For Henry and Emmett
—A. M. R.
Chapter One
Batter Up
“No, not the carrots!” my best friend Sadie said to the television. “Don’t add those to the cake batter! Yuck!”
My other best friend, Isabel, shrugged at the screen. “I like carrot cake,” she said.
“Yeah, but chocolate carrot cake?” Sadie said. “Blech. No thank you.” We watched as the kid contestants on The Batter-Up Bake-Off Show grated three large carrots into the mixing bowl and poured in a cupful of chocolate chunks. Sadie wrinkled her nose.
“I’d try it,” Isabel said. “What about you, Anna?”
“If Dad served it for dinner, I’d have to,” I said. That was the food rule at my house: You eat what you’re served, even if it’s beets or brussels sprouts.
“True, but you’re at my house now,” Sadie said. “There aren’t any rules like that here.” There weren’t any food rules at either of Sadie’s houses. Both of her parents let her eat what she likes. And here at her dad’s place, we’re allowed to watch as much TV as we want, too, although usually we’re busy with games or adventures.
Hanging out at my house is still the most fun though because there we get to be with my dog, Banana. But Banana doesn’t mind if I go to Sadie’s or Isabel’s, as long as I tell her all about it afterward.
“I’d still probably try it,” I said, “if only so I could tell Banana what it tastes like.”
Sadie shuddered. “Just let her taste it for herself!”
“Nope. Chocolate is really bad for dogs. Like, it’s basically poison,” I said. I was always super careful to keep chocolate out of Banana’s reach. Even the thought of her eating some made my heart skip with panic.
Isabel nodded. “Cats too,” she said. “We thought Mewsic maybe ate some once, and had to take him to the vet.” Mewsic is Isabel’s gigantic orange tabby cat. He’s even bigger than Banana.
“What did the vet do about it?” Sadie asked.
“She gave him some medicine to make him throw up,” Isabel said.
“Aw, poor kitty,” I said, trying not to picture it.
“Yeah, but at least then he was safe,” Isabel said. I couldn’t argue with that.
“Oooh!” Sadie grabbed the remote and turned up the volume. “This is my favorite part.”
It had been Sadie’s idea for us to watch TV today—she’d really wanted us to see this new baking show. “Batter up!” she cheered, along with the whole TV audience. On screen, the two teams of kid contestants stepped up to the judges’ plate to show off their final creations.
“Whoa, they sprinkled carrots on top of the frosting, too,” I said, as that team gave the “pitch” for why their recipe invention should win. “They’re really into this chocolate-carrot thing.”
Sadie stuck out her tongue. “Gross.”
“I like it,” Isabel said. “It looks like a Halloween cake.”
“Yeah, but Halloween is over.” Sadie leaned back into the couch where we were sitting. “I think the other team should win. Zucchini-walnut cookies sound much better, even though it’s still vegetables for dessert.”
“I’d at least give the carrot team points for creativity,” I said.
“Definitely,” Isabel agreed. But the judges agreed with Sadie. They awarded the golden chef’s cap to the other team.
“We should go on this show together,” Sadie said, clicking it off with the remote. “We’re a really good team.”
“But we don’t know how to bake!” Isabel said.
“So? We’ll learn.” Sadie tossed a throw pillow at me and I caught it. “I’m going to a cupcake- making party tomorrow after school, actually,” she said.
Isabel perked up. “You’re going to Monica’s birthday party? Me too!”
“Cool!” Sadie said. She and Isabel beamed at each other.
I looked back and forth between them, feeling suddenly left out. “Who’s Monica?” I asked. I didn’t know Sadie and Isabel had a friend in common who wasn’t me.
“A girl in Mr. Garrison’s class,” Sadie said. “I don’t know her all that well, but her mom and my dad work together, so that’s why I got invited.”
“I was friends with her last year in Ms. Lahiri’s class,” Isabel explained. “Before I met you guys.” Sadie and I had been friends forever, but we only met Isabel this school year. It already felt like we’d been friends with her forever too though.
“Oh. I think I know who that is,” I said. I could picture Monica’s short, curly hair and big brown eyes, but I wasn’t sure if I’d ever talked to her. Even though we were the same age, we had never been in the same class. Of course she hadn’t invited me to her birthday party—we didn’t even know each other. But it was weird that Sadie and Isabel would be going to the party without me. I couldn’t help feeling sad about that, but I tried not to show it. “A baking party sounds fun,” I said.
“I’m so glad you’ll be there,” Sadie said to Isabel. “I thought I wouldn’t know anyone.”
“I’ll sit next to you!” Isabel said. She turned to me. “Once we’re baking experts, we’ll teach you everything we know.”
“Yeah!” Sadie said.
I hugged the throw pillow to my chest and tried to ignore the lump in the back of my throat. It wasn’t anyone’s fault I was being left out—that was just the way it was. And it was only for one afternoon. Still, as my Nana would say, it was a bitter pill to swallow.
I forced myself to smile. “As long as you won’t be hiding any carrots in the cupcakes,” I said, and tossed the throw pillow back at Sadie.
Sadie laughed. “No way.”
Isabel held up her hand for a three-way pinky swear, and Sadie and I hooked our pinkies with hers. “Only sweets in our treats,” she said. “We promise.”
Chapter Two
A Spoonful of Envy
The next morning when I got to school, I spotted Isabel out on the playground, sitting on her favorite reading rock. She was so wrapped up in the story she was reading, she didn’t seem to notice me, even once I was standing right in front of her.
“Ahem,” I said to get her attention.
Isabel’s shoulders jumped with surprise and she looked up from the book in her lap. “Hi!” she said, a smile spreading across her face. “You would really like this book, I think. It’s about a girl and her cow, but there’s also a dog in it.” She showed me the cover. It looked pretty good.
“What’s the cow’s name?” I asked.
“Daisy,” she answered, scooting over to make room for me on the rock.
I plopped down beside her. “I knew it! I feel like every cow in a book is named Daisy.”
“Maybe it’s, like, a rule or something,” she said. “What would you name your cow?”
“Hmm.” I thought about it. “Maybe Milkshake?”
“I’d name mine Moooooon,” she said. We laughed.
I looked around the playground. “The buses are all here now. So where’s Sadie?”
Isabel looked too. “Uh-oh. I hope she isn’t sick today. She’d be sad to miss out on the cupcake party.”
“Yeah,” I said, “that would be too bad.” Just because I would be missing out on the fun didn’t mean I wanted Sadie to miss it too.
“What would be too bad?” asked a familiar voice behind us. We turned and there was Sadie, looking not-at-all-sick after all. My worry floated away.
“We thought you might be absent and miss the party,” Isabel explained.
“Nope!” Sadie said. “My dad dropped me off so I wouldn’t have to carry Monica’s present on the bus. I didn’t want the ribbon to get crushed
in my backpack.”
I looked down and saw she was holding a medium-size box wrapped in shiny, colorful paper, with an enormous purple bow on top. Whatever the present was, it looked really fancy. Sadie placed it on the ground next to Isabel’s and my backpacks, and shrugged off her own. I noticed she was wearing a special outfit—rainbow-striped leggings and a top covered with cupcakes.
Jealousy poked at my insides. They were going to have so much fun at the party without me.
“What did you get her?” Isabel asked.
“A Rainbow Loom,” Sadie said. “She can use it to make bracelets and key chains and stuff.” The jealousy poked harder. I had always wanted one of those.
“I got her a book. It’s the new Whatever After,” Isabel said.
I looked down at my feet. I love that series. But it wasn’t my birthday. Of course the presents weren’t for me.
“Hey, guess what happened at breakfast this morning?” I said to change the subject. My friends both turned to listen. “Dad got so distracted thinking about the story he’s writing, he poured orange juice into his coffee instead of milk!”
“Yuck!” Sadie said. “That sounds even worse than carrots in chocolate frosting.”
“Yup. He took a sip before he noticed, and spit it right back out in the sink,” I said. I smiled, remembering the surprised expression on Banana’s face and the grossed-out one on Dad’s. “Chuck said he’d pay me five bucks to drink it, but I said no way. I don’t think he has five dollars, anyway.” My brother always spends his allowance as soon as he’s earned it. I was saving mine up to buy something special, but kept changing my mind about what the something special should be.
“Good call,” Isabel told me.
Sadie squinted. “I wonder what kind of cupcakes we’ll make at the party,” she said. “I hope there’s strawberry frosting.” And just like that, they went back to talking about things that didn’t include me.
I’d never been so glad to hear the first bell ring.
Chapter Three
Thumbs Up, Thumbs Down
When we got to our classroom, Sadie tucked the present into her cubbyhole and we settled at our desks as our teacher, Ms. Burland, clapped twice to start the day. I took out my pencils and lined them up at the top of my desk—first the regular yellow pencil I use for regular things, then the lucky blue pencil I use for spelling tests and quizzes, and finally the supersparkly rainbow pencil that’s so special, I barely use it for anything at all. The supersparkly rainbow pencil always makes me happy when I look at it, and this morning was no exception. As I placed it on my desk, it glinted in the light and I instantly felt much better.
My mood improved even more when Ms. Burland handed back our math tests. Her shiny yellow shoes with black soles and black laces—the ones Banana and I call her bumblebee shoes—clicked on the floor as she walked between the rows of desks. When she reached mine, she said, “Nice job, Anna,” and placed my test down. The grade at the top said 100. I glanced over at Isabel in the seat next to mine. She beamed back and gave me a thumbs-up.
Even the word of the day seemed determined to lift my spirits. The word was “buoyant,” which Ms. Burland pronounced like “boy-unt.” It means “able to float” but also “cheerful and optimistic.” I definitely felt more buoyant when I saw that.
I love the word of the day. It’s one of the coolest things about being in Ms. Burland’s class. We don’t have to memorize it for a test or anything like that. Ms. Burland just writes it on the whiteboard for fun. I always tell Banana the day’s word after school, and she perks up her ears for her favorites. I bet she would lift them extra high for this one.
I was still feeling good when the final bell rang to signal the end of the school day. But as I waited out front for Chuck to stop being a slowpoke so we could walk home together like usual, I watched Sadie and Isabel board the school bus with Monica and her other friends. They were smiling and laughing, holding presents and permission slips, and suddenly I didn’t feel quite so buoyant.
Isabel turned at the bus door and gave me a quick wave. I waved back, but my mood had already sunk like a pebble tossed in a mud puddle.
Being left out was no fun at all.
Chapter Four
Never Have I Ever
Chuck finally came outside just as the bus with my friends on it drove away. “There you are! Yeesh. About time,” he said, as if I were the one who’d been making him wait.
“Ha ha, very funny,” I said. He grinned at his own joke and took off down the sidewalk. I followed. We were walking the opposite way from where the bus had gone, but at least each step brought me closer to Banana. “What took you so long, anyway?” I asked my brother.
“I was finishing a chess game. Claudia kicked my butt,” he said. He was still grinning though. Chuck was a surprisingly good loser. He never seemed to take things personally. I wondered where he’d gotten that talent. It was one I wished I had.
“Mr. Snyder lets you play games during school?” Sixth grade sounded awesome.
Chuck shook his head. “We had a sub, and I finished my science test early,” he explained.
“Oh.” We kept walking and I wondered what Sadie and Isabel were talking about on the bus ride to the party, and how long it would take them to get there. I wondered if they wished I were there with them or if they were having so much fun they’d forgotten me.
“Have you ever felt left out? Like everyone else was having fun without you?” I asked Chuck.
“Nope! Never,” he said, and for a second I almost believed him. “Bleep bleep bloop,” he said, switching into a robot voice, and then I knew for sure he’d been teasing. “Does not com-pute.” His body went stiff and he jerked back and forth as though his parts were made of metal. “Chuckle-bot 362SO does not feel hu-man e-mo-tions,” he said, and I couldn’t help but giggle.
Maybe Chuck was on to something. “Bleepity blop blop bloop,” I said. I imagined my insides were filled with wheels and gears, like an old-fashioned clock. If I were made of metal, nothing could make me feel bad. That sounded pretty good right now. “What are hu-man e-mo-tions?” Robot-Anna asked.
“Bzzzzzzt! Brrrrrrrp! Bleeeeep!” Robot-Chuck whirred back. “Error! Error! File not found.”
I pushed at the imaginary buttons on my stomach and followed my robot-brother home.
Chapter Five
Sweet and Sour
When we got to our house, Chuck and I powered out of robot mode and turned back into regular kids as we walked in the front door. Banana was right there waiting for me, like usual. She danced at our feet and barked hello, excited to see us. I crouched down to greet her with a kiss on the snout. Even a robot would be happy to see Banana. But I was glad to be human again so I could really feel her love.
Banana spun in a circle and made hopeful eyes at her leash, which was hanging on its hook by the door. I knew she wanted me to take her on a walk—or better yet, an adventure. Banana’s favorite adventure these days was visiting our neighbor, Mrs. Shirley, and her new kitten, Surely Cat.
I liked visiting Mrs. Shirley and Surely Cat too. Banana and the kitten were slowly learning to get along, and it was fun watching them figure it out. Sometimes Banana still got too eager and Surely Cat swiped her on the nose or hid where Banana couldn’t reach him, but other times they both were happy to play chase or share a nap in an afternoon sunbeam. Mrs. Shirley was teaching me to play her favorite card games, and she almost always had cookies to share. Visiting my neighbor wasn’t as special as decorating cupcakes at a birthday party, but it would still be fun.
I clipped on Banana’s leash and called out, “We’re going to Mrs. Shirley’s!” and Banana and I set off down the block.
When we got to Mrs. Shirley’s house, we stood on the doorstep and rang the buzzer again and again, but nobody answered. Mrs. Shirley wasn’t home.
Banana’s ears drooped with disappointment as I led her away from the house. She’d really been looking forward to playing with her friend. “I know e
xactly how you feel,” I told her. “I’m sorry.” But there was nothing I could do to fix it.
Banana and I circled the rest of the way around the block until we found ourselves back home. I let us in the front door, feeling like my ears were drooping too.
“Back already?” Dad called from another room. “That was quick.”
Banana and I followed the sound of his voice into the kitchen, where Dad was pouring more coffee into his TOP DOG mug. “Mrs. Shirley isn’t home?” he guessed.
“Nope.” I slid into a chair at the kitchen table and rested my chin in my hands. Banana laid down at my feet and heaved a big sigh. She sounded just as mopey as I felt. I wondered if maybe I should go back to being a robot after all.
Dad lifted his eyebrows at us. “Bummer, huh?”
I shrugged.
“I suppose there isn’t any fun to be had around here,” he said. “No books to read, no games to play. Definitely no homework to do.”
I twisted my mouth in response to his teasing. “At Mrs. Shirley’s house there are cookies,” I said.
“Oh.” Dad took a sip from his mug. “Well, we don’t have any cookies here.”
I slumped down farther in my seat. Dad wasn’t helping.
“We could make some though,” he added.
I lifted my head. “We could?” I asked. Banana sat up and perked her ears.
“Sure,” he said.
I jumped out of my chair and yelled, “Batter up!”
Chapter Six
Snickerdoo, Snickerdee
“All right,” Dad said. “Step one in any baking project is to wash your hands thoroughly.”
I ran to the sink and reached for the soap. Banana didn’t have to wash her paws since she wouldn’t be touching the food, but she ran to the sink alongside me, not wanting to miss out on the action. I dried my hands on a towel and Banana looked up at Dad as if to ask, What’s next?
Anna, Banana, and the Recipe for Disaster Page 1