The rotten smell of her body almost makes me gag, but I fight against the urge.
“What did you do?” Sherri asks, her always quiet voice piercing the silence that has enveloped us.
I’m hit by another wave of urgency. I need to find Tasia now. She needs me.
“Rynne!” Blade snaps. “What the hell?! We don’t know how many thralls that thing made! And now they—”
Something is wrong. I bolt out of the room. Blade calls after me, but I don’t stop. Whatever’s going on with Tasia can’t wait any longer. I’ve already made her wait long enough. I should have left sooner.
WHAT’S HAPPENING? Arsen suddenly let me go and now he’s on the ground screaming. It’s just the two of us here and I know I didn’t do anything. I stare at him, carefully watching his every move, but he doesn’t seem to be faking it.
Now’s my chance.
I find the silver knife he took from me and threw onto the floor. It’s a couple feet away from him. I just have to grab it and aim for his heart. I have to… I have to carve it out of his chest.
Arsen has stopped screaming. He’s trying to get off the floor, but he’s having a hard time. I have to hurry. I reach for the knife, but as soon as my fingers come into contact with the silver hilt, I feel what seems to be an electric shock. It surprises me, and I drop the weapon.
That’s when I make my mistake. I turn to look at Arsen and our eyes lock. I can’t look away from the penetrating green. The color is so pure. I wonder if this is what green is supposed to look like. I can’t even blink. Holding his gaze makes me feel… something. I should be scared, disgusted, or I should feel something dark and evil, but that isn’t the case at all. Looking into his eyes, I feel like I’m at home, like my heart exists in those eyes.
My legs start moving on their own. They take me closer to him. One step at a time. But I’m completely unarmed. He’s sitting up, struggling to get to his feet. I try to fight against my body, but all I manage to do is trip and fall forward. I expect to hit the icy concrete in front of me, but warm, strong arms catch me instead. I’m on my knees, my body half slumped into Arsen’s. He never made it to his feet and now he’s leaning into me, using me for support just as much as I’m using him.
It’s strange. All the fear and anger I was feeling fades away, like those emotions exist far away from here, far away from Arsen’s embrace.
Embrace.
He has his arms around me, bringing me closer to him. I take in his scent as I press my nose into his neck. His smell is familiar, like the freshness of the earth after a cleansing rain. His touch feels safe, and I know there’s nowhere else I want to be but in his arms. There’s nothing else—
“What’s happening to me?” I feel a disconnect from my thoughts to my words. I’m not even sure if what I’m saying is understandable. “What are you doing to me?”
I know in my head something is wrong. I know I shouldn’t be enjoying this. I shouldn’t be taking him in like this, but my body refuses to listen to me. I feel a deep vibration emanating from Arsen’s chest. Then I feel the warmth of his lips brushing against my cheek. I’m not sure what’s happening. I’m not even sure if I like it anymore.
Arsen moves before I get a chance to. He pulls me up alongside him as he gets to his feet, but instead of keeping me close, he retreats from me. He vanishes like a ghost into the shadows.
“Tasia! Tasia where are you!”
“Rynne?” I mouth his name more than say it. Then I speak up and shout, “Rynne!”
The wind has quieted. That’s how I was able to hear his voice. He’s inside the warehouse within seconds. He wraps his arms around me and hugs me so hard I almost can’t breathe.
“Rynne!” I gasp. “You’re squeezing too hard.”
He loosens his grasp immediately; he stops hugging me altogether. He starts inspecting me instead, walking around me. “You look okay,” he says. “What happened? You weren’t at the base. I thought…” He shakes his head. “He was here wasn’t he? Did he hurt you?”
“I’m fine,” I assure him. “How did you find me?”
He averts my gaze. “I went to the base to find you, but you weren’t there. So I panicked and started looking around. I was lucky.”
“Why were you trying to find me? Is something wrong?” I feel the familiar crawl of fear tingling inside my body.
“I… it’s nothing.”
“Did something happen to Fiona?”
“No, no. Everything’s fine. Everything’s fine now. We need to head back to the base.”
I’m too tired to dig for more information. I feel like myself again, but those feelings I had before, the way I enjoyed being close to Arsen, like it was completely natural, like I knew him, like I cherished him… I shake my head. Those aren’t the kind of feelings something evil can evoke inside of you. They’re good, true, and beautiful feelings. It was just a momentary lapse of sanity. That’s all it was. It doesn’t change anything. Arsen killed my parents and many others. He’s a demon playing a game, messing with my feelings like that. That stunt he pulled was all just an act. I place my hand over my black diamond, buried under my layers of clothing, and seek reassurance. But I’m lost.
I LEFT TASIA BEHIND. That made angel was searching for her. I could have stayed and taken him out. Maybe I should have snatched Tasia and taken her away with me. My beast wanted to, It still does, but my logician insists that would be unwise.
None of that matters right now, though. Yuki’s battling at least one angel. She’s capable, but I don’t know what kind of angels have been following Tasia around. I’d rather not lose Yuki. My beast and logician both agree on that.
I hone in on Yuki’s presence. Her aura is still glowing brightly, so I can at least say she isn’t dead. Quickening my pace, I move as fast as the body of my logician can manage. The closer I get, the farther away the angel presence is. The fight must be over and neither one was killed. Yuki’s immobile.
Finally, she’s in my sights. She’s leaning against one of the warehouse walls, hidden in the shadows, holding her stomach and trying to stanch the blood gushing out of it. There’s a silver sword in her hand. She must have just barely pulled it out. She discards it as I rush up to her. Her legs are trembling and she almost falls forward, but I catch her. As I support her, I bring my other hand to her back. The sword pierced all the way through her stomach. She’s healing, but the burning and lingering sensation of silver is making it painful. She’s sweating and shivering, but it won’t last much longer. She has plenty of life essence to spare, so I simply hold her.
“You should have killed her,” Yuki tells me.
She pushes against me with agitation, but I refuse to let her go. She stops fighting after a moment. She never could bring herself to fight against me for long.
Once I’m sure she’s done struggling, I pick her up into my arms and carry her away into the night. Slowly, she wraps her arm around my neck in a sort of reluctant contentment. I use the cover of night to get us back to our hotel unseen. I don’t bother with the front door and climb up the fire escape instead, entering our room through the window.
When we’re inside, I place her on the bed. I dig through our clothes and provide a blood free set for the both of us. Yuki starts changing without a word, and I do the same. Her wound is almost completely healed now. All that’s left is a trace of a scar.
Yuki sits back down on the bed when she’s done changing. She looks at me, clearly wanting to talk.
“What?” I ask.
“What was that for?” she retorts. “You didn’t have to carry me…” Her voice trails off as she brings her gaze to the window.
“You almost got killed by an angel.”
“I had her on the run.”
“You had a silver sword pierced clean through your stomach.”
“And I had her on the run.”
I sit down on the bed beside her.
“You know I’d do anything for you, right?” she whispers.
“I kn
ow.”
“I’d kill that human for you, but you won’t let me, despite what she does to you. If that angel that attacked me is all the muscle they have around her, I could kill her. Easily. We could have killed her easily! Why didn’t we, Arsen? Why didn’t you?”
I feel the static of irritation prickling on the back of my neck, but I attempt to ignore it. “I don’t want her killed,” I say icily. “I don’t know what the angels are planning with her, but I don’t want her killed.”
Yuki turns her head away from me. “You don’t want her killed? You act as if you’re in love with her. I saw you two in there. What was that? You’ve never even laid eyes on her before until this October, when we were in Reverie. You can have any human or demon you want, Arsen. Why does it have to be that one? Is she really that irresistible? And, if she is, how do the angels know that? She doesn’t seem like anything special to me. I don’t feel what you’re feeling. I don’t understand any of this.”
I don’t want to talk about this, but if I don’t say something to Yuki now, I never will. My logician urges me to explain the situation. My logician reminds me that what Yuki says is true. If I’m going to get out of this, I’ll need help because I obviously can’t do it myself. My beast won’t let me. My logician even recommends I let Yuki kill Tasia, but my beast shuts that thought down before I can dwell on it for long. Every time I’ve been confronted by Tasia, I’ve shut down. I don’t understand any of this either.
I don’t want to talk.
I move behind Yuki and wrap my arms around her. She turns her head in my direction, reacting exactly how I want her to. I plant my lips on hers as I bring my arms to her stomach, lifting the bottom of her shirt so my hands find her now completely healed, and perfectly smooth, skin underneath.
“Arsen.” I can hear in her voice that she’s trying to sound stern, but I’m making that hard for her to do. She never could resist me. “Tell me what’s going on,” she whispers the words in between kisses.
I don’t want to talk.
I kiss her more fiercely, dispelling any chance of her talking again. My logician guides my actions in anger against my inability to kill Tasia earlier. She’s the one I want to be close to. My beast takes no pleasure or part in this interaction with Yuki, but my logician knows this is what Yuki wants. She’s been wanting this and I’ve been close to non-receptive lately because this is the part of me that’s always come from my beast and my beast hasn’t been interested in anything but Tasia.
Yuki catches my face in her hands, giving herself a moment to breathe. Then she does something she’s never done with me. Maybe she senses my lack of passion. She uses force, pushing me down onto the bed so that she’s lying on top of me, in the position of power as she takes the lead. I don’t know what’s worse, the fact that she’s demanding dominance or the fact that I’m allowing it. I follow her every move, giving her exactly what she wants while disregarding my own physical desires. I’ve never engaged with her like this just to provide her physical pleasure. In the end, I’m still not doing this for her.
Now I can talk. “I need your help,” I say.
“Don’t talk yet,” she replies, guiding my hands to where she wants me to touch her.
I comply and I keep my mouth shut. I suppose I owe her that much.
By the time Yuki’s had her fill, we’re both lying naked underneath the sheets. She stays close to me even after all of the sexual tension is gone. She rests her hands against my chest as I let one of my arms lazily drape across her back as I absentmindedly catch her hair in my fingers.
“Just a little bit longer,” she whispers. “Stay like this.”
I kiss her lightly on the nose, but I keep my words and thoughts to myself. She snuggles up even closer to me, like she’s afraid I might disappear any moment.
“You need my help?” she eventually asks.
“Yes.” I keep my voice quiet. “I need to find the witch.”
She shudders. “Are you sure?”
“I wouldn’t seek her out if I thought there was a better way.”
She kisses me. “Just forget about that girl and stay with me. You’ve stayed with me for the past eighty-one years. Nothing needs to change. We can continue doing what we’ve done. We can kill any angel that crosses our path. Just forget the girl.”
“You know I can’t. I’ve tried. I need you to send word for the witch while I return to Reverie.”
“You think going back to Reverie will help you?”
“It’s possible.”
Truthfully, I’m desperate. I’m not sure I’ll learn much of anything from Reverie. I’m not even sure Helena will see me, but I don’t know what else to do. I need to put this space between me and Tasia just as much as I need her near me. It’s time I did everything in my power to get answers, to break this connection—something! If I continue to stay close to her like I have been, I’m going to end up dead, and I don’t want to give the angels the satisfaction.
I WALK BESIDE RYNNE on our way back to the base. I pull my coat around me, more out of shame than to fight off the cold. Arsen was right there, defenseless, and I couldn’t bring myself to finish the job. I couldn’t bring myself to avenge my parents.
Rynne comments, “You haven’t said a word. What are you thinking?”
I ask, “Just how hard is it to kill a demon?”
“It depends.”
“But is it hard for you to kill them?”
“The mentor I was with died to see to a demon’s end. It’s very hard.”
“Do they play with your emotions to make you feel like you don’t want to kill them? Can they manipulate happy emotions?”
Rynne glances back at me. “Is that how Arsen made you feel? Happy?”
“I-I guess,” I confess. “But then I came back to my senses.”
“Demons have the power to taint people with darkness.”
“But darkness isn’t what I was feeling.”
Rynne goes silent.
“He did something to me,” I whisper. “When I was in there with him, it was like my hate disappeared and was replaced by that warm feeling you get in your chest when you see someone you…” I swallow. “See someone you love.”
“It wasn’t love. It’s like you’ve been saying. He’s manipulating you. Hold on to the truth.”
“But what is the truth?”
“Arsen is a demon. He doesn’t deserve your pity, and he certainly doesn’t deserve your love.” There’s an edge in Rynne’s voice that I’ve never heard before.
But he’s right. What I’m saying… it’s complete nonsense. Whatever Arsen did to me messed with my head. That must have been his plan all along. He’s playing with me. Everything that happened back in that warehouse was all an act. He was never vulnerable. He’s just getting a high off of the hunt. He’s getting a high by ruining my life and by degrading my mind. Next time I see him, I won’t hesitate. I won’t let him control me like that ever again.
We’ve passed multiple warehouses and now we’re coming up on the base. There’s an unusual amount of activity out front.
“Tasia! Rynne!” Fiona exclaims as she abruptly stops saying whatever it was she was saying to the hunters in front of her.
She cuts through the hunters to get to me and Rynne. For a moment, I think she’s going to hug me, but the relief on her face is eclipsed by a furious scowl. She’s so angry. I think I can see a glimmer of red in her almost coal black eyes. If I wasn’t in trouble before, I am now.
“Where were you both?” she demands. “Rynne, you just ran off without any explanation, and then when I came back to the base, Tasia was gone, too. Someone had better start talking.”
“I found Arsen,” I say.
Fiona’s face pales to a color I’ve never seen on her dark skin.
“I’m not hurt,” I add, “and that’s probably thanks to Rynne.”
Rynne shakes his head, but he doesn’t say anything.
“I can’t believe this,” Fiona says, exasperated. “Both of
you, get inside.” Then she turns to the other hunters outside of the base. “Everyone go back to your business.”
When we’re safely inside the lobby, I shed my backpack and coat. I sit on a bench and wait for Fiona to get back to her disciplining. I know there’s no point in trying to avoid it. Besides, I deserve it. Arsen played me so easily. It’s amazing I haven’t died yet.
Rynne sits beside me as Fiona walks over to us. She addresses Rynne first. “You killed that vampire. You didn’t even give her the chance to consider offing her thralls. Now hunter teams are going to have to comb through Philadelphia to kill them instead. You left your team without any explanation. You were off your game tonight. I’ve never seen you so unfocused. It’s like your mind was somewhere else. Teamwork is about communication, following your team leader, and looking out for your teammates.”
She sighs. “You might know a lot about hunting, but I might have prematurely placed you in Gold Team’s ranks. Or maybe I’ve just been working you too hard. I’m taking you off the team and all missions until I say otherwise. Focus on recharging. Think about your actions. I will give you another chance, but it will be your last. We have no use for those who aren’t willing to work in a team.”
“Understood,” Rynne replies.
“I don’t know how you found Tasia first, but thanks for looking out for her,” Fiona adds begrudgingly. I can’t tell what she really thinks about him finding me.
“Tasia,” she says, turning her attention onto me. “You snuck out of your room and attempted to take Arsen on all by yourself. Never mind the fact that you’ve never been on an actual mission before, you tried to do this by yourself. No one in the EEA fights alone. We have team units for a reason. Our teams keep us safe. You’re lucky you weren’t killed.”
She sighs again and brings her right hand to her forehead, trying to smooth out the scowl that hasn’t left once since she started lecturing us. “Go to your rooms,” she says. “Neither of you are allowed to leave your rooms until I say so.”
Hearts Lie (Undying Love, Book 1) Page 25
