“Oh, ha! Ha! I’m sorry, Teach. Clumsy of me.”
“Hello, Barbie,” Katherine said with a nonchalant smile. She didn’t want any altercations at the fish fry. Jake turned defensively in his chair. Katherine could tell by his body language that if Barbie messed with her, Jake would intervene.
“Hiss,” Barbie spat. “Meow!” she called as she headed for a table filled with other Sanders clan members, who saw the incident and laughed rowdily.
Colleen pointed to her head and mouthed the word, “Nuts!”
Shelly started imitating Barbie. “Meow! Meow! Mom, why did that woman just meow like a cat?”
“Shhh, Shelly,” Margie said. “One time she saw Katz’s cats in the window.”
“Maybe she thinks I’m a crazy cat lady,” Katherine joked, trying to reduce the tension at the table. “Okay,” she said merrily. “Where’s that fireman with the fish?”
Chapter Six
The front doorbell bonged the Addams Family famous ringtone with Lurch asking “You rang?” Katherine had it installed just for the party. For fun, she thought about leaving it until Thanksgiving. She darted to open the door.
“You rang?” Mary, the party planner howled with laughter. “Brilliant!”
Mary stood outside with Bella the Russian fortune teller. Misha and the motorhome hadn’t arrived yet. Bella was dressed in a colorful purple and black striped gypsy skirt, with a black, long-sleeved peasant blouse. A purple satin sash was tied around her waist. She wore a green turban on her head with a large topaz-colored medallion in front. Her large, gold hoop earrings gleamed in the chandelier’s light. Katherine thought with a smile, She certainly looks the part.
“Come on in,” Katherine said to the two women. “Bella, I believe you wanted to set up in the parlor?”
“Yes,” Mary answered for Bella. “Hey, Katz, listen, Misha is running late but he’ll definitely be here before the cocktail hour starts.”
“That’s good to know,” Katherine said. “Because his gig takes place during the cocktail hour.”
Before stepping into the parlor, Mary admired, “I love these black lace panels with the spooky, haunted tree. How clever of you to hang them between the spandrel arches.”
“Thanks,” Katherine grinned. “I found them online. I like the orange twinkling lights, and my cats like the black Halloween cat and the bat. Oops, better not mention the bat.”
Bella flashed a gold-toothed grin and parted the panels. Walking into the parlor, she began moving an Eastlake marble-top table to the center of the room. Mary ran in to help her. Realizing the fortune teller needed a chair, Katherine slid over a velvet-covered Eastlake side chair.
“I think this will work,” she said.
“Da,” Bella said. “Spasiba.”
Mary said, “That means ‘thank you’ in Russian. I’ve picked up quite a few words.”
Bella sat down. Setting her large gypsy bag on the floor next to her, she reached in and withdrew a purple, velvet-fringed tablecloth. She draped it over the table top. Then she reached in her bag and removed a large crystal ball. She set that on the table. She said to Katherine, “Katsee, we do you fortune first.”
“Oh, that’s not necessary, really,” Katherine said, not wanting her fortune told.
Mary insisted, “Oh, Katz, it will be fun. Besides we’ve got time before the guests arrive. It won’t take but a minute.”
“I guess,” Katherine said reluctantly. She moved a nearby Eastlake side chair in front of the table and sat down.
Bella took Katherine’s right hand and turned it over. She began rubbing the lines on Katherine’s palm.
“I thought we were doing the crystal ball?” Katherine asked.
Bella brought her finger to her lips. “No speak, Katsee.”
“Oh, but that tickles,” Katherine giggled. Iris peeked around the corner and quietly watched the group.
“I see much tragedy in your family.”
Katherine became very serious and sighed. She thought, Great! This con artist has heard about the pink murder house.
Bella continued. “Death haz visited. Much unhappinezz, but three men love you.”
Katherine couldn’t remain quiet any longer, “Seriously, three? Can you tell me who they are?”
Bella answered, “We move to ze krystal ball.” She stared at it intently for a few moments, then said, “Some joy, much sadnezz, and death no ready to leave. More to come.”
Mary, who hovered nearby, gasped, “Katz, we don’t have to finish this.”
“No, I already know I’m Miss Doom-and-Gloom. Please, Bella, do go on.”
“Someone you love vill go away. You vill look … but no find.”
“Can you see who it is?” Katherine asked, worried.
“Nyet! Lost.” Bella gazed more intently at the ball and said, “Three men. One gone. Two here. One fair; one dark. Does zis mean somezink?”
Katherine put on her best poker face. She was thinking. Mark Dunn is fair-haired. Jake has dark hair. She answered, “Not thinking so, but I find this all very interesting. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’ve got a party to put on.” Katherine left her chair so abruptly that it rocked back and forth. Iris shot out in front of her, nearly tripping her in the hallway to the back office.
“Look out, Miss Siam. Are you trying to kill the hostess?”
Iris yowled loudly and reached up to be held.
“Okay, Miss Siam,” Katherine said, picking her up. She held her and gave her chin scratches. “It’s time you go upstairs and join the other cats. We don’t want you to get out when the guests arrive. Okay, precious girl?”
“Yowl,” Iris replied, lightly biting Katherine’s earlobe.
“Well, okay then.”
Katherine carried Iris upstairs to her back bedroom. Lilac and Abby were asleep in their cat cozy cube on the ornate renaissance-revival bed, while Scout and Abra were sitting on the windowsill looking out. Katherine set Iris on the floor and then left. Closing the door, she turned the key in the deadbolt lock and went back downstairs to join Colleen in the kitchen. She found Colleen helping Vicky, the Erie Hotel caterer, arrange hors d’oeuvres on a platter.
“Katz, try this,” Colleen said, handing Katherine an appetizer with layers of thinly sliced mozzarella cheese, basil leaf, and tomato, arranged on a Breton cracker.
“Oh, my God,” Katherine sighed with closed eyes. “This reminds me of our favorite wine and cheese place on 53rd Street.”
“Uh-huh,” Colleen agreed. “I forgot to compliment you earlier. I like the way you decorated the dining room,” she admired.
Katherine smiled. “The ceiling height is so tall, I asked Cokey to set up a tall ladder so I could hot glue the black crepe paper to the upper plate rail, then run it over and attach it to the cranberry glass chandelier.”
“The plastic bat is pretty cool too. I like the way it hangs from the crystal chandelier. Where did you find a black tablecloth and those sweet dishes?”
“An online Halloween party store. Colleen, I need you to help me with something.”
“Sure.”
“See those gothic-looking place cards? I need to figure out who’s sitting next to whom, and arrange the place cards around the table.”
“Well, first of all, you’ll be sitting next to Jake. I want to be sitting next to Daryl. So everyone else can grab their card and sit wherever they want,” Colleen said mischievously.
Katherine laughed, “You’re a big help! Jake suggested we do boy-girl, boy-girl. So, at the head of the table closest to the carport door I’ll put Jake. On Jake’s right, I’ll sit, which is closest to the kitchen door, in case Carson the Butler isn’t available.”
Colleen said in her best Downton Abbey Lady Mary accent, “I really think the Colfax Abbey needs another footman to serve, preferably one who looks like Tom Branson.”
“Of course, you’d say Tom Branson! Would his being Irish have anything to do with it?”
“Just sayin.’ Tom and Daryl do sort of look-
alike in a blond, green-eyed sort of way,” Colleen said with an impish grin.
Katherine giggled. “Margie will sit next to you on the right. Cokey will be at the other end of the table. Michelle will sit to Cokey’s right. Then her date, Glen, will sit on her right. Leslie and Jake’s friend, Wayne, will sit to the left of Jake.”
“What a science! Yes, boy-girl, boy-girl. I know that Mark Dunn isn’t coming, but who was the twelfth person who couldn’t come?” Colleen asked.
“Detective Linda Martin. I so wanted her to come. Since the speakeasy find, I’ve had lunch with her several times. She’s really cool. Plus she loves cats!”
“I remember her from last winter. Why can’t she come?”
“She’s lead detective on the Festival Murders case. She told me she’s working long hours interviewing lots of people.”
A middle-aged man with a crop of gray hair walked in and announced, “I’m the bartender.”
“Frank.” Katherine recognized him. “I thought you worked at the diner?”
“Yeppers, but I bartend on the weekends for the Erie Hotel. Where do you want me to set up the bar?” he asked, struggling with a large carton of wine, beer, and liquor bottles.
“Follow me,” Katherine said, walking into the decorated living room. The Victorian furniture had been pushed back against the walls, so there was room in the middle for guests to mingle. The fireplace mantel held six pottery pumpkins with tea lights inside. A large, black flowered wreath was placed on a hook above the mirror. Katherine pointed to a sideboard with a mottled pink marble-top. “How about there?”
“Looks mighty fancy to me,” Frank said with an admiring glance.
“Kindly suggestion. If you spill anything, could you quickly wipe it up? The marble is more forgiving than the wood. I’ve learned that the hard way,” Katherine said.
“Yeppers, nothin’ like leavin’ a big ugly ring when you set a drink down.”
“Thanks, really appreciate it,” Katherine said, leaving. She headed back to the kitchen to talk to Colleen. Colleen was busy sampling another appetizer.
“Busted,” Colleen said, with a miniature puffed pastry in her mouth. “These are to die for.”
The caterer smiled and handed Katherine one. “Vicky, these look wonderful,” Katherine said, as she bit into it. The pastry exploded with cheese and broccoli cascading down her blouse.
Colleen smirked, “Just like old times. Got any seltzer?”
Katherine grabbed a washrag and dabbed at the stain. “Oh, that will have to do.” She then grabbed Colleen’s arm. “Okay, it’s your turn to see the fortune teller.”
Colleen protested mildly. “I guess, but you know that woman is a fraud, right? She’s a cold reader. She asks you a question, then reads your body language for the answer.”
“Oh, forget that. Just have fun with it. I’ll wait outside.”
“No, I insist you stay in the room with me!” Colleen demanded.
Katherine and Colleen headed for the dining room, but caught Jake in the atrium. Jake wore a huge grin.
Katherine observed, “You look like the cat that swallowed the canary. What gives?”
Jake shrugged, “Nothing. Madame Bella just gave me the best news.”
“Really?” Katherine said incredulously, not thinking Jake would be one to have his fortune told. Jake grabbed her and kissed her cheek. The doorbell sounded, “You rang?” “I’ll get it,” he said, moving away.
“I wonder what she told him,” Colleen kidded.
“Madame Bella,” Katherine let out a laugh. “Jake’s always naming things.”
When Colleen and Katherine walked into the parlor, Bella was peering into a hand mirror, adjusting the turban on her head. When she saw the two friends, she quickly put the mirror in her bag.
“Your turn, Colleen. I was her first victim.”
Colleen sat down on the Eastlake side chair. Bella began reading Colleen’s palm. Colleen was too busy looking out the large picture window at Daryl, who had just parked and was getting out of his car. She wasn’t paying attention to Bella’s predictions until Bella announced, “You make big move – many miles – to join your loved one.”
Startled, Colleen snapped out of her Daryl-induced trance. “Seriously?” she asked, flipping her hair back defiantly. “Joining Mario? That will be the day!” She got up abruptly, and almost tripped over the threshold rushing to the door to greet Daryl.
In the meantime, Wayne Watson and Leslie had arrived and were talking to Jake. Katherine walked over to guide them to the living room.
“I’m so glad you came. Can I get you a drink?” Katherine asked, playing the part of a perfect hostess.
Leslie said in her quiet voice, “I’ll have a gin and tonic.” Wayne said, “I’m driving, so I’ll have a Coke.”
Katherine nodded toward Frank. “Well guys, that gentleman standing over there will fix you right up.” She led them over to the bar.
Frank said, “I heard it! One gin and tonic, one Coke, coming your way. Ms. Kendall, what do you want?”
“I’m good,” she said, then to Wayne, “How did you two meet? Do you both share the metal detecting hobby?”
Leslie answered, “We met last July in San Diego at Comic Con.”
“Yeah,” Wayne said, “We were surprised we’re both from the same city.”
“That’s so cool,” Katherine said, leaving them to rejoin Jake at the front door.
When Daryl came in, he said hello to Jake and Katherine, then when he saw Colleen, his face lit up like a Christmas tree.
“Hi, Colleen,” he said cheerfully. Colleen took him by the arm and said, “I’ve got to show you something that’s really cool!” She then led him upstairs. When Daryl turned on the first stairwell landing, he gave Jake a look of curious wonderment.
Jake winked. Katherine nudged him in the ribs. Then Cokey and Margie entered, holding hands.
“Look at you two,” Katherine teased.
Margie said, “Yep, kiddo, tonight is date night. The kids are at grandpa and grandma Cokenberger’s, being spoiled rotten.” Margie hugged Katherine, “Gee, you’ve really decorated up the place. Good show!” she complimented. “All this really goes with the gargoyles out front.”
“Come in the living room,” Jake directed.
Cokey asked Jake, “Where’s the cats?”
“Oh, Katz locked them upstairs. With people coming in and out, she didn’t want them to get out.”
The doorbell sounded “You rang?” Katherine hurried to open it. It was her two students, Michelle and Glen, on their first date.
Michelle said, “I think the library needs an Addams Family doorbell. Kids would love it.”
Glen reached over and hugged Katherine and kissed her cheek. Katherine thought it was a little too friendly, and was speechless for a moment. She finally said, “Please come into the living room. We’ve got the bar set up there.”
As they walked in, Katherine observed a pretty young girl with dark hair pulled back in a ponytail; she was passing out appetizers. Glen made a beeline for her and said, “Hey, Tiffany, I didn’t know you were working here tonight.” He gave the young woman a big hug, and she nearly dropped the tray. He then used the most cheesy chat-up line of the century: “If I told you that you had a nice body, would you hold it against me?” The young woman’s face turned beet-red, and she moved away. But Glen followed her, totally ignoring his date.
Colleen and Daryl walked in. Colleen was smiling. Daryl joined Jake and Cokey, who were loading up on the puffy cheese pastries. Katherine advised, “Beware! They explode at will.” She pointed at the wet stain on her blouse.
Katherine whispered to Colleen, “What gives? What did you have to show Daryl?”
“My spirit hunting equipment. Last night at the fish fry, he said he was interested. Later, we’re going to explore the attic.”
“But what about the bats up there?” Katherine reminded.
“I’ll let Daryl handle that part of it,” Colleen smirke
d.
“Just make sure when you conjure up a ghost, you tell it to leave when you’re finished with it. Oh, and keep the attic door closed,” Katherine advised.
Katherine stepped over to the front turret window and looked for Misha’s motorhome. He still hadn’t arrived. He was very late. Since he was the entertainment for the cocktail hour, Katherine searched for the party planner and found her in the kitchen. She was exchanging recipes with Vicky.
“Mary,” Katherine interrupted. “Where’s Misha?”
“Oh, I just talked to him. He’s almost here.”
“Great! Could you meet him at the door and tell him to come to the living room and start his gig?” Katherine directed. “You did remind him we weren’t doing the pickpocket part until I’d okayed it with the guests?”
“Oh, yes,” Mary assured her.
The doorbell rang. Katherine started to answer it, but couldn’t resist another puffy cheese pastry, which once again exploded on the front of her blouse. “Dammit!” she said.
“Take this,” Vicky said, handing a damp rag to Katherine. “It’s got your name on it,” she said in jest.
“No, I’m going to take the back stairs and go up to my room and change. The entire front of my blouse is wet.” Katherine opened the kitchen stairwell door and ran up the rickety steps. She walked to her great aunt’s old bedroom, which she had converted into a dressing room. She changed into another blouse and then walked back down to join the party. By the time she got to the living room, Misha had arrived and all hell had broken loose.
Daryl had Misha in a chokehold. When Misha saw Katherine, he gasped in a hoarse voice, “Katsee … help?”
“Oh, my gawd!” Katherine yelled. “Daryl, please let him go.”
Daryl protested. “He stole my wallet!”
Katherine tried to explain. “It’s part of his close-up magic. I’m so sorry.”
Daryl released his grasp. Misha brushed the front of his purple velvet jacket more out of embarrassment than if any bodily harm had been done.
Katherine began to explain, “Misha didn’t read the memo about not doing this act until I’d talked to you all about it. We’re going to have a scavenger’s hunt. The person who finds the most items will win a gift card worth fifty bucks.”
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