by Linda Ford
“I don’t think the sun is even up yet. Polly, look and see if it is.”
She scooted out to check and he pulled on his boots and rolled up his bedroll.
“Nope. But there’s pink in the east.”
“Yup,” Luke drawled. “Wasting the best part of the day.”
Obviously no one was going to extend him any leeway because he’d lost his best friend. He didn’t expect it either. Warren stowed his bedding in Sam’s wagon. Guess it was his now.
He went with the men to catch the mules and to help the teamsters with the oxen.
Sam’s drivers sought him out. Arnie seemed to be the spokesman. “Are you our boss now?”
“I intend to see Sam’s wagons safely to market. I’m hoping you’ll all be happy to work with me to see that happen.”
Arnie nodded. “Sam was a good man. We’ll do our best to see that his wagons get safely to Santa Fe.”
“I expect we won’t get any further than Bent’s Fort this winter. I hope I can sell his goods there.”
The man nodded. “We hoped that was the plan. Don’t care to try and cross the mountains in the dead of winter. Thanks, Boss.” The men departed, leaving Warren rather pleased with how things had turned out with the teamsters.
His gaze went to the mound of dirt and rocks. He’d give everything he owned to have Sam back with him, but there wasn’t time to dwell on the matter. And there was no going back or undoing what was done. One could only live life forward. Sam, dear friend, I’ll miss you more than words can tell, but I’ll take care of your business and your niece. You’d chuckle to hear how she’s busy trying to get me to marry so she can have a real family.
His smile quivered and he blinked his eyes rather hard as he continued about his chores.
Back at camp, Polly watched for him to return. Mary Mae handed him coffee and filled their plates. Polly sat beside him then called, “Mary Mae, would you sit by me?”
Mary Mae’s eyes filled with sympathy.
Warren didn’t know if Polly wanted Mary Mae’s company for her own sake or was she still pressing for him to consider marriage. He suspected the latter and wanted to scold her for her doggedness about the subject. Before Mary Mae reached them he murmured to Polly, “You’re barking up the wrong tree, little missee.”
She turned wide, blue-green eyes toward him. All innocence. But he wasn’t convinced. “I’m sure I don’t know what you mean.”
“I’m equally sure you do.”
Mary Mae stopped in front of them. “Why do you two keep whispering?”
“Commiserating,” Polly said with such conviction that Warren almost choked.
Thankfully, she did not pursue their conversation once Mary Mae sat beside her.
Reverend Shepton rose and took off his hat. He normally asked the blessing on the food. He cleared his throat as if he had an announcement and all eyes turned toward him.
“We’ve suffered a great loss. None of us more than our little Polly here. But despite our sorrow, we can be thankful for so many things like dry weather, water and feed for the animals, and our own food. But I feel specially burdened to ask God for traveling mercies. Let us pray.”
The reverend had prayed each morning for safety on their journey, but perhaps he felt he should give it more attention today.
Reverend Shepton bowed his head and took a moment as if to collect his thoughts. His prayer was simple, but heartfelt, and Warren’s throat tightened.
He could believe God would listen to a man like the reverend.
They ate quickly as if everyone was anxious to leave this place, and they were soon on the trail.
He drove Sam’s wagon with Mary Mae and Polly on the seat beside him.
Gil had sent forward a bewhiskered man of indeterminate age—Abel—to drive Judith’s wagon. A trustworthy, patient man.
The warm sun dried mud into lumps that fell from the wheels of the wagons. The clear sky promised no more rain. Ahead of them stretched the endless trail.
He sank into himself, numbed by the monotony of driving the mules and the missing of Sam.
Polly was squeezed in between him and Mary Mae.
A sob from her jerked him from his dazed state. “Are you crying?”
“Leave me alone.” She climbed over the seat and into the back.
“Stop,” Mary Mae said. “I’ll go to her.”
He pulled on the reins. “But she said to leave her alone.”
“It was a cry for help.” Mary Mae joined Polly in the back of the wagon. “You can go on now.”
He did as she requested. How was he supposed to take care of a little girl if she said the opposite of what she meant?
5
Mary Mae held Polly in her arms and made soothing sounds. Poor child. How alone and frightened she must be.
“Polly, we will take care of you.” She wanted to promise she would be there for Polly in the future, but she couldn’t. Warren was now the child’s guardian and he would make choices regarding her future.
Polly sniffed hard and sat up. “I’m not going to cry. I’m not a baby.”
Mary Mae rubbed her back. “It’s okay to be sad and to cry.”
Polly lifted her chin. “I’ve lost everything.”
Pain slashed through Mary Mae at the desperation in Polly’s voice. “You still have Warren.”
Polly rocked her head back and forth. “Uncle Sam promised me a real home. And Warren is too stubborn to get married so I can have it.” The child wiped her eyes dry, opened them wide and appealing. “I’ve been praying for a real home in time for Christmas. Do you think God can give me that?”
Mary Mae glanced to the front. Had Warren heard this conversation? Chances are he would have as Polly’s voice carried well. If he did, shouldn’t he be the one to answer Polly’s question? But although she gave him plenty of time to speak up, he remained silent.
That left her to deal with the waiting girl.
“Honey, God can do anything, but that doesn’t mean He’s going to do something just because we ask. It might not fit in with His plans.”
Polly scowled. “You’re telling me God wants me to be homeless? He doesn’t want me to have a home by Christmas?” She scooted away, crossed her arms and scowled at Mary Mae.
“I can’t answer for what God thinks.” Goodness, the child forced her to dig deep into her own faith that had admittedly faltered a time or two. Usually when things went wrong. Something about that admission troubled her. Was she really so shallow that she would only trust God if everything went according to her plan and suited her whims? “But when life doesn’t go the way we want, we can choose to find something else to look forward to.”
“Like what?”
“Well, let’s see.” How much did one tell a child? Only sometimes Polly didn’t seem like much of a child. “I had plans for a nice home by Christmas, too, but that didn’t work out and now I am going to Santa Fe to help a friend.”
“Oh.” Polly stared at her a moment, then hopped out the back without giving Warren a chance to stop.
He let Mary Mae return to the seat and they sat in silence for a time.
She chuckled, bringing his attention to her. “I thought she would be a lot more sad and subdued, but instead, she is almost angry. And set on getting that home Sam promised her.”
“I heard.”
The rattle and bang of the wagon filled the silence.
“I’m sorry your plans didn’t work out. Was there a man involved in your disappointment?”
She almost laughed at the way he put it. “He was the whole reason for my disappointment.”
“The way you talk I’m going to guess he didn’t die.”
“No, and I can be grateful for that. I guess I shouldn’t be so upset by what happened. In light of your loss, it doesn’t seem quite so important.” Except it was almost as bad as a death and left her mourning and angry at the same time.
“Whatever he did, it hurt you.”
She thought of Randolph’s actions. “Yes, it
did. We meant to marry. I spent hours planning how I would decorate the little house his brother would rent to us. I had such dreams. Not unlike Polly I suppose. A home of my own. Somehow I thought that he felt the same way and we would nestle down into our home and live—”
She couldn’t bring herself to say the words.
Warren said them for her. “Happily ever after?”
“Yeah, that.”
“What happened to—what’s his name again?”
“Randolph. He decided he wanted more than a home with me. He wanted to see if he could find gold.” She drawled out the word just as Randolph had. As if making the word long gave it more value. “He said goodbye and left. I don’t suppose he once thought how I felt. Never gave his promise to me a second thought. Simply walked away without a backward look.” She shrugged one shoulder as if she could dismiss the hurt and disappointment she’d experienced. “I suppose I should be used to it. My Pa did the same thing over and over. He’d come and go without any regard for how it felt to be left behind. And then he wouldn’t accompany us to Santa Fe. After so many trips back and forth, why all of a sudden, didn’t he want to come?”
Warren nodded. “It made you feel like you didn’t matter.”
“Exactly.”
He slanted a cautious smile her way. “I’m awfully glad you’re here to help with Polly.”
She chuckled, her despair dispelled by his welcoming words. “Thank you. It’s nice to be appreciated.”
He stared at the mules ears. “I don’t know what I’m going to do with the child.”
“Seems to me there’s a gal in Pecos who is free and quite likely waiting for a proposal.”
“Liza.” He roared with laughter. “Polly has made it clear Liza doesn’t have her approval.”
They looked at each other and then jerked away. They both knew what Polly had in mind. Unfortunately, it didn’t fit in with Mary Mae’s plans. Nor Warren’s. “I’m going to Santa Fe to help my friend. She recently lost her husband and has a baby son. Her in-laws are threatening to take him. I’m going to persuade my grandfather to intervene on her behalf.”
“You could write a letter to him.”
“I did, but I think he’ll more likely agree if I can speak to him face to face.”
“For your friend’s sake, I hope you succeed.”
She acknowledged something she hadn’t admitted until now. “I might be too late, but I have to try. And if the grandparents have taken her son, I will help her get him back. Sophia was such a good friend to me when we lived there and we’ve kept in touch as best we could.”
“Polly is getting up with Donna Grace and Luke,” Warren pointed out.
“She enjoys the baby.” But Polly soon left off playing with Elena and leaned over to speak to Donna Grace. After a moment, Donna Grace looked surprised then glanced toward Mary Mae and Warren and laughed.
“Uh-oh,” Mary Mae said.
Warren leaned by her to look the same direction. “What is it?’
“I don’t know, but I fear Polly is up to something.”
He groaned. “I suppose we’ll find out soon enough what she’s scheming. But surely not more about the two of us getting married. I’ve explained it so many times.”
“Me, too, but she keeps bringing it up. In a way, I suppose it’s to be understood. After all, as she said, she’s lost everything.” She waited for him to indicate what his future with Polly would entail. “I know you likely haven’t had time to think about it, but are you planning to give her the home she wants?”
He jerked about and stared at her. “Me? I’m not planning to get married again. I failed too badly the first time to even consider it.”
“You’re certainly not the first man who put his own interests first. Nor likely will you be the last.”
“I guess you know how it feels to be on the receiving end. Women and children deserve better than that.”
It wasn’t exactly what she meant, but she wasn’t about to argue the matter because she wholeheartedly agreed.
They stopped a short time later for the noon meal.
Again, Polly insisted that Warren and Mary Mae sit beside her. The cold meal finished, Warren stretched out under the wagon for a rest, as did the other men while the women visited a bit.
Mary Mae could not contain her curiosity and once Polly move off to play out of earshot, turned to Donna Grace. “Seems you and Polly were having a deep conversation. I thought she might have been asking about me or something.”
Donna Grace chuckled. “She’s got marriage on her mind. Not hers, of course. She wanted to know what made Luke and I marry. I said it started out being a convenient arrangement for us. I didn’t tell her it was because Elena was on the way and Buck wouldn’t let us travel without a male escort.” Her adoring gaze went to Luke snoring softly under the wagon.
“That was all?” Mary Mae prodded.
“She asked if we loved each other and I said we did, but that it had to grow. Then she wanted to know how one grows love.” She chuckled. “It was a sweet question and made me stop and think. I told her it was sharing time and responsibility together, talking, taking care of each other and wanting the best for the other person. She seemed satisfied with that answer.”
Mary Mae wanted to believe it had somehow settled Polly’s matchmaking desires, but her experience with the child warned her to expect Polly to hang on to her plans.
Polly sat between Mary Mae and Warren as they resumed the journey. They hadn’t gone far when she began to jiggle and push her elbows out. “It’s too crowded. Let me sit on the other side of you.”
Suspecting the child of ulterior motives, Mary Mae traded places with her.
“Thank you, that’s better.” Polly swung her feet and hummed tunelessly.
Mary Mae and Warren crowded together.
Warren raised his eyebrows, silently asking what Polly was up to. Mary Mae shrugged. The answer seemed pretty obvious.
Polly shifted to face them. “Whatcha want to talk about?”
Mary Mae studied the child. Did she have an ulterior motive for her question? If so, she would, no doubt, soon reveal it.
Polly continued, addressing Mary Mae. “It must be fun to have a sister. I’ve always wanted one. Or a brother.” She shifted her attention to Warren. “A brother would be nice. A brother and a sister the nicest of all.” She sighed dramatically. “Instead, I am a lonely child with no home.”
Warren nudged Mary Mae. “Here we go again.” He raised his voice to speak to Polly. “Sometimes siblings can be a nuisance. Right, Mary Mae?”
“Indeed.”
Polly bounced forward. “Tell me what it was like.”
Warren looked at Mary Mae then back to Polly. “We’ve been on the trail together for a year. Why this sudden interest in my family?”
Polly’s bottom lip trembled. “I want to know what it’s like to have a family. You have a mama and papa and a brother and sister. I don’t.”
“I guess that makes sense.”
A pleased smile flickered over Polly’s face and then she leaned forward, intent on what Warren would say.
“My mama and papa live on a very nice farm in Missouri. That’s where the three of us grew up.”
“You did fun things?”
“We did. Also went to school and did chores. My favorite chore was tending the animals. Of course, it was Luke’s favorite, too, so when he got a little bigger we would wrestle for who got to do it.”
“You were bigger than him?”
Warren smiled as if pleased by a memory. Mary Mae would have liked to ask what it was that he recalled, but he continued to talk. “He is four years younger, so he was smaller until he was about twelve.”
“Is Judith younger or older?”
“She’s four years younger than Luke.”
“How old are you?” Polly asked.
Mary Mae laughed. “Are you sure you haven’t asked Judith all these questions?”
Polly widened her eyes which only
served to convince Mary Mae she had. “I just want to know for sure.”
“I’m twenty eight.”
Mary Mae knew to expect the next question. Polly faced her, her eyes bright. “How old are you, Mary Mae?”
“I’m almost nineteen.”
Polly counted on her fingers.
Guessing where this line of questioning was going, Mary Mae groaned.
Polly brightened. “So Warren is nine years older than you? Perfect!”
Mary Mae stared straight ahead, her cheeks on fire. She dare not ask Polly what the age difference was perfect for. Besides, she suspected it.
But Warren tromped right into the trap the girl had set. “Perfect for what?”
“For getting married. The man should be older and wiser and everything.” Polly flapped her hands as if it made perfect sense.
Warren banged the heel of his hand to his forehead. “Polly Braddock, you listen to me. I don’t aim to get married. Nor does Mary Mae as we’ve both told you. So stop this silly nonsense.”
Polly sat back, her bottom lip trembled and Mary Mae thought this time it was real. The girl turned aside, but not before Mary Mae saw tears begin. Despite Polly’s persistence, Mary Mae’s heart went out to her. She caught the girl around the shoulders and pulled her close.
“Honey, you simply have to accept that it isn’t going to work out the way you want.”
Warren reached over Mary Mae’s back and squeezed Polly’s shoulder. “I’m sorry, little gal. But we’ll manage alright without me getting a wife.”
Polly quieted in Mary Mae’s arms, but didn’t make any attempt to sit up. After a few minutes, Mary Mae nudged Warren and mouthed, “Has she fallen asleep?”
He leaned forward to peer into Polly’s face then shook his head.
It really didn’t surprise Mary Mae that the child wanted to be held. It was less than twenty-four hours since she’d lost her uncle and with his death, her dream of a home by Christmas. Her feelings must be raw.
Mary Mae did the only thing she could think to do. She began to talk about her childhood. It would appear she talked to Warren, but really, she meant her words for Polly.
She told about growing up in Santa Fe with a grandfather who wanted the girls raised to be proper Spanish ladies, while their parents wanted them to become women ready to face the challenges of a new country and a new way of doing things. “He and Donna Grace were always at odds. I tried harder to please him.”
