Finally, I am the one who looks away. Jeremy sighs and asks, “Are you hungry?”
“No,” I say. “I am actually cold.”
“I will turn the heat up,” Jeremy replies, standing up.
I follow him. “Actually, can I take a bath? That usually helps when I get chilled. Plus, it will be nice to have a moment to myself.”
“Definitely, I will do WHATEVER you want. If you need ANYTHING, just tell me, okay?”
Nodding my head, I mumble, “Yeah.”
“Cassandra brought over some more things for you. It’s in the bag over there. There are some actual pajamas. Then some clothes for tomorrow.”
My chest tightens and a tear runs down my cheek. “You are all too nice to me. I have done nothing to deserve it.”
“Isabelle,” Jeremy says, seizing me by the arms. “You are our friend. That is what friends do. Relax and let us help.”
Jerkily, I nod my head and whisper, “Okay.”
“Come, let’s get your bath ready.” He grabs my hand and pulls me down the hallway. When we get into the bathroom, Jeremy smiles, “I cleaned the bathroom while you were sleeping. So, you have a clean bathtub.”
“Aww, that’s so sweet,” I say.
He bends over and puts in the stopper. “How hot do you like it?”
“Near scalding,” I reply.
“Alright, I can do that,” Jeremy laughs. He starts the water and then stands up. “Oh!” He exclaims. “I have an idea!” I watch him dart out of the bathroom. I wait with raised eyebrows. Jeremy comes back in carrying two candles. “These are for when the power goes out.”
Snickering, I say, “Or when you have a girl over for a romantic dinner.”
“I don’t do romance,” Jeremy retorts.
“Yeah, right,” I laugh. “I see how gentle you are. You are so nice to me and do so many sweet things. You cannot convince me that you are not a romantic guy.”
Jeremy lights a match and brings it to one of the wicks. “I…don’t….do….romance,” he articulates.
“Well, you would be good at it,” I sigh. “You just wait. A girl is going to come along, who turns you into a pile of romantic goo.”
“I’d like to see this girl,” Jeremy snorts.
I grab his hand. “Why are you so closed off when it comes to girls?”
There is dead silence, as Jeremy stares at my hand. “Isabelle, there are some things I just don’t talk about. I care about you and feel like I can trust you, but there is some stuff that I don’t think I can share with you.”
Pulling my hand back quickly, I mutter, “Sorry.”
“Don’t be sorry,” he groans. “Ugh, I frustrate myself sometimes.” Jeremy turns and puts his hand on my face. “I trust you Isabelle, probably more than anyone else, but I am a very, very private person. I have some stuff….that just….hurts. Some stuff I have never shared with anyone, and I may never share it with anyone.”
Putting my hand on top of his, I whisper, “You will Jeremy. One day you will meet the person that makes you whole. You will be able to share that part of yourself with them. I promise you that.”
He comes forward and places his forehead on mine. “You are an incredible person. I am thankful that you are in my life.”
Every inch of me wants to kiss him. That sudden realization makes me jump back. “Oh my gosh.”
“What!?” Jeremy exclaims.
“Nothing,” I say, waving my hand. “Nothing. Random thought made me jump.”
Getting a wicked smile, Jeremy inquires, “What was the random thought?”
“I don’t have to tell you everything,” I snap playfully. I start shoving him out the door.
Jeremy braces himself on the door frame. “I want to know what the thought was.”
“No!” I say, shoving him as hard as I can. He of course doesn’t move. “I need to get more strength,” I finally gasp, giving up.
He turns around and says, “Tell me what the thought was and I will leave the room.”
Quickly I shove him and he falters back. “Ha!” I exclaim and slam the door. For the first time since everything happened, I laugh. When the tub is finally full, I turn the water off. I take off my clothes and look in the mirror. Grimacing, I see the bruising on my neck has gotten worse. I touch it and my body shivers.
Shaking my head, I climb into the tub. It feels good. I lower myself down so my head is barely above the water. Taking deep breaths I try to relax, but it doesn’t seem to work. Everything is just too much. I am so tired of crying! Will it never stop! Ugh, I wipe the tears away.
Then for no reason, or for so many reasons, I just start to sob. I sit up and bury my face in my hands. Everything comes flooding back. The fear, the pain, the sadness, it is all too overwhelming. I just cry and cry and cry.
There is a knock on the door. “Isabelle, baby, are you okay?”
“No,” I whimper. “I am sorry.”
“What are you sorry for?”
I shrug even though he can’t see me. “I don’t know. I am just a hot mess. I just can’t stop crying.”
“Draw the curtain,” Jeremy says. “I will be right back.”
Glaring at the door, I yell, “Don’t you dare come in here!”
A few seconds later, I hear, “Either draw the curtain or deal with me seeing you naked.”
With a snap, I close the curtain. “I feel like I am in a tomb now,” I say.
“Just wait,” Jeremy says. I hear him shut the door and once again the only light is from the candles. “Okay, take a deep breath and close your eyes.”
“What are you going to do?” I snap. “Don’t you dare open this curtain!”
I hear him sit down on the floor next to the tub. “Just close your eyes and trust me.”
“Okay,” I whisper apprehensively. Leaning back, I close my eyes and wait. My mouth twitches up into a smile when I hear him start playing. This song is very calm and serene. It is quite beautiful, and it doesn’t take long for my mind to be consumed by the music. When the song ends, I smirk. I draw the curtain back, just enough to poke my head out. “That was beautiful.”
“I thought you would like it,” Jeremy replies with a soft smile. He is sitting down against the wall opposite of the tub. “Not to be grossly inappropriate, but you look cute. Your hair is all in curls and damp.”
Laughing, I say, “Well your god like looks are sitting in a halo of candle light. It’s like a steamy romance novel cover.”
That makes Jeremy burst into hysterical laughter. “Sweet, my life is now complete.”
“Thank you for playing for me. I love to hear your music. It is calming and beautiful,” I say, as I rest my chin on the tub. “You are going to make some girl happy someday, because if you do this stuff for me, you will do amazing things for a woman that you love. You say you don’t do romance, but you are good at it.”
There is a little twinkle in Jeremy’s eyes. He looks at me thoughtfully. “There is only one other person I have ever been like this with before.”
“Aww, was she sweet?”
Jeremy just stares at me. I can see through his eyes that he is fighting something in his head. “Yes, she was very sweet.”
“What was her name?” I ask.
Taking in a deep breath, Jeremy says, “I won’t go any farther into that conversation.”
“Oh, I am sorry,” I mumble. “I didn’t mean to pry.”
“Isabelle, babe, stop saying you are sorry for everything. It’s okay that you ask questions. That doesn’t bother me.”
Sitting up a little more, I say, “But it bothered you when Debbie asked questions.”
“I am closer to you than I was Debbie. You are…well…my best friend. I feel like I can be honest and true in front of you and you won’t judge me.”
“No,” I whisper. “I would never judge you. I will never lie to you either, I promise that.” I bring my arms up and fold them on the tub, resting my chin on them. “I like that you are my best friend. I....care about you
a lot.”
Getting a smirk, Jeremy replies, “I care about you a lot too. Enough even to tell you if you move up anymore, you are going to give me a free show.”
I quickly dart down. “Oh my gosh!”
“I didn’t see anything,” Jeremy laughs. “Though I think you would look quite good naked. I have a theory that you have a rocking bod under all those loose fitting clothes that you wear.”
“Well, I have new clothes now. It will help show off my womanly parts.” My mind drifts to my clothes and to the lingerie bags. “Cassandra took me to lingerie store. The bags were sitting out last night. Do you think that had something to do with it? My mom said it did.”
“No, that creep knew exactly what he was going to do when he walked into your room. They were bras and underwear. It’s not like you had out a teddy and thigh highs.”
“How do you know that I didn’t?” I ask with a smirk.
“Sweet goodness,” Jeremy exclaims. “I want that shown off to me. That can be your rent.”
Laughing, I retort, “So I am going to put on peep shows to live here.”
“I wish. A peep show and a cup of coffee to start the day. That would be nice. So, are you putting that on the table as an offer?”
“Not on your life,” I reply. My hand starts to play with the water and I sigh. “I feel naked.”
Jeremy snorts. “You are naked.”
That makes me laugh. “I didn’t mean literally. I mean, I feel like I am exposed to the world. My mind keeps drifting to what could have happened.”
“I would be going to prison for murder,” Jeremy whispers. “I promise you that. Even now, if I see that guy, his ass is mine.”
I shake my head. “I hope I never see him again. I don’t know what I would do.”
“We are going to teach you how to defend yourself. I will give you a couple of days to get recuperated, but I won’t have you out there unprotected. I couldn’t deal with this again.”
“I am sorry; I didn’t realize it was such a big burden.”
Jeremy crawls over to the far side of the curtain. Obviously, so he can’t see in. “It’s not a burden. I literally want to punch someone in the face. I can’t believe I wasn’t there to protect you.”
Reaching up, I yank a towel off the wall. I cover myself up and open the curtain, so that we are face to face. “You couldn’t have been there to protect me. Neither of us knew he was even going to be there. I should have sent you a text, but you were out doing stuff. I have been up your butt every day. I didn’t want to bother you.”
With a pained look in his eyes, Jeremy leans in even further to me. “I want nothing more than to protect you.” He brings his fingers up and traces them down my face. “You said before that you are going to be my responsibility like it was a bad thing, but it isn’t. I want to take care of you. I want to show you the world that you have been denied for so long. You have a beautiful smile, and I love to see it.”
“I know I am not beautiful or gorgeous, but are the only person that has ever made me feel pretty, on the outside and inside.”
For a few seconds, we just sit there face to face, inches apart. I feel his soft breath kiss my skin. It sends shivers down my spine as I look into his eyes. Suddenly the thoughts in my head are too much and I pull back. “Thank you,” I whisper. “Thank you for everything.”
He looks down and nods his head. “I am glad that I can do it.”
“So, can I ask you a favor?” I ask hesitantly.
“Sure,” Jeremy replies with a smile.
Biting my lip, I say, “Tell me something about yourself. You know so much about me. You don’t have to tell me anything about your past. Just something, so that I can get to know you better.”
Jeremy glances up and hums, “Hmmm, what do I want to tell you?” There is silence as he obviously thinks. “Let’s see you are in high school. What can I tell you? I know, I have never been to a school dance.”
“Really? Why?” I ask.
Shaking his head, Jeremy says, “You get one fact. No questions.”
“So not fair!” I exclaim, laughing. “That’s fine. I have never been to one and doubt that I will.”
“Don’t you have any this year?” Jeremy asks.
I nod. “Winter formal and Prom, neither of which I will attend.”
“Why? We can get you a dress and make you all pretty.”
“No offense, but I don’t want to go by myself,” I mutter. “Everyone goes there with friends.”
There is just silence as Jeremy looks away. “Well, maybe you will have friends by then to go with. When is winter formal?”
“Like a little less than two months,” I reply. “It’s dumb.”
He chuckles, “Most stuff in high school is. Well, I should let you take the rest of your bath. Though I enjoy seeing you covered in a towel, with your hair all damp on your skin.”
“Pervert, gosh Jeremy!” I yell.
Snickering, he stands up. I make sure to keep myself very covered. He just takes a deep breath and laughs some more. “You know if you ever want to come in the bathroom while I am in it, you are more than welcome.” I glare at him and he smiles.
“I don’t want to see you naked Jeremy,” I articulate. Okay, I am lying. ISABELLE! Now, I am fighting to keep a straight face. With a wicked grin, he starts to lift his shirt off. “JEREMY!” I scream.
“What?” He retorts.
Pointing to the door, I say, “Get out of the bathroom if you are going to take your clothes off.”
“So, you want me naked in the living room. Surprise you when you get out of the tub?”
I roll my eyes. “I want you to keep your clothes on.”
“Mhmm,” he replies. “Most girls like seeing me without my shirt on.”
My hand covers my face. “Yes, you are hot without your shirt on, but I don’t want to see it right now.”
“See,” Jeremy laughs. “You like seeing me without my clothes on.”
“Is this the way it is going to be living with you? You pumping your own ego?”
Jeremy grabs his chest. “Ouch. Fine, I won’t tease you anymore.”
“Promise?” I ask.
“NOPE,” he emphasizes. “Sorry, comes with the territory of being my friend.”
My eyes just stare at him. “Can you get out of the bathroom now?”
“So you can have dirty thoughts about me?”
“JEREMY!”
“Alright, alright, I am going,” he exclaims, grabbing his violin. “Enjoy the rest of your bath.”
Sighing, I say, “Thank you.” With that Jeremy leaves the bathroom. Putting the towel on the floor, I lean back in the tub. My hands instantly come up to my face, because I start having dirty thoughts just like he said. What is my problem!?
A while later, I get out of the tub. After dry off, I open the door a crack. “Jeremy, can you bring me that bag with the pajamas? I want to put them on.”
“Yeah,” he returns. A few seconds later, he brings me the bag.
“Thanks,” I say.
“You need to eat. What do you want?” He asks.
Shrugging my shoulders, I reply, “I have no idea. Pick something for us.”
“Okay, I am going to run to the store. Do you want to come with or are you okay staying here? You can dead bolt the door. I have a key for that.”
“I don’t want to go out in public. My neck looks all messed up. I don’t want people to stare,” I reply.
Jeremy nods his head. “Cassandra texted me earlier and told me she was going to the mall to get you some stuff to put around your neck, scarves and such.”
“That’s so nice of her. You guys are doing too much for me.”
Suddenly scowling, Jeremy snaps, “If I hear you say something like that again, I am going to really bug you. Like, I will walk around the house naked all the time.”
“Okay, I get it, no more comments. I am going to put these pajamas on now,” I say.
“I will wait until you get out h
ere to leave,” Jeremy states.
I nod my head. “Okay.” Closing the door, I take a deep breath. I am going to be by myself. Am I going to be able to handle that?
When I walk out into the living room, I notice it is raining outside. “Eww, crappy weather to go out in.”
“Well, we need food and though I am made of sugar, I won’t melt,” Jeremy retorts. That makes me laugh. “It is great to actually see you smile.”
“Yeah, it feels good, too.”
Walking over to the door, Jeremy says, “I am going to leave. Lock both locks, okay? You can call me if you start to freak out. I shouldn’t be long.”
“Yeah,” I sigh. “I will try and not freak out. If I were at home, I wouldn’t feel safe, but I feel safe here. No one knows where you live.”
“I don’t care who comes to the door. Do not open it. I have a key. No more answering the doors for strangers, stranger danger.”
I burst out laughing. “No, I don’t think you have to worry about that anymore.”
“Good,” Jeremy says, opening the door. “I will hurry up and not take too long.”
“Okay.”
“Now, lock the door,” he commands, shutting the door. I walk over and immediately do it. To be safe I try and open the door and it is secure.
Then I just stand there for a while, staring at the door. Okay, I seriously cannot stand here the whole time. What should I do? With a shiver, I know what I need to do. It takes me a while, but I finally find my backpack in Jeremy’s bedroom.
Opening it, I am happy to find everything is still dry. Thank God, for waterproof material. I take out my sketchbook, and make my way back to the kitchen table. After I set everything up, I sit there for a while, just staring at the paper. Part of me is scared to draw Howard, like he is going to know where I am if I do it. I honestly am not sure if I want to see his face, again, but what Jeremy said rings in my head. I need to make sure he doesn’t do this to someone else. Taking a deep breath I grab a pencil.
It’s not as hard as I thought it would be. I remember him very accurately. Even with my vision blurring from him choking me, I guess you don’t forget what your attacker looks like. I don’t pay much attention to the time. As I am about half way through, I hear keys in the locks. It makes me jump up, and go into the kitchen. That way I can grab a knife if need be.
The Art of Life Page 21
