Evie reaches over and takes her mom’s hand. She curls her fingers around her daughter’s hand with tears in her eyes. Olivia sits down next to me on the couch. She just sits, letting her nearness give me strength. Facing the returning memories of my family’s deaths, I need more. My fingers slip around hers and she squeezes my hand tightly.
“I could hear whoever had hurt my mom moving through the house. My dad started yelling. There was noise everywhere. I had no idea what was going on and I panicked. All I wanted was to get to my dad. I didn’t want to hurt my mom, but I had to push the cabinet door against her to get it open far enough so I could get out. She wouldn’t answer when I tried to talk to her. When I got out, I slipped in the blood and fell beside her. I think I might have just stayed there next to her if Dad and Cami hadn’t come running down the hall.”
My eyes close as images start flooding back in. I’m back on the floor, kneeling in my mother’s blood, crying, when my dad comes sprinting down the hallway with little Cami in his arms.
“I had never seen such a wild look in his eyes. Cami was bawling, terrified out of her mind. The knife flashed through the air so fast I only saw it once it stopped moving. My dad fell to his knees, dropping Cami to the floor.”
I can’t tell Robin about what happened next. Just thinking about it hurts my heart, squeezes it until it seems ready to split in two. The ache spreads through my body, pulling me inward as I try to fight off the memories and pain. I don’t want to remember my dad looking over at me, his lips mouthing the word “run” on his dying breath. I don’t want to remember the new puddle of blood forming and creeping toward me as I screamed.
More than anything, I beg myself not to remember the man snatching Cami up off the floor and adding her to the dead. I couldn’t stop myself from disobeying my dad and crawling over to her. I picked up her hand and held it. That’s when they realized I was in the room.
“I watched them die,” I whisper. “I tried to hold my little sister. They must have seen her arm move. One of them grabbed me. I thought I was next.”
“Oh, Mason,” Olivia whispers.
“I’m not even sure how I got away,” I continue. “One second they had me, and then suddenly I was free, running to find my older brother and sister.”
The room is silent as I struggle to find my will to continue. Olivia leans her head against my shoulder. Her hand rubs back and forth across my back slowly. Every stroke lends me some of her strength.
“They were already gone by the time I found them. I didn’t know what to do, so I hid under my brother’s bed when I heard the men coming again.” The images keep coming, but I push them away. “I don’t know how long I stayed under there. It felt like days as the men searched the house for me. Even after the noises stopped and I was sure they were gone, I stayed under the bed, too terrified to come out.”
“How did you end up on our front porch?” Olivia asks quietly.
I shake my head. “Someone must have called the police. A neighbor, maybe.”
How long did I lay curled up under Brian’s bed? I remember the knocking, the door swinging open slowly, the gasps as the officers saw the blood and bodies. I had no idea who they were. Already terrified, I didn’t even have a word to describe how I felt in that moment.
I think it was the walkie-talkies that finally started to calm me down. Even at the time I knew it was a strange thing to focus on, but Brian and I had played with our own set just the day before. Every time one of the officers spoke into his walkie-talkie, I felt another bit of terror drop away. It was a long time later that I forced myself to crawl out from under the bed.
My eyes were closed as I stepped carefully around Brian’s body, only opening once I got to the hall. All I saw were my dad’s shoes before snapping them closed again. The tears streaming down my face didn’t garner any more attention than my crying. Officers walked up and down the hall, but nobody saw me.
“None of the officers knew I was there, but I had no idea why. Out of desperation, I ran out of the house to the neighbor’s houses. I banged on doors. Most stayed closed, but even when someone answered the door no one helped me. They just stared into the empty space looking confused.”
“So you just kept going?” Robin asks.
“I kept thinking someone would finally see me. Maybe it was all just a nightmare.” I shake my head. “I just kept walking until something made me stop.”
“What made you stop?” Robin asks.
Finally, a good memory. “It was Olivia.”
I turn to face her and all the bad clawing at me slips away. “I saw her sitting in the living room window. She was breathing on the glass and drawing pictures in the fog. For a moment, I thought she saw me. It was the first glint of recognition in two days, but I wasn’t sure so I sat down on the porch. I was so tired and hungry.”
“I did see you,” Olivia whispers. “You looked so sad. All I wanted to do was make you feel better.”
My arms tighten around Olivia. I am so overwhelmed in this moment that I can’t even begin to find the words to tell her how much I love and appreciate her. One thought keeps repeating in my mind and it slips past my lips as a whisper. “I love you, Ollie.”
Chapter 14
On Our Own
(Olivia)
When I finally start to pull out of Mason’s arm, he pulls me back in tight against his chest. No one says anything as he holds me a few more minutes. Slowly, his arms begin to loosen from around me. Now I am the one trying to hold onto him. We pause, halfway between pulling closer and letting go. A sound from somewhere in the room tips the balance and we lean back. Our hands stay fastened together.
“Mason,” Robin says quietly, “I’m so sorry about what happened to your family, but I don’t understand any of this.”
“What’s to understand,” Evie snaps. “Those Sentinel freaks found his family, probably because some other supposedly trustworthy Caretaker betrayed them, and they killed Mason’s family. Seems pretty straightforward to me.”
Mom puts a hand on Evie’s shoulder and pats her gently. It’s obvious Evie wants to continue harassing Robin, but Mom’s soothing presence is hard to ignore. Evie eventually sits down on the coffee table with an annoyed thud. She lets her gaze slip from Evie to Robin.
“Not that I want to start an argument, but it would appear that Evie is right. What happened to Mason sounds like it happens fairly often.” Mom glances in Mason’s direction with a sad expression, so deep you can almost feel the weight of it on your skin.
Robin shakes her head vehemently. “That’s just the thing, though. What happened to Mason does not happen regularly. Or ever. Like never ever. Sentinels don’t kill Caretakers. It’s never happened before. It just isn’t done.”
“You said yourself that they’re complete psychos,” I remind her.
“Complete psychos when it comes to killing Aerlings. I have never once heard of Sentinels killing Caretakers.” She shakes her head and rubs at her temples. “I mean, why would they? Caretakers are potentially very useful. They can lead them to other Caretakers, but even if that doesn’t happen, they know that family will get another Aerling eventually.”
“Really?” Seems like leading a lamb to the slaughter. If the Sentinels already know that family is a Caretaker, all they have to do is wait for the next one to show up.
Everyone else seems to be thinking the same thing. Robin waves us off, explaining quickly. “Not right away, of course. That would be stupid. It usually takes generations before that family is allowed to have a new Aerling, along with name changes, relocation, the works. Because of what happened to Eliana . . . ” Robin pauses for a moment, taking a deep breath. “Because of her death, I’ll never raise my own Aerling. Not unless they’re really desperate and have no one else. Even if that happened, I’d have to leave my life, start over somewhere new, as someone new, in order to protect the Aerling.”
“You would do that?” Mason asks.
Robin doesn’t even hesitate. “Of course
I would. I know I screwed up with Eliana, but this is my family’s heritage. It’s what I’ve been raised to do, to believe in. It’s my purpose.”
“So, why did the Sentinels kill Mason’s Caretakers?” I ask.
Shaking her head, Robin says, “I have no idea.”
Evie’s hackles start twitching again, so I beat her to the next question. “There has to be a reason. How can we find out what they wanted with Mason’s family? Surely there must be some kind of records we can look at that might give us a clue.”
“Records?” Robin shakes her head. “Maybe at some point there were. You know, before the whole split thing happened. Nobody keeps records like that now because it would be too easy to get into.”
“What about his real family, where he came from?” I demand, exasperation thick in my voice.
Robin stares at me with the infuriating look that says I have once again asked the world’s stupidest question. “We have no idea where Aerlings come from or who their real families are.”
“What?” Mason asks. “But you have to know something.”
“So, what? Aerlings just pop up out of thin air and drop on Caretakers’ doorsteps?” Evie asks. The sarcasm is hard to miss.
“They must come from somewhere,” Mom adds softly. “Someone must deliver them to the Caretakers, Robin. Surely someone will know something that might help Mason.”
Confusion is plastered across Robin’s face. For all her snotty looks, it’s pretty plain that this is the first time she’s actually tried to answer these questions. Apparently, she’s coming up blank. Her eyes dart back and forth to each of us. “I . . . I don’t know.”
“Is there someone who could help us find out?” Mason asks.
Before Robin can answer, I start shaking my head. “No way. We’re not telling anyone else about this. Robin knowing the truth is bad enough.”
Looking wounded, Robin doesn’t jump to her immediate defense. She takes a few moments to gather herself before speaking. “Olivia, I’m not going to hurt Mason. I feel like I have been given a second chance to prove myself and there’s no way I’m going to squander it. Even more, I care about Mason a great deal. I would never do anything to hurt him. Please, you can trust me.”
A great deal? My mind seems stuck on those few words. What right does she have to say that? She’s known him for a couple of weeks. I’ve known Mason for twelve years. I’ve been the one protecting him! Shouldn’t I know how best to keep him safe?
“You can’t tell anyone about Mason,” I say through gritted teeth. “We’ve already got Sentinels sniffing around and breaking into our house. It’s too much of a risk.”
“What if you can’t protect him from this on your own?” Robin asks.
What if? What if Robin had never stumbled into us? What if we continued living our lives just as they were? What if she hadn’t led Sentinels to us, on purpose or not? What if Mason could have just stayed with us forever, safe and lost to this other world Robin claims he belongs in?
The rant continues in my head. It might have continued forever if Mason squeezing my hand didn’t draw my eyes up to his. The blue of his irises are so dark, they’re almost black. The pain filling them makes my heart ache, but what really stops my runaway thoughts is the glint of hope sparkling in the silver ring, turning my thoughts in a new direction.
What if Mason had been forced to continue his life in the background? What if his unhappiness at being the guy no one can see burdened him to the point of misery? What if his true identity had never been revealed and he spent his life feeling like a mistake? What if Robin hadn’t shown up and warned us about Sentinels? What if there is a way to give Mason the life he deserves?
I look over at Mom for help. I don’t know what to do. What if Robin isn’t being honest? If she trusts the wrong person or speaks too candidly and Mason is taken or harmed, I’ll never forgive her. I think Mom sees every thought running through my mind. Her expression is thoughtful as she says, “The choice is yours, Olivia.”
“What? Why?” I need help. I want to cry. I want someone to tell me what to do!
Mom smiles, small and thin. “I love Mason like my own flesh and blood, but he belongs to you more than anyone else. You took him in, took care of him when no one else believed you, protected him. The two of you share a bond more powerful than I can understand. I trust whatever decision you make because I know you would never do anything to put Mason in danger.”
A shaky breath pours out of me as I fall back against the couch. I feel like the weight of the world has just been laid on my shoulders. Or maybe just the weight of Mason’s life. It presses down on me, making me unsure, afraid. Everyone seems to be looking to me for answers, but I don’t have them. I just don’t know.
“What would the other Caretakers do if they found out Mason was living with us?” I ask quietly.
Robin’s mouth pops open, at first eager to fill the silence, but it snaps shut immediately after. Her eyes drop to her lap. “They would insist on taking him to a new Caretaker family.”
The tension in the room triples.
“Not because you guys haven’t done a great job,” Robin hurriedly says, “but just because we have rules, laws. Caretakers make very serious covenants to protect Aerlings with their lives.”
Evie’s face screws up in disgust. “Some people must take those promises more seriously than others.” She sneers at Robin. “We’ve done well enough on our own, no promises needed. For us, it’s enough that we love Mason.”
“Evie!” Mom snaps. The harsh tone surprises everyone. It’s such a rare thing to hear coming out of her mouth. She seems a little surprised herself. After taking a deep breath, Mom continues. “It is not your place to doubt Robin’s love for her Aerling or her devotion to protecting her.”
“But . . . ” Evie begins. Another sharp look from Mom cuts her off.
Mom looks over at Robin. “I apologize for Evie’s attitude. We’re grateful that you’re willing to help us, but I think we all agree that we have no intention of handing Mason over to anyone, Caretaker or Sentinel.”
“Absolutely not,” I agree. My hand tightens around Mason’s. He smiles at me appreciatively and echoes my words.
“I . . . I wasn’t suggesting that,” Robin says. “I don’t want Mason taken away either.”
“Then what?” I ask.
Robin looks up nervously. “I could ask a few questions without mentioning Mason. Find out what I can about where Aerlings come from . . . if anyone even knows.”
“Someone knows,” Mason says, his voice low and very nearly menacing.
“Who would you ask?” I demand. From what she said earlier, they’re cut off from most of the other Caretakers.
The way her shoulders square up gives me hope. “I could ask my parents.”
The hope fades. “No.”
Everyone looks at me with a questioning glance. Really? Am I the only one that sees what a terrible idea that would be? I shake my head, refusing to relent.
“Robin, your parents move you around every few years to protect you from the Sentinels. What do you think they’d do if you started asking questions about Aerlings when you just admitted that you’ll never have one of your own? There’s no way they wouldn’t be suspicious.”
“I would be careful,” Robin says. The defensiveness in her voice in no way changes my mind.
I’m not trying to hurt her feelings, but the snort escapes my lips before I can stop it. “Robin, you’re not subtle. At all. I know you would try, but more likely than not, your first question will tell them something is up. What do you think they would do if you told them you found an orphaned Aerling hanging out with some random family?”
She doesn’t answer.
“They’d freak out, haul you off to who knows where, and send someone to collect Mason.”
I want information, but I will only risk so much to get it. Making sure that Mason is safe is my top priority. Going to the Caretakers is too dangerous. No matter how good of a job
we’ve done hiding and caring for Mason, they’ll want him back. As far as I can figure, they must assume he was killed by the Sentinels that murdered his family. I think it should stay that way.
“I’m sorry, Robin, but we’re going to have to figure this out on our own.”
Surprisingly enough, no one argues with me.
Mom pats my arm gently and nods while Evie continues to glare at Robin. I wasn’t really expecting Evie to side with Robin on anything, so that’s not surprising. I look over at Mason to make sure he’s okay with this plan. He isn’t looking at me, though. A look passes between him and Robin. When they both turn to face me, they nod in agreement, but that wasn’t what their look said a minute ago.
Chapter 15
But Not Everything
(Mason)
I question the wisdom of this plan the farther I get from the house. The light breeze causes a piece of hair to fall in my eyes. I brush it away distractedly as I walk past the green grass and sand of the park Robin and I met at a few days ago. Every step makes me doubt myself and I almost turn back. The sight of Robin waiting for me at the corner spurs me on. I need answers.
I don’t blame Olivia for not wanting to take the risk. I know her main concern is keeping me safe. Once, that would have been enough. Not anymore. It started before Robin ever showed up, this feeling of need, need to know why my family had to die. Why I am different? Would it ever be different for me? Would I ever live a normal life?
When Olivia’s dad started the conversation about college and living arrangements, it was the first time I had thought of those kinds of details. It wasn’t the first time I thought about my future with Olivia.
Robin waits, leaning against the car, pretending to be busy on her phone as she watches my approach. She smiles when I reach her and opens her car door for me. I slip in without a word. Once we’re both settled, Robin turns to me with a concerned expression.
“Are you sure about this?”
I nod wordlessly.
“We can tell Olivia if you want.” She chews on her bottom lip. We both know how that conversation will go. She breathes a sigh of relief when I shake my head no.
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