We bypass a ladies’ room and travel farther down the hall. Grace’s main agent follows us at a discreet distance. We take a turn down another hallway and find a more private restroom. A quick look shows it’s empty.
“Thank God,” Grace exclaims rather dramatically, although I remember what it was like to have a baby sitting on your bladder like that, so I get it. “Jake’s giant baby is Irish folk dancing on my now very teeny tiny bladder. I thought I was going to die.”
“Well, we’re all glad you didn’t,” Jules says.
I smirk at her in the gold-framed mirror. It takes a brave woman to throw shit at the First Lady of the United States. Granted, they’ve been friends since they were freshman in college, so they’ve probably seen each other through a world of shit. The thought makes my heart pang. While they had each other, I had no one. But now I have them. Thank God for that.
Grace comes out of the stall and washes her hands. As she’s reapplying her lipstick, two women walk in the restroom, laughing and clearly enjoying themselves.
“Did you see the way Jake was looking at you?” the blonde asks. “He clearly can’t wait to get his hands on you, and who could blame him? His wife is the size of a barn.”
“And I can’t wait for him to get his hands on me.” The redhead laughs. “He’s so good with his hands.”
They come around the corner and see us standing there. I barely keep from rolling my eyes. Actually, I don’t think I was very successful at it, because the redhead narrows her beady little eyes at me. This was a mean-girl ambush if ever I saw one, and I should know; I have an eight-year-old daughter, and even she’s a better orchestrator than these idiots.
“Oh!” The redhead gasps in mock horror. “You weren’t supposed to hear that.”
“You don’t say,” Grace drawls.
“I never wanted you to find out about us this way,” she carries on, and it’s the most ridiculous show of theatrics I have ever seen.
“Sure, sure,” Grace says.
“It’s just that you know Jake and I have known each other for so long, and our families go way back. One thing just kind of led to another,” she says. “You know how it is.”
I kind of wonder if Grace is going to rip her hair out for insinuating that Jake is having an affair with this piece of trash. Hell, I kind of want to rip her hair out, but I’m a guest of an important person at the White House, so that’s probably frowned upon. I’m just about to open my mouth to suggest we find somewhere else to go, when Jules laughs. She doesn’t just laugh; she snickers that little laugh of someone clearly trying to hold it in and then inch by inch, giggle by giggle, she’s bent over in full-blown belly laughs.
“I don’t see what’s so funny,” the redhead snaps.
“You are,” Jules says, wiping a tear from her eye. “Like anyone would believe that load of horse shit that just spewed from your mouth. Everyone can see Jake is madly in love with his wife. You’re just mad it’s not you after the military campaign you waged last year for his ring. Right, Cara?”
“Right,” I laugh awkwardly, but I think I cover it well in the name of the sisterhood and all that. “Jake is full gone for Grace. Anyone can see that. The thought of him cheating is laughable at best. Good one.”
“I wouldn’t be so quick to laugh if I were you,” she says, turning on me. “Amy was talking to Rick earlier, and he was very interested. If you know what I mean.”
“Oh, I do, and I’m not worried.” I am. It’s a lie. I wonder all the time what he’s doing with me. Especially after all I have put him through. But when I think about his never taking another woman to his bed, I know that maybe we have a chance, if everything works out like it’s supposed to. Besides, this chick is just a bitch. What do I care what she thinks? I have enough of my own garbage going around in my head.
“We should probably get going, ladies,” Grace says to Jules and me. “Nice seeing you again, Ashley.”
“Don’t think you’ll keep him!” she whisper-hisses as we leave. “He will come back to me. He always comes back to me.” And then the door closes, cutting off her venomous tirade.
“Wow,” I whisper. “What a bitch.”
We wind our way back through the crowd, and Jake steals Grace away, their duty for the evening done. Jules and I say goodnight, and then Rick materializes beside me. The way he moves so quietly always surprises me.
“Ready to go?” he asks me.
“I thought you’d never ask,” I reply, making Jules laugh.
“Be good, kids,” she says, kissing me on the cheek, and then she too is gone.
Rick leads me out to the town car that is waiting to take us home. He loads me up inside and takes me back to his house. I don’t even think about going to my own empty home. There’s nothing there for me without Rick and Rachel. He’s somehow cemented my life and his together in just a few days.
He thanks the driver and leads me into the house. My feet are killing me, and I can’t wait to take my shoes off. It’s a shame to drop three-thousand-dollar shoes by the door, but I literally can’t go another step with them on my feet tonight.
Rick takes my hand in his and leads me up the stairs to his bedroom. Gently, tenderly, we undress each other, carefully folding our fancy clothes in neat piles or draping them over the bench at the foot of the bed.
And only when we both stand before each other with ourselves completely laid bare does he lead me to the bed, where he makes love to me in a way that he never has before, with a passion so wild and a love that is felt soul-deep.
And when we both find completion held tight in each other’s arms, Rick tucks the covers around us, and I fall asleep safely in his arms, never knowing it would probably be the last time, because he had a plan in place to change the game and smoke out the kidnappers, and for that lack of knowledge, I was going to die.
“POTUS and FLOTUS Spend Peaceful Sunday with Powerful Friends”
Chapter 20
Everything changed
Here’s the thing about last days. Unless you’re on death row, you never know yours is coming.
Otherwise, you would have had pancakes instead of oatmeal for breakfast or maybe even ice cream. You would make love one more time, maybe with the windows open in the early morning so that you can smell the coming rain.
Maybe you say goodbye to family and friends and tell them how much they mean to you. Or you go out and spend a boatload of money that you didn’t have—or maybe you did.
Or you would dance in the rain.
There are so many things I could have done differently, but in the end, I wouldn’t have changed a thing.
This morning, Rick woke me with his hand moving between my thighs. By the time my eyes opened and I knew what was happening, I was wet and needy, my climax rapidly barreling down on me, and there was no stopping it.
“Rick, please,” I begged. “I need you.”
And then he positioned his cock at my entrance and drove deep inside me.
Lately, Rick had been gentle and tender with me, always loving, but the way he fucked me this morning spoke volumes of the way everything has changed. Something was riding him hard, and he expended the energy that had woken him early this morning by joining our bodies with a fierce desperation.
Other than my initial plea for him, no words were spoken between us, but then again, I guess there didn’t need to be. With every plunge into my waiting body, Rick showed me how much he needed me. He told me without words how important I am to him. And in kind, I showed him the same with the way I clung to him, how my hips rose up to meet his with a wildness we both felt, that he was it for me. There would never be anyone for me like Rick.
My climax didn’t wash over me gently but seemed to detonate every molecule of my being. My entire world was spinning out of control and my tether to the here and now was where Rick’s body was joined with my own.
I felt him swell inside me before he planted himself deep and let out a rough groan while he found his own bliss within me.
>
He dropped his forehead down to mine and closed his eyes. This was it. This was right. I never should have denied Rick. I should have trusted him then and now. We were always meant to be together. We’re like the earth and the moon, always circling each other, never able to escape the pull of the other. He is my partner, my lover, my everything, and I will never not trust him again.
“I love you,” he said, his voice thick with unspoken emotion and gruff-sounding.
“I love you,” I whispered back.
He pulled me tighter into his arms before releasing me. I missed him immediately as he pulled out and got up and headed for the shower. I should’ve known that something was amiss. Instead, I lazed in bed while he showered. I trusted him to tell me when things changed.
What I didn’t know was that I while was welcoming him home with my body, my heart, my very soul, Rick was saying goodbye with his.
“Where is White House Chief of Staff’s Daughter?”
Chapter 21
A lie
I feel restless.
The house is full of people. I thought Rick and I would spend the day together, talking about what needed to be done. I wanted to tell him my thoughts in private about reaching out to the kidnapper again. Maybe I could talk to them, find out something, anything, but once again, he had other plans he didn’t share with me.
It’s hard to trust someone who doesn’t offer you the tools to do so. I’m struggling to rationalize the man who demands I give him my complete blind faith in his ability to save our daughter. He wants me to trust him to get the job done, but at the same time, he gives me nothing in return.
This morning, I jumped in the shower after he walked out with a towel slung low around his narrow hips. I thought we would talk today and be honest with each other, but I was wrong.
While I was in the shower, Rick was busy making phone calls and putting his own plans in place. And when I came downstairs in leggings and a T-shirt, the house was full of people.
“We brought takeout,” Captain Black says as he and Jules walk in the front door. The house is already filled with Jake and Grace, Joe and Gus, and Wes. I’ve clearly missed a lot while my head was in the clouds.
“And coffee,” she adds. “Lots and lots of coffee.”
“What’s all this?” I ask, and Grace cringes.
I can tell by the look on her face that she knew this was coming last night and kept the truth from me. All it takes is one look around the room to realize they all knew, and no one said a goddamned thing. My face heats with embarrassment. I always knew I didn’t belong in this tight-knit crowd. This group of wealthy, powerful people, and me, the girl who grew up poor in foster care, the one puzzle piece that never quite fit.
The hot tears from this unbearable realization sting the backs of my eyes. They all see it. I never hid a damn thing from them while I was playing pretend. Pretending I didn’t love Rick. Pretending I could have it all. I’ve spent the last few days living in his house and forgetting that in the end I wouldn’t have a goddamned thing.
I rub the back of my hand against my temple where a pulse is begging to throb.
“Can I get you a cup of coffee, honey?” Jules asks gently.
“No,” I answer just a little too sharply to be believable as anything I tried to pass off, and we all know it, so I give them the partial truth. “I have a headache. I think I had just a little too much champagne last night.”
“Okay, but—” she starts, and I can’t let her finish. I’ll lose it. I’ll lose my tight hold on the control I have on my emotions. I can’t cry in front of these people who aren’t bad people; they’re just not my people, and they never were. It’s not their fault they’ve had each other for a lifetime, and I’ve had no one. I have to let them go without making them feel guilty for it.
“I’m just going to lie down,” I say quickly. “Let me know if you need me.”
I turn and look at Rick, my words holding more meaning for him. He stands the farthest away from where I am, casually leaning against the counter. He watches me. Rick watches every damn move I make. He watches me struggle to breathe, to get out of the room fast enough.
And he doesn’t say one word to stop me.
I take three steps casually, and then as soon as I’m out of their sight, I scurry up the stairs like a little rat. I hate it. I hate this is me, but it is me. This is what I do; I run.
I make it into the master bedroom, and I quickly lock the door behind me. I couldn’t bear it if someone saw me so pathetically broken and alone. I need to emerge from this with at least some tiny shreds of my dignity and pride left so I can find my daughter and leave. Maybe we’ll settle in New Mexico this time. Or even Sedona. I hear the desert is beautiful in winter.
But is it fair to take Rachel from her father? Again. It’s not, and in my head, I know that. My broken heart has absolutely nothing to do with his ability as a dad.
I look around and see Rick’s domain. The dark furniture and gray bedding. The lack of bright color and decoration. There’s a handful of my stuff around the room, but that’s it. My lotion on the bedside table with my cell phone plugged into the charger. My bright floral-print robe is draped over the chair in the corner, and the earrings he gave me sit in a little floral ceramic dish on the dresser.
Seeing them reminds me of all he said and did to show me that we were an us.
And it was all a lie.
My hands shake as I raise them up in front of me. My breath is thready as it saws in and out of my chest, and the tear I held back in the kitchen spills and rolls down my cheek. Another follows quickly on its heels.
And then with my thumb and index finger, I slide the gold and diamond band off my forever finger. It was never meant to wear any adornment there. I’m not meant to belong to anyone or have anyone belong to me.
I drop it in the bowl with the beautiful earrings and all the promises they held and let the rest of my heart shatter.
I look over my shoulder to the bed that this morning felt like it held so much love and promises between two people who were devoted to each other. Now, it feels like it was just another stack of lies and unkept promises.
I look back to the door. It stands there like a heavy symbol of the wall between the two camps, the dichotomy between everyone and me. I could straighten myself out and go back out there. I could continue to pretend they aren’t all lying to me. That they care about me and my daughter, when their loyalties lie with Rick and Rick alone.
Even the idea of going back out there makes my stomach turn. I can’t handle it. I know I can’t. I can’t go back there and watch them all watching me, so I turn back to the bed and climb in. The pillows smell like Rick’s aftershave, and I pull one into my chest and hold it tight, because in my heart of hearts, I know holding him again isn’t an option. We can’t keep lying to each other the way we were. It hurts too much. We’re going to have to figure out the co-parenting thing when we get Rachel back, but after that, no.
Was Captain Black ever a bad guy, or was it just another opportunity to keep an eye on me?
I pull the covers over my head just in time for the first sob to bubble up to the surface. It hurts so much. Loving someone shouldn’t hurt.
I hold my breath when I hear footsteps on the stairs. I don’t want anyone to bother me. I can’t bear to face them right now. Maybe not ever.
The doorknob rattles.
“It’s locked,” I hear Grace whisper followed by a light knock on the door.
“Honey, are you all right?” Rick asks softly. His tone makes me feel like he cares, but in my head and in my heart, I know it’s a lie. I don’t need Maury Povich to open the results to know he’s full of shit.
I don’t answer them.
“Do you think she’s all right?” Grace asks him.
“She’ll be fine,” he answers tersely. “She’s probably just sleeping. It was a late night last night.”
“But don’t you think we should have told her…” Grace’s voice trails of
f.
“Absolutely not,” Rick says. “She has enough on her mind.”
Oh, I have plenty on my mind. I want to throw open the door and tell them both what a bag of dicks they all are for keeping shit from me. Making me trust them when they never trusted me. But I don’t.
“But Rick—”
“Just leave it alone,” he snaps.
A short while later, I hear their footsteps retreat down the stairs where I’m left with my thoughts. I wonder if I got Grace alone if she’d admit to me what’s really going on. Or has she been suitably warded from doing so by Rick and his merry band of asshole buddies. It sucks when the man who wants to keep you in the dark is the same one who is friends with some of the most powerful people in the world.
I wipe my eyes with the back of my hand. I wonder if I could sneak down the stairs and get her attention before everyone else noticed me. Could I separate her from the group and get some much-needed information out of her?
But I don’t get to put my plan into motion, because my phone rings.
And when I answer it, everything changes.
“New from the Hill: Controversial Bill Will Be Reintroduced Monday”
Chapter 22
Backfire
“Hello?” I whisper into my phone.
When it rang, I snatched it up off the nightstand and slid my finger over the glass to unlock it as fast as I could. Everyone I know is here in this house, so the only person who would be calling me is the kidnapper. And I need to talk to them. I’ll do whatever it takes to get Rachel back, even if it’s to a life that no longer has me in it.
“I thought you would have learned your lesson by now,” the robotic voice says.
“I did,” I whisper furiously. “I did. I’ll do whatever you say.”
“Then why are you living with Mr. Donovan?” the voice asks.
Caught by the Chief of Staff (A Presidential Affair Book 2) Page 16
