by Lynn Graeme
“It’s not that bad,” Terris said defensively.
Jamal shook his head. He didn’t tell her about the disordered apartment he shared with other agents, always in a world of chaos as they alternated between cleaning their weapons, watching TV, and fucking the frustration out of their systems during what little downtime they had.
Neither did he tell her about the hovel he’d considered his home as a boy, where sanctuary was a fairy-tale word that had no basis in reality. Where his father had beat the crap out of him and his brother for years until his brother ran away to get fucked up on drugs, leaving Jamal to take the brunt of his father’s rage and violence.
He’d inherited a lot of his things from his old man. His hair. His skin. His temper. His propensity to charge into the fray and lash out with fists and claws.
He didn’t care if his soul was as black as his father’s. He only wished it wasn’t too black for Terris.
She watched him now, a concerned furrow between her brows. Jamal wiped his expression clean and chucked her on the chin.
“I expected a lot more color,” he said lightly.
She relaxed. “Each room has a theme. There are a lot more reds and purples in the bedroom.”
“Let’s go, then.” He grabbed her hand.
“Whoa, cat,” she laughed as he tugged her in search of the promised land. “You need to take your medication and rest. There’s only so long you can keep going.”
“Speak for yourself. I’m not letting you loose until sun-up. That’s sun-up two days from now.”
He found her bedroom. Ah, yes. Much better. The warmer colors suited her. She’d look exquisite spread out naked on those wine-red sheets, her silver-gold hair fanning out like a halo, rosy skin turning fiery with each lick.
Terris was amused. “Is sex all you think about?”
“Only sex with you. I like to dwell on the multiple aspects of it. The different ways to keep you wet and gushing.” His grin turned predatory. “Have to keep you interested, don’t I? You’re not after me for my charming personality.”
“What makes you think that?”
Jamal stared at her, swallowing before glancing away.
He felt her fingers skim his shoulder. “It’s the whole of you, Jamal. Not the bits and pieces, or the parts of you that you want me to see.”
He didn’t want to think about his past or their differences. He didn’t want to worry about how he could possibly hold on to her. He didn’t want to engage in heavy conversation or scoop out his heart when he was only just beginning to realize that he possessed one.
So he did the only thing he could do. He whirled around and tossed Terris onto the bed.
She squealed and bounced on the mattress, her dress flying up to her waist.
Damn. Jamal nearly fell to his knees, whether in penance or to give thanks he couldn’t say. His little Valkyrie wore buttercup-yellow lace. Terris sat up and started to push her dress down, but Jamal pounced on her and hiked it back up again.
He was awkward and ungainly and clumsy as he tried to strip her one-handed. Terris giggled as he cursed loud and profusely, batting away her hands as he tried to tear off her clothes and grope her at the same time.
“Stop, stop,” she was laughing, tears in her eyes. “You’re ridiculous.”
“I’m desperate, is what I am.” Jamal roared with frustration and reached to tear off his shirt, but Terris grabbed him before he could move.
“Hush,” she told him. “Sometimes you gotta let a girl do all the work.”
A gentle push made Jamal sit back on the bed to enjoy the show. And what a show it was.
She unzipped her dress and slid the sleeves off her shoulders, slyly peeking up at him from beneath veiled lashes to watch his reaction. Her bra matched her panties—of course they did. She bent over the bed and made a big show of carefully folding her dress, but then Jamal grabbed her leg and dragged her back to him.
She squealed and giggled some more, sounding so young and carefree. His hungry gaze ate her up, following each delicious curve, each indentation and every slick demanding part of her. The air was heavy with her intimate perfume. He traced the line of her hips, first with his eyes and then with his fingers. She looked shy and self-conscious when he palmed her thigh, right above the taupe line.
“You’ve let me see and touch before,” he reminded her gently.
She looked embarrassed, then pushed him back and sat up. “It’s your turn. Fair’s fair. I showed you mine.”
He could’ve undressed himself, but it was far more exciting to let her do it for him. She showed less care about taking off and folding his clothes, instead flinging them across the room with flourish. He enjoyed every minute of it. Just as he enjoyed the way she sucked in her breath as she stared down at his cock. Her hand slid down his chest, making a beeline toward her prize.
Then she stopped.
Jamal growled. “Keep going.”
She shook her head and leaned back, coyly tugging at her panties. “If you take your painkillers, I’ll give you a very special present.”
“You’re my special present.” He pushed down her bra, exposing a pink-flushed nipple. He fondled her breast and she gasped.
He bore her down to the bed, planting her flat on her back as he wrestled her in his efforts to remove her bra. It joined the rest of his clothes somewhere around the room, but before he could swoop in she pressed her hand to his chest and stopped his onslaught.
“I meant,” she panted, “a special present.”
She reached down and stroked him, long and hard.
Ah.
Jamal’s nostrils flared. His breath rushed out through clenched teeth.
Then he narrowed his eyes and stared down at his conniving vixen. Her teasing red smile taunted him again.
Well, then.
He palmed her breast, savoring the soft hitch in Terris’s breath. Keeping his hand on her, he used his right elbow for balance and spread her legs with his knees. He pressed his hard thigh into her deliciously wet core, her desire soaking through her panties as she panted.
He let her hang in the balance for a few more heartbeats—always best to keep a woman on the edge—then he stroked her rosy, tightening nipple, rubbing and pinching it by turns. She gave a most gratifying shiver. When she succumbed to a moan, Jamal bent down and sucked that nipple into his mouth.
Her cry was sharp and unladylike, and damn did it feel good.
Terris’s nails dug into his shoulders, a sharp, delicious bite that made the taste even sweeter. Jamal released her nipple and traced his tongue along a leisurely path from breast to collarbone to neck. The journey ended with a sharp nip on her jaw. Satisfied, he squeezed her ass cheek and patted it in approval.
“I’m ready for my present now.”
It took several moments before Terris’s breathing calmed and the haziness faded from her eyes. Blinking, she dragged her hands away from where they’d been clutching his shoulders.
Jamal rose from the bed and strolled over to his jeans, where the bottle of painkillers had been shoved into its pocket. He made a show of tucking a couple of pills into his mouth and swallowing for her.
Terris sat up, spring-blue eyes glinting with determination. “You’ll pay for that.”
“Baby, I’m looking forward to it.” He returned to the bed and popped her in the ass again, just for good measure. Slightly harder this time. He grinned at the beautiful sound it made.
She tackled him to the bed, rolling him beneath her, him laughing all the while. Fuck, when had he ever laughed during sex?
She played with his nipples for a while, subjecting him to the same sensual torture he’d put her through. She explored his ribs and counted each and every one of his abdominal muscles, a bite and suck for each one.
The light nick of pain only made him harder. The wet suction of her mouth made him grab her by the hair.
Nip. Bite. Suck.
He bucked in anticipation as she traveled lower. “Fuck. Fuck. C�
�mon.”
“Shh.” She nuzzled his cock with near reverence. “I’m not done yet.”
“Dammit, Terris!”
Again, that damnably coy smile. She met his gaze. Then, without breaking eye contact, she puckered and pressed her too-red lips to the side of his cock. When she parted, Jamal could see the shape of her bright red kiss on his throbbing shaft.
He was buying her every fucking brand of lipstick in the world.
Terris hummed pensively, like an artist evaluating the worth of her own work. Then she lowered her head for another kiss. The kiss turned into a long, curling lick of her tongue. Up, down. Little tiny swirls. Then a quick lap at the wetness escaping from the head of his cock.
Jamal instinctively tightened his grip in her hair, then flinched, knowing he was being too rough. A lady didn’t appreciate being so crudely handled, even when she was giving her man a blowjob. Especially when she was giving her man a blowjob.
Then he forgot she was a lady at all when she took him deep into her mouth.
Jamal’s vision blurred. He swore low and long, furious to miss a single second of this beautiful sight. His own body kept getting in the way, unable to keep still, his chest rising and falling too fast as his lungs struggled for air, his abs and legs jerking helplessly as he clutched at the sheets.
Then Terris swallowed, and he slammed his head back into the bed with a gasp. His spine bowed. He couldn’t move. He wanted this moment to last and last and shit fuck there she went swallowing again—
She worked him with her mouth, sucking and pulling with lips and teeth and tongue before taking him right to the back of her throat. She pumped with her hand, quick and hard and tight before scraping her nails just enough to keep him from coming. Fuck whoever had taught her this. She knew how to go impossibly deep before releasing him with a wet pop into the cold air, rolling Jamal into an endless tumble of need before going in for shallow strokes again.
He growled with aggravated demand and frustration. He clamped his hand around the back of her neck and thrust up into her, unable to stop moving. He was fast approaching that slice of heaven and was heedless with need to get there.
She let him have his due—for the moment, anyway. Then she forced his hips back on the bed, pressing with both hands as she took him again. Sometimes she hummed in pleasure as he tugged her hair and snarled lewd threats of how rough his revenge on her would be. Sometimes she nipped at the skin just above the coarse curls surrounding his cock, making soft sounds of appreciation at the way his muscles tightened.
Mostly, she took him apart and sent him reeling with the pieces.
Fuck.
“Terris.” Jamal clutched at her shoulder, tugging hard. “Terris. Baby. I’m close.”
She paused in her magic to cast him a wicked smile. “I know.”
He slapped his thigh, panting. “On me, baby. Please. I want my sweet Valkyrie riding me.”
She paused in consideration. Then she rose and shimmied out of that buttercup-yellow lace. Jamal’s breath caught in his throat. He couldn’t tear his gaze away from those golden curls and the glimpse of heaven they hid. He could already scent how wet she was, how much her body craved his.
She crawled up and over him, knees spreading to hold him captive. She leaned forward and kissed him full on the mouth. Jamal could taste traces of his own musk.
Terris framed his face between her hands, her eyes soft and hesitant. Her voice, however, remained steady. “I love you.”
His heart swelled too large for his chest. Too large for this room, this world, to ever contain it. There was no way he could possibly protect it, not when it lay there so open and exposed a target for anyone to take down.
Please let me keep her.
“I love you more,” he said.
Her face glowed, beauty and joy encompassed. She kissed him again, and he tasted that joy, took it into his mouth, wonder blooming as he finally realized what it meant to be happy.
His hand flexed on her thigh, squeezing hard as Terris guided him into her body. For a frozen moment, Jamal wished he was whole again. Wished he had two hands instead of one, wished he could hold her close while guiding his own damn self into her. Wished he could pull her down for another kiss while thumbing her nipple at the same time. Wished he wasn’t so damn clumsy and imperfect and hopeless.
Then his gaze fell on the line along her thigh, and he knew he was being the self-centered idiot he usually was. He shook himself out of his wretched self-pity. If Terris could build a life and weave new dreams and—heaven and all eight levels of hell willing—take a chance on him, he could for damn sure do the same.
He could do no less by his Valkyrie.
He could look forward as long as he had her by his side.
And then Terris came down on top of him, sliding him home, and there was no more thinking left to be done.
Nothing had ever felt so good. She was heaven and earth and light itself. He wanted to stay like this forever in her tight, exquisite heat, but then Terris began moving and Jamal turned heedless with bliss.
Unable to bear it any longer, he propped himself up on his right elbow so that he could squeeze and fondle her breasts. He was not made for being a passive lover. He struggled up to a full sitting position, and Terris paused in her rhythm to help him.
“Sorry,” he muttered.
“Dork,” she whispered with affection.
He sucked her nipple hard in retribution, hooking his right arm around her waist to keep her in place. Now he could bite and touch and grope all he liked. Terris’s cries rose to the ceiling as she rode his cock faster and faster. Jamal thrust back in counterpoint, each snap of his hips making her bounce and jiggle.
Without thinking, he pulled her head back by the hair. Terris tightened on his cock, forcing a hiss out of him. Damn. His princess liked it rough. She emphasized the point by scoring her nails down his back.
“Please,” Terris begged in an endless litany. “Please, please, please… .”
Jamal curled his lips over his teeth in a carnal snarl. “Well. Since the lady asked so nicely.”
He released her hair and slid his hand down, swirling his fingers over her clit. Terris came apart with a broken cry. Jamal took brutal advantage, rolling her under him and pinning her down with his body. He hooked her leg over his right arm, uncaring about the ache in his cast, furiously working her with his hand and making her inner muscles contract even more tightly around his still-pistoning length.
His thrusts turned savage, ruthlessly pumping into her as she bucked and twisted mindlessly in his arms. Terris’s screams drowned out Jamal’s own roar as white-hot ecstasy drove him off that final edge. He sank his teeth into the curve of her neck, heedless of everything except the wild, fiery rapture that consumed him whole.
He came inside her, hot jets of release pulsing deep in time with Terris’s own spasms as she convulsed around him for the second time. Jamal continued pumping into her again and again, eliciting a wordless whimper with each jolt, until at last exhaustion and bliss dragged them both into the soothing darkness of oblivion.
*
Terris couldn’t tell what had woken her. Stirring, she tried to lift her head off her pillow but it required too much effort. She closed her eyes and lolled her head back, feeling the pull of sore, languid muscles that denoted all the signs of a woman well loved. Her bedroom was dark, but she could see via a sliver of moonlight streaming in through the window that her flushed skin bore reddened marks from her lover’s rough handling.
Her lips curved at the memory.
Jamal had been insatiable these last several days since she’d brought him home. He’d returned to his place only once to fetch a change of clothes and other necessities, but other than that he hadn’t left her side. She in turn had taken time off work.
And they’d lost themselves in each other.
Jamal was a passionate, generous lover. He was amazingly teasing and tender, even as he bent her over the couch to take her from behind.
He was everything she could want in a lover. In a mate.
Terris pressed her smile to his shoulder. Jamal grunted in slumber and tightened his hold around her waist. He’d wooed her that evening with gentle fingers, coarse words, and a very skilled tongue. They’d forgotten about dinner entirely. It was still uneaten out there in the dining room.
Poor man—no wonder he was exhausted.
His free arm lay flat by his side, and she checked that there was nothing amiss now that the bandage and cast had been removed. She knew that as a shifter he had enhanced healing abilities, but even so, Jamal had been very … vigorous in his lovemaking. She loved him, but she didn’t want him injuring himself in the process.
She loved him.
The knowledge swelled within Terris, overwhelming her senses, filling her heart full to bursting. She loved this man, every hard, wary, sweet, imperfect inch of him. She glowed warm from the way Jamal touched her, as if she were some precious treasure he was afraid of breaking. And then the next thing she knew, he’d toss her onto the bed and hold her down as he used her roughly, making her love every minute of it.
Terris only wished she could make him as happy as he made her.
Because she knew he wasn’t happy. Jamal was a Council agent. A warrior and a fighter, a shifter who expressed himself best out in the field with his claws and physical prowess. He wasn’t a man content to be trapped within four walls.
He’d called the Council to inform them of his decision to leave the BioSynth trials. Terris had let him make the call in private, but her heart had ached when she saw his expression afterward. He’d looked … bereft.
He’d tried to play it off when she went to comfort him. It had led to a rousing argument until finally he gave in and let her hold him. The cat could be damn stubborn at times.
“They’re disappointed,” he’d said, which Terris knew translated to mean his superiors grimly disapproved of his decision. “But they’ll assign me to an appropriate role once I return to active duty. They asked me to stop by HQ so they could run some evals and figure out where to assign me.”
Terris had been troubled. “What does ‘an appropriate role’ mean?”
