by Natale Ghent
An older woman handed out blankets. When she reached Caddy, she squeezed her shoulder and pushed a blanket into her arms. It was scratchy and smelled of cigarettes and mildew. Caddy thanked her and copied the others, folding the blanket into a small square to sit on. There was the clatter of tin on concrete as a bucket was placed in one corner of the room. A small bowl containing a slosh of soup was pushed into her hands. She looked at the man next to her. He was older—her father’s age, maybe. He motioned for her to pass the bowl along. After three or four bowls he indicated for her to stop.
Caddy cupped the bowl in her hands and raised it tentatively to her lips. The soup was thin and tepid, little more than a watery broth with a few chunks of carrot and onion thrown in. She sipped it slowly, despite her hunger, letting her gaze drift across the faces in the room. Most of them were older. In fact, all the Dreamers seemed to be around her father’s age except for the girl, Poe and herself. She wished she knew where Poe was. If he’d somehow managed to slip away then she would do the same the first chance she got. She’d have to keep an eye on the girl, make sure she wasn’t watching.
After everyone was settled, a man stepped into the candlelight. “I want to thank you all for being so organized,” he said. “These are emergency measures. You all know we’ve been preparing for something like this for a very long time. That time is upon us. No one is allowed to go out—not now. There’s a bucket in the corner of the room. Use it if you need to. I apologize for the rustic conditions. Please pass your bowls back when you’re finished and try to get some rest.”
Emergency measures? Caddy turned to the man next to her. He was staring into his empty bowl. He gave a faint smile once he realized she was looking at him, and collected her bowl from her hands. He passed them to the next person then arranged his blanket and lay down. The others did the same, and so did she, bunching the top of her blanket into a makeshift pillow. She used this chance to look around again for Poe. Against the far wall she saw what she thought to be his silhouette. She made a note of his position and reclined, eyes open. She would wait until the others were asleep then go to him. It wouldn’t be difficult to stay awake. Insomnia was no stranger to her, even in the best of times.
There was a general restlessness at first, and frequent trips to the bucket with mumbled apologies as people stepped over each other. Caddy lay motionless, staring into the candle flame as the heavy rhythm of sleep took over the room. Some snored lightly, a few moaned in their sleep, while others coughed against the damp. The floor was cold and her shoulder ached but she refused to roll over and face the dark. Her hands started to shake and she gripped the blanket, the smell of burnt toast coming on before the dark took her down into the Emptiness.
Caddy came to, confused and disoriented. She found her bearings, realized where she was, and was relieved to discover the Dreamers were still sleeping. Had anyone seen her go? She raised her head slightly. No one was looking back at her. Resting on the blanket, she subdued her hands and slowed her breathing. She needed to go to the bathroom, desperately, but couldn’t fathom using the bucket. Instead she flexed her calf muscles—careful not to kick the person sleeping at her feet—and thought about her father. Was he dead? Or sitting in some low-rent hotel room with a gun on his knee? And her mother—would Caddy ever know the truth about her? It was too much to bear—all of it. She stifled a sob in her blanket. Squeezing her eyes shut, she forced her mind clear. Opening them again she saw a figure stand. It was Poe.
He picked his way through the bodies, stopping several times to check his footing. At first Caddy thought he might be going to use the bucket, but then she traced his trajectory to the cellar door. He fumbled with the hasp, covering it with his hand to dampen the sound of the latch as it clicked. With a jerk, he popped the door open. Watery starlight spilled across the floor and receded as he slipped out, closing the door silently behind him.
Caddy rose and crept across the room, stopping to steady herself the way he had. At the door, she felt for the latch, covered it with her hand and opened it.
Caddy snuck up the stairs, peeking out like a groundhog to search the landscape. Outside, the air was crisp and clean. No trace of Poe. Or Company men. She stepped onto the grass and followed a narrow path that ribboned lazily along the length of the house toward a stand of trees brooding in the distance. Empty fields rambled on both sides of her, their hummocks and gullies a moonscape under the stars. She breathed in deeply. Exhaled the cellar damp from her lungs. It was such a relief to be in the fresh air, even if it was dangerous to be out alone. She would take the risk for another opportunity to speak with Poe. First, she had to pee.
A clump of milkweed provided privacy enough. Caddy squatted behind it. Zipping her pants up afterwards, she caught the bandage on her hand in the metal teeth, cursing softly. The bandage pulled away, so she decided to unravel it. Then she unravelled the other, too, rolling the gauze into a ball and stashing it between the sticky milkweed stalks. Her palms were spotted with scabs where the glass had pierced the skin. But she was alive. She was more than thankful for that.
Stuffing her hands in her jacket pockets, Caddy slunk along the path, searching the barren fields as she went. Why hadn’t they been planted? They should be thigh-high with green by now, she thought. And where was Poe? It was foolish to be wandering out in the night, chasing after him. She couldn’t go back to that musty dungeon of a cellar. Not yet. She would walk until she reached the trees, and maybe keep going until she found her way home. She turned to look at the house. A faint light glowed on the horizon behind it. Was that the city? It seemed so far away. She could run right now—it was the perfect chance—
A hand clapped down on her shoulder.
Caddy jumped and withered with relief when she saw it was Poe. Had he been watching her the whole time? His dark eyes glittered in the low light. He appeared so much taller than she remembered.
“I didn’t mean to scare you.”
“It’s okay. I’m just … tense.”
“We really shouldn’t be standing out in the open,” he said, turning and walking toward the trees.
She shadowed him, nearly stepping on his heels as they slipped into the woods. Poe found a wide tree stump and offered it to her. She sat on the edge of it.
He crouched next to her, and she was taken aback when he cupped her hands tenderly in his.
“Do they hurt?” he asked.
“No.” She was trying to be brave.
“They look like they hurt.”
“Yeah … I guess they do,” she admitted.
He smiled. It was the first time she’d ever seen him smile. It was disarming. She pulled her hands away.
“You should have left the bandages on,” he said.
“They were dirty … and getting in the way.”
“Yeah, I could see that.”
He stood and leaned against a tree, staring into the forest. She hoped he was searching for a way to explain things to her. After several minutes of silence it was clear she was going to have to start the conversation.
“I can’t believe you’re here,” she said. “Did they take you the way they took me?”
He folded his arms and studied her face with such intensity it made her look away. “I came on my own.”
“Oh.” She kicked nervously at the ground with the toe of her sneaker. “How long have you been involved with these people? I mean … the whole time at school … I never knew.”
“How could you have known? We never really talked.”
He had a point. She continued poking at the ground with her foot. “It’s not because I didn’t want to talk to you … I just didn’t know how.”
“I know,” he said, letting her off the hook.
“Do you believe what they’re saying about the Dark and our purpose here?”
“I don’t have to believe anything they say. I know it’s true.”
“So, you trust Hex?”
“Of course I trust her.”
He was so con
fident. It was comforting in a way, to know that he wasn’t confused by doubt. “How can you be sure?”
“Because I’ve seen the visions.”
Caddy was unable to mask her astonishment. “You’ve been to the Emptiness?”
“The place of lost souls? Yes. Once … but only fleetingly, like the others. We’ve all heard the stories, though, of the ones who’ve gone much, much deeper.”
He was referring to her. It made her feel exposed. She clenched her hands, hoping they wouldn’t shake. “And now you believe the world is going to end and nobody has a clue except us.”
“It’s not that simple, Cadence. These forces have been in play for a very long time. I know it’s hard to take in all at once.”
He’d called her Cadence. Only her father ever called her that. She was amazed he even knew her proper name—and more than a just little confused that he appeared fine so soon after losing his girlfriend. Meg had been killed by the Company men. Yet he seemed so calm about it all.
“What about Meg? Was she just a casualty of war?”
His mood darkened and she immediately regretted her words.
“People are going to die,” he said. “We have to accept that. It’s for the greater good.”
It sounded so cold, so matter-of-fact. “You honestly believe that?”
“Yes.”
“I’m sorry, but I think that’s crazy.”
“The world is on the edge of total destruction. That may be difficult for some people to comprehend.”
Some people? Did he mean her? “Maybe they don’t want to comprehend,” she said. “Maybe they want things to stay the way they are. I’m one of them. I don’t want anything to do with any of this. I want to go home.” Her eyes welled with tears, betraying her.
Poe shoved his hands in the pockets of his jeans. Caddy wiped away the tears, feeling remorseful for her anger. It wasn’t his fault the world was unraveling.
“I’m sorry. I’m just scared.”
Her candor had an effect on him. His voice softened. “It’s okay.”
“I’m just so messed up about it all,” she confessed. “I can’t believe there are Company men out there killing innocent people. Why would they do such a thing?”
Poe looked away, and the night stretched out forever between them. When he spoke again, it was in a whisper. “It’s my fault Meg’s dead.”
“Your fault? How?”
Grief clouded his face. “I had no right … I should have never seen her in the first place. They told me the risks. I tried to break off with her but she refused …”
“You’re not the one that killed her, Poe.”
“They killed her because of me. The Company—it does whatever it can to get to you—to break you. If it can’t break you, it takes the ones you love. Meg didn’t know anything about any of this. I told her nothing. I thought it would protect her …”
The anguish in his voice was heartbreaking. Caddy understood his pain all too well. “My mother … Hex told me Company men killed her to get to my father. When that didn’t work, they killed him … at least, she thinks they did.”
“They killed my mother and father too,” Poe said.
His admission struck her like a fist. They’d hardly exchanged a word all those years in school, and now here they were, laying their souls bare to each other in the middle of nowhere. It made her feel closer to him, knowing he understood what she’d gone through. It made her reconsider if Hex had been telling the truth after all. Maybe her father was killed by Company men. What had her vision meant, then? Why had she seen him sitting on a bed in a hotel with a gun in his hand? Hex had said she suspected he might still be alive. Maybe he was. Maybe he’d missed when he pulled the trigger. This gave her the smallest feeling of hope. She vowed not to give up on her father. She vowed to uncover the absolute truth. As for Hex, she would remain cautious. She had no reason to trust her. Especially after their exchange in the barn. That part she’d keep to herself for now.
“I’m sorry about your parents,” she said.
“My father knew the dangers.”
“Did he try to hide the dreaming from you?”
“No. He prepared me from the time I was a child. He couldn’t keep secrets from me.”
For some reason she envied this. Her father had taught her to do things for herself, to solve problems, to be observant, aware, to question everything, to know things. He was adamant about it, pointing out trees and plants and animals anywhere he could, telling her the names. Showing her how to gather seeds, how to grow them. Teaching her how things worked—old knowledge. Every game was an opportunity to learn, even hide-and-seek. He’d scold her if she was found too easily. He never spoke openly of the dreaming or its purpose. He never talked about Company men and the dangers waiting for her out in the world.
“My father told me nothing.”
“Maybe he thought you’d come to it on your own,” Poe said. “Maybe he was waiting for you to figure out what you are.”
“And what am I?” she asked.
“You’re a Dreamer, Cadence. A very special one. I knew it from the first minute I saw you.”
The blood rushed to her face. Was that the reason why he was always looking at her in class? How could she have been so stupid, so self-absorbed? The whole time in school she’d thought that he liked her. And she’d allowed herself to like him too—more than she cared to admit. He wasn’t interested in her that way. He’d just been waiting for her to figure out that she was a Dreamer—like her father.
Talking to Poe, it was clear now that her father had tried to help her understand her visions—or simply deal with them. Her mother too. They were both so patient. She should have figured it out long ago. The visions weren’t about her. They were so much bigger than that. Poe must think her a snivelling child. Well, it was time for her to grow up and face the truth. She pulled her necklace from under her shirt and held up the green stone.
“It’s a piece of fluorite—for psychic protection. My father gave it to me.”
“So did mine.” Poe produced an identical necklace from inside his shirt.
Caddy stared at it in wonder. It was too fantastic a connection to be a coincidence. “Do you really think we can change things by dreaming?”
“Yes, if we work together.”
Caddy tucked her necklace back under her shirt. “It seems so futile. The Company men are murderers. How can dreaming stop them?”
“It’s the energy we’re trying to change. The murders, the intimidation, they shift the energy on the planet toward negativity, toward the Dark. It fills the world with fear and despair. It allows the Dark to take over and control our thoughts. If they control our thoughts, they control everything. We can counter that by dreaming the Light together, by pushing against the Dark as a unified force with our visions of hope for the future, like a million candles lighting the way. Our dreams have power, Cadence, but only when the many dream as one.”
He made it sound so easy. What good were ephemeral dreams of the future—even unified ones—against the reality of murder and torture?
“Hex’s eye …” she said.
Poe picked up a pebble and rolled it between his fingers. “The Company took it. The left eye is the conduit to our dreams. By taking her eye they stole her ability to connect to the collective, to dream.”
The idea of it made Caddy sick. “Why didn’t they just kill her?”
“It was a warning. They mutilated her, took the dreaming away, but let her keep her right eye so she can witness the end of days. She was one of our strongest links. They thought they could break us all if they got to her.”
“She’s so young …” Caddy lowered her head. “I can’t even imagine …”
“We’re stronger because of it,” Poe said. “When they broke Hex’s link they lost the ability to trace her. It was a tactical error. We’re safer as a result.”
“Did you know her before? When she could still dream?”
Poe pushed the pebble i
nto the earth. “No. She came to us after. She helped us organize. We had no real leadership before her. The Dreamers have always gathered in small groups and worked in secret to avoid detection. But the Company has grown too powerful. The men have depleted our numbers. Fractured us. Filled our hearts with fear. We heard stories of a woman—the daughter of a Dreamer—who’d started organizing, started gathering the Dreamers together. She’d discovered that the children of Dreamers could substitute for their parents. We heard she’d been tortured by the Company. That they’d taken her eye. This didn’t stop her. When she found us, we were scared and nearly broken. She gave us hope again.”
Caddy looked at the scabs on her hands. Her pain was nothing compared to Hex’s. “If something like that happened to me … I’m not sure I could be so strong.”
“You’d be surprised,” he said.
She shook her head. “I’m not like you.”
“We’re not so different, Cadence. I’ve just had more time to adapt. My father prepared me for the worst from the beginning. He wanted me to know the truth. The Company men—they pick up on our emotions. They use them against us, to track us down. They’ve been doing it for centuries.”
He was being so kind. She didn’t deserve it, really, not after the way she’d judged him. Still, she welcomed his patience. “Who are they?” She wanted to hear his version, to see how it compared to Hex’s.
Poe thought for a moment before he spoke. “They’re an organization dedicated to the destruction of the Light. Some say they’re connected to the one they worship, that they’re lower forms of demonic energy made manifest on earth. Others say they’re just people, willing to give everything for the cause they believe in.”
“Even at the expense of their own lives?”
“They consider it an honour to die for their master.”
“I’m not that dedicated,” Caddy said. “I don’t think I can do what Hex needs me to do.”
