by J. L. Brooks
I came out from the private changing room and twirled around for approval.
“Get a good look now because no one else is going to see this for a while.” I chimed while looking in the mirror while smoothing my hands down the sumptuous fabric. Hunter's head tilted a little before looking back into my eyes.
“What if I took you somewhere tonight where you could show it off?”
I turned and pursed my lips at the suggestion.
“Where could I possibly go that it would be acceptable to show this off in public? And no, I’m not doing a private show in your room.”
Hunter pushed himself away from the leather chair he was lounging in and moved towards me with grace. Sliding his fingers down the bodice, his fingers played with one of the laces draped over my hip.
“Lila, not my room, though we could always arrange something.”
I slapped him against his chest and looked back at my reflection in the mirror. Hunter dipped his head into the crook of my neck and placed a soft kiss.
“I think this place might help you with your dilemma. Since you write dirty books and all, give a little inspiration.”
Smiling mischievously at the proposition, I bounded back into the room to be unlaced and purchase my new wares. Although the price tags made me grimace, I couldn’t deny how sexy I felt in them. Hunter immediately stepped between the sales woman and I with his credit card and looked stern.
“This is a gift.”
As the clerk looked to me, I simply shrugged my shoulders and grabbed the bags. If he wanted to pay for my underwear, it wouldn’t be the first time.
I swung my bag in a wide, carefree motion, as we strolled down the Mile and enjoyed the warm weather. After a gorgeous day at the museum and lunch on the pier, I was ready for a nap. My yawns became more frequent and he finally caught the hint I was running low on steam.
“Okay, you want a nap. Good, because like I said earlier, tonight will require a lot of energy.”
I couldn’t imagine what he had in store but my senses were reeling. Being so close to him and acting so casually was wearing down my defenses, as if I had any. This morning I had already dreamt of what he could do, and every subtle movement confirmed it. I never wanted anyone as badly as I wanted Hunter Michaels and I felt like a feral animal, hungry and insatiable. The way his eyes scoured me in the small shop confirmed he felt the same way. I was no idiot to guess the intentions of a man who took you to buy hundred dollar panties.
As we approached the hotel and slipped into the elevator, I chanced the opportunity to grasp his hand and squeeze. Instantly his body relaxed and he gently squeezed back, as if I had provided some life affirming gesture. I giggled as we approached our shared room and I tossed the small bag on the bed before taking a shower. I needed the rest and would not bother to shave my legs later if I did not do it now. Taking the slow opportunity to tidy every area of my body, a small part of me anticipated he would be seeing me naked, that he would cross that line of good intentions. I was counting on it.
I slept deeply for the three hours I napped. Hunter was gently shaking my shoulders to prepare for the evening, yet I would have been perfectly content staying in bed.
“Get up Lila, it’s almost time to go.”
“Go where?” I grumbled while flipping onto my stomach.
“It’s special, I promise, now get up.”
Climbing off the bed with reluctance, I removed the items from the small black bag and took great care not to rip them as I pulled them over my feet and ankles. I needed assistance lacing up the bodice, in which Hunter was happy to oblige. My dress was light and fluid. Small spaghetti straps clung to the sheer fabric I dared to call a dress. Draping across my upper thigh, it moved back and forth daringly. He said to get something suggestive, and this screamed “fuck me”.
His eyes grazed my silhouette as I walked out of the bathroom and into the suite. Wrapping up in a black pashmina scarf, I appeared somewhat presentable leaving the hotel. Hunter walked purposefully beside me and with authority to buffer any unwanted advances, claiming virtual ownership to his property. This role was unfamiliar and exhilarating as well as degrading. I was so much more than arm candy, but no one knew that.
After slipping into the sleek town car, we traveled for what seemed to be an hour through the city and into a more industrial part of town. There were no vagrants or prostitutes on corners; we were quite distanced from the grid. A small box allowed the driver to punch a code, granting us access to the secured lot. There were rows of Audi’s, BMW’s and other high end automobiles. Hunter paused as the car came to a halt and handed me an elaborately decorated mask.
“You need to wear this. House rules.”
“House rules?” I questioned as my fingers ran across the soft interior. These were well crafted, not a chintzy dime store creation. He did not respond so I slipped the piece over my head and felt it conform to my face. Stepping out of the car, I walked up the path to the entrance resting my hand on Hunter's arm.
Loud music rattled the walls of the non descript brick building as two men with headsets stood outside of steel doors omnisciently holding what I presumed to be loaded guns.
Hunter walked confidently with me in hand and said one word. “Genesis”.
The men turned without question and opened the imposing steel doors. Inside, vibrant lights and pulsating bodies moved in rhythmic motions to the music pounding from the speakers. The building was quite large as I could assess from the outside, yet this was a fraction of the compound. After entering a series of corridors, the hall opened to a set of steps into a cavernous room. Moving to the bar near the dance floor, Hunter whispered to the bartender who promptly went into a back room and returned with a bottle of expensive vodka.
“Why isn’t it out for display? What kind of bar doesn’t have it ready to go?”
I was curious about the lack of glass bottles so common place to a normal establishment.
“This is a special bar Lila, they are BYOB. I had a bottle delivered earlier today.”
“Why are they BYOB? It’s not a strip club.”
I looked around at the fully clothed bodies on the dance floor. Nothing seemed out of place except the alcohol situation.
“I brought you here to watch Lila, it’s still early. Drink this and let’s sit down.”
I took the vodka and cranberry from his hands and sipped the sweet liquid slowly as we walked to a plush velvet booth. After a few drinks, I noticed people pair off and head down the various exit points off either side of the dance floor.
“Where are they going?” I asked.
“They are going to fuck.” Hunter said with no emotion.
“Are you serious? Where are we?”
“Lila, this is a Lifestyle club. People come here to swing.”
I shook my head not fully believing what he said.
“And you brought me here why?” I asked, pursing my lips inquisitively.
“Because I thought it would inspire you.”
“Inspire me how?”
“You need a story right? Write about what you see here tonight. There will be enough for you to write a hundred novels.”
His nonchalance was disturbing and my body froze at Hunter's attempt to rouse my muse. Although his intentions were creative, I questioned his motives.
“Do you want to fuck me?” I whispered near his ear.
His hands laced through my hair while staring into my eyes.
“Do you really have to ask?”
He seemed so certain and assured in the moment, whereas I was freaking the hell out.
“Where’s the bathroom?”
Hunter pointed to a small corner and loosened his grip. Moving swiftly, I pushed on the padded doors and leaned over the sink, ready to hurl. Only a few minutes passed before I heard her voice.
“Oh sugar, we’ve all been there. I can see this is your first time. You need to relax, it’s just sex. Ain’t nothing to get in a tizzy over. Let me help you.”
; I turned towards the velvet voiced angel and stared over her gorgeous porcelain skin and long blond hair that lay braided to one side. Wearing a tight black leather dress, she reached into a small golden trinket box and removed a pink tablet.
“What is that?”
The woman laughed knowing I wasn’t too naive.
“It’s exactly what you need right now sugar; it will make you right as rain I tell ya.”
“My mom always told me never to take anything from strangers.” I laughed.
She returned my smirk and reached out her hand.
“My name is Candy and I have the best. Besides, I like to help out when I can.”
I reached out for the pill and held it in my palm. Stamped on its surface was the imprint of an apple.
“How appropriate.” I whispered.
“Indeed.” Candy smiled as I studied the pill for a second before swallowing it with a few large gulps of water from the bathroom faucet.
“What do I owe you?” I asked the woman as I wiped the dampness from my chin.
With a slow stride, she stopped inches from my face.
“I got you sweetheart. You have yourself some fun ya hear?”
I nodded and thanked her before heading back to the booth, unsure of what I just ingested and partially not giving a flying fuck. I was in a sex club in the ghettos of Chicago with my ex-boyfriend and a stranger just gave me drugs, what else could possibly go wrong?
Within the hour familiar symptoms of days gone by appeared. First, my teeth began to grind, and then my scalp tingled with pleasure. The overwhelming restlessness could not keep me contained, so I excused myself to the dance floor and found a spot near the speakers where I could feel the sound reverberate off of my skin. The bass from the speakers pulsated in my bones and through my veins. I felt connected to the music in an unnatural way and it demanded my body to move with it.
Unknowing the state I was in, Hunter joined me for a moment and whispered in my ear.
“Want to take a tour? You haven’t seen anything yet.”
I nodded my head greedily, knowing I was ready for what he wanted. He led me through a maze of rooms. One held several hot tubs with writhing bodies, wet and demanding. Another, a series of showers, and lovers entwined. Each room occupied with flights of fancy, except one. In a lowly lit room laid a series of chairs against a wall. In the center was a plain king sized bed with white sheets. There were no pillows or blankets. Mirrors covered every inch of the room.
Hunter smiled darkly while leading me inside.
“Have you done this before?” I asked.
Part of me hoped he said no but I knew better. Surely someone so comfortable among such things had partaken in its pleasures.
“No Lila not yet.”
His answer warmed my body in the chilly warehouse. I could give him this. Something he had never had. Without prompting, I found my way to the bed and reached out my hand.
“Maybe it’s time?” I giggled.
Hunter looked unsure as the room began to fill with spectators. I paid no attention to any of them and kept my eyes on him. I knew in about five more minutes I would not have as much control, so it was now or never.
Pulling him closer, our mouths collided and I could taste the tartness of the cranberry on his tongue. Frantically I tried to remove my dress, yet Hunter grabbed my hands to still them.
“Are you sure Lila? Tell me to stop, I will. I won’t hurt you, not again.”
If not for the drugs, I would have coiled away from him, yet all I felt was carnal lust. Guilt and fear were two emotions forbidden to process, leaving nothing but submission.
“It’s okay if it hurts I’ve been a bad girl. I can take it.”
I giggled to keep him from thinking too hard about it. Tightening my thighs around his waist, I reached down with one hand and grazed my fingers against the bulge in his slacks. Over the music, I heard the faint hiss and the subsequent tightening of my other wrist.
He did not remove his clothes, only his pants dropped to his knees. He also did not undress me, only my panties were removed. For whatever reason he did not want us completely exposed, although we were hidden beneath masks. The only thing I could figure were his tattoos were too recognizable and he could not afford to be ousted.
Laying over me, the light was too low for him to see how dilated my pupils were. The warmth of my skin could be contributed to the moment, as well as the shaking. I could not see any of the spectators, although they were mere feet away. Nothing existed but him. He held his shaft in one hand while braced over me with the other. Lightly slapping against my clit, I raised my hips hungrily towards him. He was not out to tease, I could feel it in his hesitancy. He too refused to look anywhere else but down at me.
“It’s okay,” I mouthed.
My invitation was all he was waiting for. Gently sliding into me, I felt myself stretch painfully around him, the sensation flying through me like electricity. I gasped for air as he filled me completely. Resting for a moment against my body, he turned slightly and bit my shoulder. Even in this state, my body recognized the familiar intruder. He was stealing away my self-control, not the drug. For a brief time, I felt everything as I thought I should before I no longer held the reins. I knew I wanted him before taking the pill, it simply gave me the courage. Either way, there was no turning back. My head fell over the edge of the mattress and I opened my eyes to stone faced voyeurs. Whatever pleasure they derived from this scenario was absent from their expression. Tight lipped and frozen, I turned from the human statues and maneuvered my way over more. Hunter flipped me over onto my knees, where I could look at each face. I no longer felt the impact of him driving into me. I ceased to be a part of my own body. I caught the tilts of the heads and the whispers as my performance was being judged, and suddenly the feelings were no longer blissful, but became dark and haunting.
Never before had I felt this debased, never before had I felt this much pleasure. Hunter drew out of me a feeling unlike any other, and to his surprise, my orgasm made me scream. The room emptied quickly thereafter and only the woman from earlier remained. Walking up to us, her hand stroked my cheek.
“Right as rain. I knew you wouldn’t disappoint me.”
Hunter looked questioningly at the woman as I snaked around in the bed.
“What are you talking about?”
Candy laughed at Hunter's ignorance of the situation.
“She’s rolling her face off you lucky son of a bitch. I would ask for a turn but you are quite possessive I can tell.”
Hunter ripped off my mask and looked into my eyes.
“No, you can’t be. Why? Fuck, fuck, fuck.”
Candy then laughed at both of us as Hunter cradled me in his arms.
“What did you give her?”
“Some of my best shit. Mostly molly, a little smack. She’s good for a few more hours.”
Hunter looked devastated.
“Why do you look sad,” I giggled. “This is what you wanted right?”
He held me close as he raced out of the club. I laid in the car alone for a bit while he grabbed our things but it didn’t bother me. I sat mostly laughing, playing with the doors and other items in the car. He came back and held his head in his hands. I tried to soothe him by rubbing his shoulders but it did nothing.
“You’re going to hate me soon,” he whispered.
“I loved you, why would I hate you? You were the greatest thing that ever happened to me.”
His eyes filled with tears, as I remained chemically buoyant.
“In a few hours Lila, I am going to be the biggest piece of shit you have ever met. Nothing I do will make this right.”
Climbing into his lap, I grabbed his face and forced his eyes towards me.
“If you loved me, you will find away. Because I love you, so much my heart hurts. I know I am lost, but you came back to me, and it’s better now. I am not alone anymore.”
Hunter closed his eyes and salty rivulets poured down. Breathing ou
t deeply he pulled me close.
“I need you to come back to me too Lila.”
It was hours before I could finally sleep. By the time we had reached the hotel, the drug had peaked and I was coming down hard. Few words exchanged between us as he unlaced the delicate bodice and watched as it fell to the floor. The beautiful garment was no longer special and I wanted nothing to do with it. Hunter poured a bath and sat next to me as I sank into the soothing water. When the steaming water hit my swollen privates, I winced slightly in pain.
“Are you okay?” He asked quietly as his eyes grazed my body, stopping at the marks on my hips where his fingers bruised the soft skin.
“No not really.” I replied flatly.
There was no way to answer other than honestly. Reality was crashing down as I came to terms with how fucked up I really was. It had surpassed my poor decisions with my career and was now filtering into every aspect of life. If not for Hunter being brought into the thick, my prospects at happiness during this time were just as meek. There were fragments where I believed everything would be okay, yet I should have known better. Looking into the water ashamed, I felt small and worthless under his gaze.
“Why would you do that?” He asked angrily.
Raising my head to meet his stony eyes, I found it incredible he was so indignant about my behavior. Discovering his penchant for the swinging lifestyle did not exactly a give him a gavel to dictate a morally acceptable path in life.
“You trust those women enough to stick your dick in them, why not for drugs? You took me there to broaden my views, inspire me. Is that not true? How are my actions any different from yours? You chose to step outside of a boundary, so did I.”
Hunter pinched the bridge of his nose in frustration before rubbing his hands over his face. I knew he was holding back, although it wasn’t necessary. I was capable of enduring his sharp tongue. However, he remained detached, trying to make sense of it all.
