by Tanya Stowe
7
Alex was waiting for Penny when she returned from McDougal’s saloon a while later. He sent Lexie up to her room to play and made sure Jewel and Inga were occupied in the kitchen.
It was frustrating, trying to find a private place to talk. But since Penny made it even more difficult by avoiding him, he was almost done with those precautions.
She paused in the doorway. If not for the falling snow, she probably would have found some reason to stay outside until he left. Her attitude was so apparent; he almost smiled, but his patience was too close to its end.
She closed the door, hugged the shawl close and crossed the room with a purposeful stride. It seemed, during her moment of hesitation in the doorway, she’d decided to take the bull by the horns. One thing about his wife, she wasn’t lacking in courage…at least not his new wife.
The old Penny would never have faced him down. But this Penny…he watched her walk towards him, her green eyes flashing, and smiled. This woman stirred his blood in ways she never had before.
“I don’t understand you.” She kept her voice pitched low. “I told you why I don’t sing. I explained I don’t want to create a reputation that will follow me when we leave. I thought I was very clear.”
“You were. But that’s all changed now. You’re not a widow with a questionable past. I’m alive. You have a husband. Our daughter is legitimate, and you’ve been managing a family asset, this saloon. If people don’t respect that, then we don’t need their respect.”
“A family asset.” She repeated as if she’d never heard the words. “You can’t…associate yourself with me. You don’t realize how it will impact your reputation.”
“I told you, I’m the kind of man who doesn’t let what other people think impact me. I’m not happy you’ve had to resort to this type of business, but right now, your business is being threatened, and we’re not going to buckle to that kind of pressure.”
She halted. “You’d do that for me, knowing how I feel about turning it over to you?”
He stepped closer, so close they almost touched.
“I would.” His tone was low, tender. “Besides, I don’t think that’s the real reason you don’t sing.”
She raised her gaze. “What do you mean?”
“You used to love to sing, Penny. You sang all the time, even while you worked. I think you stopped because it made you feel passionate about life, and you didn’t want to feel passionate. You didn’t want to live and feel and be hurt again.”
“That’s not true!” She shook her head so hard and quick, the loose coil of her hair tumbled down. She made a small sound and reached over her shoulder.
“My pins. You forgot to buy me more pins when you went to the store.”
Alex hadn’t forgotten. He still had her pins in his pocket and had intended to return them to her.
But as she stood there, looking flustered and vulnerable, he decided he wouldn’t do it.
Penny needed to remember she was a woman. Having her hair down seemed to work, so he would make sure it happened as often as possible.
Taking the coil of copper-colored hair from her hands, he unwound it all the way and carried the bright, fiery length to his lips.
Roses. Her hair smelled like roses, just as he remembered. He closed his eyes for a moment, savoring its soft texture and his memories. When he opened them, he reached for Penny, to caress her face.
But she stepped back, tugging her hair out of his hands. She shook out the lengths and two tortoise shell pins tinkled as they fell to the floor. Penny quickly retrieved them, then wound her hair back into its coil and stepped back.
Alex’s jaw clenched. She’d won this battle but she wouldn’t win the war. She would be his wife again.
With his jaw tight, he slid his hands into his pockets. “So it looks like I’ll be your bartender again tonight. Do you think Holloway scared away the man you were going to meet today?”
She nodded. “I can’t prove it, but I’m sure word is out here on Bonanza Street to stay away from The Copper Penny.”
“Then let’s look for someone who doesn’t live on Bonanza Street.”
“Do you know someone?”
“I might. Let me see what I can do. In the meantime, you think about singing.”
“I’m not afraid to do it.” She lifted her chin a notch.
“Then prove me wrong, Penny. Sing and save your business.”
“I’ll think about it, but I won’t promise anything.” She gathered her skirts and moved around him, headed for the kitchen.
“One more thing, Penny,” he said to her retreating back. “Lexie is going to church with me in the morning.”
She spun around. “You…you can’t—”
“Why? Do you think God doesn’t listen to Lexie’s prayers, either?”
“People will talk.”
“I told you how I feel about other people and what they think. Besides, most of us in church know we’re sinners. We go there to get down on our knees and, for a small time, experience His perfection. My daughter will not miss one more minute of that. Have her ready.” He spun and headed for the door. His foot kicked something.
Looking down, he saw a pin Penny had missed. He picked it up, put it in his pocket, and walked out the door.
****
Penny walked the length of the windows in the front of the saloon, stood for a moment, and then walked back to the other end where she could see down the street.
Still no sign of them. Of course, they’d barely been gone thirty minutes.
Alex said they would be gone for at least two hours. True to his word, he’d shown up on time to pick up Lexie.
Penny had dressed Lexie in her best blue serge dress with a white pinafore. She’d even put a large blue ribbon in her hair.
Lexie looked adorable and Alex had looked so handsome. They were perfect together. Father and daughter.
Penny’s heart had nearly stopped when Alex reached out his hand and Lexie took it.
Fortunately, Jann and Inga had chosen that moment to come down the stairs. Dressed in their best, the young man and his mother asked if they could attend with Lexie and Alex.
Penny was able to turn away before anyone saw the tears in her eyes.
“Everyone’s welcome in God’s house,” Alex said, before shooting a pointed glance at Penny.
Her answer was to bend and kiss Lexie good-bye.
The little group hurried out the door.
Penny almost wished she’d taken Alex up on his not-so-subtle offer. At least she would know what was going on. She shook her head and turned to pace again. Showing up at church or anywhere with Alex could have disastrous results.
“You’re going to wear a rut in the floor,” Jewel said from the top of the stairs.
“I didn’t know you were awake.”
“It was hard to sleep with all the comings and goings this morning.”
“Jann and Inga went with Alex to church.”
“So I gathered.”
Penny looked down the street once more, just to make certain no one was there.
“You should have gone with them. Then you would have been able to keep a closer watch on her.” Jewel followed her gaze.
“The farther I’m away from them, the less likely there’ll be an incident.”
“Exactly what kind of an incident do you expect?”
Penny sighed heavily and plopped into a chair. “I know it sounds silly, but I have good reason to worry. Alex looks at life through rose-colored glasses, Jewel. When we first fell in love, he thought the whole world would love me just because he did.” She shook her head. “You should have seen him. He was so proud, so full of enthusiasm. He wanted to show me off. There was a dance, a big celebration, and he insisted we go. I had a bad feeling about it, but I gave in.
“It was such a mistake. There was a man named Jonah Willard. He was already drunk, and when he saw that Alex had brought me to the dance, he went crazy and created a scene. He yelled at me a
nd said I had no business there with real ladies.”
“Oh, no,” Jewel whispered.
“The sheriff and our friends threw him out, but later, when Alex and I walked home, he attacked us. He hit Alex in the head with a piece of wood.” She looked up. “Alex almost died, Jewel. He was in a coma for a day, and it was weeks before he was back on his feet.”
“You can’t take responsibility for the actions of a crazy man.”
“If I hadn’t shown up at the dance, Willard wouldn’t have had the excuse he needed to lash out at Alex. In a way, it was my fault, my punishment for reaching beyond my station.”
“That’s why you think something’s going to happen to Lexie?”
“No, I don’t think she’s in danger. But that won’t stop people from talking. You know as well as I do how much their scorn can hurt. She shouldn’t have to go through that, shouldn’t have to suffer because of who her mother is.” Penny jumped up and stalked to the window. “I have to get her out. I have to go someplace where people don’t know who I am. I have to.”
“What about your husband? Where does he fit into the picture?”
“He doesn’t. That’s the problem. Alex is…he’s bigger than life! You’ve seen him. He builds warehouses and sawmills and becomes the president of the miners’ union. He’d never be able to live quietly in some boarding house. He’d have the boarders marching for something.” A wry smile slipped over her lips.
“It’s not as if you’re his mistress, Penny. You’re his wife, legal and proper.”
“That didn’t stop the mob in Los Angeles from separating us.” She shook her head. “I just don’t believe we can ever be together, Jewel. Sooner or later, it will happen again. I want to spare my daughter that pain.”
“If that’s how you feel then you have no choice but to sing. You have to do something to get away before Lexie gets too close to her father.”
Jewel’s words echoed her own thoughts so closely, Penny stared at her friend. “I’d have to have a new gown, maybe two. I’d need a piano player. If I can’t get a bartender, where am I going to get a piano player?”
“I know one. A good one.”
“But will he work for The Copper Penny?”
“I’m sure he will. I don’t think he’s had a job since Daniel fired him.”
“Come on, then. Let’s go offer your piano-playing friend some work.” Penny grabbed their heavy cloaks from the rack.
They hurried down the boardwalk.
Jewel’s gaze constantly darted up and down the street.
Since the day Penny had found Jewel, beaten and drunk in the alley behind her saloon, Penny had taken care of her, nursed her, protected her, given her the strength to resist her own impulses.
When Jewel felt better, she’d tried to pay Penny back, tried to help in every way she could. She served drinks, washed dishes. Finding this piano player was another way for Jewel to help.
“Who is the piano player?” Penny asked.
“Tom Woten.”
“I know him. He’s good.”
“I wish you could have heard him at his best. I can still see him.” Jewel closed her eyes briefly. “His fingers rippled across the keyboard like it was water. He would always play my favorite song and tease me, try to make me smile when all I wanted was to die.”
Penny grasped her hand.
Jewel looked at her with a half-smile. “Tom was a bright light in my velvet prison. He shared it with me, helped whenever he could. And in the end, when he realized there was no way out for me, he helped with that, too. He drank with me, drank until he could hardly play. Daniel banished him from The Crown Jewel, sent him to another dark, dingy saloon on the outskirts of town.”
“Oh, Jewel, I’m sorry.”
“He lost his position as the piano player in the most prestigious saloon in town and nearly obliterated his wonderful gift of music, all for love of me. But I couldn’t love him back, Penny. I’d loved Daniel all of my life.”
Penny knew about Jewel’s love for Daniel. She understood it. The three of them were alike. Penny, Jewel, and Daniel had all been born to prostitutes.
While Penny had managed to avoid the dangers of that life, Jewel and Daniel had not.
They’d lived with their mothers in a large bordello in Chicago.
Older by a few years, Daniel had always protected Jewel. But when Daniel showed signs of becoming a young man, he was turned out into the streets. He was only ten or eleven at the time.
Jewel had begged and pleaded with the mistress of the house, but she was determined to send Daniel packing. In the end, he’d gone. But he’d promised to return for Jewel, to take her away.
Daniel made good on his promise and returned. He never talked about what had happened to him while he was away. He simply swooped in and swept Jewel out of the house. She thought he was her savior.
By the time Jewel realized the boy she loved and the man he had become were not the same, it was too late. She was trapped. She couldn’t walk away from the boy, but couldn’t live with the dark, violent man. With no way out, she’d fallen into her own pit of despair.
“I don’t know how to love anyone, Penny,” Jewel went on in a quiet voice. “I couldn’t…can’t love Tom the way he wants me to. The least I can do is to give him back his music.”
Penny felt the same way. The dream she’d had in the past, the hope of a life with her husband had died. The man had returned, but the hope had not.
Just ahead, Tom Woten exited a boarding house. He looked neither left nor right. With hunched shoulders, he turned the opposite way. He was tall and slender, too slender. His dark, stringy hair fell around his pale face.
Penny recognized the telltale signs of too much drink.
“Tom,” Jewel called out.
He turned and froze.
Jewel stretched out her hand. As he came towards her, she backed into an alley, out of view so their meeting wasn’t public.
Tom stared at Jewel, his pale features bright and his gaze open and admiring.
“Have I changed so much?” Jewel asked in a hesitant voice.
“From the last time I saw you? Oh yes, very much. You were always lovely, Jewel, but now you’re beautiful.”
“I’m too thin.”
He gently lifted her chin with his fingers. “Yes, you’re thin. But healthy, and your eyes…they’re clear and perfect. I’ll bet they light up when you smile.”
“I don’t do that very often anymore.”
His hands fell to his sides. Self-consciously, he tucked them underneath his arms, but not before Penny saw how they trembled.
“Tom, this is my friend, Penny Marsden.” Jewel gestured in her direction.
“I heard you took good care of her.” Tom nodded. He appeared too aware and self-conscious. “She looks wonderful.”
“I feel much better too, Tom. Look.” Jewel held out her own gloved hands. The fingers were steady. “I haven’t had a drink since I left The Crown Jewel.”
He stared at her hands, looking again as if he wanted to touch her. “I’m happy for you, Jewel, very happy.”
The hopeless tone in his voice broke Penny’s heart.
Jewel’s too, from the sound of her next words. “It isn’t just me, Tom, it can happen for you, too. It’s better there, easier. I know you could stop.”
“It’s too late for me.”
“It’s not too late,” Penny said. “It’s never too late, and besides, I need a piano player.”
“I told you it’s too late. I sold my piano almost two months ago.”
Obviously stunned, Jewel leaned against the wall of the boarding house building. “You sold your piano?”
“I had to pay my rent, had to eat and…” he didn’t finish, didn’t need to.
Penny knew what he really needed.
He stuttered into silence.
Penny felt like crying. But she didn’t sink into the hopelessness. Now she knew what to do, what action to take. “Who did you sell it to?”
/> “Joe Casey. I owed him fifty so I gave him the piano and he gave me ten more and fired me.”
“How much do you have left?” Penny asked.
His crooked smile told her all she needed to know.
“Who plays it now?”
“No one. Joe couldn’t find another piano player to replace me, so he rolled it into a corner and let it sit.”
“Are you sure?”
He shot her a look that told her just how many times he’d visited his lost piano. It was a look that convinced her.
“I have the money, Tom. If I buy the piano, will you come and play for us? You can earn it back. I’ll give you room and board, whatever it takes. Will you do it?”
“I can’t play, can’t do it.”
“You could if you stopped drinking,” Jewel said. “That’s the only condition. You have to stop.”
He sent her a wide-eyed gaze, full of hopelessness and fear. “Don’t you think I’ve tried? I just can’t seem to stop, no matter what I do.”
“I felt the same way, Tom. You can’t do it alone. I couldn’t. But we’ll be there. We’ll help you. If I could do it so can you.”
He gave her with an adoring, puppy look.
She stepped across the space and pulled one of his hands into both of hers.
“We can do it together, I know we can, but you have to want to stop. I can help only if you want to change. Do you want it, Tom? Do you?”
He looked at her as if he was mesmerized.
Penny could see his fingers trembling and smell the sour, morning-after stench of a binge.
Jewel said that she couldn’t love anyone, couldn’t love him the way he needed her to. But Jewel’s attitude showed she wanted to help him.
Tom gripped their clasped hands and closed his eyes. “I’ll do it. I’ll do whatever you want.”
“The first thing I want is for you to get cleaned up, and then pack your bags. Get rid of all your bottles and don’t take a drink. Not one. Promise, Tom. Not one drink.” Jewel was adamant.
He nodded.
“Good. We’ll be back for you later this afternoon. Will you be ready?”
He nodded again.
“Don’t let me down, Tom. I’m counting on you. Don’t let me down.” Jewel squeezed his hands one last time.
