I bend over to run my hand across it. “How did you even do this?”
“I took your picture and had them scan it and then they put it on the side of the car.”
My hand goes over my heart and I fight back tears. “That is amazing.”
“Get in the car and I will show you more amazing,” he instructs.
Still in awe, I climb into the driver’s side, and Jeremy gets in the passenger seat. “Alright, you have a top notch stereo system, since you like to listen to your music at ear piercing levels.”
“I do not,” I gasp.
“Isabelle, I have put your headphones on at numerous times and I think my ears bled each time. So, either you like loud music or you’re deaf, either way, the stereo system will do. Now, to go with the neon lighting you have ambient lighting, but you can change the color on that. You have tinted windows obviously. Do you want me to go over the engine?”
Frowning, I say, “Not particularly.”
Jeremy sighs, “I figured as much. I will talk to the guys about it. So, what do you think?”
“It’s incredible,” I sniffle, and then I start crying.
“Why in the world are you crying!?” Jeremy yells.
Waving my hands, I stutter, “No, no, no, happy tears, no one has ever done anything this nice for me. I feel like I shouldn’t accept, but….I REALLY want it.”
“Well, that’s good, because it’s yours,” Jeremy declares. “Now, you need to take this puppy for a test drive. It’s stick because anything with a powerful engine needs to be stick.”
“I don’t really like automatic anyway,” I retort. Getting a huge smile, I ask, “Are you ready?” Jeremy returns the grin.
It is by far the most awesome thing ever. We kind of….blow off school. I honestly don’t care. It’s one day. Jeremy makes me get out on an old highway and shows me what the car can really do. Yeah, I realize we shouldn’t be doing that, but……
Finally, Jeremy drives to a park and pulls into a spot. “So, are you happy?”
“Yeah,” I reply, leaning my head on the back of the seat. “You have no idea. I feel like you are going over the top a little bit. You could have got me a beater of a car and I would have been happy.”
Looking at me with a very gentle smile, Jeremy says, “Isabelle, I have a boatload of money. I have never used it for anything, and I WANT to use it for you. I would do anything for you.” As those words come out, he glances back out the front window.
“Thank you Jeremy,” I whisper, taking his hand. He squeezes it and then rubs it with his thumb. We sit there for a while, just holding hands. “What do you want to do now?”
“Let’s go home.”
I lean towards him, “Okay, but move over. I am driving.”
The next day, I am super amped to drive to school. Who wouldn’t be? When I pull into the students’ parking lot, I get a lot of staring. So, I am a little self-conscious. When I get out, Eric and Jack come up to meet me. “Isabelle! This is tight! Better yet, this is freaking sweet!”
“Yeah,” Eric says smiling. “This was a great…gift, a super expensive gift at that. Do you like it?”
“I love it,” I squeal happily. “It is awesome. It has purple runner lights under the car. There is lighting on the inside that I can change the color different ways with a touch of a button. It has the best sound system ever! I will be going deaf in a few days, but what a way to lose your hearing. Jeremy said he will explain the engine to you guys later. It is an incredibly smooth ride. I am totally in love.”
“With Jeremy?” Eric asks.
Confused, I say, “No, the car. I am in love with the car.” Eric just nods. “Who wants to drive it at lunch time,” I quip, shaking my keys.
Jack raises his hand. “Oh come on, are you surprised?”
“No,” I laugh. “I figured you would.”
“Bonus,” Jack says, rubbing his hands together.
The ten minute warning bells rings, so we start to walk to class. Suddenly, Holly comes walking up to us. “Nice car.”
“Thanks,” I reply.
“So, I am asking everyone, what are you wearing to winter formal?”
Slowing down, I just look at her. “Winter formal?”
“Yeah, it’s in two weeks. Aren’t you going?” She asks.
“I don’t do school dances,” I answer awkwardly.
Turning around Jack says, “Come on, you need to come. Oh my gosh! If you come, I am driving with you! That is better than a limo.”
“Umm, I am not sure if I would even come to the dance,” I mumble.
“Why not?” Jack asks.
I pull my jacket around myself tighter. “I don’t know.”
“Mmm, I want to see Jeremy dressed up,” Holly sighs.
My eyes widen. “Oh, he REALLY won’t come to dances. Hell would freeze over before that would happen.”
“So, you would be dateless?” Holly inquires.
“Pretty much,” I retort. “So, no formal for me.”
Eric interjects, “Actually, none of us really have dates. Jack doesn’t, I don’t, a couple of other people. It will just be the group of us. You should come. It would be fun.”
“I will see,” I whisper.
When we get to our lockers, Holly and Jack leave. As soon as they are gone, Eric turns to me. “You should really come to the dance.”
With a little hesitation I say, “Maybe.”
“It will be fun,” he draws out, smiling at me.
“I will think about it.”
He moves over a nudges me with his hip. “Come on, you know you are going to go. I need to have at least a few dances with you.”
Those words make my heart drop. “You want to dance with me?”
“Of course,” Eric replies. “I heard you were a good dancer.”
“I wouldn’t say that,” I whisper, blushing really hard. “I will think about it. When do we have to buy tickets by?”
“Friday,” Eric replies. “How about this, I will buy you a ticket and it will be an open invitation. You can come, you cannot come, it’s up to you. You eat dinner beforehand, so I will put you in as sitting at our table.”
I nod. “Thanks, I will let you know what I decide.” The second warning bell rings, and I smile. “See you later Eric.”
“Bye Isabelle,” he replies, as I walk away.
My head spins for the rest of the day. When I get home that night, Jeremy is gone, but I really don’t think anything of it. I sit down at my desk and sigh. What do I do? Do I go? I would be on my own on this one. No Jeremy to hold me up. Am I ready for that? Come on Isabelle, you got a tattoo, you can do it. You have to learn to be independent from Jeremy. Nodding my head, I grab my cell phone, and text Eric: I’m going. The response I get is: Excellent!
A few minutes later, my cell phone rings. “Hello?” I answer.
“Hey girl,” Cassandra giggles. “The boys went out to play pool tonight, leaving us women to fend for ourselves and I was wondering if you wanted to have a girl’s night. And by girl’s night I mean going through bridal magazines with me.”
“Actually, I was wondering if you would do me a favor,” I slowly say.
“What’s that?” Cassandra chirps.
Taking a deep breath, I answer, “I need to find a dress to go to winter formal.”
There is a pause. “Jeremy is going to go to a high school dance?”
“Nope,” I correct. “Just me and my friends, but I don’t even know the first thing about buying a dress.”
“Ohhhh, we are going to have a fun night. I know this awesome website for formal wear. You will have to get money from Jeremy. I don’t have any extra right now.”
Smiling, I say, “I don’t think that will be a problem.”
“Okay, well, I will pick up Chinese food and be over in a little bit. This is going to be great!”
“Alright see you soon,” I reply. We hang up and I quickly dial Jeremy’s phone.
“Hey babe,” he answers. “I went o
ut with the boys and Cassandra is going to call you.”
I shake my head even though he can’t see. “I know, I already talked to her. I had a favor to ask, a big favor.”
“What’s that?” He asks.
“I know you have done a lot for me already, but I really want to go to winter formal and I need a dress, but obviously I don’t have the money for that.”
There is a pause. “You know....I am sorry…but I am not going to go with.”
“Oh,” I squeak. “I know. We are all going as a group. Not everyone has dates, especially Eric. He’s actually the one pushing for me to go, so I want to look REALLY good, because he wants to dance with me.”
A soft hum comes from the phone. “Mmm, I see. Well, when are you going dress shopping?”
“Cassandra and I are going to go on a website tonight and pick something out.”
“Okay, if you go into my closet. There is a stone box on the top shelf under my sweaters. Inside is one of my credit cards. Use that and get whatever you want,” Jeremy states.
Getting up and going into his room, I ask, “Are you sure?”
“Positive hon, get whatever you want. I want this to be perfect for you.”
The one thought that comes to mind is: if you were going it would be perfect. I quickly shake my head, and thank myself for not saying that out loud. “Okay, I got the credit card.”
“Alright, well it’s my turn to shoot, so I have to go, but I will probably see you later, unless the guys and I go out for some drinks. When is winter formal?”
“Two weeks from tomorrow,” I answer.
Jeremy replies, “Then you have enough time. Okay, have fun with Cassandra. Don’t get into too much trouble.”
“Okay.”
“Bye toots.”
I whisper, “Bye,” and hang up the phone.
Cassandra shows up a half an hour later. She is carrying a bag of bridal magazines in one hand and Chinese food in the other. “Oh this is heavy,” she says.
Grabbing the bags from her, I say, “Let me help then.”
“Oh!” Cassandra says happily. “Look at the ring.”
It is beautiful, and I say as much, “It’s gorgeous.”
“I know,” she sighs in return. “I can’t believe that I am getting married, but I couldn’t be happier.”
“Kent is a good guy,” I state seriously. “You will have a great marriage.”
Cassandra claps her hands, “Okay, we can keep talking, but I am starving, so let’s eat.”
We sit down and eat right away. I start to flip through the magazines and point out to Cassandra what I like. We seem to agree on a lot of styles and colors. She wants a very simple dress. After a couple of hours of looking at wedding stuff, we decide to go look through formal dresses.
Jeremy’s lap top is in his bedroom, so I go and grab it. We sit on my bed and I start it up. Cassandra looks at me. “Aren’t you a little worried you may come across something on here that you don’t want to?”
“Like what?” I ask.
“Ugh, stuff guys have on their computers. I am surprised with Jeremy being so private that he lets you use this.”
I can’t help but snort. “There is actually nothing that Jeremy and I don’t know about each other. We don’t hold things back anymore.”
Slowly, she turns and looks at me. “So, you know about his past? Like the mystery that is Jeremy, you know it?”
“Yup,” I articulate, “But I will never tell.”
“I wasn’t asking you to. I am just surprised, that’s all. It’s good that he finally has someone he can connect to. This doesn’t mean there is something going on between you two, right?” Cassandra asks curiously.
That makes me look to the side. “There is nothing going on. Trust me, there will never be something going on again. Not if I can help it.”
“Whoa, slow down, again? What do you mean again?” Cassandra says.
“Oh, nothing, never mind,” I stammer. “What’s the website?”
She puts her hand on top of mine. “No, fess up girl, what happened?”
“I don’t want to talk about it,” I mumble. “It still hurts.”
“What did that shmuck do?” Cassandra snaps.
Vigorously, I shake my head. “He did nothing. It isn’t anything he did on purpose. It was just a mistake.”
“Isabelle, you sound upset. I really think you should talk about it.”
I take a deep breath in. “A few weeks ago, Jeremy came home drunk. He was with another girl in the living room and I interrupted them accidently. So I came into my room to give them privacy. A few minutes later he was at my door. He sent the girl home, because, he said, her touch was hollow, or something along those lines. He asked if I ever just needed the touch of someone, of someone who matters. I got upset, because obviously that has never happened to me. The next thing I knew he was kissing me.”
“You have kissed each other before though,” Cassandra points out.
“Umm not with our tongues,” I retort. “We spent the night together.”
Practically screaming, Cassandra yells, “YOU HAD SEX!”
“No!” I exclaim, “No, no, no. I think he wanted to, but I said we needed to stop. I mean, we had on everything but his shirt, which, let me tell you, made it very difficult to keep my head straight. Anyway, we were fully clothed but it wasn’t all innocent. I have never experienced anything before, so it’s difficult to describe it.”
“Okay, but obviously he said something asinine to hurt your feelings about it.”
That makes me click my tongue. “Not exactly, it’s worse than that, he doesn’t remember.”
There is a really long pause. “Let me guess, you never told him what happened.”
Slowly, I shake my head. “What would I say? It would just make things awkward.”
“Isabelle, you should tell him.”
“No,” I state harshly. “He doesn’t need to know, but I am going to make sure it doesn’t happen again.”
We are silent for a minute and then Cassandra asks, “Was this before the night at the club?”
“Yeah,” I whisper.
“So, the look on your face when he went and kissed that girl, it was because of all that?” Cassandra inquires softly.
Wiping away a tear that I didn’t even know was there, I whisper, “I guess.”
“You care about him, don’t you? As in more than friends.”
I bite my lip and then shake my head. “No, no, it’s not like that. It was just one stupid night.”
“Mmmhmmm,” Cassandra hums. “Well, I think you should tell him. You shouldn’t have to hold onto this. It’s not healthy.”
“No,” I choke out. “I can’t tell him. He can’t know. Promise me, swear to me, that you won’t tell him.”
Sighing, Cassandra nods her head. “Okay, I promise.”
“I would rather him not know, than…..regret it,” I barely whisper.
“What if he wouldn’t regret it? Have you thought about that?” Cassandra asks.
The thought really has never crossed my mind. “I don’t think I have ever even registered that idea.”
“Tell him,” Cassandra urges. “He cares about you so much. Nothing has scared him off yet. I don’t think this would.” I slowly nod. “Answer me one question.”
“What?” I ask.
“How often do you think about it?”
My mouth opens, but I can’t speak. “I don’t understand…..”
“Just keep it to yourself, but I want you to really think about how it makes you feel when you think about what happened. Not his response, not what you are overthinking, but how HE made you feel. I think you are lying to yourself Isabelle,” Cassandra sighs.
There seems to be no words after that. We just sit quietly staring at the wall. Finally, I mumble, “What’s the website?”
“Here,” Cassandra says, taking the computer. “Let me show you how it’s done.”
We go through dress after dress. Some
of them are so bad we laugh until we cry, but then it’s like a light going off. We find the dress. I exclaim, “Oh, oh, oh, that’s it!”
“It’s gorgeous!” Cassandra agrees.
It is a purple ball gown. The top is a crystal studded corset and the skirt is wispy layers down to the floor. It is all marbleized deep, rich purples and violets. “Is it too much?”
“This is a formal right?” Cassandra asks.
“Yeah, there is a sit down dinner beforehand,” I reply.
Grinning, Cassandra says, “Then that’s the dress.”
She clicks on it and then my eyes bulge. “Dear lord, that dress is 600 dollars! Jeremy would kill me!”
“No, he wouldn’t.”
I am about to argue and then I stop. “Yeah, you are probably right, but he did just spend a lot of money on a car for me.”
“Yeah,” Cassandra agrees. “Where in the world did he get the money for that?”
“He saves really well,” I answer. “We are making payments. I am still going to call him about the dress.” Picking up my phone, I dial his number. It rings and rings and then I hear it pick up. There is just a lot of background noise. “Jeremy?”
There is some laughing and then, “Yeah, what’s up?”
“Umm, not to bother you, but I found a dress.”
“Uh huh,” he responds, as there is more laughter.
That makes me pause because it’s like he isn’t paying attention. “And I have been abducted by aliens.”
After a loud outburst of noise, Jeremy says, “What?”
Why is this aggravating me? “I found a dress,” I emphasize.
“A dress? OH, yeah, okay…….why are you calling me then?” He asks.
“Geesh, I didn’t know I needed a reason to call you,” I retort harshly, probably too harshly.
“Hold on babe,” I hear him say. There is a lot of background noise and then I hear silence. “Now, what’s going on?”
Almost pouting I reply, “I didn’t mean to bother you.”
Jeremy chuckles. “You aren’t bothering me. I just couldn’t hear you and a million people were talking at once.”
“Oh,” I say quietly. “Where are you?”
“The strip club,” Jeremy states.
Nearly dropping the phone, I yell, “You are at a strip club!?”
The Art of Life Page 44
