“No. I didn’t lie. I would never lie about something that horrible.”
“What then?”
“After you’d given me the best blowjob in my entire two hundred and twenty years, I sensed where things were headed, Vanessa. The way you helped me, the way we talked afterwards. I hadn’t realized until then. I hadn’t considered your feelings.”
“And what are my feelings, Lane?”
“You need something I won’t be able to give you down the road, and I don’t want to hurt you.”
“That makes absolutely no sense.”
I sighed and ran my hand through my hair, then tugged on the long strands in frustration.
“Okay. Let’s say we fuck. Let’s say, we fuck each other until neither of us can walk or stand and all we can do is lie there wrapped in each other’s arms, basking in the glory of how close to heaven we came. And I’m sure it would be kick ass.” Especially after what I’d already experienced with her. “Then what?”
“I don’t understand you? What do you mean, ‘then what?’”
“What is it you want, Vanessa?”
“I don’t know, Lane. What is it that you want?”
When I didn’t answer—because deep down, she already knew what I wanted—she frowned and walked to the window. The blinds were up now that the sun had descended all the way. She stared out at the bridge. “I want all those things you whispered to me last night when we stood at the top of the tower,” she said, her voice soft and sexy yet so vulnerable. She was breaking my heart.
“If I give those things to you, it would only be temporary.”
“I know.” She turned to look at me. “I’m not looking for anything more.”
I knew that was a lie. I’d overheard too many conversations she’d had with Maggie. I knew exactly what she wanted. What she needed. But I wasn’t that man.
“We both know that’s not true.”
“I wish you had just walked on by my room without stopping last week when you heard me singing. Then I could go on with my life without the memory of what it was like to know the real you.” Her words spit out with razor sharp points that dug deep into my heart as she shoved past me toward the door.
I shook my head. I no longer expected to see her at the club, but I didn’t want to press her about it either. So I just let her go. It was all probably for the best.
Chapter Twenty-Eight
Vanessa
I sprinted down the hall to my room and shut the door, locking it, knowing that it was useless in a house full of vampires who could come and go in the blink of an eye through walls. And tap deep into your soul, shattering your heart into a million pieces. But it made me feel better to do it.
I’d keep my word and be at the club tonight. I’d sing with him, and that would be it. I’d keep my thoughts in check and not let his presence affect me.
I picked up the rhodonite from the center of the dresser where it sat among several other crystals and vials of herbs and potions. It was the most powerful stone I had. It had become mine the night of my ceremonial ritual when I became a full-fledged witch. Actually, it was more like it had bonded to me. The crystal had been passed down through generations, and was one of three that had once been one; separated long ago to prevent its magnificent power from becoming unassailable and falling into the wrong hands. Or so the legend went. The other two thirds were long lost or hidden by my great-great-great-great-grandmother. No one knew where they’d ended up.
I picked out several sticks of incense from the package; one of clary sage, one of peppermint, one of rosemary, and two of lavender, standing each in a hole of the nine-inch ashtray made to hold the incense, lighting each one. When the combination of all the scents filled the room, I picked up the rhodonite crystal. Holding the powerful pink stone against my chest above my heart, I closed my eyes and said a chant.
“Oh one of three, flow your energy into me.
Quieting mind. Calming heart.
Give one by one the power of three.
Focus on courage and confidence for a start.
Oh gift of one let it be done.”
I opened my eyes to see the crystal glowing; light illuminated between my closed fingers wrapped around the stone, sending warmth and energy through my veins. I chanted the spell three more times, and the light went out. I inhaled deeply as the scent of the herbs filled my lungs and infused me with calm and clarity. And a great feeling of faith in myself. I could do this.
I finished my hair and opened the door to the large walk-in closet to get the outfit I’d planned to wear tonight when I heard a soft knock at my door.
I opened it to find Maggie standing on the other side. She’d already changed her clothes for the evening. “Wow. You look amazing, Mags. I love the way the light-blue diamonds in your dress play against your eyes.” The white dress with tiny blue diamond shapes was short and frilly, trimmed with white lace at the bodice around the scoop neck, showing a slight hint of cleavage.
“You like?” she said, twirling around and exposing the back. Or lack thereof I should say.
“Wow. It’s stunning.” The entire back of the dress was opened all the way down to the top of her buttocks, like a sexy one-piece bathing suit.
“What are you wearing tonight?” She didn’t know I was going to sing, and I had no intention of telling her. Let her be surprised along with everyone else, Lane had said. Why ruin the surprise just because he was being a jerk?
“I thought I’d wear this. I held up a black leather dress I’d picked up just for tonight. It was sleeveless with a v-neck low enough to give someone a bit taller than me a peek at my breasts but not as much as I’d worn in the past. It had a large opening in the back, revealing most of my back. The skirt was super short in the front and hung down mid-calf in the back. Mags crooned a soft “Oooh,” when I showed her the spiderwebbed black tights and black leather ankle boots with thick, red, platform soles I was planning to wear. I’d swooped my hair up on one side, letting it fall over my other shoulder with a braid across the top and two tiny outer French braids on the side with the swoop.
“Wow, V. You’re going full-on rocker mode tonight. I bet Lane will swallow his tongue when he sees you.”
Up until a while ago, I’d hoped that things would go that way tonight, too. But Lane had made it clear that he wasn’t going to give in to any of the urges we both knew boiled inside of us.
“Yeah,” I said, hiding my sarcasm the best I could. I didn’t want to let her know what had happened with Lane, and I hoped that Gage had the good sense to keep quiet about what he’d seen yesterday. He’d given me a knowing smile this evening that had made me aware that he understood my embarrassment when he’d barged into Lane’s room, but still, I knew those guys talked about women all the time.
*****
Club Royal was packed, and I was beginning to have second thoughts about singing. Lane had said he would make a small announcement after their sixth number, right before their break, introducing me when it was time to come up. He’d said he would try not to embarrass me with a multitude of lavish praise, though he thought I deserved it. I hadn’t eaten dinner for fear of losing it right before I went on. I was sweating with anxiety and had to blot my face with a napkin several times. I almost threw up a shot of Grey Goose Lane had coaxed me into having right before the band had started. He’d sat with me the entire time before, which really only made things worse. But I didn’t want him to know how much he affected me so I pretended not to care.
I’d thought about casting a small spell on the entire audience so they wouldn’t remember anything they heard during my performance, but then I would never know whether what Lane said was true, or if Kyle and Lizzy had actually known what they were talking about. I had to believe that no matter how much of an asshole Lane could be, he wouldn’t do that to me.
The first two numbers the band played had Gage on lead vocals for the first song, and Cian for the second. I liked the way they switched it up all the time, having someon
e different sing. Toward the end of the sixth song, I thought I’d lose my mind. “What’s wrong with you?” Mags asked. “You’re not drinking or talking. Did something happen between you and Lane again?”
I looked at her. Hearing the end of the song approaching, I said, “Yeah, you might say that.”
The crowd erupted in applause, and Cian shouted, “Thank you!” into the microphone.
“It’s that time of the evening where we introduce the band. As some of you know, we like to switch things up a bit here at Club Royal. Tonight, we have Gage on bass, Elvis on drums, and Lane on piano.”
Then Lane leaned into his mic. “Cian’s on lead guitar tonight. And…we have a special treat for you!” I watched the other three guys in the band look over at him. Surprise clear on their faces. I wanted to run out of the club. Fast. What if they got mad because I was going to sing with them? It was too late, though. “I’d like to introduce one of our very own. The very talented, Vanessa Creamer!”
“What?” Mags said, staring at me with wide eyes and a huge grin. I couldn’t move.
One of our very own was what tugged at my heart and lured me out of the seat I suddenly seemed to be glued to.
I carefully made my way to the stage, repeating the chant silently in my head, and Lane met me at the steps, taking my hand as I walked up the stairs on shaky legs. “You’re going to be great,” he whispered close to my ear, and tingles shot down my neck. I glanced at the other three guys, and they all gave me a pleasant, welcoming smile.
Lane led me to the shiny, dark wooden piano bench and sat down next to me. He kept his promise and sat on the outside toward the audience. The baby grand was a new addition here in the club. It hadn’t been here last week, and I was once again in awe of the wealth of these guys. It was as if you could dream it or wish it, and say it out loud, they could make it happen. Lane adjusted the mic so that it was between us. “Just like in the studio, baby. Ready?”
I nodded, and he played the intro to the song. We sang together, neither of us missing a beat. He smiled at me several times throughout the number, giving me encouragement. I couldn’t look at the other three guys, but I imagined they were on board with it all since they were playing with us. I found out later that they’d been practicing the song with the changes Lane had made all week, but they didn’t know I was going to be singing with them. When we got to the part about sharing love, once again our eyes met, locking on each other’s. As the words sank in, I knew there’d been a reason for all of this. Lane and I were meant to sing this song together. Everything was perfect.
His body so close to mine, exuded sexual magnetism.
I was once again lost in the sexy world of Lane DeMarco.
The band took a short break after our number, and I went backstage with them for a short time. They didn’t usually go out and mingle during breaks, but they wanted to congratulate me on such a great performance.
“So, this is what you two have been up to all week?” Gage said, smiling.
“I had a hard time convincing her she was good enough, so we kept it on the down low,” Lane supplied.
“Well, sweetheart, you are awesome,” Cian confirmed. “And I’m glad you and Lane found something to do with all that pent-up energy besides bicker with each other.”
My eyes shot to Lane’s, then Gage’s, hoping he wouldn’t say anything about what he’d seen. Thankfully, he just grinned, and I had a newfound respect for the guy.
“Yeah, girl, you have something magic,” Elvis said. Then added, “Besides the witchy stuff.”
“Thanks. I’ll see you all after the show,” I said and started to walk away, shaking off the pain that had almost made a permanent dent in my shoulders from the stress of the performance. I was so relieved that it was over.
“V. You can sing with us anytime you want,” Lane said.
I nodded, but I had mixed feelings about that. I turned back around and headed out to sit with Mags, grinning with excitement, pride, and a lot of emotional turmoil running rampant in my head.
When I reached the table, Mags stood, arms open to embrace me. “Wow, V. Just wow. I had no idea you could sing like that. And you never told me. I should be hurt about that, but man, you killed it up there with Lane. I’m so freakin’ proud of you right now, I don’t have room for any bruised feelings.” She laughed.
“Thanks. I didn’t tell you because I didn’t decide to sing until just last night.”
“You were magnificent. Excuse me!” Mags waved her hand at one of the ladies balancing a tray on her hand. “A bottle of the house’s best champagne, please.”
“Right away,” the waitress said without even batting an eyelash.
I felt rather special and decided to sit back and enjoy the glory.
The band came on, and Lane took center stage, just him and the microphone. Cian played a few chords on the guitar, and I instantly recognized the song. Then Lane leaned in, grabbed the mic, and stared right at me as he sang Bad Company’s Feel Like Making Love. I couldn’t breathe as my heart fought with my lungs for space in my chest. Why was he doing this? Why was he acting as if he wanted me again? He was so confusing; it really made me want to hate him as the rampant desire he ignited at my core waged war with my mind.
Chapter Twenty-Nine
Lane
We’d pulled it off without anyone guessing what we’d planned. Vanessa had been magnificent. I was so proud of her. I couldn’t contain myself and needed to perform the Bad Company song that had been pounding in my head all week. The band hadn’t needed any prompting for it. The song was one we’d done many times before, and as soon as I said I Feel Like Making Love to Cian, he strummed the first chord. Gage and Elvis fell in, knowing exactly where I was headed, and I didn’t hide the fact that I wanted Vanessa as I focused on her throughout the entire song.
****
I couldn’t take my eyes off of Vanessa the rest of the night. She sat next to Maggie on the sofa in the main living area as we all sat around talking about her performance and how good she was. Her cheeks pinked several times, and I could tell how good it all made her feel. My balls twitched, and I wanted to grab her, take her upstairs to my room, and lavish kisses on her until she begged me to be inside of her.
I was beginning to have second—maybe even third—thoughts about not wanting to take her and just enjoy her for now, knowing what the future held. Or didn’t hold. Josh and Chelle had done it. They were making it work, for now. It was that for now part that really bothered me. Would Chelle eventually turn Josh? Or was it just that she hadn’t been a vampire long enough to realize how she was going to feel when he turned old and died, leaving her lonely and longing for his touch, for his smile. His love. Cian had been ready to do it with Magdalena. He knew exactly what it would be like, but then he’d been spared that agony when Jewels had slit her throat—actually doing Cian a favor if I thought about it that way. But Vanessa was a witch. Could witches even turn? I hadn’t had much experience with them in the past. I’d only been warned not to mess with them.
After several celebratory shots and a lot of congratulations from everyone, Vanessa walked outside and stood, watching the city lights from the balcony. I went out and stood next to her. The way the moonlight played against the gold and pink of her hair made her look rather angelic.
“I didn’t say it before, but you look beautiful tonight,” I said, wanting so much to take her in my arms and kiss the holy fuck out of her.
“Thank you.”
“And you know you sounded great.”
“So you’ve said, like fifty times.” She laughed.
“That’s a bit of an exaggeration. But whatever. You were.” I turned to face the bridge as my finger accidentally grazed her hand. My heart skipped a beat.
“I think it’s time for me to turn in,” she said, glancing at me as she walked away. My heart plummeted to my stomach as disappointment jumbled with lust.
“It’s still early. Only three.”
“I don’t have th
e stamina of a vampire to stay awake all night, especially since I have to work during the daytime.”
I watched her in the sexy black dress as she walked inside, bidding goodnight to everyone on her way out as she left the room and headed up to bed. I didn’t want that dress to go to waste. She must have worn it for me. I flashed to the hallway upstairs by her room and waited.
I watched her approach, her hand on her forehead. Then she looked up, and our eyes locked. She stopped and stood where she was in the hall. I stepped closer. She swallowed, and her tongue slipped out, skimming over her pink lips. “If you think I’m going to let you tease me again, you’re mistaken.” I didn’t blame her reluctance to let me near her again.
“I never meant to tease you, Vanessa.”
She shook her head and gazed down the hall toward her door then shoved her way past me to her room. I grabbed her arm.
“Let go, Lane. You don’t need to pretend to want me or try to assault me with your lips to persuade me anymore. You got what you wanted tonight. I sang with you.”
“Assault you? I never assaulted you. I kissed you.”
“Same thing.”
“I can’t believe you feel that way. Even after last night when you gave me the best goddamn blowjob I’ve ever had? You think my kisses were assaulting you?”
She frowned. “Before that. You made me think you wanted me. The blowjob was to help you. At least, that was what I believed at the time. Now I think you just tricked me into that so you could get your rocks off without actually having to touch me.”
This woman would be the death of me. “I don’t know if I’m dreaming or awake half the time when I’m around you, Vanessa. My mind is so fogged with thoughts of what I want to do to you, imagining you naked and in my arms, that I can’t catch my breath. You’re making me lose my mind.”
“You’re already a nut job, Lane. First, you want me. Then, you don’t. Then you want me again. I don’t know whether to kiss you or run from you.” Her body shook with rage. I still had one hand on her arm, and added the other to hold her, to try and control the shaking. I backed her up against the wall to help keep her steady. As my mouth lingered about an inch above hers, her tongue darted out to wet her lips. Desire ached in my chest and shot down to my balls. I couldn’t stand to have her this upset at me.
Rocked by a Vampire: Billionaire, Rock Stars, Vampires (Immortal Hearts of San Francisco Book 3) Page 13
