“He doesn’t even like me.” He did not argue with me. We both knew it was the truth, but saying the words made my shoulders sink further.
“When he is ready, he will change. Show him how.” Bard paused. “Now off to bed, child, and remember, stay by him, be patient, and do not lower your expectations for him as a mate. He can attain them.”
It wasn’t hard to lower my expectations. I had none for him. Staying by him was easy. He never let me be more than a few feet from him while walking through the woods, and I had to sleep by him.
As I crawled in beside Carmon, I paused to ask a question I really didn’t want the answer to, but needed. “Bard, what creatures want me so badly?”
Bard stared back at me. I could see he didn’t want to tell me. “Vampires and Demons, child.”
“Oh boy,” I whispered, and not wanting Bard to feel bad for telling me, I spoke with more cheer. “Okay, then. Good night!” I was sure he saw through my act. No one is that cheerful when they learn vampires and demons want to bond with them.
In my mind, I was going to lose it. Oh no, oh no, oh no. Can’t be real, can’t be real. I kept repeating those words in my head. I was terrified. No matter what, I would take Carmon as my mate over the monsters we could potentially face in this forest. He, at least, cared for my safety a little.
I faced away from Carmon in bed like normal, but I backed up until I barely touched him. I tried not to let my trembling wake him, but after a time, I felt him roll over to face me. Then an arm came around my middle and pulled me tighter to him. I tried not to stiffen or blush as embarrassment rolled through me. I wanted to bury my head in the pillow, but I wouldn’t let myself.
“How much did you hear?” I whispered. I was now totally embarrassed as well as frightened.
“Enough to know you’re scared,” he answered just as quietly, and a little too vague. I involuntarily shivered again. This time, though, it had nothing to do with fear, but everything to do with the hard muscles behind me. He must have thought I shivered in fear because he pulled me even closer. Oh, Lords and Ladies why did he have to be a jerk all the time? After my latest shiver, he added, “I will keep you safe, Mate. I promise, or I will die trying.”
I rolled over to stare at him. Immediately I missed the warmth at my back. “I don’t want you to die for me.” I didn’t want anyone to die for me. If I was going to die, I wanted it to be me, and not someone else who fell.
“It’s not your choice. It’s mine. My choice and my duty.”
“Will there ever come a day when I am not just a duty to you?”
“I don’t think I can give you what you want,” He looked into my eyes so I would not doubt his words. The hope I’d been holding onto slipped from my grasp, and I couldn’t stop a tear from rolling down my cheek as overwhelming sorrow burrowed deeper into my heart. He would die for me, but wasn’t willing to like me? Even friendship would be welcome over what we had going right now.
Wanting to change the subject from our relationship, I asked, “What can you do against demons and vampires?”
He pulled me close and whispered in my ear. “More than you think. There’s more that could be explained, but you’ve been through enough. For now, sleep. You are safe tonight.”
“I’m holding you to that, Commander,” I warned, but I knew I was safe. My life might not mean much to him, but duty did. He would keep me safe to fulfill that duty. I should have been grateful, but I couldn’t decide if death would be better than a life spent alone, physically and emotionally.
******
The next morning Adam woke everyone up very, very early. Carmon had requested it. Needless to say, no one was too chatty, and soon we were on our way into the forest again. It was still black as night outside. I hated it, but the darkness hid the fear on my face. All I could think about was what evil laid in wait out there. Carmon had assured me again before leaving that I was safe, and I kept playing his words through my head until the sun started peeking through the trees. Then a giant rat-like creature scurried under some bushes. I had shrieked and my Commander’s hand covered my lips instantly. There was so much rage in his eyes when he glared down on me. I knew I’d messed up. I tried to apologize, but all I got in return was, “Shut it.”
The good part about the morning was that it was so nice to feel a backpack on my back. Knowing it was filled with clothes and food made it even better. Bard had given them to us before we left. Where he had gotten them, I would probably never know. He was so kind. I wished he had rubbed off more on my mate.
No one acted like they had overheard my conversation with Bard in the middle of the night. Having Carmon hear it had been embarrassing enough, but he hadn’t mentioned anything about it since. I wished my embarrassment had stopped at Bard and I, but of course, it didn’t. It had to continue into the morning when I woke up laying on Carmon’s chest, arm around his waist and legs wrapped around his. I was practically laying on the man! He was a horrible excuse of a human being and I was throwing myself at him in my sleep! Even worse, he was already awake when I awoke. I knew my deep blush had not gone unnoticed, and he smirked at my embarrassment.
The nightmares I’d had during the night had probably driven me closer to him. They were filled with creatures from the fairy tales parents told their children to force them to behave. Horrible, glowing-eyed creatures who devoured blood like it was going out of style. I wasn’t sure if that’s what vampires or demons looked like, but that’s how they appeared in my mind. I hoped I wouldn’t find out what they actually looked like while in this forest.
With all those thoughts running through my head, it took me a few steps to realize that Carmon had stopped. It was almost lunch time. Was this the best spot he thought we could find? There was nowhere to sit and the ground was wet. Was he that cruel to make us sit on the wet ground or be forced to stand?
“Adam, take Sylee to the back of the group and guard her with your life,” Carmon ordered. His voice was calm, calmer than he had ever sounded before. Something was wrong. I just knew it, and I dread pooled in my stomach. “The rest of you back up and stay on your toes.”
“What’s wrong, Commander?” I asked as I glanced around frantically while moving toward Adam.
“Follow every command Adam gives you, and keep your mouth shut
“Okay,” I spoke so he would know I heard him.
“Stop talking Sylee.”
Fine. I didn’t mean to let out the soft growl, but when he heard it, Carmon looked over his shoulder and his eyes threatened retribution if I did not stay quiet. I took up my defiant stance and anger bubbled under the surface of my emotions
“What’s wrong?” Drew asked. Carmon didn’t say anything back before Drew replied, “I don’t think so.” He closed his eyes and started spouting information. “There’s a large hole under you. Looks to be a food trap for vampires. It’s empty and nothing waiting to kill you below.” I missed the rest of what he said. I was stuck on the vampires and how in the world Drew knew what was underneath Carmon.
Without warning, Carmon fell into the earth. I let out a brief scream, brief because Adam’s hand was over my mouth almost instantly. It wasn’t like I was really scared, just wound up super tight from the night before and the rat creature this morning. The hole Carmon had fallen in was deep. I couldn’t even see his head and so much debris had fallen in with him. I tried to move forward to see if he was hurt, but Adam’s arm snaked around my waist, holding me in place.
“He’s fine, Sylee. He stepped on a release for a trap, and when he moved, the trap sprung,” Adam explained. “Drew will help him out and we’ll keep going.”
Coughing came from the pit and Drew leaned over and easily pulled Carmon out. Carmon was very well muscled. Drew must have been the epitome of muscled men to be able to lift his brother out without a hint of struggle. Remind me to never make that man angry.
“Time to hurry and move before the vamp that made this trap comes calling,” Drew said while Carmon dusted himself of
f. He wore the same type of black clothing he had worn when he arrived at my parent’s house. Now, though, it looked gray and brown from the dirt that had fallen all over him, and there was dirt in his hair. My hands wanted to reach out and help him clean himself off. They must have remembered what it was like to move along those muscled arms after Carmon’s nightmare to help stop his trembling. Get a grip girl. For your own sanity, and your future happiness. My heart skipped a beat as I had the passing thought that I hoped my hands hadn’t wandered too much last night in my emotional state. I wanted to jump in the vampire trap and bury myself.
I took my place behind Carmon once again when we continued our journey. We stopped to eat an hour later. It wasn’t much, jerky and an apple, but it was better than berries and roots. The foliage was becoming denser and we couldn’t travel as fast as we had earlier in the day. It was actually my family who couldn’t move as fast. The Lanshay brothers were again being detained by my frail family. I wished I knew how they could move so gracefully and have so much energy.
We didn’t rest long before we were on our way again. The creatures were back skittering around us. If they were indeed held off by the scent of unrelated male on me, I would sleep by Carmon without complaint, and for the first time, I was a little grateful for the bond that protected me. I was happy that if we did meet up with a horrible creature, like a demon or vampire, I wouldn’t have to face them alone.
Carmon stopped us soon after dusk when the fog rolled in. The humidity made everything damp and the air heavy as we laid down to sleep.
“I feel like I’m breathing underwater,” Isla complained from where she lay, trying to sleep. “I’ll be soaked by morning.”
“Quiet,” Carmon ordered. I hadn’t given him permission to sleep closely to me, and now I was grateful I made that choice.
“I miss the sound of crickets and frogs and other swamp creatures that you’re supposed to hear when you camp,” Isla said a few minutes later.
Carmon groaned next to me. I wanted to beat him. If he wasn’t careful, I would get at least one good punch in before he could stop me, and break his perfect nose.
Instead I opted for the nicer route. “Give her a break, Commander. She’s just trying to stay calm. It’s dark and she’s scared.”
“Isla,” he said with more politeness. “You need to remain quiet.”
Not exactly what I had had in mind, but at least he wasn’t yelling at her.
“Okay,” my sister mumbled, and I could hear a tiny quiver in it. I should have been next to her, but I couldn’t be. Instead, I was lying next to a man who I knew would, and could, protect me.
“Are we safe, Commander?” Isla asked after a few more minutes.
“Are we ever going to get sleep?” Archer grumbled from where he slept. I wanted to bust my brother’s nose too. He had to make fun of her now? Her Commander was already giving her grief.
“Archer, leave your sister alone,” our Dad reprimanded. Thank you, Dad!
“She won’t be quiet.” Archer usually wasn’t so whiny, but he was exhausted like the rest of us from our day of walking. His mood must have been damaged along the way.
“Enough,” Carmon growled as he sat up. I was afraid my family had pushed him too far again. I didn’t want to be at the brunt of his anger again, but I would protect my family. Luckily, I didn’t need to defend anyone. “I will not give the order to be silent once more. We are safe, Isla. My brothers are on watch. They won’t let anything happen to us.”
My mate/horror story had no patience. He had no kindness in his heart. Hadn’t he ever been scared before? Isla stayed quiet for a long time after Carmon’s outburst. I wasn’t sure what scared her more, Carmon or the dark. Carmon probably didn’t know that Isla was a Light healer, or would be when she was trained. Healers were not known for their fighting skills and because of that they were more fearful on missions. If he knew, it would help him understand her fear.
A few minutes later, I heard Isla’s sniffles. I knew Carmon heard them too when he let out a quiet sigh. I suddenly knew what needed to be done.
“Go get her,” I ordered in my strongest voice.
“What?” he asked, confused by my command.
“Go. Get. Her.” I repeated slowly so he would not be able to mishear my words.
“She’s fine.” The irritation in his voice was evident.
I was done. “She is not fine,” My voice was like a dagger, even to me. “If you want her to be quiet you overgrown boy, you will go get her. You will be nice about it and not make her feel inferior. If you do make her feel badly about herself, I will personally make our lives together a misery for you. You need to grow up. The way you act is beneath someone of your rank. Get over yourself. Now, go get my sister.”
I think I stunned him with my little speech. He didn’t move, didn’t talk. I wasn’t sure he even blinked, though it was too dark to see his eyes. A woman had probably never reprimanded him before. Not that I blamed them. The look of ice in his eyes was incredibly intimidating. Maybe it was the darkness that let me be so bold now.
My mouth almost fell open in shock when he stood to do as I had said. Somehow, he found Isla easily in such darkness. He must have thought talking to her would scare her, but she shrieked a few seconds later when he touched her. Silly boy. I wouldn’t want someone touching me in the dark.
“It’s okay. Calm down,” he ordered quickly, and a bit gruff. I didn’t complain since he was doing as I requested. Okay, it wasn’t a request, but I was attempting to be humble.
“Commander?” Isla asked.
“It’s me. Now stay quiet.”
I heard rustling and my father’s voice filled the air. “What’s going on?”
“Stay quiet, Governor. She’s okay. Sylee wants her over with us,” Carmon explained as he silently walked back to where I lay. The only reason I knew he was on his way back was because his voice grew closer. He was silent. No one could be that quiet could they? I felt him lay Isla next to me, and she snuggled close. Her breathing quieted quickly and she relaxed. She was so tired, but fear had been more prevalent.
I stayed quiet for a while to make sure she was in a deep sleep before asking a question that had been bothering me. I was a little afraid to talk, but knew he wouldn’t hurt me. “Why haven’t we been attacked yet? We haven’t even caught sight of a creature until today. The only evidence of them have been the footprints the first night and the scurrying sounds during the day.”
“They’re out there. They’re just watching for now, but I doubt they will do too much of that tomorrow,” Carmon whispered in my ear so as not to disturb the others. I shivered from his breath hitting my ear just right. I hoped he didn’t, yet again, think I was afraid.
“Why is Bard safe in the forest?”
“Bard is not human, but a lower elemental. He is more powerful than any creature in this forest. He governs it, and they are not allowed to attack him.”
“You were sent to live with a lower elemental?” I asked a little louder than I meant to, shocked, but everyone else seemed to be asleep.
“Yes. I’ll explain it to you later when we make it through the forest center.”
“The forest center?”
“Yeah, it’s the area where the vampires and demons live. It’s dense and foggy like this, but worse. We stopped early tonight so we could start the day fresh heading in. I didn’t want to sleep there. Not with the bond just created.”
“Oh, okay.” My aching, tired muscles were catching up to me, and I was suddenly so tired, but I needed to say one more thing. “Commander?”
“Yes, Sylee?” He sounded tired himself, but at least he hadn’t bitten my head off for still talking.
“Good night, sir.” I paused, not really wanting to say the next line, but knowing it could only help us. “And thank you for bringing my sister over. You’ve earned some cuddle time if you want it.”
“Good night and you’re welcome.”
I felt him slide closer to me before h
is arm wrapped around my waist. He was warm and I enjoyed being snuggled between two bodies. Not all the heat was from their body heat, though. My own body was reacting to the one at my back. Have hope, Bard had said. How long did I have to hope for? I couldn’t hold out for the next 80 years, but I could for a little while. Was his soul worth it? Bard thought it was.
******
When I woke up the next morning, I was toasty warm. I could tell Carmon was still asleep behind me. Isla was on the edge of sleep and was bound to wake up very soon. The sun hadn’t risen yet, and I felt more comfortable taking care of bodily functions when no one could see. Wandering into the forest a short way, I couldn’t help but feel that it was somehow overcrowded, like more creatures had joined the ones who had previously watched us.
I was on my way back to the campsite when I ran smack into someone. I gasped and a hand was placed over my mouth, again.
“Shh…” Carmon said into my ear as he continued to hold his hand over my mouth. The other hand was behind my back and had stopped my retreat when I hadn’t known it was him in front of me.
“What is it?” I asked, looking around the forest after he had removed his hand from my mouth. I hoped he would know the meaning of my question. Thankfully, he did.
“Those creatures you asked about last night. They’ve all gathered for a show today,” he answered into my ear.
“I don’t understand.”
“I think you do,” He took my hand, “Please don’t leave the campsite without me again.”
“I didn’t want an audience.”
“I know, but for your safety, do not do it again. At least make sure I am awake.”
It was the kindest reprimand he’d given me. Maybe he was trying to act nice in front of all those extra creepy crawly creatures.
Carmon finished waking my family and his brothers. We ate quickly and found ourselves walking just as soon as we could see where to put our feet. The fog had not dissipated which caused us not to see the sun. Everyone was on edge. I knew my family could sense the change in the forest as I had. Goosebumps were continually making their presence known on my arms with the more frequent and louder skittering noises.
Life and Water: The Elementals: Book One Page 7
