by Tara Brown
I shake my head. "No."
I don’t wait for him to act nuts. It makes us both nuts and I'm tired of that song and dance. I wrap my arms around his neck and kiss his throat. He remains wooden.
I bite him softly, smiling against his skin. "Just say the thing you think."
He shakes his head.
I climb him like a huge tree, wrapping my legs around his waist. I close my eyes and whisper into his ear, "I don’t know how to say it, Will. I don’t have that thing that I need to tell you how I feel, but I know how I don’t feel. I know the things I can't live without. Don’t make me shoot you."
He scoffs. I can feel him softening. His hands creep along my legs, cupping my butt. He holds me to him, pressing his face into mine. "I don’t have a purpose, Em. It's making me nuts."
I pull back. "You have a purpose. You make these people trust this place and me. You are the figurehead. You're the brains; you don’t need to be the brawn anymore."
He laughs. "Nothing like taking the man out of me."
I laugh too. "You know what I mean."
He shakes his head. "Next time can you just shoot me? I think it might be less painful than listening to this speech."
I shake my head. "No." I kiss his cheek. "Now I'm gonna go do a perimeter check with Mitch, my friend, and then I'm going to torture my new brother."
He flinches. "What?"
I nod. "He's mine and Star's age and from the city. His eyes are clear like ours, and I swear I can see Michael in his face. I asked him if he was a Gen baby and he said yes."
Will places me down. "Great. This is just getting better and better."
I kiss his cheek. "It's like you said. They are going to try to take what's ours ‘cause we have it better than them."
He kisses my lips softly. "Em, they aren't taking anything."
I reach behind me and open the door. "Please, Will. Please rest. Don’t exert yourself. Your breathing has been sounding bad."
He nods. "Okay. Stay with Leo."
I wink at him like Jake always does. "Done."
I leave the house again, worrying about everything.
Mitch gives me a shitty grin. "Was that so hard?"
Chapter Thirteen
The bark feels rough against my hands but the cool wind feels amazing. I can see Leo doing laps in the woods and Mitch in the tree to the right of me. Nothing else is moving though. We've run a perimeter and now I'm camped in my tree. Leo makes his way back to the meeting tree and sits at the bottom. He clearly hasn’t gotten a scent or seen anything; he looks peaceful like we're playing.
I look down at Leo. "Guess we're going with torture."
He pants and smiles. He doesn’t care either way.
I feel myself harden as I get back down on the ground. The forest sings around us. I leave the woods and stalk across the field, loving the feel of his fur in my fingertips as we walk. Mitch leaves the forest when he sees me walking in the tilled field.
The first thing I see is the lid of the bunker open when I round the corner. My guns are out instantly. Leo crouches low as we crunch our way to the farmhouse. Jake and a few guys are chatting in the horse pen and a girl with really blonde hair is feeding the goats. Men are hammering metal and no one seems to notice the bunker lid. He's snuck into the house maybe.
I open the porch door. Nan isn’t there. No one is. I slip down the hall, peeking in the doorways. No one makes any noises. I open Anna's door, but even Leo doesn’t want to look in there. The thing in the doorway is disturbing. I raise my gun at him, wincing in horror.
Anna frowns and wheeze yells at me. I can't understand her, but the doctor waves his free hand at me. "Her cervix is still closed. The cramps and bleeding are probably just spotting. You were right about the bed rest though."
His other hand moves between her legs. I gag a little bit, shaking my head. Anna snarls at me.
The doctor guy nods at the door. "Close the door. She says if Will sees, she's going to be pissed."
I stumble back. Leo has abandoned me. I close the door, still holding my guns out.
"Emma, would you stop. Jeeze, you act like such a boy sometimes."
I look down the hallway at Nan and shake my head. "What was that?"
She laughs. "Well, I figured why lock the doctor up when we can just get him to check out Anna real quick before you kill him. So I got Jake to let him out." I snarl but she points a thick wooden spoon at me. "Now you better not give me that look, young lady. I'll slap you around. I am not taking that shit off of you."
I point, hearing the way my voice cracks. "Nan, he's a monster. He's like me but worse. He's on Michael's team. He's probably killing Anna."
She rolls her eyes. "Through the vagina? Yeah, that's an efficient way to kill."
I gag as she says it and storm out of the house.
Will is crossing the field. My lip lifts when I see him talking to Mitch. I walk the other way. I know what is going to happen if I stay or confront him. I'm in the mood to shoot someone.
Leo rejoins me when we reach the forest's edge. I wave at the guy on the platform. "Take a break."
He nods and climbs down. I climb up and Leo finds himself a nice spot to make one of his nests. I see Jake crossing the field to where I am. When the tree sways, I clench my jaw. He climbs onto the platform, grinning away.
"Will send you?"
He nods. "You know it. He's a chicken shit when it comes to you angry."
I mutter, "I need to shoot him again, I think." I give him a look, still listening to the sound of the forest. "You know that guy is a bad man."
He shakes his head. "No, he isn't. He's a scout who won't make it back. He's been training to become a breeder doctor; Anna is a breeder, whether we like it or not. She is having that baby, against my wishes. It's better to have someone here who knows what they're doing."
I scoff and look down at Leo. He is still curled in a ball.
Jake tosses a balled-up leaf at me. "You need to stop being so paranoid. Maybe everything is going to work out. Maybe this is a safe place for us to be."
My stare darkens. "I don’t believe that place exists. I'm trying to, but I can't, and he is a reminder that we are in danger at all times."
"Emma, you are so bad at being around other people sometimes. You gotta mellow out."
I scowl. I don’t know what that means.
He laughs. "My dad used to say that all the time to my mom—mellow out. It means calm down and be chilled out."
I get up to climb down and leave him up there, but Leo isn’t curled in a ball. He's staring at something in the forest, and I don’t hear the forest song.
He chuckles. "I mean really…" I reach over and clamp his mouth shut, pulling him down to the platform on his belly. I lie beside him, keeping my eyes peeled to the forest. A crunch off to the left sends my eyes in that direction. I see Leo turn that way too.
I see the slightest flash of something between two trees. It comes out after another tree. It's a horse. The rider is slumped over the head of the horse. I jump up and start climbing down. Leo is already running in the direction. I shout up at Jake, "Sound the alarm!"
He looks panicked for a second but gets up, and I hear the gong of the log against the sheet of metal we dragged up into the platform.
I jump into the duff on the forest floor and sprint into the trees.
I see her matted hair, soaked in blood and start to feel sick. "STAR!"
She lifts her bloody face, weakly and smiles. "Em."
I grab the reigns of the horse and see the second one behind her. It's empty. The rider has fallen off. I jump onto the back of the horse with no rider and pull Star's horse.
We ride across the dusty grass into the driveway that has become our courtyard. People rush towards me. Will pulls Star down. I don’t look at him or her. I enter the house. Nan sees my face and moves. She knows better. I kick the back room door open. Anna is laughing and talking in her whisper. I grab the doctor guy and drag him down the hall. He shouts and
screams, and Anna makes her wheezy noises. I point at Nan. "Keep her in bed. No matter what."
Nan nods once.
I drag the shouting man out into the yard. I point at my bloody sister. "WHAT THE HELL IS THAT?"
He sees her face, swallowing hard. I see the recognition in his eyes. He knows her face and what happened. He looks at me, trying to hide it. "I don’t know."
I punch hard. He knocks back. The gathering crowd shouts. I feel someone grab at my arm, but it's too late. My rage is there; they get shoved back hard and my gun is out. I fire a shot into his thigh. "WHAT IS THAT?"
He screams, "I DON’T KNOW! I KNOW THEY WERE GOING FOR THE SOLAR PANELS! I DIDN’T KNOW WHEN! I WAS TOLD TO CHECK YOU GUYS OUT AND GO THERE!"
I fire at his other leg, barely grazing it. "YOU COULD HAVE WARNED US!"
He screams again, "PLEASE, I DIDN’T KNOW WHEN! I SWEAR! I HEARD YOU WERE THE ONE WHO SAVED US ALL IN THE CITY AND I VOLUNTEERED TO COME HERE AS A SCOUT! I WANTED TO FIND YOU!"
I lift the gun into his face. Leo growls in front of me, snarling savagely.
Tears stream down his cheeks. "Please. I didn’t have any part in that."
I feel something wrap around me. I assume it's Will about to rip my arms off, but it's Anna. She wraps herself around me whispering, "He's not bad. I know him. I met him at the farms. He snuck me to a different area, to make sure they put a baby in my belly. His name is Nick. Doctor Nick. Remember me telling you about Doctor Nick. He was the nice one. This is him. I was trying to tell you when you were dragging him away."
My hand starts to shake. I lower it, seeing the stricken face on him. I nod at Star. "Fix yourself and her."
He nods. "Thank you."
I almost hit him with the gun, but I don’t. I turn, seeing the way everyone is looking at me.
Mitch is holding Will back. I holster my gun and look at Star. "Did they overrun everything?"
She nods, looking like she might pass out any second.
"Do you think they'll stay there?"
She nods. "Michael wanted the mansion; he knew what Bernie had there. He doesn’t care about us."
My eyes narrow. She sees the look. "Soon as I'm better." I stalk off, back to the platform. I can't look at Will and Anna. I know they're disappointed in me. I am too, but it's not for the same reason. I wish I'd killed Michael when I had the chance. I should have known that letting him live would mean that he would find a way to still live the good life, and it would still be on the backs of the weak. I climb the tree and slump onto the platform. Jake giggles. It makes me smile.
"Did you shoot that nice doctor?"
I sigh and look down at Leo snuggling into a ball again. "Shit."
Jake nods. "That’s about it."
The sun sets and someone brings food. Jake climbs down and gets it. He passes me the fresh bread and stew when he gets back up. I moan, "The food is getting better, I swear it."
He nods. "It is. At least Nan stopped trying to make goat butter. That was nasty."
I laugh. "We need a cow or two."
I see a dark figure limping across the field and wince. "Shit."
Jake looks and laughs. "This is going to be fun."
I hear Leo growl and the doctor struggle to get in the tree with the injured legs. He winces and moans, but makes it to the platform, dragging his body across it.
Jake reaches over and pulls him to sit with us.
"Hey."
The doctor tries to catch his breath. "Hi."
He presses his back against the wood of the platform railing. "So, I want to go to the mansion and tell Michael that this camp is a bust. It's a little shit show of people barely surviving."
I laugh. "No."
"They'll come here to look for themselves if I don’t."
I shake my heads. "I don’t trust you. Anna may be fooled by Doctor Nick, but I am not."
He sighs. "You will be bringing the small army Michael has down on these people. I can stop it."
I lean into him. "You are going to tell him exactly how to get here and exactly how to overrun us."
He looks at Jake. "Is she always like this?"
Jake grins. "Worse usually. This is her keeping her temper in check."
His eyebrows raise. His dark-blonde hair and dark-blue eyes remind me of family.
"How did you know you were a Gen baby?" I ask, ignoring their conversation.
He smiles. "I knew always. My mom died; Michael raised me at the lab and explained how much better I was than everyone else. When the world ended, Michael took us to a place to stay safe while the city was being finished. Things happened faster than he thought they would. He wasn’t as involved in the end of the world as he liked to think he was."
"Why did he let the seed Gen babies overrun the city and terrorize people?"
He frowns. "I think he sees them as superior. He doesn't see the flaws in the system. He thinks the weaker humans should bow down to them."
"How are you so calm?"
He sighs. "I'm not. I'm just not trained for combat, the way you are."
I chuckle. "I'm not trained for combat. My dad died when I was ten. This is me surviving."
Jake points. "It's similar to combat training though. I guarantee if there were marines left, she would be one of them."
The doctor puts his hand out. "I'm Nick."
Jake takes his hand. "Jake."
I roll my eyes. "He came here to help Michael terrorize us, and you're shaking hands?"
Nick gives me a look. "I don’t know how else to make you believe. I came here to seek you out. I was at the breeder farm where you were for a few weeks. I left about four days before you took it down. I would have helped you, if I had known that was what you were going to do."
I listen to the silence of the forest and shake my head. "I don’t want your help."
"I can birth that baby for Anna, and I can stop Michael from coming here."
I narrow my gaze. "How? Go there and tell him everything is shit here and we're toothless mountain people? Then what, genius? You think he's going to miss the fact you're leaving again?"
He shrugs. "I'll go with the next scouting party and run away when we attack. They'll think I died. I'll be back before it's time to birth the baby."
Jake nods. "This is a good idea."
I shake my head. "No. He stays and keeps Anna safe. That’s the plan, or he dies. He doesn’t leave the yard."
Nick smiles. "You really are a hard ass. You remind me of Michael."
I growl. Jake slides along the boards between us. "Whoa, let's not start name calling."
Nick's eyes burn. "I didn’t mean it in a bad way. I meant it as a compliment. He had the potential to be someone amazing once. He let his God complex get to him. I don’t think you have that flaw."
I grin at him. "I have others."
He laughs bitterly. "I am betting I haven’t even seen half of them."
I stand up. "We haven’t even scratched the surface." I toss Jake the rifle."Don’t shoot yourself." I climb down, trying to hide the fact that I am a seething mess.
I want to go to my meeting tree but I don’t. I decide to face the music. I walk up to the door of the house as someone clears their throat.
I glance behind my shoulder at Mitch standing in a shadow. His right eye is swollen shut. He points from the dark doorway of the barn. "You gonna kiss this better?"
I snort and press my back against the door. "Is Star okay?"
He nods. "She's fine. She's like you, heals quick."
"Aren't we the lucky ones?"
He shakes his head. "I don’t think so. That irrational temper of yours isn’t worth the fast healing."
I swallow. "Is Will okay?"
He laughs. "No. That’s where I got this little gift. He's pissed. He sent Jake out to the tree; he knew he'd toss you over the edge."
I shrug. "I might win that fight."
He scoffs. "Not likely." He waves me off. "You better go face the music again." He slips back into the shado
ws, no doubt going to the loft to do his turn at the watch.
My stomach aches and burns, but I open the door, ignoring the look I get from the cook pit ladies. I give a simple nod and walk down the hall.
"We don’t blame you."
I look back at them. The Jake dog gives me a happy look.
"We don’t blame you. God knows what has become of our friends at the mansion. God knows what that monster is capable of."
I nod again. "Thanks."
I turn and walk down the hallway. I go face the really mean one first. She glares at me as I open the door. Leo jumps on her bed, trying to soften her for me.
She rubs his fur, glaring at me. I put my hands in the air. "I told him he can stay."
"After you shot him twice—how generous."
I sigh. "Anna, he's one of them. He's one of them, whether we see it or not."
She points at me. "You're one of them too!"
I close my eyes and pinch the bridge of my nose. "I'm worse. Night." I step out and close the door, leaving Leo in there to try to make her feel better.
I put my hand on the knob but the door flies open. Star stares at me from the doorway. I don’t know what to say or think, so I go for the obvious. "You alright?"
She looks back at Will who is sitting on the bed with no shirt on in a pair of shorts.
His eyes are wide, guilty. It makes me sick, but I have to assume it's nothing. The fire burning inside of me is trying to explode, but I fold my arms over my chest, holding myself together.
She nods. "I will be. I'm healing quickly. You okay?"
I nod. "How bad is the village?"
Her eyes water. "Sully, uhm…" She starts to cry. "Sully is gone. He fought a lot of them and most of our people got away—they ran. They knew the trail through the bomb woods so when they got chased, Michael's men got blown up. A lot of them are dead." A sickening grin crosses her lips. "It's probably only twenty men."
I laugh. "We can take twenty men."
She wipes her tears and shakes her head. "We gotta kill him. He's already planning shit. He's been taking the infected and releasing them on towns. Hordes of infected."
That was why he was caging them. I shake my head. "That doesn’t even make sense. He's just making more of them."
