by Potter, LR
“Hi,” he said quietly. “How’s the hand?”
As she raked him head to foot, she murmured, “Good.”
“Are you hungry?” he asked.
Slowly, she shook her head.
“You need to eat. The painkillers will make you sick otherwise.”
She nodded but didn’t say anything.
“I have to be back to the hospital in about an hour. Are you planning on working today? I wouldn’t recommend it.”
“I have to work. My shift begins at seven. What time is it now?” she asked.
They both glanced at his bedside clock: five p.m. She’d slept most the day.
Jace came and sat down beside her on the bed.
“Let me see your hand,” he demanded softly.
Unfolding it from her chest, she extended it to him. He set his coffee down and gently began to unwrap the bandages. With soft and easy touches, he probed the wound lightly.
“If I can’t convince you not to work, I’d recommend you at least wear a glove.”
“I will.”
“Are you okay,” he asked.
“Yes, why?”
“You were tossing and turning most of the day,” he replied.
“I’m sorry. I hope I didn’t keep you up,” she gushed.
“Who’s Nick?” he asked.
“Nick?” she asked hoarsely.
“Yeah, you kept repeating his name.”
She cringed. “Just someone I knew from a long time ago. How strange.”
Jace pulled the edges of the comforter down exposing her naked flesh. Moving his eyes over her body slowly, he said, “I’m glad you played hooky today. I’ve missed you.”
“Me too,” she replied softly.
Rising from the bed, Jace quickly dispensed of his pajama bottoms and climbed over her.
“I want you so much,” he whispered as he ran his tongue down the length of her neck.
“Me too,” she repeated.
He kissed his way down her body before slowly easing into her velvety softness. He stilled, buried deep within.
Moaning against her ear, he whispered, “God, you feel so good.” Moving his lips to hers, “I don’t think I’ve ever needed a woman as much as I need you… so stick around, okay?” he whispered.
Tears stung her eyes at his words. As much as she wanted to tell him she needed him too, she couldn’t force the words out of her mouth. The words would make her vulnerable to him and she just couldn’t risk it. So instead, she closed her eyes and gave herself up to this moment, to this man, who made love to her so tenderly.
As they stood together underneath the spray of the shower later, he drew her up against his naked, wet form – his front to her back. Lightly, he rained kisses across her shoulders causing chill-bumps to form on her skin. He intertwined their fingers and folded them around her middle.
She leaned her head back onto his chest. “Can I tell you a secret?” she asked.
“Of course… the dirtier the better,” he grinned against the top of her head.
“Today’s my birthday. I’m twenty-two.”
She felt his head snap up. “Why didn’t you tell me earlier? I would have…”
She turned in his arms and looked up into his beautiful face. “You’ve already made it perfect. This has been the best birthday of my life. Thank you.” Rising up on her tiptoes, she kissed him softly.
He drew his finger across her eyebrow as he stared down into her eyes. “How did I ever get so lucky?”
“I’m the lucky one,” she whispered back.
Wrapping his arms tightly around her, he picked her up and carried her back to his bed, never minding the pooling water or that he’d be impossibly late to work.
§§§
Thankfully, Wednesday night at Zeal’s was not as busy as the previous night. As promised, Tate wore a glove on her hand, which throbbed because she’d refrained from taking the pain medication, as it made her fuzzy-headed. While Thor was off on Wednesday, he’d called to check on her, along with a couple of the other wait-staff. It made Tate feel as if she finally belonged someplace in the world. She kept an eye out for Nick Tracey, and gave a huge sigh of relief when she didn’t see him.
Around ten p.m., with a thinning crowd, Zek ordered her off the clock and demanded she go up to her apartment to give her hand a chance to heal. Seeing she’d not be missing out on too many tips, she complied. Truth be told, her hand hurt… bad.
Exhausted from her all-nighter the night before, Tate slowly made her way up the stairs to her apartment. She was surprised to first see the light on in her kitchen, but also to find the door unlocked. Taking a deep breath, she slowly opened the door. Leaving the door open behind her, she cautiously entered the apartment. Sitting on her kitchen table was a tumbler of amber liquid sitting beside her bottle of Jim Beam. She knew she’d not left that out. For just an instant she wondered if maybe Jace had gotten off work early, but dismissed the notion, as she knew he’d have joined her downstairs.
She dug her cellphone out of her pocket and slid her thumb up the screen to activate it – just in case. She crept through the kitchen and darted her head around the archway. Seeing nothing, she moved stealthily forward with her heart pounding. She’d gotten halfway down the hall when her heart seemed to stop, as Nick Tracey came to the bedroom door, naked except for a towel wrapped low on his hips. Once her heart started again, pounding more furiously than before, she said through gritted teeth, “What are you doing in my house, Nick?”
“What kind of greeting is that? Why, we’re practically family,” he said, leaning against her bedroom doorjamb.
Fear kept her feet planted squarely where she stood. The thought crossed her mind, here was the reason she’d taken all her self-defense classes, and if he moved towards her, his mental hold on her was so great, she didn’t know if she could move.
“I want you to leave now,” she demanded.
Cocking his head to one side, he muttered, “When have I ever cared about what you wanted?”
“Why are you here, Nick?” she asked with trembling lips.
“I’ve been worried about you,” he said with mock concern.
With equally fake calm, she said, “When have you ever concerned yourself with me?”
“Do you know what happened to me after… our time together?”
Tate gave a nervous bark of a laugh. “No, pray tell. What happened to you?”
“I was ostracized by most of my school. Do you have any idea how hard that made things for me?”
“For you?” she scoffed, not believing his words.
“Yes, for me. Once the student body learned of your… dubious past and that you’d lived in my house… and after having witnessed the intimate nature of our relations, why, you’d have thought it was my family who were the poor white trash. You ruined my life.”
Tate gave a tiny shake of her head at the innateness of his statement. He’d raped her, videotaped it, then forwarded it to others… and she ruined his life?
She sagged against the wall, wanting him gone. “Please leave, Nick.”
Nick lifted his shoulder from the doorjamb and made his way to her unhurriedly. She tensed, but maintained eye contact, refusing to acknowledge the fear welling up inside her.
Standing a hairsbreadth from her, he placed his palm against her cheek, while rubbing his thumb over her bottom lip. Her heart began to pound and her body tensed at his nearness and touch. Her stomach roiled at the touch of his hand on her face. She longed to swat it away but was afraid to show him his power over her – his powShe’er to intimidate her.
“God, you were a good lay. With your sad eyes filled with fear. I saw how you watched me… wanted me.”
She jerked her mouth away from his thumb. “I loathed you. I did not want you. You raped me. You destroyed my life. I hated waking up knowing you’d… you’d touched me… defiled me.”
He moved even closer, leaned towards her, and whispered into her ear. “You were so tight. And while y
ou’d deny it, your body responded beautifully to mine. We were meant to be lovers… and we will be again.”
“No!” she yelled. “You will not ever touch me again. How could you possibly think I’d ever allow you to touch me? You need to go now!”
Nick startled Tate by throwing back his head and laughing. He slowly began to clap his hands. “Bravo, little sister. You’ve finally gotten a backbone. Too bad it’s not going to matter. Because you will do as I want or I’ll have a little chat… with what’s his name?” he asked as he snapped his fingers as if he’d just remembered something. “Oh yes, Dr. Jace Staton. Your DJ was a wealth of knowledge. Seems he was a little put out that you… well, didn’t put out,” he barked out a laugh at his own wit. “Who knows, I might even invite the good doctor over for movie night. And I have just the movie to show him. Do you remember it, Tate?”
“I’d rather die than let you touch me again,” she said through clenched teeth.
“We both know I have my ways of persuasion,” he mocked.
With her hand throbbing and tiring of his game, she said through gritted teeth, “Please get dressed and leave, Nick. And just so we’re clear, if I ever come home and find you here, I will call the police.”
He pursed his lips as he contemplated her.
“Tate, you left your door open.”
Tate froze at the sound of Jace’s voice. What was he doing here? She snapped her head in Nick’s direction and saw what Jace would see – her standing in her house with a naked man. As Jace turned the corner into the hall, Nick gave a quick tug to his towel causing it to fall to the floor while he grabbed her arms and pressed her up against the wall before placing his lips over hers. The feel of his lips on her stunned her, and fear as never before filled her. She knew she should push him away, but froze instead. Once she got her brain to work, she began to struggle against him, but his hold was too tight. Nick stepped back with a grin before casually bending down to pick up his towel.
Tate wiped a hand against her mouth and turned her head to Jace. He was standing at the entrance of the hallway dressed in his scrubs holding a cupcake with one candle lit on top. A myriad of emotions crossed his features: disbelief, shock, hurt, and finally, anger.
With her heart pounding, shock kept her paralyzed where she stood. She knew she should go to him and try to explain, but found she couldn’t move.
After what seemed an eternity, Jace blew out the candle and said with grim lips, “Happy birthday, Tate.”
He turned on the balls of his feet and headed out of the apartment. The closing of the door catapulted Tate in action and she turned to run after Jace. But Nick grabbed her arm.
“Let me go!” she shouted as she snatched her arm out of his grasp. She sprinted to the apartment door and flew down the stairs, catching her foot and tripping down the last two. She threw her hands out automatically to break her fall and felt the stitches in her injured hand rip open. She didn’t care, she scrambled to her feet and ran to the parking lot just in time to see Jace’s blue Cobra race off.
Her chest heaving, she turned and ran back up the stairs. When she reached the kitchen, she grabbed her purse and pulled out her cellphone as sobs were torn from her chest. She punched in his number but the call went straight to voicemail.
“Jace, please call me. It wasn’t what you think, please call me,” she said through great, drawing breaths.
“You’re getting blood all over the place. You should really do something about that,” Nick said coldly from the doorway.
Despair at losing Jace and anger at Nick’s part in it, had her throwing herself at him. She lifted both fists and pounded his chest.
“Why? Why did you do that? What did I ever do to you to make you hate me so much? You, bastard! I hate you so much!”
Nick easily captured her wrist in his grasp and shoved her away from him. “What did you do? What did you do? My life was perfect before you came. But then there you were, all big-eyed and vulnerable. My parents couldn’t do enough for you. They walked around pretending that you weren’t white trash. Well, I remembered and it made me sick. I wanted them to see you for what you really were. But you know what? Now, they won’t have anything to do with me. They wouldn’t even pay for my college. I was forced to go to work… to work, while all my friends – and even you, you who is worthless – went on to college. Imagine my surprise when I looked inside their mailbox and found an envelope addressed to you,” he spat. “I couldn’t freakin’ believe it. They turned away their own son, but will still associate with the likes of you,” he scoffed. “My life went to shit and I just wanted to return the favor… and now I have. Looks like I won’t have to use this after all. Why don’t I leave this here for your viewing pleasure?” he said, placing a CD on the counter. “I have another copy so don’t worry; I’ll never forget our special time together.”
With tears streaming down her face, she screamed at him, “Get out of my house and don’t come back! I don’t want to ever see you again!”
With a mocking laugh, he said, “As I’ve said before; I. Don’t. Care. What. You. Want.” He punctuated his words with a jabbing finger in the air.
Her shoulders sagged as the burning fire extinguished as quickly as it’d been ignited. “Please just leave, Nick. You’ve done what you set out to do. You have succeeded in destroying my life, yet again. Mission accomplished,” she muttered quietly.
Walking past her to the door, he punched her lightly in the arm. “Glad I could return the favor. Until next time. I’m heading back to Illinois, I have to go back to work. Good to see you, sis.”
Without another word, Nick pulled the door closed and whistled as he went down the stairs.
Picking up her cellphone, she began to punch in Jace’s phone number once more. She’d gotten halfway through the number when she hesitated. How would she answer his questions? Who was he? How do you know him? What is your relationship with him? Why was he in your house naked? Slowly, she clicked off her phone.
She looked down at her injured hand, it was a mess. The stitches that Jace had so carefully put in it were all destroyed… just like everything. She ran her hand under the water in the kitchen sink to remove the bits of gravel and dirt that’d come embedded during her fall. She knew she should probably go back and get more stitches, but couldn’t face Jace.
As she turned to go to her bedroom, her foot slipped on something on the floor. Looking down, Tate saw the cupcake Jace had brought. It had been smashed on the floor. Her heart broke at its sight. What a difference a few hours could make. She swallowed convulsively at the thought of Jace taking time out of his busy schedule to get her a cupcake and bring it to her. It was the nicest thing anyone had ever done for her. Seeing the crumpled delicacy, Tate decided it was probably best the way things happened. She didn’t deserve him – truth be told, he didn’t deserve her and all her baggage.
Sliding down the cabinet door, she drew her knees up to the huge hole where her heart had been and mumbled through her tear-clogged throat, “Happy birthday to me.”
Sobs ripped through her as the reality of her life without Jace hit her.
Chapter 6
As much as she didn’t want to, Tate dragged herself off to school the next day. In the three classes she had with Tiffany, she carefully avoided sitting next to her. She just couldn’t deal with her petty issues today. While she felt as if she had an elephant sitting on her chest, she refused to cry any more. She’d learned about the hard knocks of life a long time ago. She was thankful for the money Alan had sent for her birthday. Between that, and money she had saved, she could pay Jace back for the software program he’d purchased. She’d make sure he got his money back and then she’d be done with him. She wasn’t sure how she was going to deal with him at Zeal’s.
She was exhausted by the time she got home due to her sleepless night, and her hand was swollen and throbbing. She unwrapped the bandage and the slash running across the length of her hand looked even worse. She carefully cleaned it out an
d re-bandaged it before enclosing it in a glove. She was halfway down the stairs when she realized she’d forgotten to eat today. Her stomach turned at the thought of food anyway, so she kept going.
Thursday night was ladies night at Zeal’s, and was busy, even with the use of a DJ. She refused to even pretend to be civil to Nelson. The DJ had betrayed her to Nick and she’d never forgive him.
When she moved to the bar for an order, Thor asked, “How’s your hand?”
“Good, getting better,” she lied.
“Bet the doc was surprised to see you, huh?” he asked.
“Yes, he was.”
She was surprised at how calm her voice was. She could do this.
§§§
When she woke the next morning, her hand really hurt, she felt headachy and very hot. She thought she was running a fever. She downed a couple of ibuprofen on her way out the door.
By the end of the day, she had no idea what had been discussed in any of her classes. She was happy Friday was a half day. She crawled up the stairs to her apartment, forced herself to eat some soup, before downing more ibuprofen. She curled up on her bed, longing for sleep to come and claim her, but her chaotic thoughts wouldn’t let her rest. Maybe she could just tell Jace the truth about everything. He might understand. Her mind went back to their first date when he told her with pride about his own family with the exception of his brother in prison.
Rising from the bed, she opened the closet door and pulled on the string which clicked on the naked light bulb suspended there. With her uninjured hand, she patted across the shelf built in above a rod extended the width of the closet. She finally felt the shoebox shoved in the back. She had to stretch as much as she could to get the box within her grasp. She pulled it down and went into the kitchen to look at its contents.
At the table, she took the lid off the box, turned it upside down, and let the contents scatter onto the table. She looked at the old, yellowed newspaper clippings. This was all she had left from her life as Patanga Moon. Her fingers shook when she unfolded the brittle paper. In one corner was a grainy photograph of her father, Travis Moon. His dark hair and eyes appeared black in the picture. Next to it was a photo of her mother, Tilda Moon. She’d always thought her mother might have been pretty once, but it’d been a long time before the picture was taken. Tilda Moon kept her hair bleached a white blonde. From years of smoking, her lips and the area surrounding them had fine lines grooved into them. Her dark eyes were brittle. She’d always had such a hard edge. Tate had never felt her mother loved her or her older sisters.
