by Beverly Rae
“You’ve got it bad, don’t you?”
“Bad?” She frowned, thrown off-kilter. “What do you mean?”
Bob arched one eyebrow in unmistakable body language. “Girl, anyone can see you love the big galoot. A blind man could see it. Even a stupid man. Hell, even a blind stupid man.”
Did she love Dirk? Alex inhaled sharply, thrown by the lump in her throat and the thrill the idea gave her. Her breathing quickened with the memories flooding through her. Dirk’s sexy grin. Dirk shielding her from the hunter’s gun. Dirk taking care of her, comforting her. Dirk understanding how she felt, exactly what she needed. He’d shared a similar experience and had given her a friend when she’d needed that more than a lover.
And then she remembered his greatest gift. Dirk sacrificing himself to save her from her brother’s attack. How could she have not known it? She did love him. She loved him with every ounce of her being. But what could she do about it when she couldn’t even get near him?
She scowled at the ceiling again, listening to the footsteps above her, the sounds of the werewolves tending to one of their own. Dirk was a werewolf. She clenched her fists, wanting to hit something, someone. What was she thinking getting involved with a werewolf? Sure, sex was one thing. But to consider spending a lifetime with a werewolf? They didn’t have a chance. Her people would never stand for it any more than his people would. Talk about Romeo and Juliet werecreature-style. Would their love have the same ending?
She froze, uncertainty taking hold, warning her to slow down. She didn’t know if he cared for her other than as a friend. Wasn’t that what he’d said? That they were friends? Friends with benefits, maybe. She huffed out her exasperation. But he had to care about her, right? After all, he’d saved her, jumped in between her and her brother. Would he have done that if he didn’t love her?
She heard a thump above her, jolting her back into the here and now. “What the hell are they doing anyway?”
Bob followed her glance upward and shook his head. “I’m not sure. Although I’ve heard that when a werewolf is attacked by a werecat, they have to take action to counteract the werecat’s bite. Something about the two blood types not mixing.”
Their bloodlines wouldn’t mix, meaning werecats and werewolves didn’t belong together. No matter how much they cared for each other. She stared, trying to see through the ceiling with willpower alone. “What kind of action?”
“Again, I’m only telling you what I’ve heard, not what I know. But I think they have to bite him. You know, use their saliva to counteract the bite of the werecat.”
She gaped at him and tried to understand what he meant. “You mean, those three werewolves are going to bite Dirk? When he’s already so badly wounded?”
“Yeah, but that’s the way of it. Although I think only one of them has to bite him.”
“And then he’ll get better?” She hated to think of Dirk getting bitten, but if a bite from a werewolf could save him, then it would be worth it. Still, a nagging worry wouldn’t let go. “But wait. What if it’s the female that bites him? Doesn’t that mean they’ll be mates?” Could she stand having Dirk mated to another if that saved his life? To save him, she could. But what if there was another way? “Does the female have to bite him? Or can one of the males do it?”
“Hell, I didn’t think of the mating thing. I don’t know, but I think it’s usually the females that bite the wounded.”
That bitch was going to bite her Dirk? Alex growled, confusion, jealousy and anger giving her courage. “Oh, no she won’t. I have to make sure someone else does it.” Alex whirled around and bolted for the stairs. Ignoring Bob’s shout to stop, she took the steps two at a time, dove to the left and headed down the hallway. She flung her body at Dirk’s bedroom door, bursting it wide open. The door slammed against the wall, surprising the three shifters. Alex paused to regain her balance, then dashed toward Dirk.
“What the hell are you doing?” Cannon caught her, slipping his arm around her waist and lifting her off her feet. Bronson whipped around from the window, snarling. Sheila, in wolf form, knelt over Dirk, her jaws open and fangs dripping.
“Keep your jaws off him!” Alex struggled in Cannon’s arm but couldn’t get free. “Put me down, you big mutt.”
Cannon readjusted, lifting her higher like she was nothing more than a child in his arms. “What is your problem, little kitty?”
“She can’t bite him. Don’t let her touch him.” Gnashing her teeth, Alex kicked out, hoping to strike a vulnerable body part. She pointed at the surprised Bronson. “You bite him. Not her!”
Sheila, a bemused look on her face, ran her tongue over her teeth. She whined, then lowered her head until her sharp fangs were less than an inch from Dirk’s shoulder.
“Can we get on with this, Cannon, or do we have to wait for you and the kitty to play tag first?” Bronson plopped into a nearby armchair, boredom etched on his features.
“Cannon, damn you. Put me on my feet.”
“I don’t think so. Let’s let Sheila finish her business first.” He waved a hand at the werewolf, signaling for her to get to work. “Go on, girl.”
Sheila nodded once, then opened her mouth wide.
“No!” Wrenching free at last, Alex fell to the floor, landing on her hands and knees. She scrambled away from Cannon, keeping low until she reached the end of the bed. Jumping on the comforter, Alex screamed and hurled her body at Sheila. She struck the werewolf on the side, knocking hard against the werewolf’s lean body, but she was too late. Sheila’s teeth sank into Dirk’s shoulder.
“No.” Her anguished whisper was harsh, filled with loss. Her strength left her, taking away none of the horror. Lying on her side next to Sheila, Alex took a steadying breath and faced the awful reality. Sheila was Dirk’s mate now.
And still Sheila held on. Dirk’s body jerked beneath Alex, thrashing, unconsciously trying to free himself from Sheila’s hold. Alex, too exhausted to move, didn’t resist Cannon as he lifted her off the bed and sat her in the other chair. She kept her eyes on Dirk, his body growing calm again until at last Sheila released him. Wiping her bloodied mouth against the bed linens, the female werewolf shifted back to full human form, losing her fangs. “Umm, umm, good. Dirk is one tasty puppy.”
“Damn you.” Alex wanted to say more but couldn’t find the energy. She’d lost him. Before she’d ever had him, she’d already lost him.
“Man, I knew werecats were weird, but this one is super freaky.”
She’d had enough. All the anguish, all the horror of the past days caught up with her, sending her into a rage. She flung her body at the shifter and wound up once again squirming in Cannon’s arms.
Cannon carried her to the door. “Shut up, Bronson. Something else is going on.” In the hallway, he slammed the door and studied her. Moving his face nearer to Alex’s, he examined her like a bug under a microscope. “Is this what I think it is, little kitty? Do you like Dirk?” He grinned, reminding her of Dirk’s wicked smile. “I mean, do you likey-likey our little Dirky?”
Alex blinked, words of denial on her lips that wouldn’t come out. “Will he live?” If she couldn’t have Dirk, then at least she’d know he was safe. Even if that meant he was mated to that she-hound. “Will her bite heal him?”
“It will.”
“Are you sure?”
His chuckle irritated her. “I’m sure. But I’m also sure that there’s something going on between you two. More than fun sex, that is.”
She blinked again and tried to hide her reaction. “I owe Dirk my life. That’s all.”
“Oh, little kitty, don’t try to fool a fooler like me. You’re lying. But lie away. I don’t care. Still, I’ve never known a werecat and werewolf to fall in love.”
She shook her head, afraid to admit to him that she loved Dirk. Could her love cause trouble for him?
His tone hard, he added, “It can’t work, you know. It won’t work.” Taking hold of her, he guided her down the hall. “For your ow
n sake, little kitty, leave and don’t come back.”
Alex refused to leave. The werewolves could keep her out of Dirk’s room, but they couldn’t run her off. Not until she was sure he would recover. Instead, she sat by the edge of the bubbling stream behind the main house and watched the window of Dirk’s room. She held her head high and her back straight, determined to face the dismal future the best way she could.
Losing Conner and Bryer had torn a hole in her, a hole that might never be filled. But the fact that she’d lost Dirk, too, had destroyed her. He was mated to the she-werewolf now and she could do nothing about it. A boulder lodged in her chest, making it difficult to breathe, but she had no more tears to shed. What was done was done. Yet until she could see that Dirk was all right, she’d stay.
How had this happened? How had her brother, her friend and the man she loved been taken away from her? Didn’t she deserve love? She swallowed, closing her eyes to steel herself against the sorrow. Once Dirk was healed, she’d take Conner’s and Bryer’s bodies back to her people, then go out on her own. How could she stay with the pride when everything reminded her of hopes now dead? The agonizing questions pounded her, leaving her shaking and cold despite the warm sun.
If only things had gone differently. If only she’d told Dirk what he meant to her before Bryer’s attack. Sitting on a rock by the stream, she’d rehearsed what she wanted to tell him, but she no longer had the right. Maybe if she said the words out loud, she’d get them out of her system, freeing her to move on.
“Dirk, we need to talk.” She shook her head, hating the cliché phrase. Gathering her thoughts, she tried again. “Dirk, I need to tell you something.” She could almost see his mischievous grin and feigned a halfhearted giggle. “Dirk, for once, stay quiet and listen, okay?”
“But I haven’t said anything yet.”
“Oh, shit.” She spun toward Dirk and placed her hand on her chest. “Damn it. Are you trying to scare me to death?”
Dirk, pale and unsteady on his feet, chuckled, then winced at the pain. “I think I’m the one closest to death.”
She couldn’t help returning his grin. “You can say that again.” Hurrying to him, she led him to a nearby rock. She wanted to slip her arms around him but settled for taking his hands. “Hey, it’s good to have you back.”
“It’s good to be back.” Dirk glanced around the area. “We made it to Bob’s place. Although I don’t remember too much after getting my ass kicked by your—”
He slammed his mouth shut and gave her an apologetic look. “I’m sorry about Conner, Alex. And Bryer, too. Look, if there had been any other way… If you’d had any other choice… He would’ve killed you, too, you know.”
She pressed a palm to his cheek. “I know. It’s all right. Or at least it will be. Besides, you’re not the one who…”
“I can’t begin to imagine how hard that must’ve been for you.”
She choked back a sob and her throat closed up. Would she ever get over having to kill her brother? Even if she’d done it to save Dirk? “Are the others gone?”
“You mean Cannon and the rest?” Dirk glanced toward the house. “Yeah. They weren’t too happy about my asking them to leave, but I couldn’t stand another minute in that room. I had to find you. I had to make sure you were all right. Especially after what happened.”
The silence that filled the space between them wasn’t strained. Instead, she remained quiet, letting his nearness soothe her, taking comfort by laying her head on his shoulder. Nothing else mattered except him.
“Alex, you said you needed to tell me something. What is it?”
Her tranquility shattered and she took a deep breath, hopefully bringing in courage along with the air. She sat up and wiped away a tear. “Yes. I did.” She wanted to go on, but her mouth wasn’t listening to her head.
“And?”
Suddenly, she could no longer meet his gaze. Instead she turned to the creek and fervently wished she’d kept her mouth closed. What made her think he cared for her? Just because she loved him didn’t mean he had to love her back. In fact, she wouldn’t have blamed him if he didn’t. A werecat falling for a werewolf. Talk about delusional.
“I repeat. And?” He bent lower so he could see her face. “If you know nothing else about me, Alex, you know you can trust me. Tell me what’s on your mind.”
She did trust him, trusted him with her life. But could she trust him with her love? She searched his face and wanted to reach out to touch the stubble on his cheek. “I wanted to tell you that…” Again, her tongue stopped working even as her brain shouted at her to get it over with.
“Yeah, we’ve established that you wanted to tell me something.” He chuckled, then winced again. “I don’t suppose you were going to tell me the doc left more pain pills. I sure could use a couple right now.”
“I don’t know, but I’ll check with Bob.” Saved by the pills. “So you’re feeling better? And Sheila’s bite helped?” The female werewolf’s face came to her, but she shoved the image away.
“Alex, you’re driving me crazy. Speak your mind so I can say what I need to say.”
Did he want to tell her that he’d taken a mate? Anger coursed through her, fueled by the cruel blows life had given her. She steeled her resolve and prepared for the pain he might cause her. All she had to do was tell him that she loved him and then she could leave, hopefully without her tail between her legs. “Fine. I’m going to say what I have to say. But don’t think you have to say anything back. In fact, it might be a good thing if you don’t.”
“O-kay. If that’s what you want.”
She shot him a glare. He quickly pantomimed zipping his lips. “Good. So I’m just going to blurt this out. Dirk Claxton, I love you.” With the words spoken, she stood and paced away from him. She stopped with her back to him, unable to maintain eye contact yet unable to leave.
“Alex.”
“No. Don’t say anything. I know what I said is ridiculous. I mean, we haven’t known each other very long. And the idea of a werecat and werewolf becoming romantically involved is ludicrous. Sex is one thing, but love? Pff. What a joke.”
“Alex.”
“All I wanted was to let you know. That’s all. I don’t expect you to have the same feelings for me that I have for you. So now that I’ve said what I wanted to say, I’ll get out of your hair. I’m happy you’re doing better, Dirk. Have a great life.” She was halfway to the main house when he called for her, his tone gruff and commanding.
“Come back here, Alex. Don’t make me chase after you.”
She ground her teeth, fought back a retort and got ready to face him. Holding her head high, she slowly turned toward him and thrust out her chin. “What do you want?” What more could he want from her when she’d already given him her heart? His face, however, was unreadable.
“Would you come back here, please? I haven’t had my say yet.”
She groaned to release a lot of pent-up anxiety, stuck her chin higher and trudged over to him. “Do you need something other than pills? Do you want me to get Bob?”
He took her hand and she smothered back a gasp. She’d had her life turned upside down, but would he say something to make it worse?
“You’re a fool, Alex Grayson.”
Chapter Eight
Alex may have spilled her guts to a man who didn’t love her back, but that didn’t mean she’d let him put her down. “Okay, I gotta admit it. That wasn’t what I was expecting. But gee, thanks for your opinion.” She jerked her hand away. “I’m sure you’ll understand if I don’t stick around to listen to you call me names. Let’s pretend this little confession of mine never happened.”
“Will you stop flapping your yap for a second? I think you’re a fool because anyone who would want me has to be a fool.”
What? Alex studied him, unsure what he meant. A glimmer of hope flickered in her heart. “I don’t understand.”
“It’s a good thing you’re beautiful, Alex, because at the moment y
ou’re acting pretty dumb.”
“Hey, watch it.” The fact that he’d called her beautiful kept the anger from rising. Instead, she tried to move away, but he grabbed her, pulling her close. He took both her wrists and held her in place.
“I’m kidding. Sheesh, how can you love a man and not know he’s a kidder? All I can say is that it’s a good thing I love you, too. Otherwise, you’d be in a shitload of embarrassment right now.”
“Let go— Wait. What did you say?” She took a couple of deep breaths, trying to slow down her pounding heart. “Did you say you love me, too?” Although his eyes sparkled with humor, the sincerity she saw made her hold her breath. Could it be true? Did he really love her? She narrowed her eyes. “Are you serious? Or is this one of your jokes?”
“Let me give you an answer you’ll understand better than words.” Placing his palms on her cheeks, he brought her lips to his. The kiss, soft and yet possessive, lingered, mixing his breath with hers. Alex leaned against him and the kiss deepened, his tongue skimming the inside of her mouth. She sucked, drawing in the special flavor that was all Dirk. He groaned and held her tighter, one hand locked onto the small of her back, the other cupping her buttocks. She clasped the back of his neck, rejoicing in the love they shared. She believed the love in his kiss and sighed.
“Dirk, take me. Make me yours.”
He panted, his breathing labored and made a face. “Damn, I can’t. But God knows I want to.”
She brushed her tongue lightly across his lips. “Then do what you want to do.” Running her hands gently along his shoulders, she reveled in her man’s physique. “Don’t you want to show me how much you love me? To prove it to me?
