The thought of her with someone else brought on unfamiliar pains, unfamiliar emotions. But it would be wrong to try to get between them. He wouldn’t do it. For all he knew, Ainsley’s parents loved Tommy and were hoping for a happily ever after with him. He respected them too much to go where he wasn’t wanted.
Friendship was the best solution, even if it made his insides clench with regret and dismay.
“We should get back,” he said. “There’s still so much to do.”
“I, uh,” Ainsley began, “I have some other things I need to do.”
Feeling like an idiot for not considering that she had other things to do besides take care of him, he nodded, his smile tight. “I understand.” But knowing she would probably be with Tommy while he was boxing up his father’s stuff irked him. He was sure the man was perfectly nice, but the fact that Ainsley was choosing him over Brock made Brock dislike him. Intensely.
He had to let Ainsley go. Had to. He couldn’t let her into his head like this. If he did, it would affect him when he played football. That was something he could not allow.
He had enough on his mind. Tomorrow was his father’s funeral. That would be tough enough to get through without picturing Ainsley with another man.
At least he was certain she’d be coming to the funeral. That comforted him.
Pushing aside his feelings, he stood, then he reached out his hand in an offer to help her up. She seemed to hesitate, but then she placed her small hand in his. When his fingers closed around her hand, it was as if a bolt of electricity shot up his arm straight to his heart. So surprised by the feeling that he almost released her hand, he held on, helping her to her feet.
She stood in front of him, her eyes on him. He couldn’t read the emotion behind those baby blues, but, heaven help him, he wanted more than friendship from Ainsley Hunter.
The shock of energy Ainsley had felt when her hand had been encompassed by Brock’s had taken her by surprise. By the look on his face, she knew he felt it too. It was too bad she couldn’t let herself go, couldn’t let him kiss her. Too bad she was so afraid of giving her heart to him for fear of him leaving her again.
Wait. Was that what she thought? That he’d left her when he’d gone off to college? That he’d only returned to Rosebridge on rare occasions and had never come to see her? She’d been fourteen when he’d left. What did she expect? Maybe nothing. But perhaps she’d harbored a secret hope that he would come back one day, come back for her.
Well, he was here now. But she already knew that he would be going back to a life that didn’t include her. She couldn’t give in to what her heart was begging her to do. She had to stay strong, had to control herself until he left. Only a few more days and he would be gone. Gone for good.
Chapter Nine
The next morning, when Ainsley arrived at the funeral home for Dan Remington’s viewing, her mind was fully on Brock. This would be a tough day for him and she wanted to do everything within her power to ease his grief.
She walked into the room where the casket was on display, her eyes going right to Brock, who stood near the casket accepting condolences from the people who had come to pay their respects. His face was stoic as he greeted people, accepting hugs and well wishes.
Getting in line, Ainsley wanted nothing more than to hold him in her arms and take away the grief she was sure he was feeling. Before she knew it, she was standing in front of him. Without a second thought, she reached up to give him a hug, and he wrapped his arms around her. To her dismay, she heard him stifle a sob.
“I’m so sorry, Brock,” she murmured. “Your father was a good man and he was taken much too soon.”
His arms only tightened around her, and even though the circumstances were sad, she couldn’t deny how good it felt to be held securely in his arms.
Maybe rejecting his kiss had been a mistake.
Brock didn’t know what he would do without Ainsley. Having her there on one of the saddest days of his life meant everything to him, and despite his grief, holding her against him buoyed him up in a way that shocked him. It was like her energy was flowing right into him, filling him up, giving him the vitality he needed to go on.
He didn’t want that to end. Couldn’t let it end.
Getting his emotions under control, he let go of her and gazed at her a moment.
He had to have her in his life. Had to. No matter the cost. But he would have to work that out later.
“Thank you for coming,” he said.
She smiled, her sunniness breaking up the clouds that had been hanging over him all morning. “Of course.”
“Will you sit with me during the service?”
Her lips parted in surprise. “Yes.”
A sense of peace settled over him. “Thank you.”
She nodded, then walked over to a pair of women and began quietly talking with them. That’s when it hit him. Tommy hadn’t come with her. Should he have? Brock thought about it as he greeted the next person in line. There would be no reason for Tommy to stay away. Then again, maybe he had to work.
Trying not to read too much into it, Brock focused on the man in front of him.
As Ainsley listened to the beginning of the service, she was acutely aware of Brock sitting beside her. She’d been touched that he wanted her right next to him. Then again, most of the people who had come to the service were friends and acquaintances of Dan Remington, not necessarily friends of Brock’s. It was no wonder Brock had wanted her at his side.
On the other hand, she couldn’t forget that the row behind them was filled with several burly football players, teammates of Brock’s who had come to support him.
The fingers of Brock’s left hand intertwined with the fingers of her right. Softly inhaling at the unexpected touch, Ainsley forced herself to relax, then she gently squeezed his hand to let him know she was there for him. He lifted her hand and rested it on his muscled thigh, then he covered their clasped hands with his other hand.
Loving the feel of him so close to her, she had to resist the urge to lay her head against his shoulder. This was not the time or the place for such an action. Instead, she savored the feel of her hand in his as she listened to the service.
Her hand fit in his perfectly, more perfectly than any other woman’s ever had. And knowing she was there, that she’d cared about his father, comforted him in a powerful way. The dozens of people who were there to support him, to grieve with him, meant so much to him, but if Ainsley had been the only one to come, that would have been enough for him.
In the few days they’d spent together, getting reacquainted, he’d come to treasure her sweet personality, the way she was so willing to help him. The fact that she’d known him before he’d become rich and famous, that she’d been part of his childhood and that she accepted him for him was huge. She didn’t care if he broke down in front of her. She was just so…genuine. And to top it all off, she was the most beautiful woman he’d ever met. And he’d met lots of beautiful women. Maybe her smile had something to do with it, the way it lit up a room, made him want to bask in the beams of light coming from within her. He wanted that sunshine in his life every day.
Stealing a glance at her profile, he knew he was falling for her and falling hard. But he would have to hold back. She was with Tommy and he had to respect that, no matter how much it pained him.
The service ended and they stood to file out, ready to drive to the gravesite for their final farewell.
“I’d like you to ride in my car,” he said. “To the gravesite.” He hadn’t let go of her hand, and he had no intention of letting go.
“I’d be honored.” She smiled at him and he battled the urge to kiss her, but he wouldn’t do it as long as she wasn’t available. Holding her hand was the most he would do, and today of all days, he needed that contact.
Ainsley was beyond pleased that Brock had leaned on her so heavily, that he’d invited her to ride with him to the gravesite. Obviously she meant a lot to him. That knowledge only d
eepened her attraction to him. And now that Tommy was out of the picture, it was as if her heart had opened up to Brock all the more.
Even if he was leaving in a few days, maybe it was worth the risk to kiss him, to let him know how she felt. Maybe things could work between them. Maybe she shouldn’t compare herself to the women that surely threw themselves at him all the time. Then again, maybe she was just a comfortable old friend, someone who was convenient to turn to at a time when he needed a friend.
Mentally shaking her head as Brock helped her into his car, she told herself to stop overanalyzing and to just go with it. Without risk, there would be no reward. She would have to remember that the next time she was alone with him.
After the graveside service, they drove to a reception hall where Brock had arranged a catered meal for friends and family so that they would have a chance to chat and catch-up. Walking inside, Ainsley was pleased when Brock kept her hand in his, and as they approached his teammates, she was excited to meet them. It was funny. Over the years that she’d watched Brock play with the Vipers, she’d also watched these men, so she almost felt like she knew them.
“Josh,” Brock said as he strode toward the Vipers’ star quarterback, “I’d like you to meet Ainsley Hunter.” Then he smiled at Ainsley. “This is Josh.”
Ainsley shook his hand, kind of star-struck. “Nice to meet you.” He was just as handsome in person as he was on TV. Not as handsome as Brock, but still nice to look at.
“Where did Shay go?” Brock asked Josh. Then a pretty woman walked up to them and Josh put his arm around her. “Hey, Shay,” Brock said. “Thank you so much for coming.”
Shay stepped forward and gave Brock a hug. “Of course.” Then she moved back to Josh’s side.
“Ainsley, this is Josh’s girlfriend, Shay Campbell.”
“Hi,” Ainsley said. “It’s good to meet you.” She couldn’t miss the adoration Shay and Josh seemed to have for each other. Envious that they’d found each other, when she felt Brock’s hand in hers, she reminded herself that she should never give up hope, even if a future with him seemed unlikely.
“This is Hank Parson,” Brock said.
Ainsley shook the running back’s hand. Like the other players, he was built, but not quite as tall as either Josh or Brock, probably just reaching six feet tall. But he was quick. Ainsley knew that because she’d seen him in action on the field. On TV at least. And she couldn’t help but notice his striking green eyes.
“Nice to meet you, Ainsley,” he said.
She smiled. “Same here.”
“And finally,” Brock said with a grin, “this is Jax Cordova. One of the best pass-rushers around.”
He shook Ainsley’s hand. He was even bigger than Brock—maybe six five.
Next to these guys she felt like a hobbit, but she could see how much it meant to Brock that they’d come to his father’s funeral.
They all sat around a large round table, and Ainsley enjoyed listening to the men joke and share stories, thrilled to be included in this illustrious group.
Chapter Ten
Ainsley leaned her head against the back of Brock’s couch and let her eyes slide closed. They had just gotten back to his house after leaving the luncheon, and she was exhausted. She could only imagine how he felt.
After the luncheon, Brock’s teammates had headed to the airport, but Brock hadn’t given any indication that he wanted her to leave him, so when they’d reached their neighborhood, she’d come inside his house with him.
Opening her eyes, she turned to face him and saw that he’d closed his eyes as well. Then she heard him softly snoring. Less than a foot of space separated them. Watching him, her heart contracted with love. Yes, love. Though she hadn’t seen him for years before he’d come back to town earlier that week, she’d always been attracted to him, and after seeing him at his most vulnerable, she’d come to realize just how deep her feelings for him went.
She was nowhere near ready to admit to the depths of her feelings for him, but she knew how she felt, and the knowledge made her smile. Until she thought about him leaving, as he was going to do. He’d told her he was flying back to Sacramento on Sunday night—four days away. The thought of him leaving made her desperately sad, but there was nothing she could do about it.
Holding back a frown, she comforted herself with the memory of him holding her hand all that day—first at the funeral service, then at the graveside service, and finally at the luncheon. She’d never pulled her hand out of his. She’d been putting off telling him that she’d ended things with Tommy, but now, as she gazed at him, she wanted him to know. Even if it would scare him away from mere friendship, she had to take the chance.
On impulse, she slid her hand into his. His eyes snapped open and he turned to her with a smile.
“Sorry,” she said with a grin. “I didn’t mean to wake you.”
His lips curved upward. “I don’t mind waking when it’s your face I see.”
Now that she’d acknowledged to herself how truly deep her feelings for him ran, she gazed at him, her heart surging with longing.
“What are you thinking about?” he asked in a quiet voice, his head still leaning against the back of the couch.
That I love you. Not ready to admit her newly discovered secret, she said, “That I’m going to miss you when you go back to Sacramento.”
He didn’t speak for a moment as he kept his gaze steady on her. “I’ll miss you too.”
Would he really? His life had to be crazy-busy with practices and games and parties and…other women. Holding back a frown, she nodded. “We’ll have to keep in touch.”
He straightened, his head coming off the back of the couch as he turned to her. “I’d like that, but…” His lips pinched together.
Worried where he was going with his thoughts, Ainsley asked, “What?”
“Tommy may not approve.”
Knowing that would no longer be an issue, Ainsley let a huge smile burst forth.
That wasn’t the reaction Brock had expected. He wanted nothing more than to keep in touch with her, but if she and Tommy were serious, it might not be such a good idea. So why was she smiling like that?
“What’s going on?” he asked, hope threading through him.
Her smile only grew brighter. “I broke up with him. Yesterday.”
What?! This was the best news she could have given him. Especially after such an emotionally draining day.
Then a new thought occurred to him. Why had she broken up with Tommy? Certain it had something to do with him, Brock wondered what her expectations were, and could he fulfill those expectations?
“I hope you didn’t do it because of me.” He immediately regretted saying the comment. How egotistical did he sound? Her smile immediately vanished and he wished he could suck the words back in.
She frowned. “I thought you’d be happy.”
He was happy. He was ecstatic. But that ecstasy was tinged with caution. Did she think he was looking for a long-term relationship? Was he looking for a long-term relationship? He didn’t know. He was too tired to think clearly.
“I am happy,” he said, desperate to put the smile back on her face.
“You don’t seem happy.”
Softly sighing, he said, “I’m just tired.”
Her shoulders sagged. “Of course you are. I’m sorry, Brock. Today isn’t about me.”
Could she be more selfless? The way she always seemed to think about him only made him feel worse about the way he always thought of himself. He had to fix this. Right now.
Shifting so that he faced her fully, he took her hands in his. “You have no idea how happy I am to know that you’re single, Ainsley.”
And now that she was, he didn’t have to hold back any longer.
“Really?” Ainsley’s voice was tinged with a mixture of disbelief and hope. If he was really happy, why had he said he hoped she hadn’t done it because of him? Technically, she’d been thinking about breaking things off with Tomm
y for a couple of weeks, but seeing Brock again had been the impetus she’d needed to move forward.
“Yes, Really. And do you know why?”
Shaking her head, she said, “No.”
A smile slowly spread across his face. “Because then I can do this.” One of his hands slid behind her neck, holding her in place, and a moment later his lips were moving toward hers.
Pulse racing, Ainsley held very still, her eyes locked on his as the moment she’d desperately hoped for, yet had been deathly afraid of, came closer to reality. Those soulful brown eyes bored into her, and with the fresh knowledge that she was in love with him, she forced out all of her fears as she lost herself in the feel of his mouth on hers, the taste of him, the feel of his warm body surrounding her, holding her close.
The kaleidoscope of emotions nearly overwhelmed her, but with his arms enfolding her, she let his powerful presence anchor her, and she sank against him.
The feel of her in his arms, the taste of her lips, they were better than Brock could have imagined. And he had been imagining them. Ever since the moment he’d found her on his doorstep. He admitted it to himself now. He’d wanted her from the moment he’d seen her and realized she was the same Ainsley Hunter he’d known in his youth, all grown up—stunning, smart, compassionate. Perfect.
His lips devoured hers, and when she melted against him, he knew her attraction to him was as strong as his was to her. Savoring everything about her, he let his lips linger on hers for several more moments before finally pulling away, his eyes on hers, his hand still curled around her neck.
As they gazed at each other, her face lit with a smile that brightened his day like nothing else could. This was the best end to this emotionally draining day that he could have imagined, and he was sure his father was smiling down on them.
“For the record,” Ainsley said, still smiling, “I didn’t break up with Tommy because of you. It was something I’d been thinking about doing for a while.” Then her lips twisted into a frown. “Although I don’t think Tommy believes that.”
False Start (Fair Catch Series, Book Two) Page 5
