“No, really. That’s not necessary. Kenzie isn’t even home. Mom took her with her to Montrose.”
“This isn’t about Kenzie, it’s about you.”
She eyed him suspiciously, recalling the caring boy she once knew. The one who put others before himself and always looked out for his friends. Unlike her sister’s, which was purely superficial, Matt’s heart was what made Lacie fall in love with him all those years ago.
“I’m not taking no for an answer, Lace.” Placing a hand on her shoulder, he turned her around and propelled her toward the exit. “Now let’s get you home.”
* * *
Matt was growing weary of Lacie’s stubbornness. Particularly when her face was so pale and it was obvious she needed help.
So despite her objections, he not only took her home and escorted her inside the house, but he was determined to stay until her mother and Kenzie got home. He wanted to see for himself that she was, indeed, going to be okay.
“This is so unnecessary. You don’t have to stay.” She argued from the couch. “A little herbal tea and I’ll be fine.”
Arms crossed over his chest, he stared down at her. “Well, you’re wrong. I do have to stay. However, if you’ll point me in the direction of the tea, I’ll be happy to fix it for you.”
She huffed out a breath and looked the other way. “Never mind.”
“Sorry, no can do.” Whisking past her, he made his way into the kitchen and put the kettle on to boil. “Now let’s see, if I were an herbal tea bag, where would I be?” He opened the cupboard next to the stove. Nope.
“You’re not funny,” she said.
“I wasn’t trying to be.” He moved on to the cupboard near the coffee maker. Score! “Man, who knew there were so many different kinds of tea?” He riffled through the plethora of boxes, locating two that said Herbal. “Which one do you want? Chamomile or ginger peach?”
“Surprise me.”
A few minutes later, he returned to the sofa and handed her a steaming mug. “I decided on the ginger since it’s supposed to be good for stomach problems.”
She looked at him suspiciously. “How do you know that?”
“I just do.” Curiosity had him wandering toward a grouping of photos on the white bookshelves against the far wall. “Oh, and be careful, it’s hot.” He studied a picture of Lacie and Marissa as little girls and another of them with their father when they were teenagers.
Lacie had always been more reserved than her sister. So he’d been pleasantly surprised the day she barreled up the drive of the ranch in her father’s Jeep. Even if it was for nothing more than to rub in the fact that she’d gotten her driver’s license before he did. Still, he liked that she’d wanted to share that momentous occasion with him.
That kind of stuff stopped after he and Marissa started dating. And though he’d never acknowledged it at the time, he missed Lacie and the camaraderie they’d once shared. She got him in a way no one else ever had.
On the next shelf, he spotted a photo of Marissa in a hospital bed, smiling and holding a newborn.
His heart twisted as he picked it up and touched a finger to Kenzie’s face. I wish I could have been there.
Clearing the emotion that suddenly clogged his throat, he returned the picture to the shelf and went to check on Lacie.
“How is it?” He picked up the purple throw draped across the back of the sofa and laid it over her stretched-out legs before sitting down on the ottoman opposite her.
“It’s fine.”
Resting his forearms on his thighs, he clasped his hands together. “There’s something I’d like to ask you. I’m just not quite sure how to do it.”
She stared into her cup. “Just say it and get it over with.” Her words held an air of defensiveness.
“I’ve heard the stories of how Marissa died, that she was in a car with some guy when it crashed, but...where was Kenzie?”
Finally, she looked at him, her expression softening as it so often did whenever her niece was the topic of conversation. “She was spending the night with me. Something I have thanked God for many, many times.”
The corners of his mouth twitched. “Did that happen often? Kenzie staying with you.” He wasn’t trying to interrogate her, he simply wanted to know about Kenzie’s life.
“Sometimes more often than others.” She set her cup on the side table. “I never minded, though. I’ve loved her as though she were my own from the moment she was born.” She adjusted her blanket. “I had the privilege of being Marissa’s birthing coach.”
“So Kenzie has known you all her life?” Something he wished he could say.
“Yeah.” She met his gaze with an intensity that hadn’t been there before. “There’s not much I wouldn’t do for that little girl.”
“I know.” He stretched his legs out in front of him, crossing them at the ankles. “She’s blessed to have you, Lacie. Not everyone would be willing to take on the role that you have.”
She lifted a shoulder. “I don’t know. I think I’m the one who’s blessed. There’s not a day that goes by that I don’t thank God for her.”
“Me, either.” The words seemed to fall out so naturally. Probably because they were true. “At least not since I found out about her.”
Silence fell between them for so long he was afraid he’d offended her. Then again, in her eyes, he was the guy who posed a threat to something she held very dear.
“About that DNA test.” She must have read his mind.
And while he knew in his heart that Kenzie was his, he understood Lacie’s need for proof.
“I ordered a test kit.”
He lifted a brow. “Ordered?”
“Thought that would be the most discreet way to handle this. I’ll need a cheek swab from both you and Kenzie to send to the lab. We should have the results by the end of the week.”
“Is it reliable?”
“One hundred percent accurate, according to the website.”
Restless, he pushed to his feet and started to pace. “I want you to know that I’m not a love-’em-and-leave-’em kind of guy.” He probably shouldn’t have said that, but for some strange reason, it mattered what Lacie thought of him.
She lifted a shoulder. “We all make mistakes.”
“I tried to stay in touch with Marissa, but she never answered my calls.” He again dropped onto the ottoman. “When she finally did, she told me that she and her boyfriend were back together, so I shouldn’t call anymore.” Head in his hands, he stared at the carpet. “I didn’t even know she had a boyfriend.”
“That must have hurt.”
“It did. Made me feel—”
“Like you’d been used.”
For a moment he thought she was chastising him. But lifting his head, he saw only understanding in her eyes. “Something like that, yeah.”
Sitting straighter, she reached for her tea. “Marissa rarely thought about anyone but Marissa.” She took a sip, then cradled the cup in her hands. “I’m not saying she was a bad mother. She loved Kenzie and doted on her. But...there were times when I worried about my niece’s safety.”
His whole body tensed. His hands fisted. “Did she hurt her?”
“No, Marissa would never do that. But with so many men moving in and out of her life, I...had some concerns.”
He knew exactly what she was talking about. “I would, too.” An unexpected anger filled his words. “Sorry, that wasn’t directed at you. Just the situation.”
“I understand. There were times I was pretty upset myself.” She set her feet to the floor. “Kenzie should have been Marissa’s top priority, not Marissa.”
Looking at Lacie now, he couldn’t help wondering how two sisters could be so different. One self-serving, the other self-sacrificing. And while most people thought
Marissa the prettier of the two Collier girls, he was beginning to see that Lacie’s beauty far outshined her sister’s. Hers wasn’t superficial. Instead, it emanated from inside her, touching those around her.
Including him.
Chapter Eight
Lacie really needed Matt to leave.
This conversation was getting way too intense. Not only had he managed to get her to open up, sharing things she’d never shared with anyone else, she’d also seen the pain that flickered in his dark eyes when he talked about Marissa and the way she’d just cast him aside. Something Lacie had witnessed firsthand on more than one occasion. Why was it always the good guys her sister hurt?
Yes, despite being sucked in by her sister, Matt was one of the good guys. To Lacie’s chagrin. Because for as much as she wanted to dislike him, she couldn’t bring herself to do so. Not when he was still the same caring guy she’d once lost her heart to.
However, she did not need or want a man in her life. Especially one who held the power to take away the one thing she cherished most in this world.
So she practically jumped for joy when she heard the garage door open. “Sounds like Mom and Kenzie are back.”
Thank You, Lord.
Matt stood as the door leading from the kitchen to the garage burst open a few moments later.
“Matt!” Kenzie cheered when she spotted him. She charged across the room, her light-up shoes flickering, and stopped right in front of him.
“Hey, there, small fry,” he said, looking down at her.
She giggled. “Want to play puzzles with me now?”
His smile reached from ear to ear. “I live to play puzzles with you.”
The kid giggled again. Did he have her wrapped around his finger or what? Or maybe it was the other way around.
Unfortunately for Lacie, though, it meant he wouldn’t be leaving right away.
She tossed the throw off her legs and stood as her mother entered, carrying several plastic bags and a massive pizza from the supercenter deli.
“Let me help you, Mom.” Grateful for the distraction, she hurried into the kitchen and took hold of the bags.
“Thank you, dear.” Her mother set the unbaked pizza on the counter. “Matt, I didn’t know you were here. I’m glad I decided to get the larger pizza.”
He strode toward them. “Lacie wasn’t feeling well after rehearsal, so I wanted to make sure she was okay.”
Mom’s gaze shifted to Lacie. “Are you all right, dear?”
Not that she was ever really sick. At least, not in the way Matt thought.
“Yes, I’m feeling much better now thanks to Matt and some ginger tea.”
“Good,” said Mom, turning on the oven. “Ginger is always helpful for an upset stomach.”
Matt nudged Lacie with his elbow. “See.”
“Come on, Matt.” Kenzie tugged on his other hand. “Let’s play.”
Mom looked at the two of them. “It would appear that you’re in high demand around here, Matt.”
“I wouldn’t have it any other way.” He winked at Lacie before heading around the island to join Kenzie at the table.
Unexpected heat crept into her cheeks.
Perhaps she should consider leaving.
She didn’t, though, and even after Matt had gone home and she helped Kenzie into bed later, thoughts of her time alone with him continued to play through her mind like a sappy movie. The way he’d insisted on taking care of her, even when all she’d really been was heartsick, had her feeling a bit guilty. No one had paid her that much attention in a long time. And while she didn’t want to like it, she did.
With Marissa’s old Strawberry Shortcake lamp glowing on the night stand, Lacie sat on the edge of the bed as Kenzie pulled her princess comforter up to her neck.
“We seed Santa Clause at the store.”
“You did?” Lacie brushed an unruly strand of dark hair away from the child’s face.
“Grandma wouldn’t let me say hi to him, though.”
“Well, maybe we can say hi to him later.”
Kenzie pouted then, her brow puckering as she crossed her arms over her chest. “She wouldn’t let me look at the Christmas trees, either.”
Lacie’s heart squeezed. How she wanted this Christmas to be extra special for Kenzie. Unless her mother had a change of heart, though... “Grandma was probably in a hurry to get home.”
“But we need a Christmas tree so it can be Christmas.”
Lacie swallowed the lump that lodged in her throat. “Kenzie, Christmas is in our hearts. Not in a tree or the decorations. Sometimes we forget that Christmas is Jesus’s birthday.”
“He was a little, bitty baby.” Kenzie sounded like a baby as she held her hands close together.
“That’s right.”
“But then He growed up to be big.” She thrust her arms wide. “Like Matt.”
Lacie couldn’t help chuckling. “He did.”
Kenzie again snuggled under her covers and yawned. “I like Matt.”
Lacie thought about all she’d discovered about him today. “Want to know a secret?”
Kenzie nodded, her eyes wide.
“I like him, too.” Making it even more imperative that she keep her distance. Although, considering they had rehearsals the rest of the week, that was going to be a challenge.
Smiling, Kenzie held her arms up for a hug.
“Good night, sweetie.” Lacie hugged her tight. “I love you.”
“Night, night.”
Out in the hallway, Lacie closed the door and drew in a deep breath.
Oh, God, I know Christmas isn’t about trees, decorations or gifts, but I so want Kenzie to be able to experience all of the joy this special season has to offer. Please, soften Mom’s heart and allow her to see things through her granddaughter’s eyes.
With Kenzie’s words still ringing in her ears, she continued down the hallway and into the living room.
Mom sat in her chair near the window, reading as usual. She glanced at Lacie as she entered. “Everything okay?”
“Yeah.” Pausing behind the sofa, she dug her fingers into the plush throw. “Can I get you some more tea or anything?”
“No. I just poured a fresh cup, so I’m fine.”
While her mother went back to reading, Lacie rounded the end of the couch, mustering all of the courage she could find, and sat down. “Mom, I’d like you to reconsider having a Christmas tree for Kenzie. She’s just a little girl. Next year, you can go back to—”
“We already had this discussion, Lacie.” The woman never even looked up. “I have deliberately chosen not to celebrate Christmas.”
Lacie willed herself to remain calm, though everything inside her was screaming. “No, you’ve deliberately chosen to be mad at God for taking Daddy. Do you really think you’re going to get back at Him by refusing to celebrate His Son’s birthday?”
Without even flinching, her mother finally met her gaze. “I really don’t care what God thinks.” Then she went back to reading her book. Or at least pretending to.
Lacie’s ire did spark now. She shot to her feet, hands fisted at her sides. “I’m sorry you feel that way, Mom. However, I am going to do everything in my power to make this the most special, most amazing Christmas that Kenzie has ever seen.”
Mom lowered her book and took off her readers. “There will be no Christmas tree in this house.” Her voice was firm, yet even. “No decorations, no celebrations.”
Lacie thought of her father, her bottom lip trembling. He was the godliest man she’d ever known. One who reveled in the holidays, sharing the good news of Jesus with everyone he came in contact with. “Daddy would be so disappointed in you.”
Turning on her heel, she walked to her room and dropped onto the b
ed, a flurry of emotions darting through her. God, what am I going to do?
* * *
Matt stood in front of the Collier house Friday evening, filled with gratitude. Not only were rehearsals finally over, Lacie had received the results of the DNA test today, proving beyond a shadow of a doubt that he was, indeed, Kenzie’s father. A sense of pride wove through him. He had a daughter. Now if he could just survive this weekend’s performances.
Unfortunately, all of the rehearsals this week hadn’t allowed him much time with Kenzie. Just a few minutes here and there. So tonight he was looking forward to taking her and Lacie to the town’s Christmas tree lighting. The annual event was one of his favorites of WinterFest. Carols, hot cocoa and, of course, the lighting of the tree. He couldn’t think of a better way to start the holiday season.
With a spring in his step, he headed up the walk. But before he even made it to the porch, the door flew open and Kenzie bolted toward him in her coat, snow pants and winter boots.
“Matt!” She threw her arms around his legs and squeezed with all her might.
The gesture nearly knocked him over, both physically and emotionally. The way she’d so readily accepted him. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d felt so much love or had someone so genuinely happy to see him. He could definitely get used to this.
He lifted her into his arms. “That was some greeting.”
“I misseded you.” She patted his cheeks, the look in her eyes as sincere as it was innocent.
“I missed you, too, small fry.”
She giggled then, a sound he would never tire of hearing, and hugged him around the neck.
“Where’s your aunt Lacie?” His breath hung in the chilly night air.
“Right here.”
He and Kenzie both turned to see her coming toward them, wearing a light gray puffer jacket over a pair of jeans, a white scarf and a white knit cap.
“You look great.” Then again, she always looked good.
“Thank you.” Pink tinged her cheeks. “Just trying to keep warm. Which reminds me—” she pulled a small pair of gloves from her pocket “—we need to put your mittens on, Kenzie.”
The child held out her hands, allowing Lacie to assist her.
The Deputy's Holiday Family Page 8
