He sat back down, but he looked ready to explode.
“So that brings up my next reason for talking to you.” Dave straightened in his seat again. “You should not dabble in looking for a drug dealer. It isn’t safe. Not even for a cop. Certainly not for a woman. You’ll find yourself as dead as Claire in a heartbeat.” He narrowed his stern gaze. “Do you hear me?”
“Yes.” The word was breathy.
“I know it may seem like the police are doing nothing to find out what happened to Claire, but that isn’t entirely true. We’re tracking several known drug dealers all over the city.”
Emily opened her mouth to interrupt, but Dave held up a hand to stop her. “I’m not saying we’re specifically working on your sister’s case, just that we’re aware of every OD in this city. We don’t take these things lightly, and we will bust every dealer we can as we find them. It takes time.” He leaned closer to her again so his face was inches from hers. “Don’t mess with this sort of thing, Emily. You’re a cute vibrant woman. I’d hate to see anything happen to you.”
She nodded, her voice caught in her throat at the serious way he nailed her.
“I assume Rider knows nothing about this or he wouldn’t have given me such grief about speaking to you.”
She nodded again.
“You should tell him.”
“I—”
Dave shook his head. “I don’t care what’s going on between you and Rider, but he is a cop, and a good one, one of the best. It’s wrong of you to keep this kind of secret from him.”
“He’s just training me,” she whispered.
Dave smiled warmly. “I see. Well, I’m not buying that, so take my advice.”
“I’ll think about it.”
“Please do.”
A shadow covered them both as those last words left Dave’s lips.
Emily lifted her gaze to find Rider standing over her, his patience used up. “You’ll think about what?”
“Leave it alone, Rider,” Dave said as he stood. He grabbed Rider’s bicep in a friendly manner and looked him in the eye. “I was just leaving. Enjoy your evening.” Dave released Rider and walked away.
Rider whipped his gaze to Emily. “What the hell was that all about?”
Emily cringed. “Hey, don’t yell at me. And stop staring at me as though I slept with somebody else in front of you.”
Rider slid into the seat Dave vacated, across from Emily instead of next to her as he usually did. She didn’t miss the slight.
She lifted her chin and confronted him. “You’ve been strange this entire evening, Rider.”
“Me? I’m not the one who spent twenty minutes arguing with a stranger while my face was white as a sheet. What gives, Em?”
It was the second time he’d called her that, and she flinched again, as she had the first time. She didn’t want him to use that name for her, not in a tone that pretended he cared. Because clearly he did not.
“It’s really none of your business, Rider.” She crossed her arms, figuring defiant was her best option right now. She didn’t have the energy for anything else.
He opened his mouth in shock. “Seriously? You’re going to sit there and tell me it’s perfectly normal for some random guy in the club to ask me to leave my own woman at the table so he can tell her some long drawn-out story while I watch from across the room, and I’m supposed to just grin and move on?”
“Your woman?” Her voice rose as she released her arms to grab the edge of the table. “Your woman?” she repeated louder. “That’s rich, Rider. First of all, you know good and well Dave is not some random guy. You know him. I’ve never met him. But he’s a cop on your force.
“And secondly, I am not your woman. You’ve made that perfectly clear from the start and numerous times since then. You’ve pointed out to nearly every person we approach that you’re merely training me in the ways of submission, and have no intention whatsoever of getting involved with me. I’m super fucking clear about that.”
Rider opened his mouth, but she shut him down.
“Let me finish. Now, I realize I’m at least as much to blame in whatever the hell is happening between us as you are. After all, I never wanted to get involved either. I simply wanted the experience, and you gave it to me.”
“Are you fucking dissing me, Emily?”
She glared at him. “How dare you? I can hardly break up with somebody who was never mine in the first place, Rider, The Enforcer.” She fought to keep her voice down so no one would overhear the biggest fight she’d ever had with a man in her life. She’d never been as ballsy as she was right then. The club was noisy enough and the music loud enough she thought they were safe from wandering ears.
Rider protested. “That’s not fair. Of course I care about you. And I won’t deny I’m attracted to you besides as a trainee. But it doesn’t change the fact that I’m not boyfriend material. I told you that. However, when you’re with me as my submissive, it’s my job to take care of you. I would do the same for any woman I dominate, even if it’s just for the evening.”
Emily gasped.
Rider shook his head. “That didn’t come out right.” He reached across the table to take her hand.
She pulled away and dodged him. “Don’t.”
He lowered his tone and his voice. “You weren’t supposed to fall for me. That was never my intention, baby.”
Emily stared at him, her heart pounding, her hands shaking at his audacity. “Rider Henderson. You may be able to control every aspect of my body, including my reactions to you both emotionally and physically, but there’s one sacred thing about me that you cannot and will not ever control, and that’s my mind. I own my feelings. They’re not yours.
“You can command me to my knees and make me long to suck you off until I salivate. You can climb between my legs and torture me until I beg you for release, but don’t for one second think you can crawl into my head and tell me how to feel about you. If I fell for you, that’s on me, and it’s mine.”
She scooted from the table and stood to her full height, her stature so much smaller than him, it was absurd next to him even seated. But she didn’t care. “I’m leaving. I’ll have Harper get my bag from your locker. Don’t move until I’m gone. I won’t hesitate to cause a scene. I can’t face you anymore tonight.”
Emily strode across the room toward the front entrance using every ounce of strength she had to make it to the door. She hated she would have to wait for Harper to retrieve her belongings, and she hated even more she didn’t have a car. But neither could be helped. She was strong enough to hold it together for a few more minutes.
Harper consented readily without asking a single question. She figured it was his job.
He returned with her bag in less than a minute and had Frank get her a taxi in no time.
Before she completely melted inside the club, she was safely ensconced in a cab, traveling down the road to her condo.
She stared out the window, willing herself to wait until she was home before she cried.
It wasn’t that she was particularly angry with Rider, or Dave for that matter, but she was emotionally drained. And after the intense sex she’d had before entering the main part of the club, she barely had the energy to haul herself from the car to her front door. She did it though, tipping and thanking the driver.
The second she shut the door behind her, she slipped to the floor and cried. She cried for so many reasons she couldn’t list them in her head.
She cried for the sister she’d lost who had taken too many drugs and died alone in her apartment with no one to save her. If only Emily had been there that night, or that day, or the day before. Would things have gone differently? Could she have stopped her sister from doing the last line of coke that ended her life? Her guilt was a weight pressing on her chest and adding ten pounds to her small frame. No one could understand why she needed answers. She couldn’t sleep properly until she did something. Anything.
Dave had a point thoug
h. She’d never stopped to consider how dangerous it was for her to snoop around looking for a drug dealer. She’d only pictured coming into a bar, asking around about Claire, figuring out who she hung with and determining which of those people sold her drugs. It wasn’t that she intended to face the guy herself. She just thought if she had the ammo, she could hand it to the cops.
The idea was preposterous, and besides, whatever her sister was involved in, it hadn’t happened at Extreme. Harper was indeed diligent about who was admitted. If Claire came to Extreme regularly, as her calendar suggested, then her sister simply had a submissive side. It had nothing to do with her drug addiction.
Emily hadn’t gone back to Extreme over and over again because she was still looking for answers about Claire. She wasn’t stupid enough not to recognize she truly fell for Rider and wanted to experience everything he had to offer.
She winced as she thought about Rider. He hadn’t done anything wrong. Yelling at him because she fell for him during the process had been counterproductive. Like he said, he’d been up front from the beginning.
Emily hauled herself off the ground and made her way to the bedroom. She paused to strip off her clothes, brush her teeth, and wash her face, and then she slipped between her cool sheets naked. She told herself she’d grown used to the idea. It had nothing to do with some misplaced desire to please a temporary Dom.
She needed to pull herself together and get on with her life. Pining over a man who didn’t want her was idiotic. Especially since she’d been only marginally less adamant than him. Introducing him to her parents or anyone else she knew was out of the questions. That was no way to start a relationship, even if her heart screamed in protest.
Chapter Thirteen
“What happened to you last night, man?” Gage asked as Rider dragged himself into the gym and dropped his bag next to the weights. “I saw you come in with Emily and disappear into a private room and then I never saw you again.”
Rider took a deep breath. “We were there, but we had a fight, and she left.”
“She left?” Gage stepped closer. “You didn’t take her home?”
“Nope. She made it very clear she wanted to take a cab. So I let her go.”
“Wow. I’m sorry. That sucks.”
“Yeah. It’s probably for the best.”
“Why? I thought you two were…cozy.”
Rider rolled his eyes. “Can you not use the word cozy in the same sentence with my name?” He smiled as he picked up a set of weights.
“Hey, you looked like your cock was about to leap out of your pants the way you wormed your way through the club into a private room.”
“Well, that part was true.” Rider did smile at that memory. “And Emily is a fantastic sub. She never needed any training in the first place. She is a natural. The role suits her perfectly.”
“But?”
Rider exhaled and turned toward Gage. “I was an ass. I’ll admit it. I’m not interested in a long-term thing with anyone. I tried to make that clear, but…”
“But she fell for you anyway.”
“Yes. It appears that way.”
“Is that so bad? I mean you like her. Why not try the dating scene?”
Rider shook his head. “Not interested. And besides, Emily probably wouldn’t have me after the way I treated her anyway. I deserve everything she dished out.”
“I don’t believe that for a minute.”
Rider shrugged. “Doesn’t matter what you believe.”
“Are you just going to drop her? End of subject?”
“No. That would be rude. I’ll give her a few days. She was really pissed. But I do need to see her again. I was training her. We need closure if nothing else.”
Gage chuckled again. “Give her a few days because she needs to cool off? That’s hilarious, dude. You really don’t know women, do you?”
“Don’t need to,” Rider said as he put the first set of weights down and picked up another. “That’s the whole point.”
Gage stepped in front of him. “Listen. I know you don’t want to hear this, and you can roll your eyes all you want and cuss at me if it makes you feel better, but hear me out. You’re probably right. Emily does seem to be a natural submissive. I don’t know what you two fought about, but consider this from her angle. Until a few weeks ago, she had never set foot in a fetish club. Everything in your world is new to her. Fuck, she’d never been to a fight either, and she loved it. You probably need to cut her a bit of slack if she’s struggling to come to terms with so many things at once. Be patient. I know you like her. You can deny it all you want, but it’s obvious to all of us. Make nice. Say you’re sorry. That’s what women want.”
“She said some choice things too, dude.” Rider set the weight he’d been holding on the rack. “And she has some fucking secret she won’t talk about.”
Gage nodded. “Step back and give her a chance. Nobody suggested you had to marry her next weekend. Take it slow. She’ll come around when she gets to know you better.” Gage leaned forward. “The look in her eyes tells all of us you hang the moon for her. Don’t fuck this up.”
»»•««
Emily picked up her phone on Wednesday afternoon and rolled her eyes. It was the third text she’d gotten from Rider. She was growing tired of seeing his name show up on the screen. She could tell by his word choice he didn’t get her at all. And it was just as well. She needed to move on. So, she ignored him again.
By Friday, she was exasperated. She called Virginia and made plans to go to the movies with her. Anything to avoid being at Extreme or her own condo.
Rider’s last text said he really wanted to see her. They had unfinished business and would she please come to the club that night. He never said he was sorry or he cared, just that he needed to see her.
Emily ignored him yet again and tried to enjoy an evening with Virginia. When she got home, she was exhausted. She hadn’t slept well for the entire week and she fell into bed rereading Rider’s texts as if she hadn’t punished herself enough.
While she held the phone, it pinged again. She flinched.
Please text me so I’ll know you’re okay, Em.
There he was using her nickname again. He had no right to that name.
Tears welled up in her eyes and fell to her pillow. She flopped onto her back and stared at the ceiling. She wasn’t even naked this time. She’d given that up by about Wednesday. It had seemed absurd to follow the rules of a man she wasn’t talking to.
She tried to visualize a life with him in it. V liked him. What would her parents think? He was certainly nice enough. It wasn’t like he would embarrass her in front of anyone. As long as he was his normal public self, anyone would like him. But what if he wanted her to submit in front of other people?
Ugh. No way. She couldn’t bring that out from the privacy of her home or the club. Anywhere else would never be acceptable. And dominating was his way of life.
She flipped her pillow over and tried to sleep.
She tossed and turned for over an hour, beating the pillow several times to fluff it up. Her tank top twisted around her waist as she flipped from side to side.
It was after midnight when a knock sounded at her door.
Emily bolted to a sitting position. What the fuck? No one came to her home in the middle of the night.
She froze. And then her phone pinged again.
Rider.
Emily, it’s me. Open the door, please.
Shit.
No fucking way. It was a bad idea.
She texted back.
Are you crazy? Do you know what time it is?
Of course. And if you would have returned any of my texts, I wouldn’t be standing at your door now. I was worried.
He was worried?
Did it ever occur to you I didn’t want to text you back?
Open the door, Emily.
Oh. My. God. She had to put an end to this. The man was driving her crazy. She flung the tangle of sheets off her and
stomped to the front door. Maybe if she faced him, she could make herself clearer. Ignoring him and arguing with him by text didn’t seem to get through to him.
Emily yanked open the door so fast, she never paused to consider her attire. Until she saw his face.
Rider stared at her with his mouth open, his gaze traveling the length of her from top to bottom and then back up again.
Emily decided to play it off. She rolled her eyes. “Oh come on. You’ve seen me in far less clothing that this.” She opened the door wider. “Come inside. You’re letting the air out.”
Rider stepped in and let her shut the door before he spoke. When he did, he carefully changed his face from shocked lust to a smirk. “Panties? Really? You still have some in your drawer?”
Emily stomped away and plopped onto the couch. “What do you want, Rider? I was in bed. Some people sleep at night.”
Rider sauntered over to her and sat next to her on the couch. He pointed at her chest. “Sleeping? In a tank top and panties.” He tsked. “I’m so disappointed. Have I taught you nothing?”
She gave him an evil narrowed stare with her head cocked to one side. “Ha ha. I thought it was clear you were done with me. Since I haven’t submitted to another particular Dom yet, I believe I can make my own rules.”
He cringed. “Ouch.”
“Yeah, well…”
“Look, I wanted to apologize. I said some things the other night that were…unnecessary.”
“Ya think?”
She curled her legs under her and closed herself off from him by crossing her arms over her chest. It wasn’t much, considering she was wearing so little. But it was something.
Rider eased onto the floor and kneeled in front of her. “Emily, I’m sorry.” He set his hands on her legs and gently tugged her body square with his. “I’m sorry.” He kissed her forehead.
She held her breath. This wasn’t supposed to be happening like this. She was so angry with him. She needed distance. Not this.
He kissed her cheek. “I’m sorry, baby,” he repeated. “I’ve been an ass.” He set his forehead against hers and forced her gaze to meet his. “I was insensitive and rude to you repeatedly. I should have considered your feelings.”
The Fight Club - Boxed Set Page 57
