by Sara Jolene
Otto was confused. She’d just said no, more than once.
“Yes?”
She nodded. “Yes. I said yes.”
He was still confused. “Yes to what?”
She smiled. “Your proposal.”
Chapter Eight
Otto was in shock. Had to be. Tecu was there next to Sophia. He could see them, even see his hands touching Sophia’s face, but he couldn’t feel them. As her words registered, elation took over his body. He was feeling so much he didn’t have room for things like touch. He was overwhelmed in the best way possible.
“Otto? Did you hear …”
Otto didn’t allow her to finish. He pulled her into his arms, holding her so tightly he had to remind himself of her fragility. “I heard. And I’ve never been happier,” he whispered in her ear. Otto felt a smile creep across her face as her cheek touched his. The need to feel her lips against his, to be even closer to her than he already was, was growing.
“How about we do it now?” He stepped from her and held her at arm’s length. “We can ride over to Bachelor and have Reverend Bing marry us right there at his church!”
Sophia laughed and her eyes lit up. “Oh, Otto. I do want to be your wife. But like you said, I’m trying to be different. There are things to consider. I can’t just leave Mrs. Sanderson … and then there’s one other thing.”
Otto was having a hard time believing they were even having a conversation about it. He wanted to marry her immediately. He’d never been more sure of anything in his whole life. He went to tell her so, but Tecu stepped on his foot.
Otto looked at the angel.
Tecu was shaking his head at him. “Do not do what you’re thinking of doing. You know better. I’m warning you, do not mess this up.”
Otto once again felt like raging at the angel but thought better of it. Not only would Sophia think he was completely crazy for talking to thin air, but he wasn’t sure that being angry with an angel was allowed. Probably wouldn’t be the smartest idea, either. He kept his mouth shut and said nothing to either Tecu or Sophia about how he was feeling. He just nodded at her. “We’ll make sure that Mrs. Sanderson is taken care of.”
Sophia had spent the better part of the night thinking about her life, Otto, and how the two would fit together. She had a strong urge to be independent and free, but when she’d allowed herself to, she’d started to feel something for the horse trainer. He was kind and compassionate, yet strong. The most intriguing part was that his kindness did not detract from his strength, and his strength did not deter his kindness. He’d found a way to make them both live harmoniously. She hoped one day she could do the same.
She’d spent a fair amount of time envisioning all the things she wanted for her life, and found that when truly honest with herself, Otto’s face had crept into each of those visions. She’d thought not just about who she wanted to be as a person, but what she wanted to contribute to life, to the town. She wanted to be someone others could depend on.
There was one vision—more of a wish—that she had replayed over and over again in her mind until she’d fallen asleep. They were in Otto’s kitchen. Someone had just left, and the two of them were standing there staring at each other for a long moment. Sophia was wearing a pretty, flowing white gown, and Otto was in the cleanest pants she’d ever seen him wear. Sophia could remember how her breath caught at the look in Otto’s eye, even though she knew it wasn’t real, that her mind had created the images. She held her breath and watched as Otto rushed to her, a burning, desperate man. Sophia gasped as his lips came against hers. They were soft but unyielding as he pulled her closer to his body. Before she’d been completely lost, Otto had released her. Holding her firmly but gently, he looked her in the eye. “Wife,” he said simply. She felt her response with her entire being. Almost felt she’d be ripped apart by it. She watched as the Sophia in her mind’s eye responded just as simply. “Husband.”
The next morning she’d woken up and was different. She knew she’d never be able to explain it to anyone. That no one would understand, but she’d known what she had to do.
She’d gone through her routine and ridden into town, saddleless and eventually terrified, to get to the man she knew would become her husband. The latest Archie sighting may have spurred her along, but she’d known long before. She just didn’t have the nerve. She had it now. Maybe too much in fact.
Standing there in the corral in his arms, she was tempted to see if his lips felt the same in real life as they had in her vision. She wanted to know if the way she felt had been real or if she’d imagined that, too. She closed her eyes and took deep, calming breaths that were soon overpowered by the sound of feet scuffing in the dirt behind her.
“She fits nicely, don’t she, Clay?”
The voice sent chills up Sophia’s spine. She felt her body shake in Otto’s hold as a few other voices joined in with the first as they laughed. Sophia didn’t want to look up. She knew who was there and had no desire to see him ever again. She fought the sick that threatened to rise from her belly.
“We’re closed at the moment, Mr. Grady. If you want to stop by this afternoon, I’m sure we can work something out.”
Sophia felt Otto shift his hands. He was trying to nudge her to move behind him, rather than in front where she was now. She realized she was closest to the fence. She was within arm’s length—and therefore, touching distance—of the slimy Mr. Archibald Grady, and Otto was trying to avoid him being able to get to her. Once she figured out what he was trying to do, she complied quickly. Without worrying about what anyone else was thinking, she scrambled behind him, trying to make herself as small as possible. She couldn’t stand the feel of having even his eyes on her.
“Clay, you’re a fool.”
Otto stiffened. Sophia put her hands on his back, letting him know that she was there and safe, hoping it would be enough to ease the tension she could feel tightening his muscles. “Not anymore, Archie. Now I suggest you take your leave.”
Sophia didn’t move. She listened closely as the men seemed to return to whatever mischief and mayhem they’d been up to before they came to bother them.
“They’ve gone.”
Bringing herself to full height, she kept her hands where they were as fear overcame her. She felt her legs wobble as she spoke softly. “Are you sure it’s me you want?”
She felt his muscles tense again under her palms. “Miss Perkins, if you do not start thinking better of yourself this instant, I’m going to …”
Sophia was very curious as to what he was going to do but couldn’t focus on that. He hadn’t answered her question. He’d never said that he wanted her or desired her. He had done nothing to make her think he did want her as a husband wants a wife, other than asking her to marry him. He’d asked, but for what reason? Did he want a helpmate like she was for Mrs. Sanderson? He could even just be trying to be nice and rescue her from herself. Did she want to know the truth? She wasn’t sure.
Sophia closed her eyes, squeezing them tight so that the tears that had started to form wouldn’t fall. Otto hadn’t started speaking yet. Her strength seeped into the silence, leaving her raw and exposed to the torment her mind was creating to fill the space. She inhaled sharply as her hands fell away from his back.
“Wanting you isn’t enough, Sophia. It never could be. You deserve more than just wanting.” He paused again, and the air, heavy with all her recently acquired strength, felt as if it would crush her. “Wanting you won’t ever be enough. But that’s no matter, because I plan to not only want you, but to cherish you and protect you. And if you’ll let me … I plan to love you.”
Sophia breathed in deeply, pulling the strength she’d thought she wouldn’t be able to recover back into herself. She was terrified that Otto already meant so much to her. Hated that she’d felt so weak in a moment of doubt. She promised herself she’d do better. She’d be better. She’d do as Otto had asked, and she’d think more of herself.
Otto was angrier than
he could remember being since that one cowboy at a rodeo down in Texas had gotten a thrill from trying to get the stallions riled up before leaving the gates. He’d almost gotten one of Otto’s best riders killed. The man had been bucked off and nearly trampled. Otto had never put his hands on another man before that. That night, he’d made up for it. He took that cowboy to board and made sure he wouldn’t be doing anything like that again. He wanted to do the same to Archibald. Problem was, in Creede, justice had a way of being subjective. As it turned out, the sheriff could be less than helpful if your name didn’t suit his needs.
He wanted to say so much more to Sophia but thought he should wait. She was trying to become her own woman, and he didn’t want to interfere with that. He paused a moment to see if Tecu would say anything, but when he looked around, he realized he’d gone. He turned to his future bride. “So how’d you get away from them?”
He watched as her big brown eyes grew larger and brightened. “Get away?”
He nodded. “Marigold’s saddle is gone, and you were racing here with them on your heels. Didn’t they stop you on your way into town?” He wasn’t sure he wanted the answer. If she’d been scared or had to defend herself, it was only going to make his anger more intense, but the fact that she could defend herself would be a bonus. She might need to at some point in this town. Creede wasn’t as bad as it had been, but it was still a wild, basically lawless town. They were trying to make things better. Royce Clark had a US Marshal come help out when his cattle were being rustled. That Marshal had made sure they had one close before he left to return to his own ranch in the south. Topaz wasn’t too far a ride, and if anything got too out of hand, someone could fetch him.
Sophia shook her head. “They started to approach me, and I took off running. Not even me, really, but Marigold. It was like she knew I was frightened.”
“I’m sure she knew.” Otto stepped over to Marigold’s side and ran a hand down her neck. “You knew to get her here, didn’t you girl?” He looked back to Sophia. “But her saddle. Why didn’t you put it on her?”
“I couldn’t. When I went out to the barn this morning, Midnight was out of her stall. After all the fuss of getting her calmed down and stowed away, I went to the tack room only to find that, though I’d only recently started to use the saddle, the straps had finally had their say and rotted through. I had no way to tighten it.”
“What about the other one? That one was in far worse shape, but it would have worked in a pinch. That’s why I left it there.”
Sophia once again shook her head. “That one, too. I had two choices this morning—I could have walked into town, or I could ride the way you did the other day. Despite how uncomfortable it was without a saddle, I’m glad I rode in. If I’d seen those men and hadn’t had Marigold, I’m not sure what I’d have done.”
Otto continued to pet Marigold. He didn’t want to think about what could have happened. He watched his future bride out of the corner of his eye and swore he’d not let her ride on her own for a long while. Not till they were married, at least. It wasn’t fool-proof, but men like Archie Grady would leave her be. Which got him to thinking …
“How about we walk over to the church? I hear that young preacher fella Eugene is starting to hold services there. We can talk to him about when we can get married.”
The way her face lit up made all the worry and anger he’d been allowing to brew within him to settle to a simmer. She was lovely, and the way the sun was hitting her dark hair made it shine and look like silk. He couldn’t wait to make her his wife.
Chapter Nine
Eugene Theodore was a small mouse of man. Otto was confused as to why such a creature would come out to a place like Creede to open a church. He didn’t seem the type.
Otto had been leery of Reverend Bing at first, but Callum had won him over. He was clearly made of sturdy stock, just as his sister was. Otto shook his head and laughed a little. That little woman put herself right in the middle of all those miners looking for a good time on payday, trying to persuade them to come to Jesus rather than a stiff drink. She was a handful, but that was a good thing. She could hold her own in towns like Creede and Bachelor.
The new pastor wasn’t very welcoming as Otto and Sophia made their way through the door into the space. He was shuffling around, moving what looked like bibles from pew to pew.
“Pardon the interruption, but we’re hoping we can discuss a few things with you.” Otto paused, narrowing his eyes. He lifted his hat off his head. “If you can spare the time,” he tacked on at the end.
Eugene’s annoyance was plain on his face as he set down the books he held and walked across the sanctuary to greet them. “Have we met?” He stared at Otto.
“No, sir, I don’t believe we have. I’m Otto Clay. I own the livery just down the way. If you’re ever in need of a buggy or a horse, I’m the one to talk to.” He turned to the woman by his side. “And this here is my fiancée, Miss Sophia Perkins.”
Eugene’s annoyance quickly turned to what looked like outright rage as he looked Sophia from her face to her feet and back again. He said nothing, just made a “tsk” noise that made Otto’s blood boil, then returned his attention to Otto.
Otto felt Sophia stiffen beside him as the preacher judged her. He felt horrible. He should have just hitched a buggy and driven up to Bachelor with her so they could have spoken to Reverend Bing. But being in the buggy alone with her wasn’t an option. It never would have been, but it was even more important now that most of the town had seen them embracing the other day. Plus, who knew what Grady had been running his mouth about in town. For all he knew, Sophia’s secret wasn’t a secret anymore. Otto stepped a little to the side so that Sophia was partially hidden behind him.
“You see, Reverend, Miss Perkins and I would like to make our affection for each other permanent, and we’re hoping you’d agree to marry us here, in our little town’s church.”
He already knew the preacher was going to say no. He just wasn’t sure how the spindly man would phrase it. Eugene’s eyes darkened, and a crease formed across his forehead that made him look more cynical than he’d already proven to be. He looked between Otto and Sophia, shaking his head. “I’m afraid that won’t be possible Mr. …”
“Clay. It’s Otto Clay.”
“Yes. That’s right, I remember now. Mr. Clay. As I said, that won’t be possible. However, you’re welcome to attend service this Sunday.”
Otto held his stance, staring at Eugene. The small man began to fidget. Otto smiled just a little at being able to make him uncomfortable. “I’m sure we’ll be making it to Sunday service. It's been a long while since either of us has been able to attend.” He looked around. “What with this church being closed up and Reverend Bing’s parish a good distance away. The folks in Creede have learned their own ways of worship.”
Eugene shook his head again. Otto wanted to hold it still. He wanted to teach the man that eye contact was important. “If that’s how you feel, I think we’re worse off than I thought. I’m not sure that anyone in this town understands the meaning of worship.”
The preacher began to turn from Otto.
“Before we take our leave, may I ask what the conflict is that we cannot be wed here?”
Eugene turned to face Otto after having retrieved the books he’d set aside when they’d first arrived. “Mr. Clay. I plan to keep this church and my ministry as pure and plain as possible.” He nodded his head at Sophia. “That woman has been soiled. You’d be doing yourself a favor if you set her aside and found a woman worthy of being a wife.”
Otto had known what the nasty man would say, but that didn’t mean it was easy to hear. He wanted to pop Eugene’s tiny head from his body and carry it down to where they’d been working to rebuild The Nugget and hand it to Grady. He’d make sure that Archibald knew that Otto was watching. That Sophia would come to no harm physically or emotionally. That if he even thought of laying a hand on her or even speaking to her again, he’d have a sim
ilar fate as the preacher. But Otto didn’t do any of those things. He calmly put his hat back atop his head, turned toward the door, and offered his future bride his arm as they left the building.
Her throat was dry and tears filled her eyes. She just wanted to leave. She didn’t want to let the preacher look at her that way. He knew. She wasn’t sure how he knew, but she could tell the moment his eyes touched her. She’d seen it before, back in Denver. The church ladies and the preachers would do what Millie did in Creede. They’d visit the saloons and other public places, trying to bring people to Jesus. They thought that because the folks were in those establishments, they were heathens that needed saving. Her uncle always chased them away, but it always made her feel worse about herself when they’d come. She’d never felt as bad as she did at that moment, though. She was sure the preacher’s warning would make Otto realize what he was doing, take the man’s advice, and set her aside.
“Eugene isn’t going to last long if that’s the way he’s viewing his ministry here.” Otto reached for her hand and brought it to rest in the crook of his arm as he escorted her from the church. “We’ll go see Reverend Bing first thing tomorrow. We’ll get married in Bachelor.”
Sophia’s heart constricted. He still wanted her. He was still going to marry her. None of it made a lick of sense. Her mind was a tousled mess. She had so much to think about. Her wants and needs were blurring, causing her head to start to throb.
“You really still want to?”
“Want to what?”
“Marry me?” She was too terrified to look at him. She was afraid of what she’d see. “That preacher, Reverend Theodore. What he said was true. I am soiled.” She felt the muscle in Otto’s arm tighten. “It is true. I don’t have to like it, and neither do you. Which is why I’m asking if you really still want to.”
