Pippa sat down too. “Go on.”
Jo sighed. “The night before Shaun arrived, I got home pissed from our night out…and…I thought we were going to kiss. I really did and so I just…”
“What?”
“I blurted out all about Shaun.”
“Oh my God. You waited all this time to find the right time to tell him and then told him when he was moving in for the kiss?”
“Yes.”
“And there I was thinking it was the nannying you needed help with.” Pippa sighed.
Jo leaned forward. “It seemed like the right thing to do. I’ve never two-timed Shaun, and I actually cared about not hurting Josh.”
“So?”
“He just…” She shook her head. “It was so weird. Even as pissed as I was, I could feel the atmosphere completely change. It was like the kitchen suddenly had frost. He turned into a different person.”
Pippa’s eyes were wide. “Blimey.”
“He went completely cold and I kept saying sorry and he kept saying it was fine.”
“Bleagh.”
“He spent the whole weekend being absolutely horrible to Shaun—and me—and hinting that I was easy—”
“Bastard!”
“—which did not help things with me and Shaun. Then I tried to apologize to him again.” Jo shut her eyes.
Pippa whispered. “What did he say?”
Jo knew it by heart. She spoke in a monotone. “He said, If it’s on tap, I’m going to go for it, what bloke wouldn’t, and you were certainly on tap that night, but anything more than that and you’re living in a chicklit fantasy world, you’ve seen too many Hollywood films, sorry to disappoint you.”
Pippa’s eyes were saucers.
Jo stood up suddenly. “And since then he’s been a complete bastard,” she continued. “Anyway, he’s so immature. He’s twenty-five and not paying a penny in rent even though he earns stacks as an accountant. And he goes on about his dad leaving his mum, which was absolutely years ago. My first impression was right—when he spoke to me on speakerphone, with his entire office listening to him take the piss—that was the real Josh Fitzgerald.”
Pippa whistled long and low.
There was silence for a while, as Jo started to do her makeup.
Pippa was the first to speak. “It’s just so easy to forget when he looks like that.”
“Well, it’s hard for me to forget because he’s a bastard to me.”
“He doesn’t pay any rent?” asked Pippa.
Jo shook her head. “Nope. Vanessa told me.”
“Bloody hell,” whistled Pippa. “Life is so unfair, but now we don’t have to feel guilty using him to make the boys jealous tonight.”
“I don’t want Gerry to be jealous of him,” moaned Jo. “I don’t want Gerry being jealous of anyone. I don’t want Gerry, period. I’ve got Shaun.”
“Alright, sorry. We’ll just work at Nick being jealous of him then.”
“I don’t want him coming with us tonight,” whined Jo, slumping onto her back. “He makes me a nervous wreck.”
“Does he?” asked Pippa. “Why?”
“Because he watches me like a hawk all the time.”
“Who said he’ll be watching you?” quipped Pippa, before sauntering into the bathroom.
While Pippa showered, Jo phoned Shaun. He was out, so she left a message on his voice mail and tried Sheila. She was also out, so she left a message on Sheila’s voice mail. Then she phoned her parents. They were also out, but didn’t have voice mail. By the time Pippa wandered out of the bathroom, wearing a small towel and a big smile, Jo had given up wondering where on earth everyone could be.
Pippa had had such a hot shower that steam billowed behind her into Jo’s room. Loath to open her window on to the building site next door, Jo asked Pippa to open her bedroom door into the kitchen a crack. Pippa did so, but instead of leaving it, she stood, transfixed. Watching her, Jo became transfixed, too. And then Pippa frantically beckoned her over to behind the door.
At first Jo shook her head, but when she thought Pippa’s eyes might actually fall out of her head, she rushed to the door and tried to see into the kitchen. Pippa was in the way, so Jo nudged her over a bit and the two of them strained to listen. All the children had vanished, as had Vanessa. Through the crack in the door, they could see Josh and Dick whispering urgently to each other in the kitchen.
“Is that why you’re back so early?” they heard Josh hissing.
“Of course it is,” hissed back Dick. “Do you think I’d be here otherwise? She just didn’t turn up.”
“Why not?”
“How the hell do I know? I phoned, but there was no answer.”
“You don’t think Vanessa might get a little bit suspicious about you coming back so early on a Saturday afternoon? She thinks you’re being rushed off your feet in a busy shop every week.”
They heard Dick let out a short, sharp laugh.
“Jesus, Dad,” came Josh’s voice. “You can’t keep this double life up for much longer.”
“You think I don’t realize that?” Dick raised his voice.
“Shhh! She’ll hear you!” There was silence. Then, “Dad, you’ve got to do something.”
“I could always leave,” came Dick’s voice.
“Oh, like last time? Dad, why didn’t you listen to me? I told you not to fall for her—”
“Give me a break, Josh. Now’s not the time.”
They moved out of sight toward the conservatory and started talking louder, confident they were alone.
“Maybe I’m just not cut out for marriage,” the girls heard Dick say.
“Dad,” said Josh firmly, “just tell Vanessa. Before it’s too late.”
“Are you mad?” there was real terror in Dick’s voice. “And risk losing everything?”
“She’ll understand, Dad. She’s not that bad. She’s not…she’s not like Mum.”
“You’ve got a lot to learn about women,” observed Dick, to the accompanying sound of whiskey being poured into a glass.
Silently, Jo pushed the door to. She’d heard enough. She and Pippa stared at each other, jaws dropping, brains buzzing. They then tiptoed into the en suite bathroom and shut the door behind them.
“Oh my God!” whispered Pippa. “Dick’s having an affair!”
Jo put her hands to her head. “Poor Vanessa! She suspected this! And she’s working so hard at the moment.” She gasped. “And Josh—the man who hates infidelity—is helping his father have an affair! The hypocritical bastard!”
“Maybe he’s one of those men who hates infidelity in women only,” pointed out Pippa. “But thinks it’s all part of being a red-blooded man.”
Jo frowned. “But it was his dad’s affair that finished Dick and Jane’s marriage.”
Pippa nodded. “Exactly! And he told you trust was everything! He blames the woman and not his dad! Absolutely typical!”
“But why is Josh telling Dick to tell Vanessa about his lover?” pondered Jo.
Pippa’s eyes narrowed. Then she gasped. “Because he wants to ruin his father’s second marriage. Of course! He doesn’t want to see Daddy happy with another family, does he?”
“Oh my God,” muttered Jo, shaking her head. “He told me, the night he moved in, that if his Dad was going to leave his family it might as well have been for a nice one. I knew it didn’t ring true! When you think about it, it’s really sick coming to live with the family that your dad chose over yours. D’you know, Shaun saw the real Josh—because Josh wasn’t putting on the charm for him—and Shaun thought he was up to something. He thought Josh was spying for his mum—but it’s even worse than that, he’s actually trying to break up his dad’s second marriage.” She sat down on the closed toilet lid, landing with a thump. “God,” she breathed, “and I almost fell for him.”
“I wonder if Josh’s mother has somehow found out about Dick’s affair and smuggled Josh in to make sure Dick doesn’t get away with it this time,” wondered
Pippa. “Maybe they’re in it together!”
Jo put her head in her hands.
Pippa stood against the sink and crossed her arms. “What was Josh’s story for having to move in here?”
Jo looked up. “His flatmates went traveling. And he couldn’t find anyone else to move in at such short notice.”
They looked at each other.
“Where was his flat?” asked Pippa.
“Crouch End.”
Pippa raised her eyebrows. “He was living in Crouch End—an area with its own recording studio, its own private club, its own massage parlor, more cafés than Soho, and the famous Trumpton clock tower—and he couldn’t get flatmates?”
Jo’s head dropped. “I’ve been such a fool.”
“Blimey,” said Pippa. “This is knackering. I can see why Sherlock Holmes needed drugs.”
“At least I’m not confused anymore,” said Jo, thinking aloud. “Bloody hell. I was even considering breaking up with Shaun.”
“Well,” said Pippa. “He is Hornblower.
“On legs,” added Jo.
“Tell you what though,” said Pippa. “You don’t have to worry what he thinks of you now.”
“Why?”
“Because he’s a shit. And he’s too busy screwing up Vanessa’s life to really care about you.”
There was a knock on the door.
“Coming!” answered Pippa. Jo stood up from the toilet and, as a reflex action, flushed it. Pippa gave her a dumbfounded look, then started giggling. Then she opened the door to Josh.
“Bloody hell,” he said, when he saw both of them and heard the flushing toilet. “You really did shower together.”
Later that evening, the wine bar was humming. Pippa was wearing new jeans and was arm in arm with Josh. They made quite a pair, and heads turned to see them pass. Jo’s heart went out to Nick.
“I thought the brother was thirteen years old,” greeted Nick.
“Ooh,” said Pippa. “You’re not in CID for nothing, are you?”
“It’s alright,” said Josh, extricating himself from Pippa’s clasp. “For the purposes of the evening, I’m a spotty teenager. The real spotty teenager is already there.”
Nick frowned at Josh.
“Believe me,” insisted Josh, “I didn’t want to be part of this date any more than you lot wanted me here, but if it’s for my kid brother, I’ll do it. Just pretend I’m not here.”
Nick and Gerry gave him one smile between them.
“Sorry about the other night,” said Nick. “You know, trying to beat you up.”
“Trying? I don’t want to be there when you succeed.”
Gerry made a move to kiss Jo hello and she instinctively leaned backward, into Josh.
They sprang apart.
“Right!” she exclaimed. “Who’d like a drink?”
“I’ll come with you,” said Gerry. “Give you a hand.”
At the bar, Jo made a point of standing at a safe distance from Gerry and focusing on getting the bar staffs’ attention. When the drinks were ordered, she led the way back swiftly and surely. The others had found some seats—a sofa and a couple of chairs. She sat on a high-backed chair, leaving Gerry to sit on the other one, the sofa between them. Josh had nabbed the other chair and Nick and Pippa nestled with ample room on the sofa.
“So.” Gerry grinned over at Jo. “How was your day?”
“Fine thanks,” said Jo.
“Getting used to London?” he asked.
She thought about this for a moment. “Mm,” she allowed.
“That doesn’t sound too encouraging,” said Gerry.
“It’s still hard,” she said.
“Hard? Why?”
She shrugged and felt her throat close over. “I suppose I still miss everyone from home.”
“Ah right,” nodded Gerry. “The boyfriend.”
Jo stared at the floor, keeping very still and waiting for the salty sensation at the back of her throat to dissipate.
“Yes,” she said eventually, in a level tone. “It’s still a bit hard.”
“Can’t be that hard, surely,” coaxed Gerry. “Otherwise you wouldn’t have left him.”
Jo stared him straight in the eye, aware that hers were glistening. “No,” her voiced seemed to echo. “Some choices are just hard.”
She found it impossible not to glance at Josh as her eyes made the scenic route back down to her drink. She thought it must be the first time they’d made eye contact since before he’d dropped the charm offensive. And, oh boy, how the look had changed. It was no longer a warm connection that helped banish homesickness, it was a cold, observing mask. She knocked back some wine.
“Wouldn’t be able to understand it myself.” Gerry grinned at Nick. “If my girlfriend left town, I’d take it as a pretty bad sign.”
“Well,” smiled Pippa sweetly. “Maybe that’s why you haven’t got a girlfriend.”
“At the moment,” he pointed out quietly, eyes on Jo. In the silence that followed this he finished his pint. “Right! Who wants another?”
Jo shook her head without making eye contact. When Gerry and Nick left for the bar, she turned to Pippa, so angry she temporarily forgot Josh’s presence. “I thought I’d made it clear—” she started.
“You did,” Pippa told her firmly. “It’s not your fault he’s choosing not to take the hint.” She turned suddenly to Josh. “Is it?” she asked him.
“What?”
“You’re an impartial bloke, what’s the bloke’s view?”
“Um—”
“Jo can’t help it if Gerry chooses not to take her very pointed hints, can she? There’s not much more she can do than keep reminding him she’s got a boyfriend, is there? I mean, she can’t help it that he doesn’t live in London, can she?”
Jo tuned out of the conversation as much as possible, staring into her drink. She heard Josh take in a deep breath. “I should think after this evening, Gerry’ll get the message loud and clear.”
“Good,” said Pippa. “Our Jo doesn’t need guilt from all sides, does she? Come on, Jo, cheer up. It’s Saturday night.”
Jo managed a perfunctory smile, aware that Josh was still openly observing her.
Josh bought them all popcorn at the cinema, which pissed off Nick and Gerry, who felt this was part of their gentlemanly duty, and riled Jo, who felt it was easy to be generous when you were a city accountant with no rent.
In the cinema, Pippa led the way into the seats, followed sharpish by Nick. Jo followed him and, aware that Josh was nearer to her than Gerry, left them both to it. Gerry suddenly appeared beside her, walking along the row behind, and he nipped ahead of her and jumped over the seat so that he was now next to her and not on the end, next to Josh. She stopped dead in her tracks. Until she felt Josh approach behind her, when she forced herself forward.
Nick sat down, Pippa sat down, Gerry turned back to Jo and sat down. She sat down, crossing her legs away from him, her eyes fixed straight ahead, her body frozen. Gerry offered her some popcorn and she shook her head and turned away. To her surprise, Josh’s voice sounded in her ear. “You all right?”
She managed a nod.
“Only,” he continued, “you look like you’re about to be tortured rather than see a film. You didn’t read the reviews, did you?”
Jo let her shoulders relax. “I’m fine thanks.”
Immediately Josh swore loudly.
“What?” she asked.
“There’s Toby,” he said.
“Where?” Jo scanned the cinema.
“There,” he pointed with his head. “Right smack bang in the middle, by the front.”
They watched him in the dark.
“What the hell’s he doing in the front?” hissed Josh.
“Maybe he wants to see the film,” pointed out Jo.
“See if you can spot a thug who might be Todd Carter,” Josh cut into her thoughts.
“The only thug I can see is Toby,” she replied.
“Oh m
y God, he’s holding her hand,” whispered Josh. “Is he mad? Todd Carter’s gonna kill him.”
“He’s a fearless young man. You should be very proud.”
“He’s a horny idiot who’s going to get his face feng shuied. If she breaks his heart,” he said, “I’ll break her fucking scooter.”
“You don’t mean that.”
“No,” said Josh, bowing his head. “You’re right. They’re built to last.”
Jo stifled a snort. The famous Josh Fitzgerald charm, she repeated in her head. She hoped the film was good. She needed distracting.
The film was shit. Toby completely forgot about the presence of Todd Carter thanks to the close proximity of thirteen-year-old ledge Anastasia Smith, a vision of virginal purity wearing a T-shirt that pressed against her buds of breasts and a wicked nose ring. So carried away was Toby by the proximity of such guileless beauty that he swallowed his chewing gum, got three lengthy snogs and a quick grope, all without spilling his popcorn.
This was more than anyone got in the group behind them. During each of his kid brother’s excruciating snogs, Josh squirmed, sighed, and swore so much that people started to turn round and shush him. Every time the film showed a fight scene, Josh sensed that Todd Carter was taking notes for later and made noises about complaining to the censors for giving youngsters bad ideas. By the time they all came out of the cinema, he was a wreck.
“Far too much sex and violence,” he muttered. “No wonder the youth of today are such losers.”
“Right,” said Nick, hand placed round a grinning Pippa’s waist. “Which way did the lovebirds say they were going?”
“They were going to go up the back roads to the nightclub,” said Josh. “The long way, because they really want me to suffer.”
“Right, well let’s follow them,” said Gerry. He shot Jo a wink. “Now for the evening’s real entertainment.”
Jo only realized she’d grimaced to herself in the dark when she heard Josh chortle beside her.
They kept a safe distance. Josh would have liked the distance to be considerably less safe, but the CID boys said that if it was, Todd Carter wouldn’t pounce. Josh said did they really need him to pounce, couldn’t they wait until just before he pounced, and the CID boys insisted that no, Todd Carter had to actually pounce before they could do anything. Josh said could they at least use a different word because the word “pounce” was starting to make him feel sick.
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