. With the way some people ordered their coffees nowadays, it was probably easier to handle a cocktail. I’d just never really been the bar type, but it was only temporary until I bought my studio. Plus, I knew Benny. I knew this place. It wasn’t a bad option.
It wasn’t a bad option at all.
“Sorry about that.” Benny reappeared in front of me with a wry smile. “Probably not the best advertisement for a bartender position, but I could use some help on the weekends if you want.”
As if to prove his point, a large biker at one end of the bar hollered for him just as one of the drunk girls squealed at the other end.
I watched him quickly grab the man another beer before running down to the other end to see what the commotion was about.
Turns out it was a who.
My stomach twisted into a familiar knot as I saw familiar dark-sand hair pulled back in a small bun, move lik
e a sun-soaked cloud through the mass of curls, sparkles, and tiaras. A few more steps and Eli appeared first, his dark tousled hair and kind eyes fading as soon as Miles finally came into view.
It wasn’t fair to be so struck by a man who looked gorgeous even in his dirty, tattered work clothes. It wasn’t fair for his shirt to fit the way it did, pulled taut over thick, veined muscles, swollen from a full day of exertion. It wasn’t fair for his jeans to cling to his narrow hips in the way that made my mouth water. And it wasn’t fair to be the only one left wanting.
I didn’t realize I was holding my breath until it came out in a whoosh when they made it through the half-dressed ho-horde.
But as soon as his face, lit with the casual confidence of a hunter happening on willing prey, locked on mine, the small, sexy smile on his face withered, taking the remaining oxygen in my lungs with it.
I was ruining his night.
This was different than the other times when it was a planned gathering of our friends or a coffee run. He was always prepared for my presence then. Tonight, he wasn’t. Here, he wasn’t. Tonight, I’d invaded his home turf. And he wasn’t pleased.
Before I could think to turn the other way—not that it would’ve made a difference—Eli’s face broke into a warm smile and he walked over to me, bringing a scowling Miles along behind him.
“Hey, Eve.” Eli hugged me. “I would’ve brought Laurel had I known you were going to be here.” He brushed one of his dark curls out of his face.
“Don’t worry about it,” I replied with a smile. “I didn’t know I was going to be here either.”
I swore I heard Miles groan as Eli pulled out the barstool next to me and took a seat. Eli asked me a few questions about how everything at Roasters had gone while they were away as Miles stared off into the distance, listening but doing his damnedest to act like he wasn’t.
As soon as Benny delivered their first round of drinks, Miles downed his, shoved his stool back with a slight nod in Eli’s direction, and strolled to where the girls were still talking and giggling, blatantly eyeing him up.
Go for it, ladies, I snorted.
“Did you say something?” Eli looked at me.
My cheeks flushed. “Just… wondering how everything went with the move?” I recovered quickly. “Jules texted me that it was an adventure.”
“Moving always is,” he said wryly.
At that point, Benny came back over to us, he and Eli falling into a conversation about some upgrade to the bar Benny wanted to do. I heard them, but I wasn’t listening. Instead, I couldn’t stop myself from searching out Miles, watching painfully as he whispered and flirted with the whole party of women.
He never looked at me, but he knew I was watching. And the thought made the pit in my stomach even deeper. He didn’t need to prove to me what kind of woman… what kind of relationship (or lack thereof) he was looking for.
After everything that had been thrown at me today, the last thing I needed was a reminder about my apparently unrealistic expectations—or about my unrequited crush. Stress and self-doubt was a more powerful cocktail than the one in my hand, although it was the alcohol that let me indulge in the thoughts.
Was I being ridiculous about all of this? Were my expectations too high?
It wasn’t that I was saving myself for marriage per se, I mused as I chewed on my lower lip, I just wanted to feel that connection, that something special, with someone who was looking for a serious relationship.
It wasn’t like I’d asked him to ride in on a white horse for crying out loud.
But it seemed like I was destined to always either get one part or the other. Either I went on dates with good men who were seriously interested but who didn’t give me the oomph. Or I was given Miles, where our spark could have set this whole town on fire, but it was a flame that would only burn for one night before he smothered it out.
My head jerked away as I saw one of the party girls, the one with long brown hair, grab Miles’ hand that had been resting on her back and drag it down onto her ass that was barely covered by her minidress.
Swallowing down the bitter taste that rose in my throat, I pulled my glasses off and reached for the edge of my shirt to wipe them as though cleaning the lenses could erase the image from my brain. I put them back on and gasped when I saw Miles standing next to me, his green eyes vibrant like ivy—beautiful, but poisonous.
“Goodness, you are stealthy.” I let out a loud sigh, looking around for Eli who I then vaguely recalled hearing say a few minutes ago that he was going to the restroom.
“What are you doin’ here, Eve?” he demanded with a low rasp. I could hear the whiskey in his voice as he immediately turned to order another drink.
“The same thing you are,” I said as I lifted my own glass.
His eyebrow rose and his gorgeous features were slashed with a hard smile. “So, you’re wondering if you’re going to be going home with one or two very eager, very wasted girls tonight?”
“No.” I frowned, doing my best to hide my grimace by rolling my eyes. “I meant just getting a drink.”
“This isn’t the place for you,” he informed me, crossing his arms over his muscled chest. I wanted to pound my fist against it, both because he was being a jerk but more so because it still didn’t make the ache in my body go away.
“Why?” I blurted out.
“Because this is a bar, not a ball. You aren’t goin’ to find Prince Charming here, Cinder-Eve,” he drawled, his southern accent even more pronounced after a few drinks.
I shivered and crossed my legs, his lilt slipping right through the knots in my stomach and settling lower, encouraging the ache I tried to ignore.
Spinning my stool so I was face-to-face with him, I realized too late that it moved me closer to his large, hot form than I was prepared for. I took a quick glance down. His black tee was tucked in the front of his waistband, providing just enough tautness to the fabric to highlight the bricks of his abs and chest.
It might have been months, but my body remembered like it was only moments ago what it felt like to be pressed up against his hardness, the hot pulse of him bringing my own body to life.
“Really?” I sucked in an exaggerated gasp, putting a hand over my mouth as I let my eyes rapidly scan the room. “I can not believe it. I was told it was a free prince with every pint! Unbelievable.” I smacked my palm flat on the bar in mock outrage and tried to hold my giggles in. I lasted about two seconds when I caught the spark in his eyes and broke out in laughter.
What did I have to worry about any more? I already knew I was the ‘exact opposite’ of the kind of girl he wanted.
I watched anger spin like the finest silk through his body, weaving through the hard muscles and flat planes all the way up over the crisp cut of his jaw and spooled in the depths of his stare.
And even though indignation burned through my blood, it was still desire that stayed locked like marrow inside my bones. This was the last thing I needed tonight—to be reminded about how one more of my dreams was that much farther from my reach.
“You shouldn’t waste your time here, there aren’t any fairy tales on tap.” His words sliced through the buzz the alcohol had given me.
“Sorry, Groucho,” I teased with a sigh. “I couldn’t help myself. But I got it. No fairy tales and no dancing, so you’re in no danger from me.”
“I wish that were the case,” I heard him mutter underneath his breath as he grabbed the drink Benny begrudgingly returned to him.
“Take it easy tonight, Miles,” Benny warned before heading to another calling customer.
“And there definitely aren’t any princes in disguise.” With a hard smirk, Miles raised his glass to me and turned to walk away.
“Oh, don’t I know it,” I retorted, watching the hesitation in his step before he continued to walk away. Still, I called after him, “In fact, Disney should write a story about me. I kissed what looked like a handsome, man-bunned prince and he only turned out to be a croak
y, cranky frog!”
I knew he heard me even if he didn’t acknowledge. I knew he heard me, and it felt so good.
I just wished his stupid frog-ass had a few more warts or something so that it didn’t look so damn hot walking away from me.
Grunting, I adjusted my glasses and swirled the rest of my drink before taking a large swig. Before I swallowed, I realized I was about to play into his hand—to finish my drink and get out of there as quickly as possible. Checking my periphery, I let half the mouthful slide back into the glass before calmly setting it back on the counter.
Smooth, Eve.
I refused to be bullied. I refused to leave because he made me feel unwelcome. No, I sat with my spine stiffer than my cocktail and turned the opposite direction from where Miles had gone and chatted with the nice gentleman who’d taken a seat next to me; he ended up being one of the doctors that worked with Gwen.
Who said you couldn’t find a prince in a bar?
Eli returned a few minutes later, having been waylaid by the owners of one of the local vineyards to talk about putting in a new tasting room. I didn’t tell him why, but I confessed I was thinking about picking up a few hours bartending here on weekends. One conversation with Miles had completely drowned out my current predicament. He thought it was a solid idea, especially on Friday and Saturday nights when I’d be making some good money.
Before we could chat further, he apologized and excused himself to the other end of the bar where—without looking for too long—I saw that Miles, now good and well drunk, grew louder than the whole group of girls that clung to him like toilet paper on the bottom of a shoe.
Checking my phone, I smiled, pleased that I ended up staying for a good forty-five minutes after Miles tried to tell me I was wasting my time. Draining the last drops in my glass, I flagged Benny down.
“Another?” He looked at me with concern.
“No.” I laughed and shook my head. “I’m done for the night. But I wanted to tell you I thought about your suggestion.” I couldn’t stop my eyes from sliding to the other end of the bar where Miles had his arms around not one but two of the bachelorette bimbos. “If you need someone, I’d like to take the bartender position.”
Besotted: An Enemies-to-Lovers Small-town Romance (Carmel Cove Book 3) Page 4
