“How’s the singing going?” Dad asked when they were in the car.
“Fine,” Chloe said, as cheerfully as she was able. Danny looked at her in surprise.
“What about the con...” Chloe gave him a murderous look and he fell silent. After a few moments he said, “Do you know, I have to learn things called rudiments.”
“What are they?” asked Chloe’s mom.
“They’re all sorts of different rhythms I have to know. They have amazing names, like paradiddle, flam, and ruff.”
“Goodness.”
“They get their names from knitting patterns,” Danny added.
Chloe’s mom turned around in her seat and stared at him. “Do they?” she said. “How very odd.”
“They don’t really,” he admitted. “That was just something my friend Marmalade told me. He said his granny mutters words like that when she’s knitting.”
Chloe’s mom laughed. “It sounds as if you have lots of fun at this new school of yours,” she said. “I’m quite envious.”
Danny looked at Chloe and she smiled at him gratefully.
“Thanks,” she whispered as her mom turned away. He shrugged.
“It’s okay.”
It was great to be home. Ben came and bounced on Chloe’s bed to wake her the next morning, and she tickled him until he squealed. He was too little to understand all the complications of her life. He didn’t care what went on at Rockley Park School. He was simply happy to have his big sister home again, and thought she was perfect just the way she was.
Later on, Jess came over to see Chloe. Chloe had been so looking forward to confiding in her oldest friend, but Jess only wanted to hear about the famous people Chloe had met. She didn’t seem to realize how much her friend needed to talk.
“If I give you last month’s magazine, will you get Pop ’n’ Lolly’s autographs for me?” Jess pleaded. “They can sign beside the pictures of themselves. It’ll be really cool to take that to school. Everyone will be so jealous!” She settled herself more comfortably on Chloe’s bed. “Who else do you know?”
“Jess! ”
“What?”
Chloe looked at her friend miserably. “I need to talk to you. I’ve got a huge problem.” She hesitated, hearing her parents’ voices downstairs. “Not here. Let’s go for a walk.”
While they dawdled into town, Chloe told Jess all her woes.
“It’s not your fault,” Jess told Chloe stoutly. “It’s because of Mrs. Pendle. You can blame her.”
“But I’ve still got to find my voice,” Chloe said. “What if the teachers at Rockley Park don’t want me anymore? I wouldn’t blame them.”
Jess shook her head. “Well, I would. They’re supposed to be teaching you. They can’t just give up. You’re not giving up. Are you?”
“No!” Chloe bit back her tears. Part of her was almost tempted to give up the whole idea of being a pop singer. “I’m not giving up. But Mr. Player told me that I can’t be in a concert until I can sing properly. And, I really like Pop and Lolly, but they won’t want to be my friends if I’m a failure.”
“Why not?”
“Oh, Jess! Because they’re famous. And successful. And they won’t want to mix with failures.”
“Is that what they said?”
Chloe tried to be fair. “Well, no, but then, they don’t know why I’m not in the concert.”
“You mean you haven’t told them?”
Chloe’s face told Jess all she needed to know. “I couldn’t tell them,” she mumbled, scuffing a few dry leaves underfoot. “Or Mom and Dad.”
“Chloe, you’re so stupid.” Jess told her. “If you don’t tell people your problems, they can’t help.”
“I am telling you,” Chloe said, nearly in tears.
“Yes, but you need to talk to Pop and Lolly to get them on your side. How can they be friends if you don’t trust them? It’s horrible if a friend doesn’t tell you something important.”
They walked on in silence for a few minutes while Chloe digested what Jess had said. Chloe hadn’t told Jess immediately when she’d got her place at Rockley Park and that had really hurt poor Jess. Now Chloe had made the same mistake with her Rockley Park friends.
“Do you think I should text them?” she said.
“Good idea,” said Jess. “Say you’ll explain on Sunday night. Go on. Do it now!” Jess was always so enthusiastic. She was hard to resist. So Chloe dug the cell out of her bag. After a moment’s thought, she sent the text to Lolly. Chloe thought she was the calmer, more understanding of the twins. All Chloe could do now was to keep her fingers crossed for a friendly reply.
It was ages since Chloe and Jess had been shopping together. Chloe had almost forgotten how much fun it could be. They went into the music store and almost immediately Jess found something in the bargain section that made her giggle.
“Look!” she said. Chloe looked. Jeremy Player, On My Own Tonite, was the title on the CD. There was a picture of her teacher looking a lot younger, gazing soulfully into the distance. “Do you want to get it?” asked Jess.
“No way!” said Chloe, laughing. It was rather embarrassing to see Mr. Player on such a cheesy CD.
“Who else do you know who might have a CD out?” said Jess. She was like a terrier, sniffing out any hint of celebrity. Chloe told her about Judge Jim Henson.
“Will he be under H or J ?” said Jess, riffling through the racks.
“I don’t know,” Chloe said uncertainly. “He’s played guitar with lots of famous people over the years, but I don’t know if he ever made any records of his own. Don’t look under pop, Jess. He’s a rock musician!”
Jess moved over to rock. “Here!” she said, almost right away. “Judge Jim and Friends.” She waved the case excitedly, and Chloe took it.
It was him! Her friend, too. Judge Jim Henson! In the picture, he was sitting on a plain wooden chair with his old guitar, the one he’d been restringing the other day. He was smiling his warm, easy smile, almost as if it were just for her.
“Wow! I don’t really like rock music, but even I’ve heard of lots of these people,” squealed Jess, grabbing the CD again so she could read the back. “Eric Clapton, the Beatles, Jimi Hendrix—all these people playing with Judge Jim Henson. And you know him!” Chloe nodded. It was amazing.
Chloe felt renewed determination flood through her. She was almost part of this world. She couldn’t bear to fail now that she had a chance to make it as a pop star. She had to get her voice working properly. Her ambition was everything to her, everything!
In the park, Jess and Chloe tried the throwing-up exercise that Mr. Player had suggested, but by then they were in a very silly mood, and even Chloe couldn’t take it seriously, so they went on the swings instead.
It was good to spend some time away from her troubles, but later on, after Jess had gone home and Ben was in bed, Chloe decided to talk to her mom and dad about her singing problems.
“I’m supposed to sing from here,” she explained, putting her hands on her tummy to show them. “And when I do the breathing exercises Mr. Player has given me, I can feel the muscles working. But as soon as I sing I can’t seem to make them work anymore. I go straight back to singing from my throat.”
“But you did have a loud singing voice when you were younger,” Dad said. “I can remember you belting out things like ‘Happy Birthday’ when you were little.”
“Yes,” Mom agreed. “I used to wonder where you kept that huge sound. You were only seven or eight. You must have been using your tummy muscles then. It couldn’t have all come from your throat!”
Dad put his arms around Chloe and gave her a big hug. “I wish I could wave a magic wand and help you,” he said. “But I don’t know anything about singing. I’m sure it’ll come out right in the end, though.”
“I did want to sing in the end-of-term concert,” Chloe said sadly.
“You do as Mr. Player tells you,” Mom advised. “I’m sure he knows best.”
&nbs
p; “And don’t forget,” Dad said, “we love you anyway, whatever happens.”
It was good to know that her family was behind her. But as Saturday stretched into Sunday afternoon, a lead weight settled in Chloe’s stomach. It was almost time to go back to school, and still there was no message from Pop or Lolly. Nothing would stop Chloe from working toward her ambition, but it would be very hard to keep being cheerful if she’d lost her two best school friends.
9.
In Search of a Voice
It was so hard going back to Rockley Park not knowing what Pop and Lolly thought of her. Danny was as friendly as ever during the journey, but when they arrived Chloe chickened out of dropping her bag off at Paddock House. She didn’t feel brave enough to face the girls yet. She stuck with Danny and they went in for a snack together.
“So what’s going on?” he asked, chomping on a baguette. It had been obvious that Chloe hadn’t wanted to talk in front of her parents in the car and so he was still in the dark about what was wrong.
She took a deep breath. “I can’t sing at the concert because I can’t make my voice loud enough,” she said.
“Oh. Don’t worry.” He took another mouthful. Splinters of crust and shreds of salad fell onto his plate. Chloe stared at him.
“Don’t worry! Is that all?” she demanded.
Danny shrugged. “You’re in the right place to get all the help you need. What’s the problem?”
Chloe couldn’t believe it. Danny could be so dense sometimes.
“Rising Stars points, for a start!” she said.
“True,” he acknowledged, nodding. “But there will be other concerts. And my drum teacher told me that teachers’ decisions throughout the term are more important than the points awarded by the students at concerts. Anything else?” he asked, in his new capacity as problem solver. Chloe took a deep breath. Why was he being so irritating? He seemed determined to see her huge problem as a fuss about nothing.
“Only that I’m a failure and so Pop and Lolly probably won’t want to be friends with me anymore.” Chloe hated the way she was sounding so pathetic, but she was near to tears, and couldn’t help her voice wobbling. Danny put the remains of his baguette down and looked at Chloe.
“Who’d want friends like that?” he asked. “I wouldn’t.”
Chloe tried to explain. “That’s all very well, but—”
“Here, let’s ask them,” he butted in. “Hey, Pop! You wouldn’t stop being friends with Chloe if she couldn’t sing, would you?”
To Chloe’s horror, Pop and Lolly were in the dining room, coming their way. Practically everyone in the room must have heard what Danny had said! Chloe rubbed her eyes furiously and tried to look as if she didn’t care.
Pop banged her tray down on the table and plonked herself angrily into the chair opposite Chloe.
“Honestly! What a horrible thing to say, Danny!”
“What have I done?” Danny asked. “I was only—”
“Well, don’t,” said Lolly, putting her tray down quietly and sitting next to Chloe. “Can’t you see she’s upset?” She put her arm around Chloe and gave her a hug. “I’m so glad to see you,” she said. “Pop and I have been worried sick.”
Danny finished his baguette, pushed back his chair, and got up.
“Girls!” he muttered, and wandered off.
“We were at our house in Gloucestershire for the weekend,” Pop told Chloe. “It’s down in a valley. We can never get a signal for our cell phones there. It’s so boring. So Lolly only got your text on the way back to school.”
“That’s why I only texted you back an hour ago,” Lolly explained. “... And you didn’t read the message, did you?” she added, seeing Chloe’s face.
Chloe shook her head. “I switched my phone off and packed it in my bag this morning,” she explained. “After not hearing from you over the weekend, I thought you definitely wouldn’t text me today,” she added awkwardly.
“And after what Tara said on Friday, we were afraid you’d disappear and we’d never see you again!” added Lolly. “You did mention not being able to use the right muscles for singing at the beginning of the term, but we thought that had been fixed.”
“Is it still the same problem?” Pop asked.
Chloe told them all about it. It felt good unburdening herself to the twins. When she’d finished, Lolly gave her another hug.
“We didn’t realize it was so serious,” she told Chloe. “You poor thing, suffering all this time in silence. You should have said something.”
“I know,” Chloe admitted sheepishly. “Jess talked to me about that. And don’t be mad at Danny for what he said. It’s my fault. I really was scared that if I couldn’t sing, you might not want to be friends anymore.”
“Huh!” snorted Pop.
“Sorry,” Chloe said in a small voice.
“Don’t worry,” Lolly said. “Some people really are like that.”
“We liked you right away because you were so ordinary,” Pop told her.
Chloe couldn’t help smiling. “Thanks!” she said.
“No, really!” said Pop. “You know what I mean. We meet so many people who only want to be friends because we’re well known. We’ve gotten careful about hanging out with phonies. They only let you down.”
“Sometimes they’re quite hard to spot,” Lolly said. “So I’m not surprised you were wary of trusting us. But we’re not phonies, and we want to help. Tell us what to do and we’ll do it!”
Chloe smiled a lopsided smile. If only it were that easy.
They finished their snack and went over to Paddock House. There was no sign of Tara.
“I saw her going over to the practice rooms as we arrived,” Lolly said. “I don’t think she went home over the weekend. Her parents are often abroad.”
“We’ve got to get you singing somehow,” Pop insisted. “I’m sure we can do it.”
“But how?” asked Chloe. “Everything I’ve tried so far just makes it worse. I’m afraid I won’t be able to stay here if I don’t work this out soon.” The twins had made Chloe feel so much better, she was beginning to think this fear was groundless, too. But Lolly took it seriously.
“Has Mr. Player said anything like that?” Lolly asked. Chloe shook her head.
“No.”
“I expect he doesn’t want you to panic,” Pop said.
“Don’t worry,” said Lolly. “You won’t get thrown out in your first term. If it was near the end of the first year, it might be a bit different.” Chloe felt the fear come creeping back. Surely it wouldn’t take that long to find the volume she needed!
“It’s not as if you have to learn how to sing,” mused Pop. “It’s just that your voice is too quiet.”
Chloe nodded sadly. “Yes, someone told me that even a baby can cry out loud without being taught and that it’s my mind that’s stopping me.” Pop clutched Chloe’s arm.
“That’s it! You need something to get you to yell out loud without thinking. Maybe that would unlock your voice.”
“Mmm,” agreed Lolly. “That’s not such a bad idea. Perhaps if someone scared you, you’d yell, and then you could turn the yell into a song.”
“Do you think that might work?” Chloe looked at their anxious faces. “I’ll give it a try,” she added bravely. “As long as you don’t give me a heart attack!”
“Lolly and I will plan something for you,” Pop assured her in a spooky voice. “Prepare to be v-e-r-y scared!”
10.
Alarms and Decisions
It wasn’t long before a huge Christmas tree went up in the main hall. Some people had brought decorations from home and hung them around the homework room to cheer it up. The whole atmosphere in the school was changing as the term galloped on toward Christmas. Everyone was getting more and more excited about the concert, and rehearsals were going on in every available practice room. Even Judge Jim’s usually quiet courtyard often had someone there, trying a new riff on guitar or singing the same phrase over
and over again. It was difficult for the teachers of the usual school subjects to get the students to concentrate.
“There’s more to chemistry than hair products!” Mrs. Pinto complained one day when several boys wouldn’t stop talking about which gel was best to produce seriously spiky hair for their performance.
Although Chloe was the only student in her grade not taking part in the concert, she was just as jumpy as everyone else, but for a different reason. Pop and Lolly had enlisted everyone’s help in their scheme to help Chloe find her voice, but far from helping, it was fast turning her into a nervous wreck.
The favorite ploy was jumping out at her, and Chloe was getting mighty tired of being ambushed everywhere she went. She took to spending time in the recording studio, where Mr. Timms wouldn’t tolerate such behavior. Although she wasn’t allowed to do much, she loved just sitting in a corner and watching the vocalists, who stood alone in the small booth while they sang into the microphone. She could see what an important partnership it was between the performers and the engineer if a really good recording was to be made. But she couldn’t stay in the recording studio all the time, and even going to bed wasn’t safe ... One evening Tara put a huge, black spider on Chloe’s bed. Chloe didn’t like spiders very much, though she wouldn’t normally have been terrified. But as it set off at a canter over the quilt en route for Chloe’s pillow, Pop let out a tremendous scream. She cowered in a corner pointing at Chloe’s bed. Chloe assumed it was another trick and didn’t take too much notice, but then Lolly started too.
“Ssspider. Chloe. Spider! ” Lolly wasn’t that good an actress. Chloe glanced down to see the thing just about to run over her hand. She jumped up in a panic, and the poor spider hurtled over the edge of the bed and dropped to the floor with an audible plop. Pop and Lolly took ages to calm down. They totally refused to go to bed until Mrs. Pinto had retrieved the poor creature from under the bed. The housemother had to get down on her hands and knees and catch it with a postcard and a glass, while a giggling Chloe shone a flashlight so she could see what she was doing.
The next day, at lunch, Marmalade put a large black beetle on Chloe’s tray while she wasn’t looking. It ran out from under her napkin while she was carrying the tray, and her nerves were so jangled she dropped the whole thing!
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