Anaconda: A Sexy Romantic Comedy

by Landish, Lauren

  April smiled wider. "Alright, let's begin. First man up! Please state your name before walking down the runway."

  "Aubrey."

  Aubrey was a skinny blonde guy, with high cheekbones, blue eyes, and an average package . . . though we weren't supposed to be judging bulge sizes. Besides that, he certainly fit the bill, but I wasn't too impressed by him.

  Aubrey walked down the platform onto the runway with an awkward gait, his expression stoic and lifeless. He posed for a moment and then walked toward the judges, turned, and then made his way back onto the platform.

  April scribbled something on her notebook and I wondered if I should be doing the same.

  "He's too skinny," Gabe whispered. "Even by industry standards."

  "Well?" April pressed me. "We don't have all day, Vicky. You gotta be quick."

  "I wasn't impressed," I admitted finally, feeling sick to my stomach.

  April nodded and then turned to beam happily at the young man. "Thank you for coming, Aubrey. You'll hear back from us if you’re selected.” I watched her cross the young man's name off the list as he walked off.

  "Don't worry about it, honey," Gabe whispered to me, seeing the trepidation on my face. "That guy will find work with one designer or the other. And stop worrying about judging these dudes. They got into modeling to be judged on their looks and bodies, and if they can’t handle it, they don’t need to be in this business."

  Gabe's words did little to ease me of my anxiety as the next guy stepped up.

  "Jake."

  Jake was tall and auburn-haired with a masculine jawline and a toned body. I had to admit that I liked what I saw.

  He walked down the walkway with a smile, winking at the judge table before walking back. Even his butt was cute.

  "He's a keeper," Gabe whispered immediately.

  In thought, April chewed her pen for a second and turned to me. "What do you think?"

  "I'm with Gabe, but are we supposed to sit here and discuss them all or can we just scribble down our thoughts and move this along?”

  April stared at me for a moment before shaking her head. “Just trying to get you used to it all, honey.” She turned her head to Jake. “Thank you, Jake.” She smiled at the handsome man. "Next!"

  I sat through the next wave of models, trying to be the best judge I could be. I hated every time I had to be truthful and vote against a candidate, but over time my anxiety waned just a bit. I realized that I had a long way to go before I could even aspire to be in a position similar to Christine.

  An hour later, and we’d dwindled the room down to just a dozen or so remaining. The eye candy was nice and all, but I’d had enough. I was ready to go.

  After another contestant left, I took a sip of the bottled water I had in front of me and lowered my head to check my notes while the next guy stepped up and announced his name.

  "Tyler."

  My head snapped up fast at the deep, familiar baritone. I knew that voice. But it can’t be, can it?

  What in the hell?

  There, standing on the platform like he owned it and making the other men around him look like little boys, was Tyler in all of his masculine glory, a cocky grin on his face and that mischievous sparkle in his eyes.

  How the hell did I miss him?

  I froze, staring at Tyler, who was looking at me with that grin that I’d found so hard to resist. My whole body was trembling.

  April seemed to still have her wits about her. “What are you doing here, Mr. Locklin?" she demanded.

  Tyler kept his eyes on me. "What do you mean? I'm here to model underwear . . . like everyone else."

  April scowled. "Really? All you’re doing is disrespecting the judges and all the models here, wasting everyone’s time.”

  Tyler shrugged. "I had to do what I had to do.”

  April glanced at me, noting that I was frozen in place but trembling. "Well, it's obvious that she doesn't want to talk to you. I think you’ve done enough."

  “Speak for yourself, honey,” Gabe interjected. “He can disrespect me all he wants, whenever he wants,” Gabe said, admiring Tyler's incredible body.

  "Shut up, Gabe!" April snapped. She turned her eyes back on Tyler, her expression stony. “Please leave, Tyler.” April said coldly. “We need to finish this up.”

  Tyler didn't respond, and instead made his way toward the judges’ table. By this time, my heart was pounding and I could hardly breathe.

  "Victoria," Tyler pleaded. "Please talk to me. I can explain what happened that night you walked in on me and Candice. If you let me." He reached out his hand to me when I didn’t respond. “Come on,” he urged, nodding toward the exit. “We can go out into the waiting room and talk."

  I stared at his hand like it was poisonous, dueling emotions roiling through my body like a tidal wave.

  “Tyler, don’t make me have to call security,” April commanded.

  Tyler ignored her, pleading with those beautiful eyes of his. “Please, Victoria. All I’m asking for is a chance to tell you the truth.”

  “Oh, to hell with this,” Gabe chipped in. “Vicky, you best take your cute little ass out there and hear him out! The man is making a fool of himself just to talk to you.”

  Gabe’s words had a slight effect on me as I stared into Tyler’s handsome face.

  Maybe I should hear him out. I mean, Gabe might be right. Why would Tyler go through all this trouble to see me after all this time unless he cares for me?

  I almost did it. I almost reached out and took his hand.

  "I'm calling security," April growled, taking my silence as proof that I was mortified and didn’t want to talk to him.

  "Don't!" I jumped to my feet, grabbed my water bottle and dashed the rest of the contents into Tyler's face. "Go fuck yourself!" I yelled.

  Then I turned and ran from the room sobbing.

  Tyler

  Shit. That didn’t go so well.

  I wiped the water out of my eyes, feeling some of it drip down my neck, down my chest and beyond as the judges whispered amongst each other, casting glances my way.

  April looked taken aback by Victoria’s sudden burst of anger, frozen for several moments. Then she stood up and rose on her tip toes to look over my shoulder. “Thank you all for coming,” she said loudly. “I’m very sorry about the unexpected disruption. For those of you who are interested, we will resume at noon tomorrow. Ashley will show you out.”

  The last remaining models were quickly ushered out by a young woman who looked like a model herself.

  “You guys can leave as well,” April said to her fellow judges. “I’ll keep the votes and notes and hand them over to Christine when she comes back.”

  After several furtive whispers, the other judges, except for Gabe, got up and began walking out.

  April turned on me when they were gone, her eyes furious. “What the hell was that?” she demanded. “All you’re going to do is get Vicky into trouble with a stunt like that.”

  I shrugged. “That wasn’t my intention. I just need five minutes with her. Five minutes.”

  April scowled. “And that makes it right?” she growled. “You need to go and never come—” She paused and stared at me suspiciously. “Wait a minute. How did you know that Victoria would even be here? She doesn’t usually work the judging panel.”

  I gave her a crooked grin. “I have my ways.”

  “Ugh!” April snarled. “You are so infuriating! I see why Victoria would get so pissed off when talking about you.” April placed her hands on her hips. “Look, it’s obvious your little stunt didn’t work. So you’d better just head on out. I don’t know what Christine will do about this, but I hope she puts your nuts in a vice. You need to be taught a lesson.”

  I shook my head. "I'm not leaving until I talk to her. At this point, I don’t care what happens.”

  "I was hoping I wouldn't have to do this," April sighed. She made a flipping motion with her hand. "Gabe, please get security."

  Gabe looked reluc
tant. “Why don’t we just . . .”

  "Gabe!" April cracked. "Now!"

  "Alright!" whined Gabe, slowly getting up. "Don't get your panties all in a bunch."

  He made it couple of steps before I said sternly, "Wait."

  Gabe paused, turning around to regard me, his eyebrow raised.

  "Hear me out," I said to April. "Just let me tell you my side of the story and I'll leave."

  April pursed her lips, undecided.

  “Five minutes,” I urged. "I just want Victoria to know that I . . .” A lump appeared in my throat, making it difficult to speak. "That I love her," I finally managed. It was hard to say it. I’d been thinking it for a long time, but my words were carefully chosen. I knew it would give April pause.

  Shock etched across April's face at my announcement, exactly what I was hoping for. Even I was surprised by it. It felt very strange to have those words come out of my mouth, especially after I'd sworn to never fall in love with a girl again.

  “Wow,” April gulped. “I was almost convinced. But not quite.”

  “Go on,” Gabe persuaded. “That can’t be all?”

  “Gee, thanks for your support,” I muttered.

  Gabe winked.

  “Promise me that if I don’t like what you have to say, you’ll put an end to this and never bother Victoria again.”

  I grinned. “Promise.”

  April stared at me suspiciously for a long time before letting out a huge sigh. "Fine, but make it quick."

  Chapter 26

  Victoria

  How dare he show up like that? I thought, standing before the large window of Christine’s office with my arms crossed and looking out at the darkening skyline.

  After I’d run from the auditioning room, crying my eyes out, I made it back to the top floor, locking myself in Christine’s office. There I felt safe, away from everyone. I'd gotten myself together and resumed my duties, working to try to forget what happened.

  Still, there'd been a part of me that wanted to run back down and confront Tyler just as fast as I’d run out, to call him the scum of the earth, a lying bastard. It took all of my discipline, repeating an empowering litany over and over in my head, to stay put.

  No, I was better off without him in my life.

  A knock on the wall jolted me back from thought. "Hey Miss Boss Lady!"

  April walked into the office, a concerned look on her face.

  "Hey," I replied. I hadn't seen April since I ran from the auditioning room, and I wondered if she was mad at me. "How'd everything go?"

  April walked over and set some papers down on Christine's desk and sighed. "Awful. I had to call off the rest of the audition. It's being rescheduled for tomorrow. I've already called Christine and confirmed. She was angry about it, but I think she has too much on her plate right now to worry about it. That is, as long as everything gets taken care of tomorrow.” April twisted one of her side ponytails around her index finger, looking thoughtful. "Something about Patty White is giving her an ulcer."

  I know all about it, I thought.

  "What about Tyler?" I asked. I hated how eager I sounded.

  April stopped fooling with her hair and looked at me. "I sent him away."

  "Did you have to call security?" For some reason that was important to me. I liked the idea of Tyler fighting with security guards and getting thrown out on his ass. It would show his cocky ass right.

  April shook her head. "No, he left on his own."

  "Oh." I sounded so disappointed.

  April walked over to stand next to me and placed a hand on my shoulder, looking me directly in the eyes. "Are you okay?" she asked with concern.

  For a moment, I thought about lying, but then I thought better of it. Since my ordeal with Tyler, April had been a great friend. She only wanted what was best for me.

  "At first I wasn’t,” I replied. "I cried and cried, but then I slowly pulled it together." I sniffed. "Someone had to do the work around here."

  "That's good," April said softly. "But I have a question."

  "Huh?"

  "Did you ever give Tyler a chance to explain why that girl was there that day?”

  I scowled. "No, why should I? The skank was holding his dick while he was half-naked. What is there to explain? That she wasn't real? That I was having delusions? Please, April." I thought it was odd that April, who'd been the very one condemning Tyler, was asking if I'd given him a chance to explain his lies to me.

  April studied me, understanding in her eyes. "Sometimes, Vicky, things aren't what they seem."

  I glowered. "What the hell is that supposed to mean?"

  Instead of answering, April turned toward the window. "It sure is a beautiful view at dusk," she murmured appreciatively.

  Doesn’t beat the view from Tyler's office, I thought.

  "It is," I admitted, wondering what April’s deal was. "A beautiful view and an ugly day."

  "It wasn't that bad."

  Are you kidding me?

  I turned away and walked over to Christine's desk, ready to go home. April was suddenly acting too weird for me. "It's time to get out of here.” I paused, looking around the desk to make sure Christine’s things were exactly how she liked them.

  "Hey, April."

  "What's up?"

  "Can you tell Gabe to bring Christine's White Book before you go? He came by here a bit ago, asking to borrow it. I want everything to be where it’s supposed to be when Christine gets here. She'll have a fit if it isn't here in the morning," I said.

  April turned to regard me, a twinkle in her eye. "Sure. I'll send him up as soon as I track him down." She walked toward the office doorway but stopped to ask, "Do you need anything?"

  Okay, now I really know she's acting weird.

  I crossed my arms. "No. Just that book. Now,” I said with my best Christine impression.

  April saluted me with a laugh. "Right on it, Boss."

  I gagged. “Gross.”

  Leaving a peal of laughter in her wake, April left the office, practically skipping out.

  "Weirdo," I muttered when she was gone.

  While killing time for Gabe, I went about tidying up Christine's office, making sure nothing was out of place. Christine was a neat freak, and if she came back with so much as a pen out of place, I was sure I'd never hear the end of it.

  I still couldn't believe that she'd let me run her office for a day. Me, the girl she'd practically tortured since coming to work for her. Me, the girl who thought she was doomed to be a slave for Christine for most of her adult life, only to be tossed to the wayside when she wasn't needed.

  But things were beginning to change. Christine started treating me with at least a hint of respect, and she obviously had enough faith in me to give me this opportunity.

  All in all, I thought I did a good job if not for the disaster in the audition room, even if I was practically an answering machine.

  "C'mon, Gabe, where are you?" I muttered, glancing at Christine's antique clock on the wall. I was already here later than normal. The sun had sunk behind the horizon, leaving a darkened skyline twinkling with lights.

  Sighing in frustration, I sat down at Christine's desk and called Gabe's extension. I didn't know why he was taking so damn long. He worked several floors below me, but he still should've been burning wheels to get that book back to me. He was usually the first one out the door every day.

  The phone rang several times before his answering machine picked up. "This is Gabriel, your fashion divanista. I'll get back to you guys whenever I feel like it . . . BITCHES!"

  Beep.

  I swear to God, he only had that message somehow specifically for me. There’s no way he’d survived working for Christine that long with a voicemail like that. “Gabe, what the hell are you doing?" I demanded. "I'm ready to go home. Why aren't you here yet? You know who’s going to be killed when Christine comes back in tomorrow morning looking for . . .”

  "This?" asked a deep voice at the doorway.

&n
bsp; I looked up and my heart jumped in my chest.

  Tyler.

  Again.

  He was standing in the doorway, this time with clothes on, a tux, no less, holding Christine's White Book in his hands. Five o’clock shadow shaded his jaw as he grinned at me with his enigmatic eyes.

  I swear on my life, he never looked more hot and sexy than in that moment. What the hell did he do between now and the last time I saw him? I wondered, awed that he would show up looking so formal just for me.

  "What—" I began.

  "Am I doing here?" Tyler finished for me.

  It felt like the cat had my tongue. I nodded.

  "I've come to see you, what else?” He said, as if it was plainly obvious. "And to bring you this book." Keeping his eyes on me, he swaggered over to Christine's desk and set the book down before me.

  April must have known about this . . . that’s why she was acting so differently.

  "At your service, Madame," Tyler said dutifully, treating me to a majestic bow. His charm was powerful; it always had been.

  Don’t fall for his antics and let him prey on your emotions, that annoying voice urged. Get him out of here.

  Gathering all the mental strength that I had at my command, I shot to my feet, stabbing a finger at the door. "Get out!" I shouted. Though I tried to sound as threatening as possible, I actually sounded frightened.

  Tyler didn't budge, his eyes still twinkling, unfazed by my barely-there wrath. "You sure about that?"

  “I’m positive!” I hissed, trembling all over. "You're a cheating scumbag and you don’t deserve me!”

  Tyler's grin evaporated and he looked at me with surprising anger. "I never cheated on you," he growled. "I swear on my life."

  “You may not have, because I happened to catch you, but you were about to!”

  "What you saw was one moment," Tyler said calmly. "You have no idea what happened before that."

  Why am I even listening to this? I wondered.

  "Will you calm down and let me explain without freaking out?" Tyler pleaded, a gentle tone in his voice that made me feel like mush inside. "I promise you’ll understand better once I'm done. And if you still don't want to talk to me when it's over, I'll leave and you'll never have to hear from me again."