She shook her head, bent close to the table and shot a ball into the corner pocket. “That’s right. I did tell him three times I was fine before my elbow had to do the talking.”
Ethan chuckled and took a shot. The ball scooted across the table and also disappeared down the pocket. “It worked. He listened to you then.”
“I know but he hasn’t since.”
Ethan frowned. “Since?”
Bridie chalked her pool cue. “He keeps texting me offering to show me around. He swears he knows every back trail and the best places to take photos of wildlife.”
“I bet he does. One of them would be Bobcat Hill the local make-out spot.”
Laughter briefly chased the shadows from her face. “And you know this how? I thought you lived at Colorado Springs?”
He chuckled. “I do when I’m not playing tour guide or doing crosswords. I happen to have passed some trucks one night at Bobcat Hill that had very steamy windows.”
“Well, I won’t be steaming up Nick Ryan’s truck windows at Bobcat Hill or anywhere else.” Her expression softened. “I’d rather wait out bears anytime.”
Ethan tightened his grip on the pool cue. He was a breath away from kissing her. But she’d come inside upset and the last thing she needed was him reaching for her. They’d also agreed that there would be no more kissing.
“Hopefully when you’re back in the mountains there’ll be no bears to wait out.”
Even to his own ears his reply sounded husky.
Her eyes searched his before she nodded, lowered her pool cue and took another shot.
“Are you thinking of heading back there soon?” he asked, knowing her answer even before she spoke.
“I wasn’t. But I am ... now.”
He silenced his offer to go with her. She’d made it clear when she’d first visited Henry she needed time in the backcountry by herself. Despite drawing closer during their days away, it wasn’t his place to intrude on her grief. No matter how much he cared for her or how desperate he was to ease her pain.
He chalked his pool cue even though it didn’t need any extra powder. “When will you go?”
“I promised to take Finn to Marietta again tomorrow so it won’t be until Sunday morning.”
“I know you can take care of yourself but be careful up there. Cordell found three elk carcasses at the back of Beargrass Hills that had been left to rot. The poachers are still around.” He risked a glance at her. Her independent spirit wouldn’t have appreciated his advice. But instead of a frown, she watched him, gaze indefinable.
He spoke again. “Rocket loves the high country so why don’t you take him with you? Henry wouldn’t mind.”
“That’s an idea. But ... can he cook apple crisps on the campfire? Can he make me smile when all I feel like doing is crying?” She stopped. The pale skin of her throat rippled as she swallowed. “Ethan would you ... could you ... come with me?”
He hesitated. Yes had already formed on his tongue but his conscience held him quiet. He’d missed her so much, even just an hour’s ride with her would ease the ache in his heart. But more days away together, let alone nights, was only asking for trouble. Even if Bridie had said he wasn’t a complication he couldn’t risk anything further happening between them. She needed to say good-bye to her father not dive head first into a fling.
As the silence grew, she watched him, gaze steady but guarded.
He rubbed at his jaw. “Are you sure? I’d like nothing better but it has to really be what you want. Rocket will make any poacher think twice about approaching you, so you’d be safe. With him, you’d also be able to ... let go ... in private.”
Her chin angled. “I’m sure.”
“Okay then.” Caution still slowed his words. “There might be a problem though of when we can go. I can leave Sunday, but Monday I have to take Henry to Bozeman for business appointments. So if you wanted to be away longer than a day we couldn’t leave until Tuesday and that might be too late.”
She didn’t hesitate. “Let’s go for the day Sunday. I need to go ... soon.”
“Okay. Sunday it is.” He replaced his pool cue as though they’d agreed to something as simple and casual as having a coffee at the Java Café. He pushed aside his tension. They’d spend the day on horseback, not lying yards apart around an intimate campfire. Nothing would happen between them.
“Thanks.”
Bridie too replaced her pool cue. She tucked the hair brushing her cheek behind her ear. The action dislodged the white flower she wore and it fell to the floor.
Ethan bent to retrieve the flower and straightened to the sight of Bridie redoing her hair. The action of reaching behind her head stretched the bodice of her sundress tighter and higher. Mouth dry, he locked his jaw. He didn’t need any reminder of how feminine or gorgeous Bridie was, or how weak and human he was. His testosterone already fixated on the memory of how it felt to have her in his arms and her legs wrapped around him.
“Here you go.” He held out the flower spray, his hand not as steady as usual. For her sake he had to ensure that things remained purely platonic between them. No matter how much he wished things could be different.
She re-tucked the flower into her hair and lowered her arms. Their gazes held. Despite the blue in her dress, her eyes appeared more grey.
“Ready?”
His quiet question wasn’t just about having her flower back in place. He wanted to check she had her emotions safely stowed and was ready to return upstairs.
Her fingers looped through his and he curled his hand around their warm fragility.
“I am now.”
Her hand stayed in his until they reached the kitchen doorway. Then with a small smile she slipped her fingers free, and shoulders squared, stepped into the kitchen.
As lunch progressed it was as though Bridie’s heartfelt plea to accompany her into the mountains had never happened. Seated beside Finn, she made jokes with Henry, chatted to Payton about her mustang, Gypsy, and all the while ignored him. Which was just as well. While glasses clinked, cutlery rattled and laughter sounded as people enjoyed Clara’s birthday lunch, Ethan continually felt himself under observation.
Henry’s shrewd gaze flickered between him and Bridie. Cordell’s all-seeing stare rested on him far more than normal. Trinity’s green eyes missed nothing, even when Ethan passed Bridie a full water pitcher when he’d noticed her empty glass. The cutting of Clara’s cake couldn’t come fast enough.
When the cake had been cut and coffee mugs replaced wine glasses and beer bottles, Bridie slipped into the empty seat beside him. Just for a second her leg pressed against his to say that she hadn’t forgotten about him.
“So, Bridie, when’s your next mountain trip?” Henry asked from across the table, expression innocent.
“Sunday.”
Henry’s narrowed gaze zeroed in on Ethan. “So you’re not going?”
Before Ethan could answer, Bridie spoke. “He is. It’s just a day trip so Ethan can take you to Bozeman Monday.”
Henry grunted. “So you’ll want to leave early then so you can have a full day away?”
“No, just the usual time,” Ethan said, voice firm. He hadn’t missed a telltale glint in Henry’s eyes and going by Cordell’s widening grin, his twin hadn’t either. They both knew what that glint meant. Henry was up to something.
“So where will you be tomorrow night, Bridie?” Henry asked, his voice too smooth. “Your mom’s house in Marietta or out here at Zane’s?”
“Probably here, why?’”
“Why waste time driving when you could be riding? Come and stay the night at Larkspur Ridge.”
Ethan fought to keep his tension from registering on his face. A night in close proximity with Bridie, even if there was a wall between them, would be living dangerously.
“That’s a great idea,” Bridie said sweetly. She winked at Payton, who sat close beside Cordell. “But I don’t need to stay at Larkspur Ridge, Payton’s already asked me to stay.”
Ethan took a gulp of coffee to mask his grin and saw his brother do the same.
Henry’s matchmaking plans didn’t stand a chance against two beautiful and willful cowgirls. But as Henry leant back in his chair and his eyes smiled, Ethan had a suspicion that uniting Bridie and Payton had been his goal all along.
Chapter Eight
“I thought you told Henry we were leaving at the usual time?”
Bridie flicked up the collar of her denim jacket to prevent the pre-dawn chill from stealing the warmth from her skin. Around her stretched an intense silence. Not even the birds were awake. Ahead of her in the gloom, Ethan and Captain were a blurred outline.
Ethan turned to speak over his shoulder. “We are. We’ve just a little further to go today in a shorter time.”
He slowed Captain and Molly drew alongside the even-tempered bay. Ethan’s smile flashed. “Trust me. It will soon be worth the early start.”
Bridie returned his smile. “I’m not complaining; you know I can’t get to the mountains quick enough, it’s just ...” She smothered a yawn. “Payton and I talked until late and another hour of sleep wouldn’t have gone astray.”
Ethan chuckled. “I know you and Payton were up late. Cordell texted and said he was coming over to sleep if you didn’t stop laughing and talking soon.”
“Ha. Did he? I guess he forgot to mention he was the one making us laugh and he only went to bed half an hour earlier than us.”
Ethan shook his head. “Cordell and his stories. For a cowboy who could never talk his way out of trouble he sure can spin a yarn when he wants to.”
“He can. I finally found out what happened between you and the Taylor boys. Even since Lesley mentioned there’d been trouble and you and Cordell stopped their cattle rustling, I’ve been wondering.”
Ethan shot her a quick look. “I didn’t realize you wanted to know. I would have told you as well as given you the correct version. Which one did Cordell tell you?”
“The one where he talked, they listened and then you threw a punch.”
“I take it Payton was in the room. They’d only just started going out when we tracked down the Taylor boys and as Cordell was supposed to be taking fewer risks and living less dangerously he was a little sketchy on the details.”
“I gathered that because Payton laughed so much she nearly choked. She told him as if she ever believed there wasn’t more to the story. So Cordell came clean and said he tried to talk first but his, what did he say you called it, ‘his death-glare that would snap-freeze a lake’, didn’t work and so he had to talk without using words.”
“He did and then, as I always do, I had his back, and one bruised fist the next day.”
“Ouch.”
Cordell had told other stories about Ethan and common to each one had been his love and respect for his more level-headed twin. She’d listened and nodded, careful to not reveal how much she wanted to know more about Ethan. But when a story had ended and she’d asked for another one a little too quickly, Cordell’s blue eyes had warmed and she’d known she hadn’t fooled him. He’d realized that talking about Ethan made her heart beat faster and made her feel closer to him when he wasn’t with her.
But he was with her now. She looked sideways. In the poor light Ethan wouldn’t see her expression or if her gaze lingered. She still didn’t know what had made her ask him to come with her. She wasn’t worried about poachers or being on her own, all she knew was that without him the peace that she so desperately needed would be harder to find.
She looked ahead and the inky darkness of the sky had begun to lighten. They hadn’t been gone long, or even reached the foothills yet, but she already felt a sense of calm. A calm that was not only from being in the wilderness she loved but also from being near the steady cowboy riding beside her.
This trip Ethan led them away from the ranch house via a different meadow. Once they entered the treeline he then headed toward a mountain peak to their left. The sky continued to lighten and the dawn birdsong began to fill the forest. Bridie glimpsed elk but didn’t stop to take photographs. Ethan might sit relaxed in the saddle, but their consistent and unrelenting pace suggested that until they reached their destination there’d be no halting.
Finally they reached a small clearing backed by a rocky slope. The peak they’d been aiming for was now an angular and dark void against a sky streaked in pale gold and orange.
Ethan dismounted and when the horses were secured she followed him along the slope. Midway up, he stopped, grinned and took her hand.
“Come on slowpoke, we’ll miss the show.”
With any other man, Bridie would have pulled her hand free and made her own way. But because it was Ethan, she let her fingers stay laced with his and didn’t protest when he helped her over the larger rocks.
Chests heaving and out of breath, they finally made it to the top. The early start and climb had been so worth it. He’d brought her to a mountain paradise.
“Oh Ethan ... this is ...” She stopped as words failed her.
“This is ... a first, you being lost for words.”
While his tone was light, Bridie didn’t miss the emotion thickening his words. She squeezed his hand that she still held. Just like when he’d found her in the games room and he’d made her smile, he was doing his best to again help her through her grief. And it was working.
She didn’t know where to look. A panorama of natural beauty stretched as far as she could see. To her left flowed a waterfall and to her right the sun would soon explode across the sky. She glanced at Ethan and saw him not looking at the waterfall or sunrise, but at her.
He touched her cheek with gentle fingers. “The world is full of beauty and happiness, Bridie; your father wouldn’t want you to only see shadows and darkness.”
She nodded and knowing speaking would be impossible, led Ethan over to where the rock flattened into a small seat. She sat and he joined her. She wasn’t sure if Ethan’s lips touched her temple or if it was the wind playing with her hair but then his arms settled around her. She relaxed into his side and sat still. The pebble he’d given her in the cave might still be in her jeans pocket but when she was with him she no longer needed it.
Not speaking, they watched as first one and then another golden ray spilled over the mountain peak and then the sun slowly ascended, filling the world with light. Bridie swallowed. Light ... and hope.
Ethan was right. It was time to embrace all that was good in life and to let go of all her loss. Just like her father had told her to do when she’d held his limp hand on that last day. He may no longer be with her physically but his love, wisdom and the lessons he’d so patiently taught her would remain.
Deep inside, her grief shifted and as it swelled and surged, she no longer fought it. This time when her tears came they slipped over her cheeks in silence, a slow, soundless torrent that drained away her sorrow and left room for only good things. Good things like laughter, friendship ... love.
Love. This time the shift within her wasn’t her emotions breaking free but instead it was a realization and an acknowledgment. All the feelings that she hadn’t trusted, or wanted to examine, weren’t by-products of her grief, they were ... real. Just like the sun throwing light across the natural landscape, now the darkness of her grief had receded, the view of her emotional landscape was clear.
She loved the sensible and gorgeous cowboy holding her.
“Bridie?” Ethan’s voice was a concerned rasp. “You’re sitting too still.”
She cleared her throat and swiped a hand across her wet cheeks. “I’m ... okay. I’ve said ... good-bye.”
His arm tightened around her. “I’m glad.”
“Me too. Thank you for bringing me here.”
She bit the inside of her cheek to stop herself from trembling at his touch. She was so close, Ethan wouldn’t fail to feel her every movement. With the knowledge that she loved him now came uncertainty and a new vulnerability.
Did he feel anything to
o or did he still believe they were incompatible? If he did feel something, could it last? He’d stepped outside his life to care for Henry, when he stepped back in and returned to his own ranch, would he feel the same? He’d shown her such care and concern but he was a decent man who’d been through what she was going through, would he help anyone out the way he had her? As for their kiss, did it mean as much to him as it did her? After all she’d been the one to instigate it.
She forced herself to remain still. Until she discovered the answers to such questions she couldn’t risk putting her still bruised heart on the line. She had to continue to hide the effect he had on her and now the depth of her feelings.
Her self-control caved in and she succumbed to the urge to move. She came to her feet, and not looking at Ethan, reached into the camera bag hung around her neck. “I have to take some photos.”
Ethan stood too and put his hands in his jeans pockets.
She snapped pictures of the sunrise and then walked over to her left to get a better view of the waterfall. The roar of the water was muted by distance but with her zoom she could easily see the water tumble over the rock lip and the reflection of the sunrise in the pool below.
She panned her camera across the pool hoping to catch some wildlife drinking. Something red flashed. She zoomed in closer and saw the unmistakable pattern of a man’s red and black shirt.
“Ethan?”
“What is it?”
She handed him the camera. “To the left of the rock pool there’s a man in the undergrowth wearing a red and black shirt.”
Ethan looked through the camera for a long moment. “I caught a brief glimpse, but he’s gone now.”
“Could he be the poacher?”
Brow furrowed, Ethan passed her the camera. “Maybe or he could be a photographer? That’s private land but people still trespass if they think they can get away with it. When I have signal, I’ll call Cordell and he can take a look. Beargrass Hills backs onto that land and Cordell has permission to visit.”
His Outback Cowgirl (Wildflower Ranch Book 4) Page 9
