by Taylor Hart
She glared at him. “No.”
“It’s not what you think, Tara, I—what about tonight? What about delivering the presents to the kids?”
Tears splashed her cheeks. There was no way she could see herself pretending to be okay and taking presents to people. No way. “I guess you’ll have to manage on your own.” She wiped beneath her eyes, thinking of all the things she felt like she’d lost but never really had. “Just like I will.”
He didn’t budge, just stayed there, having a stare-off with her.
She broke, stalking toward the large windows in her apartment. “Please go.”
The next thing she heard was the door close.
Tara felt anger surge into her. She had to leave. Go. Get out of town and away from her ex and Will and everything.
She picked up her suitcase and rushed to her room. Quickly, she repacked, taking enough clothes for a week. She didn’t know where she would go, but she had some credit cards. She figured she owed herself a trip.
As she rushed to the parking lot, opening her trunk and shoving the bag in the back, she pressed Shelia’s number.
“Hey,” Shelia said, “I’ve tried to call and text you a couple of times. Is everything all right?”
“Fine.” Her voice was calm as she moved back around to the driver’s side of the car. “I just wanted to check in and tell you I’m leaving town for a couple of days.”
“Oh.” Shelia sounded surprised. “I’ve missed you at the office and wondered where you had gone.”
“I … have been busy.” Tara held to the door, feeling woozy all of a sudden. “I just wanted to let you know I will see you when I get back, and please don’t tell anyone I’m going—” The wooziness got worse, and sudden pain stabbed through her stomach. “Ahh!”
“Tara!” Shelia called out.
Tara dropped the phone, unable to stop herself from falling to the cement. “Ahh!” she called out again, the pain getting worse. The last thing she called out before blacking out was, “I can’t lose this baby!”
Chapter 21
Will sat in his garage, lacking the energy to get out of his car. He’d just finished taking all the presents he’d been assigned to deliver.
Taking the presents without Tara hadn’t been that great. Sure, it made him happy that the kids were getting Christmas. But … Tara. He’d texted and tried to call so many times that her phone was probably dead by now.
His phone buzzed, and he immediately looked at it. Evan again. He’d been getting texts from all of them, reporting on who won the bet. It looked like they all had. Even though he wasn’t in the mood, he answered. “Hey.”
Evan laughed. “Dude, you’re not going to believe what happened with Ruffalo.”
“I’m going to talk to Cruz, so quit calling.”
“What?” Evan sounded uncertain.
Will stared at the steering wheel. He’d lost her, and nothing else felt important. “I’ll talk to Cruz.”
Evan paused. “What’s going on, Will?”
“I gotta go.”
“Wait!”
Will hung up, and he let out a grunt. Funny thing was, he didn’t care about facing Cameron Cruz anymore. He slammed his fist into the wheel. He longed for someone to give him a good tongue-lashing. Heck, he’d take a good pounding from one of his brothers. He deserved it. How could he do that to Tara? He should have confessed everything when she’d told him about the pregnancy. He should have …
“Ah!” He ran a hand through his hair. He needed to get on his treadmill and run ten miles to burn off all this angst. But Hank and all the other volunteers would be coming to his house soon, and he’d hired someone to cater cookies and hot chocolate. He knew he should go in the house and wait for all the volunteers, but he couldn’t.
He had to go to her.
Will started his car, backed up, and slammed on his brakes as he almost hit someone.
It was Hank pulling up.
Will scrambled out. “Sorry, bud.”
Hank got out of the car, looking look. “No problem, I just heard about Tara. You’re probably on your way to the hospital, right?”
Alarm shot through him. “What?”
Hank frowned. “Didn’t you hear?”
“No, what happened?”
“I texted her earlier about getting another list for my group, because I lost mine. When she didn’t respond, I called her secretary and she told me she’d fallen and was in the hospital.”
Will was already back in his car. He waved a hand to Hank. “Please go in through my garage, and you guys have a good time. I have to go.”
Hank waved back. “She’s at St. Mark’s! Tell her we’re praying for her!”
* * *
When Will got to the hospital, he didn’t waste any time, going straight for the lady at the desk. “Tara Lighthouse, I need to see her.”
The lady looked skeptical. “You’re that big-time football player, right?”
This was the perfect time to use his stardom for something. “Yes, can you please take me to her room?”
The lady cocked a disapproving eyebrow. “I hate football. I think it’s the reason me and my ex broke up, because one night he got so upset with the Storm he left and never came back.”
“I’m … sorry? Look, can you just tell me where Ms. Lighthouse is?”
The worker shook her head. “Only immediate family.”
Anger flared inside of him, but he knew this rule. Hospitals were particular about who could visit their patients. “I should be her boyfriend—or really,” he said, emotion surging through him, “I should have been her husband.”
The lady gave him a confused glare.
He wanted to pick up the chair sitting next to him and throw it. “I need to know if she’s okay!”
“Will.” The secretary from the other day wandered up to him, looking frazzled. She clutched a soda in her hand and frowned at him. “Why are you here?”
“I just heard Tara’s in the hospital.” All sorts of horrible things had run through his mind the whole car ride over. “Please, just tell me where she is.”
Shelia looked past him to the worker, then tugged him with her through a double door. “Stay close. Don’t draw attention.” Shelia sighed. “I had no idea that you two had been together the past couple of days until I met the ambulance here at the hospital and Tara told me.”
Will wondered how much she’d told her. “What happened to her?”
“She’s okay. She’s resting.” Shelia squinted at him. “Do you know …” She trailed off, looking uncertain.
“I know,” was all he said.
They turned the corner, and abruptly, Shelia stopped and grabbed his jacket. “Wait.”
There was a window to Tara’s room, and Will saw her lying in the bed. She looked just like an angel. “Is she okay?” Every part of him wanted to get in that room.
“Let me check on her first.”
Will waited, watching Shelia go inside the room. Tara didn’t move or even open her eyes.
“Who are you?” asked a man in a doctor’s coat. “What are you doing here?”
Will blinked and put his hand on the window. “Just tell me. Is she okay? Is the baby okay?”
The doctor heaved a sigh, muttering, “I thought there was no father.”
Pain seared into Will’s heart. She was alone. “Please …”
The doctor grimaced. “She took a good fall. You have to go. She needs rest.”
Will shifted his gaze back to Tara and saw her eyes were open. He blew past the doctor. “Tara.” Rushing into the room, he didn’t care about the fact she was mad at him. He went to her side and took her hand. “Tara.”
She didn’t chastise him and tell him he had to go. Instead, she broke into tears. “I can’t do this, Will. Please go.”
Taking her into his arms, he knew she was in shock. She cried against him, and tears ran down his face. “Shh, it’s okay. It’s okay.”
The doctor rushed in. “Please, you’re
not allowed to be here.”
Without warning, Tara went limp and a machine started beeping loudly.
Will stared down at her. “Tara!”
Commotion filled the room. The doctor rushed into action, pushing a button to silence the noise and yelling out orders to several nurses who had appeared. “Prep her for surgery, stat!”
“What’s happening?” Will grabbed the doctor by the shoulder. “I’m not letting go until I know.”
“We performed a D and C earlier. Honestly, this shouldn’t be happening.” The doctor pushed his hand away. “We have to get in there and see what’s going on.”
Chapter 22
Will sat in the hospital chapel. He knelt in front of a candle and a statue of Jesus on the cross. Tears bathed his face. One of the nurses explained that a D and C was a procedure used to get rid of extra “tissue.” Tissue meaning a baby.
He was shaking, trying to get a handle on his emotions. Worry over Tara. Sadness because of the loss of the child. More worry over Tara.
His phone buzzed and he pulled it out of his pocket. Unsurprisingly, it was Zane. He wasn’t in the mood for a FaceTime with baby Lily, but it wasn’t a FaceTime call. Plus, he needed someone.
He answered the call, trying to make his voice normal. “Hey.”
“It’s Christmas Eve and nobody’s at my house, bro, and I should be mad, but I suddenly got this … feeling.” He said the word slowly. “And your face popped into my head, so what’s up?”
More tears pushed into Will’s eyes. “What do you mean, a feeling?”
“You know the feeling,” Zane said simply. “That inner burning that Mom always told us about. The one that saved most of our lives in the service.”
Will couldn’t believe it. All the emotion he’d been unsuccessfully holding back rushed through him. “Zane …”
“Do you need me to come to you? I know some guys and I could get there pretty quick.”
Will laughed through his tears. “It’s Tara.”
“Yes,” Zane said, like he already knew.
“She’s in surgery, Zane. She … was pregnant, and they did something called a D and C, but she passed out and they don’t know what’s wrong.”
“Oh man.”
Will sniffed. “I just, I love her. I know how that sounds, because she’s barely divorced and she was pregnant.” He shook his head. “Too complicated, isn’t it?”
“It’s going to be okay.”
“No, it’s not.” Silence. “Are you there?”
“I’m here, bro.” Zane let out a long breath. “You know that I definitely know what it’s like to have a complicated past with someone. I think right now there’s only one thing for you to do, and you know what that is. It’s the only thing Mom taught us to do in times like this.”
Instantly, he did know. “Pray.”
Zane sighed. “I love you, bro. In fact, I’m going to find Sarah and text the others and we’re all going to pray for her, too.”
Will nodded, overwhelmed. “Thanks.”
“She’s going to be okay. She is.”
“Okay, bye.”
“Love you.”
“You too.”
He got off the phone. The first thing he thought of was when Tara had told him that she’d been about to jump and she’d said a prayer and he’d showed up.
Bowing his head, he began. “Dear Lord, I know I don’t talk to you much. In fact, I don’t remember the last time I really had a heart-to-heart—maybe last year when Momma passed.” His voice broke. “But I think you might have sent me to Tara’s a couple of nights ago. And I’m really grateful you did. In fact, Tara mentioned it might have been a Christmas miracle, although I don’t know if she would say that about me right now. She was kinda mad at me. I’ll just get to the point. If there is such thing as Christmas miracles, I could sure use one for Tara right now.” He broke down into sobs. “Lord, please … bring her back to me.”
Chapter 23
“Tara. Tara.” The sound echoed like it was at the bottom of a swimming pool. She thought of the summer before her senior year when she’d been a lifeguard at the city pool and she and Will had spent hours messing around, playing Marco Polo. The strange thing was that she knew this wasn’t the pool— butshe could have sworn that was Will calling out her name.
“Tara!”
Bam! It was like her head had burst above water. Her eyes fluttered open and she squinted against the bright light. “Ah.” The smell of hospital room assaulted her nostrils, and her mouth was dry.
“Sit her up,” someone said.
A motor lifted the bed with a mechanical hum, and she remembered all of it. Pain stabbed the center of her chest. “No.”
Someone had their hand on the back of her head, and a straw was pushed into her mouth. “Drink.”
She sipped at it, and it felt like water over a parched desert. She drank some more. Her eyes opened and she saw a crowd of people surrounding her, but the only one she cared about was Will.
He stepped forward, smiling at her. Those blue eyes of his looked raw. “Hey.”
It shocked her that he was here. She tried to lift her hand to him, but it fell back, weak.
He took hers. “Tear Bear.”
She sniffed. “Will, please.”
“I’m so, so, so sorry Tara. I was a complete idiot and I don’t deserve to be here, but I want you to know that it wasn’t about a stupid bet. That I love you. And I’m so sorry. And when I saw you slip away—” He broke off, and tears spilled. “I was lost. I need you.”
Tara felt like she could barely breathe. “I lost the baby.” Tears misted into her eyes and the pain felt like it would swallow her whole. “I lost the baby.”
Then he was leaning into her, pressing his forehead to hers. “I know. I know.”
One nurse said, “We’ll give you a minute.” They left the room.
Will reached back and pulled a chair to her side, reassuming the position of hand-holding. “It’s going to be okay.”
Every part of her felt washed out, broken. She pressed her eyes closed and let herself relax into the bed. “What happened?”
Will cleared his throat. “You were hemorrhaging. They had to go in and—” He looked down. “—make sure they got everything.”
She nodded, feeling a numbness take hold of her.
Gently, he squeezed her hand. “But you’re okay. That’s all that matters.”
Feeling disoriented, she looked around, unable to find a clock. “What time is it?”
“Six.”
That didn’t make sense. It had only been a couple hours since she’d passed out in the garage.
Will read her confusion and smiled at her. “It’s six in the morning. Christmas day.” His grin widened. “So I guess we get to spend Christmas together.”
She frowned. “Will, I can’t do this.”
He shook his head. “I was so stupid. Stupid, stupid, stupid. I never should have done something like that anyway.” Bringing her hand to his lips, he kissed the back of it. “Remember when I was a teenager and I’d do inexplicably stupid things and you’d just shake your head and laugh?”
She didn’t say anything.
“I’m not sure I’ve fully grown out of that. That bet was just stupid and immature. But I promise from now on that when I do stupid things, I’ll try not to do ones that hurt you. Or anyone. Because I want to be a better man, Tara. I want to be the kind of man you deserve. The kind of man that will make you happy.” He kissed the back of her hand. “I love you, and I’m so, so, so sorry.”
The moment was slow and sticky. Tears fell down her cheeks. “Even though you do stupid things, sometimes you do good things, too.”
“I do?”
She nodded and smiled. “And I love you, too.”
His eyebrows shot up. “You do?”
It was crazy to her, but she knew it was true. “I don’t think I ever really stopped, Will.”
He nodded and then dug into his jacket pocket, pulling out
what looked like …
“Oh my.” She couldn’t believe it.
“I kept it. And now I want you to have it.” He slipped onto his knee. “Marry me, Tara. Say yes this time. Because if you don’t, I’ll just keep asking.”
Thinking that he really did have the worst timing in the world, she let out a shaky breath. “Yes.”
Slipping it onto her finger, he pressed his lips to hers. “Forever.”
And she knew that this was the best Christmas ever.
Epilogue
1 Year Later
Will stood in the hospital room, his hand currently being crushed by Tara’s. “Wiiiiiiiiilll!” she screamed as another contraction hit her.
“Breathe in, breathe out!” he commanded, trying to remember all the instructions from the Lamaze instructor.
“No!” Tara wailed. “It was in, two, three, out, two, three!”
“Right!” His head spun. He felt worse than when he’d given up his first safety ever, getting sacked in the end zone by Miami a few weeks back. He focused on his hand that was currently in Tara’s vice grip. Dang, the woman was strong!
“I think it’s a boy,” Tara said between puffs of breath. “Because he feels huge!”
Will grinned and put his other hand gently on her forehead. “I’m glad we waited to find out, but a little girl who looks like you would be the best Christmas present ever.”
Tara relaxed, the contraction over. She leaned her head back and closed her eyes. “I know you, Kent. You just want to be the first one of your brothers to have a boy so you can coach a Little League team first.”
He sputtered out a laugh and lightly kissed her head. Would he like a boy? Of course, but he honestly didn’t care. He blinked and stared at this amazing woman. “I just want you both to be okay and happy, and I want to get through this right now.”
Her eyes flashed open and she rolled them. “Oh, you want to get through this, do you?”
“Sorry.”
A weary smile washed over her face. “I love you so much.”
