by K. E. Miller
“What were you thinking?” he finally asked, his voice surprisingly harsh.
“You could have been killed,” he said.
“I know how to protect myself,” I retorted. I knew it didn’t really matter what I said. He needed an outlet for his anger, which was just a mask for his fear.
“That doesn’t mean you put yourself in danger like that,” he argued. “Putting yourself in the way of a spy’s blade wasn’t part of the plan. It was reckless.”
“We both knew the danger of going into that room. I understand you were afraid for me, but I’m fine. The plan worked. We know who was giving information to the Council. It had to be done.”
“I don’t care about that!” he exploded. He turned away from me and ran a shaking hand through his hair.
“You don’t understand,” he continued. “I cannot lose you again. I won’t survive it.”
All the anger had left his voice. I began to see for the first time, how much the Exodus had affected him and my heart ached. I walked over to him, but he refused to look me in the eye. When he finally did, I saw the depth of his fear. The desire to comfort him was overwhelming.
“I’m not going anywhere. I promise you,” I said, reaching up to wrap my arms around his neck. I held him tightly, as though I could put all of my love for him into that one embrace. I could feel his arms around me, but he didn’t really return my hug. After a few moments, he pulled away.
“We still have things to do he said.”
I hesitantly offered him my hand, unsure that he would take it. I was relieved when he did. We left the room and made our way toward Nolen’s office. I tried not to be too upset by the wall that now seemed to be between us. It was impossible to tell from his face what he was feeling and I didn’t sense anything from him as he had closed himself off to me. As we approached Nolen’s office, it became increasingly clear by the way Aaron barely held my hand that he was far from being his normal self.
◆◆◆
When Aaron and I entered Nolen’s office, the room was utterly silent. Nolen was leaning against his desk watching the others who were all standing on the other side of the room. Aside from Nolen, everyone looked nervous and agitated. Nolen straightened when he saw that it was Aaron and I.
He bowed slightly and said, “These are the elected representatives of the Clans. The only Clan without representation is the Mages.”
“It was never expected that the Mages would elect someone,” Aaron said, stress evident in his voice, though I could tell he was trying to conceal it.
“You will serve until they agree to elect someone,” I told Nolen. Walking over to the others I continued, “Perhaps you could make the introductions.”
“Of course, your majesty,” he replied, coming to stand next to me. “The representative from the Warrior Clan is Devlin Brady.”
I didn’t need to be told which of the people before me was the Warrior. With his tall muscular frame and sword sheathed at his side, Devlin stood apart from the others. He bowed his head to me.
“We’re honored by your presence, Warrior Brady,” I said, smiling at him.
“Eolande Torrin is the Elemental representative,” Nolen continued. He motioned to a small woman who was so fair she looked like she was still a child. Her eyes were bright blue and her hair was so pale it appeared white.
“Breena Keen is our Spirit representative.”
Breena’s features were very similar to Eolande’s. The main difference between the two women was their height. Breena towered over Eolande and her blue eyes had dimmed with age.
Continuing, Nolen motioned to the short elderly man with a long white beard. The little man squinted at me through his glasses as Nolen introduced him as Nevan Monahan, the Sorcerer.
“And finally, this is Glenda Owen. She is the representative for the Bards.”
Glenda had golden hair similar to mine, but her bouncy curls fell to her knees in ringlets most girls envied. Her brown eyes were gentle and kind and her skin was the color of caramel.
“Thank you all for agreeing to serve on this committee. Please have a seat,” I said, wanting everyone to be relaxed. I knew the coming discussion would be tense. No one ever wanted to talk about war.
I sat down on the sofa facing everyone and suddenly felt very alone. Nolen sat with the rest of the representatives. I felt only a small sense of relief as Aaron sat next to me. I looked to him for reassurance, but only found the tension that was still flowing through him. He seemed to see my anxiousness though, because he took my hand and held it lightly. Although it was far from his usually comforting grip, the fear of my position was lessened slightly by his touch.
Turning back to my new committee, I said, “First, I think you will all be interested to know that we have a spy in custody.”
“Killian Regan,” Aaron added.
“It is our belief that he has been passing information to the Council for years,” I said.
“Killian, a spy?” Nevan asked, incredulously, his voice even frailer than his looks. “It’s well known that he was one of your strongest supporters before the Exodus.”
This was surprising to me. From what little I could remember Killian had always been a shady character, but it was possible I had been the only person to notice. After all, he had managed to successfully spy on the Resistance for quite some time. It made sense, though that Killian would be so outspoken in his support of Aaron and me. It was the perfect cover to hide his real loyalties.
“The Exodus was difficult for everyone. It’s possible that Dominic made him promises that he could not refuse,” Aaron said.
I wondered how much personal experience Aaron had with Dominic and his promises.
“He’s a traitor. He should be executed,” Eolande said, surprising me with her forceful words.
“There may be information to learn from him,” I said. “We should avoid execution.”
“At least for the time being,” Aaron added.
I blinked at him in shock. I found myself repulsed by the idea of ordering someone’s execution, regardless of his or her crimes. I didn’t want that kind of thing weighing on my conscience. I knew there might come a time when I had no choice, but I didn’t need Aaron encouraging it.
“What about his Warriors?” Devlin asked.
“I doubt they had any idea. Killian was only a successful spy as long as no one suspected him,” Aaron replied.
“I would like for all of you to take over whatever responsibilities the Mages had,” I said, wanting to move on before more executions were proposed. “You should meet in their old chamber. Aiden and I will check in with you and you can certainly come to us if we are needed, but for the most part you’ll be on your own. We have war to deal with.”
“You’re truly going to wage a war against the Council?” Nevan asked, nervously. “I thought perhaps it was just a way of saying that the two of you were going to fight them. I wasn’t expecting that we would all be expected to participate.”
“No war can be fought by only two individuals,” Devlin said, casting a dark look in Nevan’s direction.
“What damage can any of us possibly do against the Council” Nevan replied, his voice gaining two octaves as he spoke.
“More than you might think,” Aaron answered. “Your strength lies in the Council’s belief that you’re not a threat to them. This makes all of the Clans a very real and formidable weapon.”
Nevan looked at Aaron like he was crazy.
“We aren’t asking you to fight Dominic,” I said, trying to reassure the little man. “But we will need everyone’s help if we are going to win this war. The first thing we need to do is reorganize the way the Resistance has been living. Until now, your only goal was to survive. Now we must begin training. Anyone capable should receive training from the Warriors and the Mages once they decide to cooperate. We must start using all of our intelligence in an offensive manner. If we can start fighting back, word will get around to others and we can sway them to our side, ta
king away from the Council’s ranks.”
“Are you certain that this is a wise course of action, your majesty?” Breena asked. “Most here would be more than happy to continue on, under your rule. Is there really a need for war? Do you really think we can win?”
Everyone seemed to be looking at me very intently as they waited for me to answer Breena’s question. I considered it carefully, wanting to give an honest answer. I wished, not for the first time, that I could remember more about my life as Sophia. Surely, I’d foreseen all of this and had made plans for what we should do when the time came to fight the Council. Without those memories I was just trusting my instincts and hoping that my decisions were right. I knew we would win, but I had no memory of how.
“The only way any of us will ever truly be safe is if the Council is destroyed,” I said, carefully, hoping I sounded confident. “If I could go right now and destroy them, I would. And we will succeed. I’ve seen it.”
Chapter 9
Aaron
When the meeting ended, I left Nolen’s office. The new Committee had left and Shaylee was discussing with Nolen the best way to begin training people. Part of me felt guilty for walking out, not saying a word to Shaylee, but another part of me couldn’t bring myself to forgive her recklessness with the Mages.
I needed time to think and I needed space from Shaylee to do it. Every time she glanced at me, I was back in that chamber, reliving the whole event. Even though I had explained to her that I couldn’t live with myself if something happened to her again, she didn’t seem to fully grasp just how difficult her death had been for me.
I walked into my room and locked the door behind me, determined to shut out the rest of the world as I wallowed in my unhappiness. I dropped onto the bed and stared up at the ceiling. I desperately wanted to let go of my anger, but the incident had taken me back to how I’d felt during my first few years in the Mortal Realm. Back when I’d wandered the Earth in despair, believing I would never see my wife again. Shaylee had been so reckless and no matter what I said, she didn’t seem to see that. I closed my eyes and attempted to relax.
I opened my eyes when there was a knock on the door. I sat up and looked at the clock. It was just after midnight. Almost four hours had passed since I’d left Nolen’s office. I got up to answer the door, amazed that I’d even managed to fall asleep in the first place.
Thorn stood outside of my room, looking weary.
“Nolen has asked to see you, your majesty,” he said.
“Now? At this time of night?” I asked.
“Yes. We’ve just finished interrogating Killian.”
Needing no further explanation, I left my room. Thorn and I made our way back to Nolen’s office in silence. As we walked, I noticed that Thorn was walking at a subdued pace. I glanced up at his face and noticed that he seemed lost in thought. I wondered what was causing the Warrior such discomfort.
We entered to find Nolen sitting at his desk, staring straight ahead. It seemed to me that he was unaware that anyone had entered the room. Thorn and I stood just inside the door for what seemed like an eternity, without notice. I cleared my throat, finally catching Nolen’s attention.
“Please come in, your majesty. I apologize, I was deep in thought.” Even his voice sounded distant.
I walked over to the sofa Shaylee and I had shared hours earlier and sat down. It was beginning to dawn on me that whatever had been learned from Killian was making both Nolen and Thorn extremely uncomfortable. As I studied them, I noticed the worry on both of their faces. Dread was beginning to seep into me as Nolen sat down across from me and Thorn sat in a chair to my right.
“Why do I get the feeling you’re about to tell me something I really don’t want hear?” I asked.
“Probably because your majesty knows we wouldn’t have wanted to have this conversation in the middle of the night otherwise,” Nolen replied.
“If this is so important, where’s Shaylee?” I asked. Although I was still upset, her absence from what I guessed was about to become an important meeting was making me feel worse.
“We thought it would be best to bring this to your attention first,” Nolen said with hesitation. There were knots in my stomach as I waited for him to continue. I could see from both of their faces that I really did not want to hear what he would say next.
“According to Killian, the Council is going to kill the queen.”
I stared at him with no emotion.
“We already knew they were after her. I don’t understand why that’s news to you,” I said, trying to understand their distress.
“This is different, your majesty,” Thorn said. “They have a plan; some means of drawing her out. They know where we are. They’re watching us. When she leaves, they have a powerful Mage who has sworn to either kill her or die in the attempt.”
“She’s more powerful than any assassin,” I argued.
“Perhaps,” Nolen said. “but I believe that she’ll have some difficulty using her full power against an assassin who was a life-long friend.”
“What are you saying?”
“Cole Blake is the assassin.”
I sat back. What I’d feared for so many years about Blake was true; he was loyal to Dominic. Until hearing those words from Nolen, I’d always been sure the Cole Blake had been coerced into following the will of the Council and had never truly betrayed Sophia.
“What else did Killian say?” I asked.
“Nothing of use,” Thorn answered.
“In the morning send Jaden in. She may be able to get more out of him using a different approach. If he knows anything else about this, I want to know.”
Jaden may not have Thorn’s centuries of experience, but in some situations that was a good thing. Jaden saw the world differently than Thorn and she had different skills. It was possible she wouldn’t learn nothing new, but it was worth it to give her a chance.
“Jaden doesn’t know about any of this. She’s been guarding the queen since this afternoon,” Thorn said.
I nodded, pleased to find out that Shaylee had no idea what was happening.
“In the morning fill Jaden in, but tell her I want this kept secret. Shaylee isn’t to hear about any of this. If she found out, she may go looking for Blake.”
Before her confrontation with Kilian, I would never have suspected Shaylee would do something as dangerous as go after a Council Mage on her own, but now I was unsure what she was capable of. If she learned that her childhood friend had plans to kill her for the Council, I really didn’t know what she would do. I found myself doubting everything I’d thought I knew about her and hating myself for those doubts at the same time.
◆◆◆
After talking with Nolen and Thorn, I went back to my room. I attempted to go back to sleep, but was unsuccessful. I began pacing around the room. My mind continued going over everything I’d heard, trying to find what we were missing, but my thoughts kept returning to Shaylee.
Some time had passed when I finally looked at the clock. There were still a few hours left before anyone would be awake. Deciding that I could no longer stand to be in my room, I left and began roaming the halls. Eventually, I found myself in the library. I browsed the books, hoping for a distraction, but I soon discovered that the library only reminded me more of Shaylee.
Just as I was about to turn around and leave, I heard a noise. Turning, I saw Jaden coming down the aisle towards me. She looked pleased to see me. I made a conscious effort to try and hide how stressed and unhappy I was feeling, but her expression quickly changed and I knew I had failed.
“I’ve been looking for you,” she said.
“Why?”
“Shaylee’s been worried about you. She was having trouble sleeping so I said I would go and look for you.”
I shrugged and turned away, ignoring the guilt I was suddenly feeling. I had only taken one step when I felt her strong hand on my arm. I turned back to her when it was clear she wasn’t going to allow me to escape.
> “Tell me what’s going on,” she insisted.
“She didn’t tell you?” I asked.
“No, but whatever it is I can tell it’s really bothering both of you. So why don’t you be the one to tell me about it?”
As always, Jaden seemed to be the only one who didn’t care what Clan I was from or that I was the king. It wasn’t the first time I envied her for her ability to say exactly what was on her mind. I motioned to one of the tables and we both sat down. My guilt was really starting to get to me. I knew Shaylee had to be really worried if she sent Jaden to look for me. I forced myself to push the guilt aside and focused on my anger.
“It was when we were dealing with the Mages,” I told her.
As I confided in Jaden, I found that I was beginning to feel a lot better. It was as though a huge weight had been lifted from me. I realized that what I’d needed the whole time was just for someone to listen to my fears and concerns.
“I can understand where you’re coming from,” Jaden nodded. “I didn’t see what happened, but I’m sure it was crazy scary. However, I do think you’ve forgotten what kind of person Shaylee is. Your fear has clouded your perception of her. She is both strong and powerful, but without you she’s vulnerable. Ever since you left Nolen’s office, she’s been a wreck. She’s just starting to realize how powerful she really is, but she’ll only be able to control it and harness it if she has all of us to keep her grounded. Her friends and family are what keep her in the light. Without that, I don’t know what she would become. I couldn’t convince her to eat dinner and she’s barely slept. She needs you.”
“She needs you too,” I replied. My anger had completely evaporated and I found myself feeling more and more remorseful.
