by Sophie Stern
One lifetime just isn’t going to be enough.
“You’re so pretty,” I murmur, and she licks her lips. She doesn’t open her eyes, though. She keeps them tightly closed. Her hands are balled into fists, though. She’s still tense. She’s still nervous.
“Thank you, sir,” she whispers, and I smile.
“Ah, so you do have some manners,” I tease her, and a slow smile spreads on her lips.
“I try my best, sir.”
“That’s all I’ll ever ask you for, June.”
I kiss her then, and her arms wrap around me, pulling me closer. I don’t think I’ll ever get tired of her. I know I’ll never get tired of her. Much too soon, I pull away, and her eyes flutter open.
“Close them, darling,” I tell her. She obeys instantly, and I quickly strip out of my own clothes, careful to set my pants aside so my phones don’t slide out of the pockets. I have my normal phone with me: the one that’s a part of my cover. I also have a second burner phone that’s for work. Only a select number of people have it and I shouldn’t be away from that phone, well, ever, but I always leave it in my car to play at Anchored. Being near June is too much to resist. I tried for awhile, but I can’t.
I need her.
I place my hands on her hips. Her body stills; her breathing quickens. She stays silent, and for a moment, I just look at her. The lights are low, but I can see all of her. June is curvy and sweet.
“You look good enough to eat, darling,” I murmur. “But I’m going to finish undressing you now.”
“I’d like that.”
I run my hands down the outside of her legs until I reach her feet. Then I slide her shoes off one at a time and set them gently by the closet. When I return, I rub her thighs for a moment before unbuttoning her jeans and sliding them off of her body. I toss them aside and then come back for her panties.
“You’re wet,” I murmur, running my finger over the front of the black fabric.
“That’s your fault,” she says, and I laugh.
“Oh, I suspected you were a bratty sub, but I really had no idea, did I?”
“I’m more than just a sub,” she says quietly, and I realize she wants to talk about the fact that she doesn’t fit into a box. Of course she doesn’t. June is a switch, through-and-through, and if we’re going to pursue a relationship, she’s going to have needs I can’t fulfill for her.
“I know that,” I tell her. “Tell me how this played out in your other relationships.”
“I suppose it didn’t,” she says. “Not really. I’ve been with men before, but anytime I brought up me dominating them or even getting a sub of my own, the relationship sort of fizzled.”
“I’m not going to lie to you, June, but I most likely will never be comfortable with the idea of you dominating me in bed.”
“I understand,” she says, and she sounds resigned.
“But if you want a sub of your own for us to play with together, or for you to play with on your own, that’s fine with me.”
Her eyes pop open, and she smiles. She looks like a little kid who just got a puppy on Christmas morning.
“Really?”
“Really.”
“You’d do that?”
“Monogamy isn’t that important to me, honey. I’ll stay faithful to you, June, if that’s what you want, but if you want us to play with other people, we can discuss that all later. We don’t have to decide anything right now.” I move my right hand up to her breast and cup it, playfully bouncing it softly.
“Oh,” she closes her eyes again and moans.
“Besides,” I tell her. “These breasts are so pretty. I’d love to see a pretty submissive sucking on them and playing with them for you.”
“You’d like that?” She whispers, groaning.
“Oh, very much, June.” I move my left hand and cup her other breast, bouncing this one, too. “I’d love to see somebody worshipping your body just as I’m about to.”
“Ryder,” she whispers, and her eyelids flutter, but she doesn’t move. She just stays still as I touch her, as I play with her, as I fall just a little more in love with her.
Chapter 9
June
His hands shouldn’t feel this good on me, but they do.
I shouldn’t feel as comfortable with his touch, yet somehow, it’s like Ryder and I were made to do this. Usually, when I’m with a new partner, we set boundaries and ground rules and make plans for how things are going to work, but with Ryder, everything just feels so right.
With him, I feel like we can just make it up as we go, and it’s kind of a freeing feeling.
Knowing I’m safe with him makes this so much easier, so much smoother, and I close my eyes, melting back onto the bed. He moves his hands over my breasts, playing with them expertly. Every so often, he pinches one of my nipples. I bite my lip an try not to moan, but I’m too far gone for that.
Ryder kisses my collarbone and then moves to my breasts. He kisses one, sucking my nipple into his mouth. When he bites down, I reach for his hair and fist it, pulling him closer to me, pulling him into myself. Then he moves to the other breast and this time, I groan loudly.
“Yeah, baby,” he murmurs, biting my nipples and sucking, rubbing his face against me. “That’s what I want to hear, June. I want to hear you come apart for me, princess.” He licks the space between my breasts, back and forth, and then he starts to kiss lower.
“Ryder,” I murmur, but he keeps going. He kisses down the center of my belly and when he reaches the top of my black panties, I quietly clench my pussy, aching for him.
He’ so close.
Just a little bit lower and he’ll be there.
Just a little bit lower and he can slide his tongue across me.
I’ve been fantasizing about Ryder Hawke for so long now that I can’t quite believe this is actually happening. I can’t quite believe he’s here, in my room, in my bed. I can’t believe he’s about to fuck me.
In just a moment, his lips are going to slip even lower on my body. He’s going to pull my panties down and then he’s going to just look at me. Ryder Hawke is the kind of man who takes his time, and I know he’s going to want to see all of me.
And I want him to see me.
I’m not so young that I have any weird hang-ups about my body. It only makes sense that you leave those insecurities behind you at some point. If you don’t, after all, they’ll eventually consume you. So when Ryder looks at me, I’m not under the impression that he’s going to be picking apart any flaws I may or may not have. No, when he looks at me, it’s going to be because he is a man who can’t hold his passion back anymore.
I hold my breath, and I wait.
Only nothing happens.
Ryder doesn’t move. He doesn’t pull my panties down. He doesn’t do anything, and then, I feel him move away from my body.
“What?!” I practically screech. My eyes fly open and I sit up, staring at him. My breasts bounce with the quick movement, and his eyes drop to my chest.
“Excuse me?” His eyes narrow as they move back up to meet mine, and now I know that the game is in full swing. This how the type of Domination I like goes, and I’m glad to see that Ryder likes it, too.
Some couples can live the BDSM-life 24/7, but I’m not one of those girls. No, for me, I need my freedom, and not the kind that comes from submission. For me, I need to be able to make my own choices and not have to check in constantly. I need there to be a give-and-take in our relationship that’s almost completely even, at least until it comes to the bedroom.
And it’s here that I am all his.
It’s here that I will do anything for him.
It’s here that I will melt for him.
“I’m sorry, sir,” I whisper instantly.
“You know how this works, June,” he says, gripping my chin gently. He strokes my cheek, but his eyes are firm. “You say yellow and we slow down, June. You say red and we stop. You have an out. You have options. You can use them, but until y
ou say yellow or red, then we’re going to play my way. Understand?”
“Yes, sir,” I whisper, breathless. Oh, this is bad. I never play at the club, and while I’m well aware that my living quarters are different, it still feels like I’m playing at the club. It still feels like I’m mixing business with pleasure, and I shouldn’t be doing that. I should be resisting Ryder. Really, it would be in everyone’s best interests, but that’s not what I want.
No, tonight I just want to say yes.
For once, instead of being strong and resilient and tough, I want to be weak and melty and crazy. I want to fall into bed with Ryder Hawke and I don’t want to ever crawl back out. In this moment, I’m not worried about anything but listening to him, and this calms me incredibly.
“Now,” he says slowly. “I believe I owe you a spanking.”
I know better than to protest. Instead, I’m pliant as he moves to a sitting position on the bed and pulls me over his lap.
I love this position.
It makes me feel very vulnerable, but it also makes me feel protected. Isn’t that strange? Ryder Hawke has me half-naked over his lap, but somehow, I know that no matter what happens, he’s in control of this moment, and of me.
He runs his hands over my back and down to my bottom, and then he starts to massage me slowly.
“Now,” he says. “You know why you’re getting spanked, princess.”
“For lying to you,” I say with a sigh. I don’t pretend to have forgotten why he wanted to spank me. I told him there wasn’t a connection between us, that I didn’t feel some sort of intense, invisible connection.
I told him we were nothing, but that was a lie.
We both know it.
And now, the hour of reckoning has come. I escaped it for a little while, but now it’s time to pay the piper, so to speak.
“Ten spankings for lying,” he says gently, and then he starts swatting me. He spanks me over and over and each spank seems to sting a little bit more than the last. By the time he’s finished I’m sore and I’m sure my bottom is probably a bright pink by now.
When he’s done, he rubs me again, massaging my skin.
“Fucking sexy as hell,” he groans, and I feel his erection pressing into my belly. It’s nice to know that Ryder isn’t unaffected by what we’re doing because I know I’m certainly not. Then he slides his hand between my legs, and now Ryder knows I’m not unaffected, either. I’m very, very affected, in fact.
“I’m so wet for you, baby,” I purr, wiggling against his hand. Ryder strokes me softly over the fabric of my panties, edging me closer and closer. I usually orgasm pretty quickly, but this is super fast, even for me. The more he touches me, the more my entire mind clears except for one thing.
The need filling my core completely takes over my mind, and I grind harder against Ryder’s hand. I’m still on my stomach across his lap, but right now, I don’t even care about how exposed I am. Suddenly, I can’t focus on anything except coming. I can’t focus on anything except the fact that I am so, so close. Just a little bit more and then I’ll explode.
Just a little bit more, and then I’m going to come for Ryder.
He pushes my panties aside and slides one finger inside of me. Then a second finger joins, stretching me. I feel so full now, and I thrust my hips back, pushing deeper onto his fingers.
“You’re so fucking wet, June,” he growls. “My hand is fucking soaked, baby, and it feels so damn good. Your pussy is so tight, June. Do you have any idea what that fucking does to me, baby?”
I try to say something back, try to tell him how much this is turning me on, but the sound that escapes my lips is feral. I’m so far gone, so close to the edge, that it only takes a few more flicks of Ryder’s finger to push me over that cliff, and then I fall.
I soar.
I cry out as the orgasm rushes over my body, pushing me toward the edge of oblivion. I’ve never felt anything this power, this strong, this fantastic before, and I know I’m screaming by the time I’m done coming.
When my mind clears, I’m in Ryder’s arms, and he’s smiling down at me like I’m the most beautiful thing he’s ever seen, like nothing else matters right now except the two of us.
Chapter 10
Ryder
June Gables is putty in my hands, and I don’t ever want to stop playing with her. Everything about this moment just feels right. The way she came apart in my arms is incredible. She came hard and fast and loudly, and now she’s letting me hold her, touch her, and I don’t ever want to let her go.
“Ryder,” she murmurs, and she reaches for me, kissing me. I hold her tightly, running my hands over her, and then I release her.
“All right, princess,” I tell her. “Where’s your rope?”
“Why do you think I have rope in here?” She asks quickly.
I raise an eyebrow.
“Just because my apartment is in the middle of a sex club doesn’t mean I just have rope lying around,” she says.
I just look at her.
Doms aren’t just big and bad and naughty. We don’t just walk around spanking bratty subs and making them cry our names. No, we’re more than that. We’re more dangerous than that.
We’re patient.
One of the first things I learned when I discovered BDSM was that taking care of a good sub requires an incredible, unimaginable amount of patience. No matter what I’m thinking or feeling, I must respond with patience and kindness because that is what is required of a good Dominant partner.
If a Dom loses his cool during a scene, a submissive could become seriously injured bondage and playing and kink: it’s all about having fun. Getting seriously hurt isn’t fun, which is why most serious players follow the motto of playing in a way that is safe, sane, and consensual.
An impatient Dom isn’t safe or sane.
What he does to the sub certainly won’t be consensual.
So it’s with quiet contentment that I watch June wiggle beneath my gaze. She doesn’t want to tell me where her bondage stuff is.
“Don’t tell me you’re suddenly shy,” I tease her.
“It’s just that…”
“What is it, June? What’s got you nervous?”
“I’ve never been tied up before,” she blurts out.
“What?” I laugh. “How is that possible, sweetie?”
“I’m always the one doing the tying,” she squeaks.
“So you know about bondage and how it works and how to do it safely. You’ve just never been the submissive partner in rope play. Am I understanding this right?”
“Yes, sir,” she whispers.
“June?”
“Yes?”
“Will you trust me to be your first?”
It’s asking a lot. If you’ve never been tied up before, giving up that control to another person can be completely terrifying. It can be overwhelming and horrifying, and this is why you need to make sure everyone is sober when BDSM happens. A tipsy Dom might not notice the signs that a submissive is struggling, while a tipsy submissive might not have the will or the ability to safeword when necessary.
“I trust you, Ryder,” June says quietly, and something in my heart melts. That last little ice, that last little bit of resolve, is melting away and I don’t think it’s ever going to come back.
Not now.
“Where’s your rope, sweetie?”
“In that basket.” She points to a basket high on a shelf, and I retrieve a length of rope and come back. I position Jean on her knees and begin to carefully bind her. I have her with her arms behind her back, her breasts jutted out.
June looks beautiful, and something tells me I’m going to remember this night for the rest of my life.
She’s silent throughout the entire bondage process. She closes her eyes and her breathing deepens as I work to tie her up. My hands move on their own, methodically tying knots and running the rope over her soft, curvy body.
I realize that tonight is about more than just making love to Ju
ne. Tonight is all about offering myself to her just as she’s offering herself to me. She’s so vulnerable right now as I move around her, tying her up, yet she’s not afraid. She trusts me, and as I work on tying her up, I find myself relaxing because I trust June, too. I trust her more than I’ve ever trusted anyone before.
This is why I know I have to tell her.
It’s a terrible idea.
I could lose my job over it or worse, but I can’t keep lying to her. I can’t keep pretending that I’m just some writer who moved to town to look for ideas. That’s not true. That’s not who I am. No, who I am is so much more and I really, really want June to see that. I want her to get to know the real me. I want her to discover all of my inside jokes and my favorite movies and all of the things I love and enjoy, and I want to find those things out about her, too.
“Perfect,” I murmur as I tie. June whispers something I can’t quite hear, but then I kiss her softly and her eyes flutter open.
“All done?” She asks gently.
“You look lovely,” I tell her, looking at my handiwork. June gives the ropes a careful tug, but she can’t seem to break free. Perfect. She’s exactly where I want her: bound and beautiful.
“I feel…warm,” she says, surprised.
“That’s normal,” I tell her. “Does anything feel uncomfortably tight or painful?”
She wiggles for a moment, and then she looks back up at me and shakes her head.
“No, I’m okay.”
“All right, love,” I tell her. “Then I think it’s time to play.”
June is on her knees, and I carefully move her forward so her cheek is resting on the bed and her ass is up in the air. I only tied her from the waist up, so the rest of her body is unbound and free. She’s got a round, lovely bottom and right now I have a perfect view.
Then June wiggles slightly.
“Like what you see?” She teases. I swat her playfully, and despite her recent orgasm, June groans and wiggles even more. I reach for her skin and begin to rub her: softly at first, and then more firmly.
“June,” I whisper, and I move forward to start rubbing myself against her. She lets out a hiss as I touch her. Yeah, my baby is ready for me. She’s soft and wet and as I rub against her, and then she manages to wiggle until her legs are slightly apart.
