The Prince and the Pauper

by Mark Twain

  CHAPTER XXIV. The Escape.

  The short winter day was nearly ended. ?The streets were deserted, savefor a few random stragglers, and these hurried straight along, with theintent look of people who were only anxious to accomplish their errandsas quickly as possible, and then snugly house themselves from the risingwind and the gathering twilight. They looked neither to the right nor tothe left; they paid no attention to our party, they did not even seemto see them. Edward the Sixth wondered if the spectacle of a king on hisway to jail had ever encountered such marvellous indifference before.By-and-by the constable arrived at a deserted market-square, andproceeded to cross it. ?When he had reached the middle of it, Hendonlaid his hand upon his arm, and said in a low voice--

  "Bide a moment, good sir, there is none in hearing, and I would say aword to thee."

  "My duty forbids it, sir; prithee hinder me not, the night comes on."

  "Stay, nevertheless, for the matter concerns thee nearly. ?Turn thy backa moment and seem not to see: ?_let this poor lad escape_."

  "This to me, sir! ?I arrest thee in--"

  "Nay, be not too hasty. ?See thou be careful and commit no foolisherror,"--then he shut his voice down to a whisper, and said in the man'sear--"the pig thou hast purchased for eightpence may cost thee thy neck,man!"

  The poor constable, taken by surprise, was speechless, at first, thenfound his tongue and fell to blustering and threatening; but Hendonwas tranquil, and waited with patience till his breath was spent; thensaid--

  "I have a liking to thee, friend, and would not willingly see theecome to harm. ?Observe, I heard it all--every word. ?I will prove it tothee." Then he repeated the conversation which the officer and the womanhad had together in the hall, word for word, and ended with--

  "There--have I set it forth correctly? ?Should not I be able to set itforth correctly before the judge, if occasion required?"

  The man was dumb with fear and distress, for a moment; then he rallied,and said with forced lightness--

  "'Tis making a mighty matter, indeed, out of a jest; I but plagued thewoman for mine amusement."

  "Kept you the woman's pig for amusement?"

  The man answered sharply--

  "Nought else, good sir--I tell thee 'twas but a jest."

  "I do begin to believe thee," said Hendon, with a perplexing mixture ofmockery and half-conviction in his tone; "but tarry thou here amoment whilst I run and ask his worship--for nathless, he being a manexperienced in law, in jests, in--"

  He was moving away, still talking; the constable hesitated, fidgeted,spat out an oath or two, then cried out--

  "Hold, hold, good sir--prithee wait a little--the judge! ?Why, man, hehath no more sympathy with a jest than hath a dead corpse!--come, and wewill speak further. ?Ods body! ?I seem to be in evil case--and all foran innocent and thoughtless pleasantry. I am a man of family; and mywife and little ones--List to reason, good your worship: what wouldstthou of me?"

  "Only that thou be blind and dumb and paralytic whilst one may count ahundred thousand--counting slowly," said Hendon, with the expression ofa man who asks but a reasonable favour, and that a very little one.

  "It is my destruction!" said the constable despairingly. ?"Ah, bereasonable, good sir; only look at this matter, on all its sides, andsee how mere a jest it is--how manifestly and how plainly it is so. ?Andeven if one granted it were not a jest, it is a fault so small thate'en the grimmest penalty it could call forth would be but a rebuke andwarning from the judge's lips."

  Hendon replied with a solemnity which chilled the air about him--

  "This jest of thine hath a name, in law,--wot you what it is?"

  "I knew it not! ?Peradventure I have been unwise. ?I never dreamed ithad a name--ah, sweet heaven, I thought it was original."

  "Yes, it hath a name. ?In the law this crime is called Non compos mentislex talionis sic transit gloria mundi."

  "Ah, my God!"

  "And the penalty is death!"

  "God be merciful to me a sinner!"

  "By advantage taken of one in fault, in dire peril, and at thy mercy,thou hast seized goods worth above thirteenpence ha'penny, paying buta trifle for the same; and this, in the eye of the law, is constructivebarratry, misprision of treason, malfeasance in office, ad hominemexpurgatis in statu quo--and the penalty is death by the halter, withoutransom, commutation, or benefit of clergy."

  "Bear me up, bear me up, sweet sir, my legs do fail me! ?Be thoumerciful--spare me this doom, and I will turn my back and see noughtthat shall happen."

  "Good! now thou'rt wise and reasonable. ?And thou'lt restore the pig?"

  "I will, I will indeed--nor ever touch another, though heaven send itand an archangel fetch it. ?Go--I am blind for thy sake--I see nothing.?I will say thou didst break in and wrest the prisoner from my hands byforce. ?It is but a crazy, ancient door--I will batter it down myselfbetwixt midnight and the morning."

  "Do it, good soul, no harm will come of it; the judge hath a lovingcharity for this poor lad, and will shed no tears and break no jailer'sbones for his escape."