by Lolah Lace
Today I had some personal business to attend to. It was something I had put off for some time but today I would handle it once and for all. I didn’t want to go into the city…traffic, parking meters, parking garages and people. I didn’t feel like I had much of a choice. I had never gone to jail to visit anyone. Sure some of my old buddies from high school graduated to life’s of crime after high school graduation. Once they went into lock up I was done with them.
I had never bothered to visit my brother when he was in jail. His various possession of a control substance charges were foreign to me. Why he became a druggy was baffling to me. My brother and I were like night and day. I was the good son. Ryan was not.
I would sometimes give our mother bail money to get my brother out but I never went to see him in jail. I never went to any of his numerous court dates. I didn’t have time for fuck-ups and today I was on my way to visit the biggest one that ever blew into my life.
After Hailey was born I decided to straighten up my act and walk on the right side of the law. I wanted to be a good role model for my daughter. I wanted a better life for her then the lonely one I had growing up.
Although it was my first time going to visit someone in jail, I knew about the process. I had heard it described many times from people that had served time and the people that had come to see them. Rebecca was locked up in the Cook County jail. Her crime was committed in the city of Chicago. She was in with the hardened criminals. I could say it serves her right but I don’t know how I feel. I don’t know how to process my feelings. I just know it hurts me to be without Hailey. I know that it hurts Rebecca just as much. She is her mother. She lost Hailey too.
After a rigorous screening process I was finally seated behind the glass of booth three. There was a phone on the wall of the small cubicle. It was just like the movies. I looked up from the phone as Rebecca walked in. She was in handcuffs. She was wearing a two piece pale blue prison uniform. I saw the white letters CCDOC printed on the back when she turned to pull her chair out. She sat on the opposite side of the glass partition. She used her handcuffed wrists to pick up the phone and I followed suit. This was surreal. I was here at the Cook County Department of Corrections visiting my late daughter’s mother.
“Luke, I’m so glad you came.” She forced a smile.
“I said I would come.” Rebecca looked terrible. Her long blonde hair looked stingy and oily. Her face was pale and blotchy. She had lost a lot of weight. I remembered how she looked when we first met, like Pamela Anderson in her Baywatch days. “You look kind of thin.”
“The food here is terrible.”
“Have you heard anything about bail?”
“Maybe, I got my cousin working on my mother. She is taking my calls now. It’s not just the one charge so the bond is higher than it would normally be. That’s what my lawyer told me.”
“Okay.”
“Luke, I’m sorry. I never thought. I didn’t think I had that much to drink.”
“Well you did.” I heard this same story over the phone.
“I don’t want you to hate me.”
“Rebecca I don’t hate you.” I think I was lying. “I’m too hurt to hate anyone. In my head I know it’s your fault. I know you are the reason Hailey is dead but I can’t bring her back.” That was mean.
“I would trade my life for hers if I could. You know that right?”
“I know.” I lied. Did I know that? I know I would die for Hailey but Rebecca was always a selfish woman. Would she give her life in exchange for anyone’s? I’m not too sure about that. I know she loved our daughter but her love was not as deep and centrally connected as mine. Hailey was my life. I had my moving company and my kid. Those were the only things I cared about. My family didn’t matter that much to me. Women didn’t matter to me. Hailey was all I cared about and Rebecca’s drunken stupidity took her from me.
“Luke, I’m dying in here.”
“What about the gun charge? Are they going to drop it?”
“I’m not sure. My lawyer is trying to work out a deal. The gun wasn’t mine so I hope that goes away but he told me the state’s attorney is cracking down on drunk drivers. The involuntary vehicular manslaughter charge is not going anywhere and the DUI is here to stay.”
“Has your husband come to visit you?”
“No, he won’t even let me talk to my kids.” Rebecca started wiping away the tears that had fallen from her red and puffy blue eyes. “I have to get out of here. I’ve been in here for five weeks. I need to see my kids.”
Rebecca has two other children. They were in the car when she was drinking and driving. Her four year old son broke his arm. Her six year old daughter only suffered a few scrapes and bruises but my daughter Hailey died. I should have never let her spend the weekend with Rebecca. Hailey wanted to see her half brother and sister. I trusted Rebecca with our daughter and now this has happened.
“Luke, my cousin Jo is collecting the money. If you can give anything to help me got out of here.”
“Jolene.” The cousin that I slept with in high school before I even knew Rebecca.
“Yeah.”
“I can come up with two thousand.”
“Thanks Luke, I will tell Jo to come pick it up.”
“That’s fine.”
After minutes of talking I decided to end the visit. Seeing Rebecca didn’t make things better. It made it worse. Hailey has her mother’s green eyes, her mouth and her strawberry blonde hair. God I miss my daughter.
I had received some good news earlier from another little green-eyed girl. I was already downtown so I decided to drop by Miss Nevels office. I had been deep inside this woman. I would drop the Miss Nevels and just call her Nicki from this point forward. I earned that right when I made her cum.
I knew where Nicki worked because Kelly had told me. I asked a lot of questions about her mother. Kelly was very forthcoming. Talking to Kelly about her mother and her life got my mind off the void in my house and the gaping void in my heart.
Nicki’s office building was downtown on Michigan Avenue. You could see Lake Michigan from the building. If her office faced the water she had a beautiful view to behold while working. I grappled through the sidewalk full of spiffy dressed business types. I entered the building and read the directory. I was looking for Crome and Foster. It was located on the twenty-third floor. I took the elevator up the twenty-three stories.
The young receptionist directed me to Nicki’s office. Of course she notified Nicki I was in the reception area. She could have met me in the reception area but I’m sure she wanted to show off. She wanted me to see her big fancy office.
The receptionist knocked twice and then opened the door for me to enter. I was in jeans and a t-shirt. I felt extremely underdressed but I didn’t really care. I had information to share with the boss lady.
Nicki was sitting behind a huge desk when I stepped in and gave it my once over. Her office was huge and warmly decorated. The view was just as spectacular as I imagined. Behind her desk was a picturesque view of Lake Shore Drive, Buckingham Fountain and Lake Michigan.
Nicki stood. “Thanks Gretchen.” Nicki clearly stated and smiled at the receptionist. She’s nice to others, go figure. Gretchen closed the door leaving me alone with the boss.
Nicki raised a suspicious eyebrow. “Why are you here?”
“I was in the neighborhood.”
“Yeah right? You just happened to be downtown Chicago.”
“Actually I was at Cook County jail.”
“Why does that not shock me, going to visit one of your outlaw relatives?”
“Yeah something like that.”
“So Mr. Hamilton--”
“So formal, I’ve seen you naked.” I strolled up to her desk. I planted myself in the middle of the two leather chairs placed in front of the desk. I wanted to remain standing. My height was my advantage. Nicki was powerful but I was too.
“So like I said earlier, why are you here?”
“I wanted
to see where the educated uptight snobs work?”
“Well Luke you didn’t have to enter the building for that. You could’ve just stood out on the sidewalk and looked up at the architecture.”
“But that wouldn’t be any fun.” I smirked. I like her disdain.
“Fun is for fools.”
“We had fun.” My eyes roamed her body as I recalled the hot garage sex, the bedroom sex and my cock pounding her hard from behind.
“No that wasn’t fun.”
“You’re right. That was a beating, a lesson in discipline.”
“Oh so I guess you call yourself disciplining me?”
“Well someone had to knock you off your high horse.”
“And that was you?”
“You know that was me.” I grinned and licked my lips.
“You are so arrogant.”
“I prefer the word cocky.”
“Oh God.” She rolled her eyes.
“Yeah that’s what you called me when I was inside you.” I winked. Nicki’s full lips drew into a seductive smile that she promptly removed.
“I’ve asked you why you are here. Did you think you were going to show up to my job and come in my office and have your way with me?”
“That depends on how short your skirt is. If I can get in quickly and get out quickly that might be possible.”
“Let’s get one thing straight. I only tolerate you because Kelly likes you. I don’t like you.”
“I don’t like you either. I’m not here for a rematch.” But I wouldn’t mind getting back inside her tight walls.
“Great because one round was enough to last a lifetime Mr. Hamilton.”
“I’m that good.” I couldn’t help the huge smile that formed on my face.
“No that was an exaggeration. Good enough to last maybe three months at the most.”
“Three months, Nicki did you just give me a compliment?”
“Fine, take it and roll out.” She placed a hand on her hip, such lovely hips.
“Stop trying to get rid of me.”
“I wish and pray that I could.”
“No you don’t really wish that.”
There was a knock on her closed office door that put an abrupt halt to our flirtatious banter. I turned and saw a black man in a business suit enter her office with a manila folder in his hands.
“Excuse me, Nicole I have the report you requested.” The black man was talking to her but staring at me. I gave him the same inspection he was giving me.
“Thanks James.” Nicki said as this James guy placed the folder on her desk. “James this is Lukas Hamilton.”
“A new client.” He added prying and fishing for more information than he deserved.
I looked him in the eye. “No, I’m Nicki’s nanny.” I was so straight-faced he had no choice but to believe me.
Nicki almost chuckled at my false admission and probably at the confused facial expression on her co-worker. It was pretty funny.
“Okay well Nicole we have a meeting in an hour.” James added with more bass in his voice than required.
“Yes James conference room three.” Nicki nodded.
“Okay Mr. Hamilton, nice to meet you.”
I didn’t feel the need to respond. I just nodded once. Fuck him. There’s no way she fucked this buttoned up lame. James exited the office and glared until we couldn’t see him any longer.
I didn’t speak until a heard the click of the door close. “Do you fuck him?”
“None of your business?”
“I know but I thought I would ask.” I was trying to be charming. I was failing miserably at being charming. “What time do you get home from work today?”
“Why?”
“I’m coming over to help Kelly with her science project.”
“No you’re not.” She raised her voice just a bit.
“I told her I wouldn’t step foot in your house until the video cameras were installed. She said the security cameras are up and running so--”
“The cameras are up but--”
“I told her I would come over.”
“You can’t just tell a kid, my kid anything without checking with their parent, me moron, I’m the parent.”
“Moron, that’s real professional. I’m telling you now. I haven’t seen Kelly in a week. She wants to hang out with me. If you can watch me while I’m in your house I feel better about it. I’m not going to sneak around behind your back to see your daughter. I’m telling you I’m coming over. I’m telling you I’m helping her with homework. I’m telling you I’m going to cook something other than those microwave dinners you poison her with.”
“See there’s the problem. You can’t tell me. You have to ask me.”
“No sweetheart your employees here have to ask your permission. I don’t have to ask you anything.”
“Kelly is my kid.”
“I know that.”
“It’s weird that you want to spend time with a kid that isn’t yours.”
“It’s not weird. She doesn’t have a father and I don’t have a dau….”
“You don’t have a daughter. Is that what you were going to say?” I couldn’t answer her question. She walked around her desk and she was standing close to me looking me right in my eyes. “Luke listen, I know your daughter died. I Googled you. I checked to see if you were on the sex offender’s registry. I even checked the Illinois Department of Corrections website. I’m not stupid.”
“I never said you were stupid. I think you’re very intelligent. This is not the office of a stupid woman. I know you got a Master’s from MIT. I did my homework on you too.”
“Okay this is just a lot to take in. I’m glad you saved my daughter from god knows what. I’m very sorry you were injured.”
“I was stabbed.”
“Cut.”
“Stabbed.”
“Whatever.” She tilted her head to the side. “I appreciate you not blowing Kelly off. I never lost a child before so I don’t understand what it feels like so I just--”
“Listen everything in life doesn’t have to have logic and reason. I will stay with Kelly until you get home. I will see you later.”
I left before she could protest or bicker with me any further. I still didn’t know why I went to her office. I didn’t know if I even liked her. Sure I sleep with her but I felt compelled to. Sure she’s attractive, more than attractive but she’s not my type. First she’s black. Second she’s not blonde. She’s too smart. She’s too classy and she’s a stuck-up bitch. I believe all those things but I can’t stop thinking about her. Was it the sex? Maybe but I was thinking about her before I took her. Jesus I need to just stop this shit. I blocked thoughts of her while I took the elevator down to the ground level. Then I realized that maybe it was better to think of her then to think of Hailey.
The traffic wasn’t that bad going back to the burbs. I had one stop to make and then I went right over to Nicki’s. Kelly let me in. There was an expensive security system installed. There were video cameras throughout the house.
Kelly sort of fibbed a little about the help she needed on her science project. She didn’t need any help at all. I was clear she was ten times smarter than me. I didn’t fully understand the entire project. I was terrible at science. I was more there for conversation.
Kelly left me to have a cell conversation with some girl from her American History class. I started dinner. I stopped off at the grocery store beforehand to grab some real food. I put on some tunes and turned the kitchen into my private sanctuary.
I was few minutes into my chef master class when the cordless phone on the wall by the refrigerator started ringing.
I read the caller ID. “Hello.” I answered the phone.
“I can’t believe you answered my phone.” Nicki’s voice bellowed loud and clear.
“Why not? I knew it was you. That’s what the caller ID said.”
“Read.” She corrected.
“Read, said, why are you calling?”
“I’m in the kitchen cooking dinner.”
“Where’s Kelly?”
“Look at the cameras.”
“I can’t look at the cameras when I’m driving that’s why I’m asking you.”
“You need to download the app to your phone. Then you can see inside the house when you’re driving.”
“I don’t have enough memory in my phone for that.” She huffed and puffed through the phone. She was constantly losing her patience with me. It was kind of cute.
“I’ll fix that when you get here. Kelly’s upstairs on the phone with some kid named Marie. The last thing I heard when I was eavesdropping was a debate on whether Justin Bieber was too old and so last year.”
“I will be there in about ten or fifteen minutes.”
“Drive safe, dinner will be ready in twenty.”
“Okay.”
“Okay.” She hung up and so did I.
Nicki arrived twenty-five minutes later. I served dinner shortly after she arrived. Kelly came down and we all eat in the kitchen. Instead of the adults making pleasant conversation we just let Kelly do most of the talking. We exchanged fake smiles and it was funny to both of us, being cordial to one another.
Kelly left as soon as she cleaned her plate. She left her mother sitting across from me.
“Luke, thank you for dinner. It was pretty tasty.” Another compliment, I should keep a tally. Nicki stood and removed the dishes from the table. She put them in the sink.
“Just leave the dishes. I will get them.” I made the mess. I could clean it up.
“No way, I can rinse them and put them in the dishwasher. You cooked. I appreciate it. There’s no way you have to do dishes.”
“It’s not a problem.”
“No I’m not going to let you.” Nicki grabbed her empty wine glass off the table.
I stood to join her at the sink. “Why are you so bossy?” I figured I would ask. There had to be a reason why she needed to exercise this excessive amount of control.
She turned from the sink and pressed her lips together. “Because I’m the boss.”
