With a final leap, he hurled himself into consciousness, flinching at the invasion of bright hospital lights on his sensitive eyes.
“Kasper!” As before, the image of her was blurry and gray. Still, she was the most beautiful thing he had seen in a long time. “I’m sorry.” She laughed nervously and made a movement across the room he couldn’t identify. “I didn’t mean to wake you. I mean, I’m happy that you’re awake, obviously.” As his eyes focused, Kasper watched her wipe her face with a fresh tissue. In spite of how swollen and red they looked, Kasper couldn’t help but stare into them.
“I am glad it was you,” his attempt at a smile turned into a grimace, “who woke me.” At least they took that damn oxygen mask off, he thought. Now, however, large uncomfortable tubes had been placed inside of his nose, spilling air into his system. Newly motivated by the sight of his bride, Kasper reached for them easily, resisting the urge to pull them away when he saw Emilia frown.
“Aasif said you were awake a little while ago, but I didn’t believe him.”
Kasper struggled to sit up, reaching for the plastic cup of water on the shelf, the taste of it not unlike liquid char when it slid down his throat. Regardless, he felt considerably better.
“Are you all right?” he croaked with his new found strength. “W-Where were you?”
Frowning, she put a finger to his lips to silence him. “I took Nefertiti riding. I didn’t even know what was happening until after I smelled the smoke.”
His expression immediately relaxed. “You’re okay?”
“I’m fine.” Emilia smiled, and the entire room seemed to light up. Why should she have been surprised that his focus remained solely on her? At any rate, her smile did not last for long. “Did Aasif explain to you what happened?”
Kasper shook his head. Even if he had, the details had been lost on him.
“I—I think it’s better to tell you this while you’re,” she smiled nervously and gestured to his body, “incapacitated.” Kasper watched her every move as she struggled to find the words, the twiddling of her thumbs to the way she bit her lip making him feel a form of gratitude he was sure he had yet to experience. Several times over the years, Kasper had put both of their lives in danger, and somehow they were alive, moving, and still in love.
It was nothing short of a miracle.
“Cyrus was desperate, out of money, completely obsessed with getting revenge on us,” Emilia scoffed and used air quotes for emphasis. “H-He tracked down my mother.”
The incessant beeping increased tenfold and Kasper saw red. “What?”
Emilia nodded, glancing at the machine at his side before resting her hand on his leg. “Apparently cutting the brakes on your car was her idea. Can you believe it? The woman can’t manage a checkbook but she thinks she can be some criminal mastermind?
For the briefest of moments, Kasper was amused by Emilia’s obvious anger. When he realized just how much this revelation disturbed her though, he placed his hand on top of hers and tried to focus.
“How do you know?” he asked
“Frankford has friends at the police station. They let him sit in on the interrogation. It only took twenty minutes before my mother told them everything. Cyrus told her that with you gone, I would inherit everything and could pay off her debts. Obviously, Cyrus would get what he wanted…”
Kasper cringed at the repeated use of his enemy’s name, but miraculously managed to hold it together. He clicked his jaw against the sound of the machine that he now realized was monitoring his heart rate until it slowed to a normal rate.
“Where—?”
“Back in prison,” she said hurriedly. “Maximum security this time. Solitary confinement.”
Of course Kasper knew that wouldn’t be an efficient long-term solution, but considering he could barely sit up, now was not the ideal time to make the necessary phone calls that would end his cousin.
“He started the fire,” Emilia continued quietly. “Surveillance cameras got him buying gasoline on Christmas Eve. Between the Christmas tree, curtains, and books—”
Kasper threw his hands up in a mock explosion. “Poof.”
“Apparently poinsettias are also very flammable. I swear I’ll never buy them again! I’ll never even look at one! I’m so sorry, Kasper. You were right about everything.”
“No,” he insisted. “Not everything.”
Kasper smiled at the look of confusion on her face, admiring it greatly prior to reminding himself how essential it was to get his feelings out before he lost his nerve to do so. “When I was in the fire—”
Emilia flinched at the mere mention of it, but Kasper only tightened his hold on her hand and caressed the inside of her wrist with his thumb. “When I was in the fire, I had somewhat of a revelation. I realized my efforts to protect you were a means to an end. If you don’t have a life of your own, then it won’t matter how much I love you. You’ve sacrificed more for me—”
Her eyes went wide. “You’ve sacrificed for me too, Kasper! I’m not oblivious to that.”
Kasper shook his head as if he hadn’t heard her at all. “I’ll never be the person you deserve. I doubt I’ll ever be outgoing with strangers or good at social events, but I’m willing to try—with or without improved looks.”
“You don’t need to do that, Kasper. I love and accept you just the way you are.”
“Yes,” he said, smiling. “But someday you might want more, and I can’t risk that.”
“What are you saying then?”
“I’d want to kill anyone who ever made you unhappy. I need to apply that same standard to myself.”
Her pretty brow wrinkled with worry.
“Don’t worry,” he said, smiling. “The only thing I’m saying is that I know I need to be more open-minded. Maybe I’m still adjusting to being in a relationship, but I want you to know that I’m willing to try.”
“D-Does this mean you’ll rethink the whole child thing?”
“Yes,” he said, slowly. “Truth be told, I already have—”
Kasper was interrupted by flailing arms wrapping themselves around his neck and a squeal of happiness in his ear. Even though it pained him to do so, Kasper laughed freely, snaking his arm around Emilia’s waist to pull her closer.
“If you’re willing to be open-minded, then I’ll do my best to try too,” she whispered in his ear. “If you still want to get the rest of these surgeries—”
“No,” Kasper said firmly. “Death and I have brushed shoulders too many times already. As much as I might want to have a normal appearance, I need to accept it’s not in the cards for me.”
“You have more lives than a cat, Kasper. If I deserve to have everything I want, then so should you.”
“You,” he said as he reached up to trace her face, “are all I’ve ever really wanted.”
Tears threatened to fill her eyes as Emilia brought his hand to her mouth and kissed the top of his knuckles. Encouraged by the morphine and his own distaste for Emilia’s tears—even happy ones—Kasper smiled, tugging her to lay beside him. Emilia was especially careful not to hurt him as she laid on her side and tucked her head into the crook of his arm. Just having her close again was enough to make his pain vanish completely, and just like the fire, Kasper reached a new epiphany. He and Emilia would never be a perfect match. Between all of their differences they probably shouldn’t have been together in the first place, and no matter how much they loved each other, there would always be disagreements. Yet as long as they were both willing, they could adapt together—assuring their desires could be achieved while they grew as individuals.
He knew that no matter what came their way, they would face it.
Together.
About the Author
A native of New Jersey and lifelong nerd, Amanda Lance recently completed her Master in Liberal Arts at Thomas Edison State College after her BA in English Literature and AFA in creative writing. As an avid reader of all genres, some of her favorite authors include Hem
ingway, Marquis de Sade, Stevenson, Bukowski and Radcliffe.
When she isn’t writing or reading, Amanda can found indulging in film noir or hiking with her other half and their extremely spoiled dog. She is obsessively working on her next book and trying to tame her caffeine addiction.”
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Adapting Desires (Endangered Heart Series Book 3) Page 16
