He rolled us until he straddled me. His gaze traveled down my body, his eyes dark with desire. I let my sight change and watched our auras as they began to meld, both iridescent pink with passion. His was tinged yellow with triumph. He’d been waiting for this.
He leaned his head down, trailing kisses along my breasts and to my stomach. His tongue circled my belly button. I shivered. He unbuttoned my pants and slid them off me. My underwear came next. He ran his tongue along the side of my lips before pressing it against my clit. I arched against him, burying my hands in his hair. The air was thick and hot with the musk of our passion. His fingers dug into my hips as his tongue plunged inside of me. I raised a hand to my mouth, biting down on my finger. I writhed beneath his ministrations, building more and more until I could almost burst. He pulled away, and coldness washed over me. Eternity passed in the mere seconds he was gone. He returned, his hard shaft pressed against me.
His eyes were almost black. “You’re beautiful.”
He rammed his hard cock into me. Our flesh radiated with searing heat. Allegra had disappeared. All that mattered was this man filling me. Our hips met and pulled away in a fast needy rhythm, our moans mixing. The colors of our auras swirled together. I exploded, shattering into a thousand pieces. He stiffened and throbbed inside of me, burying his face in my hair.
He rolled off me, and lay on his back, panting. I rested my head on his shoulder and yawned, my eyes fluttering. John’s warmth had filled me and given me a moment’s respite from the cold reality and illusion of my life. Everything else faded to the background.
CHAPTER THIRTY-FIVE
My problems returned with a headache as the evening sun shone in my eyes. I groaned and buried my face in the pillow. My arm patted the other side of the bed. Empty.
I threw the pillow aside and looked around the room. John had left me alone. On the table sat a tray with a bagel and orange juice. Allegra sat at the table, dangling a note in front of me.
“He’s adorable. So good you found another distraction,” she said. “It doesn’t make a difference.”
I stalked to the bathroom and slammed the door behind me. I let the faucet run, the hot water steaming up the mirror. Every fiber inside me wanted to kill her, but she wasn’t really here. I would just end up attacking a chair or the wall. She had disappeared when I walked back into the room. I picked up the note from the table and scanned it. John had gone to try and find something to stave off my madness. A smile touched my lips. He was starting to remind me of a knight, trying to slay the dragons I couldn’t. I had to do my part too. I was the one with a sword after all.
I had to call a taxi to take me back to the house. Adrian sat in the kitchen. He watched me enter as he stirred his coffee.
“Where have you been?” he asked.
“Out, nothing to do with business.”
He frowned. “Out playing then. While my brother is lying in the hospital.”
“Are you trying to guilt trip me?”
“This doesn’t seem to be the time to play around.”
He was back to finding reasons to blame me again. I’d had a respite since the night of the carnival. I must have annoyed him very much last night. Or perhaps he was taking his frustrations out on me.
“What is your issue with me now?” I asked. “Is it the fact I came back to life?”
He moved to the sink to wash his cup. “Humans can’t do that.”
“It’s part of my curse.”
“Immortality doesn’t sound like much of a curse.”
“It is if I can’t be happy. I’m forced to stay as I am. I can’t grow old . . . I can’t have children. I just die over and over again.”
He paused, glancing at me over his shoulder. “How does it work?”
“I’m not certain. For all purposes I’ve been told I was dead. Over time my body heals and I return to life.”
A thoughtful look crossed his face. “To what extent?”
I tilted my head. “What do you mean?”
“You can be drowned. What about shooting? Decapitation?”
“I was trapped in a burning building once.”
I could still remember the lick of flames on my skin and the smoke that choked my lungs. Allegra stood laughing over me as I lay tied on her floor. I’d found her in a brothel in Sweden. She had once again been seducing men and leading them astray. As a demon of lust, she was adept at this. I’d snuck in there expecting to catch her unaware. She’d caught me instead. The incense she had used knocked me unconscious, along with the rest of the people in the house. When I’d woken, smoke and fire surrounded me. Her parting laugh rang through my ears as the flames consumed me.
“And you are still here,” he said.
“I woke up someplace else months later,” I said.
It had been my old home, the one my son had been born and died in. Of course, this had been over a century later, and the house had been rebuilt with a new family living there. They’d been shocked when I had shown up in their kitchen. They suspected me of being the very beings I hunted. I’d had to flee the entire town that night, but I’d made sure to own that home eventually.
“So, you recuperate. Is it always in the same place?”
“Yes.” My voice warbled at bit.
“Why?”
I glanced up at him, confused. “Why what?”
“Why did it curse you? You said it was a demon, correct?”
“I tried to kill her. I thought I had, but she showed me how wrong I was.”
I could see her again, smiling with her hand covered in my husband’s blood. My baby’s screams still filled my ears. I blinked back the tears, forcing the memory to fade in the background.
“Then, why didn’t she just kill you, like Malantha did Adam or Ose and my parents?”
I met his gaze. In the last question I had actually heard emotion. His eyes held resentment. He wanted to know why I was so special. More deserving. I wasn’t. At least I didn’t think so, but I never had a say in anything that happened. Not with me and not with Adam.
“I think it was because I could see what she was. It caught her attention. And maybe I was the first to hurt her in a long time.”
“As usual, the humans get the short end while the monsters get rewarded.” He set the clean cup down with a loud clink.
I bowed my head. “I wish it had been different.”
“Wishes don’t come true.”
He walked down the hall, away from me. I followed, unsure of what else to do. There wasn’t much of a distance he could put between us.
“This is no gift to me. I can’t change, I can’t die, and I can’t be happy,” I said, my fists clenching.
“But you are still here,” he snapped. “We don’t get to be happy, either. Do you know what happens when a Van Helsing has a child? We die. Hopefully, we get a few years to spend with that child. My father was lucky. He was able to have four of us. But he still died and my mother with him.”
“At least you have the hope of peace. I have a choice of sitting alone somewhere and losing my mind or doing this.”
He sighed with his shoulders slumping. “This isn’t a game of who has it worse.”
“No,” I said, lowering my voice. “But I’m tired of you resenting me for something that I don’t want.”
He looked down at his hands, and for once, I had a glimpse of what he was feeling. I even agreed with him. The world was bad enough with sickness, poverty, and humans killing each other. Add the supernatural on top of that and it was amazing anyone could find a bit of happiness. Most of humanity did it by disbelieving in anything that didn’t fit into their idea of reality. They forgot or found convenient explanations for the otherworldly. Those of us who couldn’t, we fought it, but we were never happy. Marge was right. Our stories remained almost identical except for the names and minor details.
Adrian had a right to be angry. It wasn’t just this generation that had to deal with the creatures of the dark. His family had a legacy and a curse.
And after generations, they were known. Vampires across the world would pay to see the entire bloodline wiped out. Now, the demons were trying to accomplish that goal as well and the Van Helsings rarely ever hunted them. It was all because Andrei wanted to create an organization for hunters. If we survived this, it was a dream I’d make damn sure came true.
“Adrian,” I said and stopped, looking around the silent house. Was he the only one here? “Where’s Tres?”
He shook his head. “I haven’t seen him.”
A chill ran down my spine. “All day?”
I ran to Tres’s room, throwing the door open. Empty. The bed was made, like it hadn’t been slept in. I turned and started when I found Allegra standing directly behind me.
“One down, two more that you will get killed,” she whispered.
Adrian watched me oddly as I skirted around her and headed back to him. “What are you doing?”
I held a finger up. “Esais, have you seen Tres?”
“No, why?” He still sounded exhausted.
“I think he’s missing.”
There was a pause. “I can’t sense his thoughts.”
“What does that mean? Is he dead?” It felt as if a hand closed over my heart. Could Allegra’s words be true?
“No, I would have felt that. He’s unconscious. I can’t pinpoint exactly, though.”
I shivered again and looked to Adrian. “I think Ose has Tres.”
A mask shifted over his face. “Where?”
I spoke aloud this time so Adrian could be included. “Did anyone at the asylum see him?”
“No,” Esais said after a moment. “Not even the third floor.”
“We check the fair, then.” I nodded to Adrian. “Call Marge. I’ll get my things. Oh, and bring your toys. I want this place taken out permanently.”
I headed to my room and closed the door behind me. Tres was still alive. We had to hurry to make sure he stayed that way.
“You’re just going to get these boys killed.” Allegra sat on my bed, with one leg crossed over the other.
She was taunting me now. As always, she wanted me to doubt myself, to break. That wouldn’t happen. For over four hundred years, I hadn’t broken. I certainly wouldn’t due to a facsimile from my own mind. I changed clothes and sheathed my knives.
“You can keep ignoring me, but I won’t leave,” she said. “I’ll always be with you.”
I picked up my sundang, examining the blade. The sharpness hadn’t worn down. How I wished to plunge it in her heart and watch the life drain away.
“You’re going to fail your Dimitri again,” she said.
“Don’t talk about him,” I snapped, spinning around.
Her smile widened. Now she had elicited a response from me. “Oh, but it’s true. Even if you fight Ose, these children will die.”
“Stop saying that,” I said. “It won't happen.”
“Your track record says otherwise.”
“They'll all get though of this,” I said, “even if I have to sacrifice myself.”
“How would you do that?" Allegra asked. “You can't die.”
I looked down at my sword, unable to answer.
CHAPTER THIRTY-SIX
Again I stood before the Enchanted Castle in the dead of night. This time I carried two gas cans in my hands. Adrian and Marge stood beside me. I stared up at the painted stones and trembled. The drawbridge beckoned us in. Wisps of shadows danced on my peripheral, and it felt as if my mind itched. I didn’t want to look at this with my second sight. It would be the same.
“How do you want to do this?” I asked.
“You spread the gas, and I will set the charge,” Adrian said.
“Charge?”
He held a small cylinder. “It only took a few moments, while you moped in your room and Marge came back from whatever she was doing.”
“I wasn’t moping.”
“Just like you’re human. Not the point now, we need to douse the inside and outside. Once we are a safe distance, I will activate the charge. It will create a spark to start the fire.”
“I’m not going back in there,” Marge said. “I’ll do whatever you need out here, but I sure as hell am not going inside.”
My grip tightened on the handle of the gas can as I turned back to the funhouse. If I had a choice, I wouldn’t go back in either. That would leave Adrian alone in there, however. Despite my wanting to ignore them, Allegra’s words stuck with me. I would not let this Van Helsing be killed. Nor his brothers. I hadn’t been there for Adam, but I would for them.
“I suppose that leaves the two of us,” I said. “Do you need to set the charge inside?”
He nodded.
“I go with you and pour the gas.” I hesitated, looking up to the second floor. A cold sweat broke over my skin, and I smacked my lips at the dryness in my mouth.
“Would you like me to go first?” Adrian asked.
“Since you volunteered,” I set one of the gas cans in front of Marge. “We’ll meet back here.”
Adrian snorted and took a step towards the bridge. Marge grabbed the gas can and headed for the back. I pulled a flashlight out and shone it at the dark hole. The funhouse was powered down this time. I sighed with both disappointment and relief. I’d hoped Ose had been the one to have Tres, but he wasn’t here. We would have to deal with him later. For now, we needed to get Tres and remove this as a base of operations. Adrian stopped at the entrance and looked back at me. His finger tapped on the side of the building with a steady rap.
“Are you coming?” he asked.
I gave the building another glance before catching up with him. He shook his head at me and stepped inside. With no power, the first trap remained motionless. I splashed the gasoline on the wall, the stench swirling around me. My chest tightened as we walked. I kept my focus on Adrian and ignored the fact I could touch both walls. I’d conquered this room before; I could walk through it again.
“Why are you staring at me?” Adrian said.
I jumped at the sound of his voice. Even though I had my eyes on him, I hadn’t actually seen him. Heat flooded my face, and I shifted my gaze to the ground.
“Nothing,” I said. “Are you ready to move on?”
He turned and headed to the stairs. They remained dark. I inhaled, counting to ten before following him up. The walls in the next hall stood frozen, staggered throughout. Some were widened normally while others looked like you couldn’t fit a small child through. Adrian continued on without a pause. He weaved through several walls, proving my perception was off. I gulped and followed suit. Halfway through, I couldn’t go any further. I turned my head again and stared at the wall in front of me. It almost touched my nose while the back of my head rested against the opposite wall. Had it moved closer? It was so tight. The fumes of the gasoline lightened my head. It looked as if the walls were angled, making the move forward even tighter. The way back looked the same. I was stuck.
“What is the problem?” Adrian asked from the end of the room.
“I’m stuck,” I called.
“Nonsense,” he said. “I made it through.”
“The walls tightened.”
“Oh, for . . . ”
Sounds of his return echoed down the hall, scraping at times as he slid through the tighter spots. I tried to focus on the sound instead of the fact I was being crushed to death. He just shook his head when he caught sight of me. I imagined I looked pretty pathetic with my eyes all wide and sweat pouring down my pale face.
“Give me your hand.” He held out his hand for me to take.
“It’s too tight, I’ll never fit,” I said between pants.
“It hasn’t gotten any tighter since I went through. Now do you want to be caught by the police?”
No, I didn’t. Once again, it would lead to too many questions and charges for trespassing and arson. That is, if Adrian didn’t decide to blow up the funhouse around me. He was the type of man to do it. After all, I was just a monster to him. I took his han
d, and he yanked me out. The wall scraped my chest, pulling my breasts in directions they didn’t belong, but after a few seconds, I was free. I stood there for several seconds, sucking in a lungful of air before nodding that we could move on. We made it through the rest of the hall without another episode from me. He held my hand the entire way.
I froze when we reached the mirror maze. My reflections stared back at me from under the black, hooded jacket. Adrian merely shrugged and moved on. I rubbed my arms and followed behind him.
“Where is all that confidence?” he asked.
“I had a bad experience here,” I said.
“Get over it.”
It was like nothing fazed him. He feared nothing and expected the same from those around him. Well, he did distrust and dislike. It was infuriating. I glared at him, blowing a lock of hair from my eyes.
Allegra smiled at me and waved her red-tipped fingers at me as I we passed the next mirror. I shook my head and stepped back. A stretched reflection of me stared back. I rubbed my eyes and fought the panic that rose in me. Her laughter filled the room. I jumped, looking around.
“Did you hear that?” I asked.
Adrian looked behind him. “Other than your incessant chatting?”
I turned to glare at him, but stopped when she laughed again. It was warm and sultry as always and as always, it roiled my stomach. I spun around and caught sight of her in all the mirrors. She held baby Marco in her arms. She tossed him at me. He slipped through my hands and hit the floor, his tiny body flopping.
I screamed, pulling at my hair, and backed into the corner. My chest tightened again, and my breath came out in short gasps. The room began to spin as my heart pounded in my ears. I had to sit down. She towered over me, all around me. They drew closer, allowing no escape. I wrapped my arms around my head and whimpered. I snapped my eyes shut. These were just more visions, more evidence of my madness. I counted to ten in hopes they would be gone when I opened my eyes again.
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