by J. L. Brooks
“I’m the only one that gets to mark you, or ride you bareback. I will be covered out there; I am just proving a point. Tonight you are mine.”
Once again I was surprised and conflicted by his actions. He didn’t have to set this up if he wanted me to himself. He said it takes a strong woman to be so vulnerable. I felt it took a strong man to share his toys with another.
“Just tonight?” I questioned with a wink.
“Maybe tomorrow if you are a really bad girl. Let’s focus on tonight.”
Pulling me back into a sitting position, he tied the thick silky bandana across my eyes and tightened it so I could not see anything. Holding my arms and guiding me to the door, Ellie took my other arm and together they led me to the bench. The soft lingerie buffered the coolness of the leather padded seat. Initially sitting, the leg pieces were closer together for comfort while being strapped in. Once restrained, a wheel in the back separated them to a desired width. Each turn clicked and locked a different position, giving me a few moments before turns to adjust comfortably. My arms were bound to the side, with small rods to grip for leverage if needed. It was not painful in the least, only my muscles tensed from the restraint.
I knew that once everything began, my body would pull against the straps and it would not be as relaxed. Lorenzo gave me one last kiss before Ellie went to summon the other men.
“Tell me your safe word Lila.”
I thoroughly considered the one word I would remember in the moment that I could say easy enough to stop everything.
“Mercy.” I replied quietly.
“Are you sure?”
Turning my head towards his voice, I smiled brightly.
“You know for a fact that word will never cross my lips unless I am absolutely sure I cannot take anymore.”
His fingers stroked my cheeks affectionately.
“You will do well. There won’t be a reason for you to say it. I promise.”
I nodded and relaxed into the seat. Ellie coughed indicating that the men were ready. I did not know how many were in the room which only heightened the anticipation. Trusting that everything would go exactly as planned, I readied myself for the first encounter.
With my thighs open wide and hips jacked up, he was able to enter me easily. To each side of my head was a series of rungs for the men to grip onto. I felt his body shake timidly being on display before the others. Clumsily he moved in and out, slick against Lorenzo’s seed and failing to get off as quickly as he hoped. Sensing his frustration I laughed loudly without being able to hold back. He immediately withdrew and mumbled a few curse words as Ellie directed him back to the bedroom to change and be escorted out. A few of the guys snickered at the scene causing me to grow irritated. Although I was not supposed to speak, this was my scene and I was in control.
“Do not be so quick to belittle his performance. I can guarantee almost all of you will fail to please me, so keep that in mind.”
The room grew quiet as the next man approached the bench for his turn. I could tell he was larger in stature by the way his body hovered over mine. He smelled delicious and was gentle about entering me. Collecting wetness on the tip of his cock, he pressed in short movements to which I was thankful due to his enormous girth. Already sore from Lorenzo’s claiming, this one stretched me more than I had ever been before.
“Holy fuck.” I breathed while taking him in completely.
His speed increased, making me wonder if they were instructed they had a certain amount of time to get off. Gripping onto the handles, I struggled not to scream. I felt as if my pelvis was going to shatter and my thighs burned from being pressed so hard into the bench by his massive frame.
“Take it you little bitch,” he growled between thrusts. Clenching myself around him, I snarled.
“Try harder big boy.”
His hand snaked around my back, his hand sliding over my ass. Parting the cheek with two fingers, he plunged his middle one in and resumed his forceful drive. Squirming in the seat, I fought against the urge to climax, and lost. Jerking violently around his cock and finger, the surge of wetness eased his entry. Before he was able to reach his own, Ellie pulled him away before he peaked.
“Time's up.”
He tried to protest and was immediately silenced. Stalking away into another room, I smiled thinking about how hard the asshole was. Ellie came up to me and released me from the bench, yet did not remove my blindfold. With wobbly legs, I was led back into the bedroom as the remaining men in the group followed. One man was instructed to lie on the bed as Ellie assisted me in straddling him from above. Another man was guided behind me, and held my hips gently in place.
Sinking slowly onto the man’s cock below me, he felt vastly inadequate compared to the man who had just taken me. From behind, the other was stroking his cock back and forth across the tight bud. Ellie approached again, speaking softly in Russian to indicate she was near and what she was doing. A warm oil coated the cleave of my rear and allowed the man who was probing to enter a little less painfully. As both men worked in unison, Ellie informed me the man stepping onto the bed was Lorenzo. His hard cock brushed both sides of my cheeks, encouraging me to open wide and take him in my mouth. I could taste myself on him, combined with the saltiness of his expressed seed.
His hand held the back of my head, gripping the hair and guiding my mouth over his shaft. Holding onto his hips with one arm, I stroked his length with the other. The two men pumped furiously into me, yet I was completely focused on Lorenzo. Knowing it was he changed how my body responded. I no longer wanted the others touching me.
“Mercy.” I stated firmly.
Immediately all the men stopped and left the room. Ellie remained to ensure I was okay. As she went to remove my blindfold, I stopped her.
“No, I am not done. I just want Lorenzo. Please get him for me.”
She stepped out of the room and did as I asked. He returned and reached for the blindfold, sliding the fabric from my head. A thin stream of tears poured from the corner of my eyes. His face dropped and he pulled me close.
“Lila, baby, it’s okay.”
I nodded my head and pulled back.
“Tonight I am yours. Do not let me leave this room unsatisfied.”
Knowing I was disappointed with the fantasy, he removed the garments until I was completely bare. He tied my arms to the bedpost, where I rested on my elbows and knees. With my ass perched in the air, he firmly slapped various areas, never the same spot twice.
With both cheeks tender and warm, he parted them gently and teased me with the tip of his cock before ramming in forcefully. This wasn’t a stranger. This was someone I knew and I trusted, pushing me to the edge. My limits had been tested and I now knew where the boundaries lied. I no longer could give myself without including my heart and that scared the shit out of me. The raw truth decimated the walls I had built up inside and I fell apart beneath him, screaming loudly as I came. As we lay panting heavily in the darkened room, his hand stroked my side affectionately. I reached out and grabbed it, bringing his palm to my mouth and kissing softly.
“Thank you Lorenzo.”
He exhaled deeply and pulled me close.
“For what Lila?”
Turning around, I looked into his eyes before kissing his forehead and getting out of the bed. Pulling on my clothes, I stopped at the doorway and smiled.
“For setting me free.”
After walking The Strip until dawn, I caught the first fountain show at the Bellagio before heading south to Phoenix. When I had returned to my hotel room to gather my things, resting on the desk was a dozen red roses and another gold package with a black ribbon. A hand written note was scrawled and tucked within the small velvet jewelry box containing a vintage diamond pendent. Unfolding the half ripped piece of paper, I smiled at which the script was jotted down in haste.
He really was a remarkable man. I would have to make a point to send a fruit arrangement to his office, along with a stripper and a bottle of g
ood cognac. I left Las Vegas with a smile on my face and a brutal ache in my bones. Deciding that writing about certain sexual encounters was certainly more satisfying than experimenting with them, I was thrilled I sated my curiosity for that particular form of kink. The anticipation and preparation was everything I had hoped for and beyond. If not for Lorenzo I would have been completely distraught and disgusted with myself. Although I imagined he was disappointed himself with the outcome, he must have enjoyed a boost of ego with the finer points of the evening by evidence of the parting gift.
The diamonds sparkled under the Arizona sun as I cruised through the desert and into the mountains. The journey was not far to the artsy district of downtown Phoenix known as Roosevelt Row. Jay and Lori had left Cleveland a few years after I did to work with families on reservations out west with water conservation projects. Jay had apprenticed as a Navajo silversmith and Lori ran the gallery featuring native arts which funded their pet projects. They were the type of friends that you should always make an effort to stay in contact with because they are such amazing people. Yet too often the grind of life places those connections on the backburner and dwindles them down to social media likes and the occasional Christmas card.
I found a place to park and jogged eagerly to the brightly colored storefront. Stepping into the gallery, a cool burst of refreshing air pulled me in as the overhead door chimed.
“Are you kidding me? Is that you Lila girl? Get your ass over here and give me a hug!”
Lori had been just inside, perched on a ladder hanging a new display. Crawling down, she opened her arms wide and pulled me in. Her curly blond hair smelled of cedar and lemongrass, as if she had just stepped out of an apothecary. I had sent them an email just before leaving Glenwood Springs promising them a visit if I could swing it. Being so close I knew I would kick myself if I had really passed up the opportunity.
“Where’s Jay?” I asked looking around at the beautiful works.
“Oh, he’s at the hardware store getting some grout. We are redoing the bathroom here and he ran out. He will be back in a bit, but what’s been going on with you lady?”
I steadied the ladder as she ascended back up to finish her task. Trying to only mention things I thought she would find interesting, I shared my trip to Moab and the Black Rock Desert, ending with my offer in Vegas, minus the amount. Turning the focus onto their shop, she was ecstatic to share everything they had been up to. An hour later, Jay came strolling in with arms full of plastic bags. Once he saw who was helping Lori, he set them down and gave me a big smile.
“Bout time your ass made it down here!”
I laughed and gave my old friend a warm hug.
“Yeah, yeah, I know. Lori already gave me the third degree. I feel bad enough as it is. There’s no excuse, but I am here now.”
Jay motioned for me to follow him back with the bags and to grab a beer. Behind the gallery was a small workshop and a set of stairs.
“You guys live here too?” I asked when entering the multi level apartment.
From the outside you would never know how awesome the building was. A spacious kitchen and living area rested below an open loft space. Off to the back of the kitchen was a large wooden deck looking over downtown Phoenix. Something like this in New York would cost a few million dollars and be indefinitely noisier. It was an incredible place to live and work. I could picture Grant having a place like this.
I frowned when the thought crossed my mind.
No Lila, you can’t think about him, let it go.
Convincing myself to forget about him was easier said than done. While driving to Phoenix I noticed mountain bikes on the back of every vehicle, every white SUV jumped out to my attention.
“You okay Lila? You look a little lost over there?”
Jay had noticed I was spacing out and looked concerned.
“Yes, just a rough couple weeks. I’m good. Where’s that beer you promised?”
He handed me a small bottle with a corked lid and wire cage. Trying to figure out how to open it, he took it back and popped the cage and cork off.
“It’s one of my favorite batches, perfect for hot days. Not too heavy.”
Taking a sip of the bottle, sharp hops hit my tongue before balancing smoothly.
“Yum, this is super tasty!”
He grabbed a few more and led me back down to the gallery. It was still early in the day for them to be closing the shop, but since it was slow, they called in someone to watch it for a few hours.
“Do you have a swimming suit with you Lila? If not I can just let you borrow one. We need to get going, it’s already hot.”
I looked at them both curiously, and shook my head.
“Where are we going?” I asked as she dragged me back up the stairs.
“We have a boat and we’re going up to Canyon Lake to do a little swimming.”
Excitedly I grabbed one of the suits and a towel and helped her pack. Jay already had food and beer ready to go, I just happened to catch them on the perfect day.
“I would have been upset if you guys weren’t around. Good timing eh?”
Nodding in agreement, we hopped into Jay’s truck and headed to the marina to pick up the boat. It was a sweet bow rider that only looked to be a few years old, and they were proud to show it off.
“So do you come up here a lot? It’s gorgeous!”
I couldn’t get over how beautiful the rocks were and the saguaro cactus that dotted the landscape. The water was a deep shade of blue and glistened as water-skiers and kayaks shared the lake.
Unfastening the ropes from the dock, Lori slowly started to back out of the slip while Jay made sure the boat did not hit the sides.
“We try and come up at least twice a week. It’s one of the few things we can do at odd hours, just come out at night and sleep on the boat under the stars and go out in the morning.”
I was envious of the life they had built. They did not have a ton of money, but they were obviously happy and making a difference in the world. Together as partners they worked hard and enjoyed the fruits of their labor. I could sense a story about them brewing in my head, yet I gently reminded myself to be present.
For two days I savored every moment of my time with them. Because they knew Hunter and had seen the video, I finally told someone other than my family what had happened. They too knew Savion yet did not seem surprised by his decline. In addition, I shared my week with Grant. When talking about him, my hands became so animated and everything in me lit up. They saw the sore on my leg at the lake and I felt compelled to come clean. I mauled over everything that was about to take place and how I had to return to New York to sign the contract.
“Do you have to stay there? Can’t you write anywhere?”
I stubbornly protested and brought up that he abandoned me in the desert with his friends.
“Yes, but he did it because he felt like he couldn’t say goodbye to you. Didn’t you say the guy’s best friend was killed in an accident that he was also in not long before? I wouldn’t want to say goodbye to anyone either. Give the guy a break, he sounds great and from what you say seems crazy about you.”
Lori knew she was right, and Jay agreed with her. I was being a fool. My own reservations about the kind of person I was would never let me be happy with anyone ever. I would always find an excuse as to why it wouldn’t work to protect my heart from getting hurt. I decided to give myself a few days to think about contacting Grant after the contract was signed. I still had time to back out of the contract, but I wouldn’t do it.
I packed up the car at dawn and hugged my friends tightly. My flight from Los Angeles would be leaving the next day and gave me little time to visit Hollywood and Beverly Hills. I had a few last minute bucket list items before rejoining the rat race and played my music loudly while flying across the desert into the city of angels. My room at the Chateau Marmont placed me right at the pulse of hopeful celebrity sightings at the bar, and was unfortunately swamped with tourists hoping to
do the same. I walked along Hollywood Boulevard to Mann’s Chinese Theatre and placed my hands in Marilyn Monroe’s. I walked Venice Beach down to Santa Monica Pier and cruised along Rodeo Drive in less than twenty four hours.
As the cool waters of the Pacific Ocean crashed along my feet, the last ounce of obstinacy flowed out and was swept away with the current. I wanted Grant. I wanted to try and see where something good took me, rather than destroying it with doubt. I still had New York to contend with, and if by the end of the week I still felt the same, I would fly to Vancouver and surprise him. I took into consideration that my last surprise did not go over so well, yet in the off chance that I was wrong, I would know just as quickly that it was not real.
My flight to LaGuardia was long and grueling. I was so exhausted by the journey that I slept for twelve hours after arriving at the hotel. A car was scheduled to pick me up the next morning for my meeting with Rectory House and Lorenzo messaged me to tell me everything was still on track and not to let them talk me out of the agreed amount. My stomach was in knots pulling up to the skyscraper that held the century old publishing group. Today, once my name was signed, I would be leaving with an entire team ready to take my story and share it with the world. That thought frightened me more than signing away on the project. I would have to force myself not to read reviews nor take negative criticism personally.
The conference room was packed as I was guided in by the agents from dinner the weekend before. At the head of the table was the CEO, Mr. Leroy Benson, along with an attorney to oversee the contract, a publicist, member of marketing, and my new assistant Hillary Banks. Contrary to Lorenzo’s warning, there was no suggestion of a counteroffer and they were all genuinely happy to have me on board. A bottle of champagne was brought in and a photo taken of the occasion.
Mr. Benson had scheduled a tentative press release about my addition to the company that would go out the next day. Aside from the standard publicity related engagements I was anticipating once the book was released, my presence in New York was not necessary. I stayed for a total of two weeks to familiarize myself with the company and get to know my new agent and assistant.
