Oriental Impressions is a symmetrical triangle where a center line separates two identical sides that are a pattern of squares, triangles, and eyelets. When I looked at the sample shawl on the pattern page, it looked like the winding path my friendship with Sue has taken, complete with walking together, then away, then reconverging. A large area of eyelets seemed to indicate the time of only spotty contact and then a lovely border that looked like the eye of a peacock’s feather—something I’ve always associated with happiness and beauty.
Pattern decided, I needed to make a decision on color and fiber. By this time Sue had sent me a link to the picture of her dress so I knew she was wearing a sea green sleeveless dress for this second wedding. I knew I wanted something that would coordinate but I didn’t want to take the chance of clashing or being “close enough but not quite.” I also wanted something warm and luscious and not too heavy. Something that would enfold and embrace my friend but not weigh her down or seem too oppressive. A friend at work had done a large lace piece in Jagger Spun’s Zephyr yarn—a lace-weight wool-silk blend—and I loved the feel of it, so I chose a lovely vanilla color of the same yarn for Sue’s shawl.
By the time I got my supplies, the wedding had been moved up to Beltane (May 1) to accommodate other obligations. I cast on with size 2 needles (little!) and started knitting. I’m relatively new to lace and this is finer yarn than I’ve used before so I can’t multitask while knitting Sue’s shawl. I have to keep my attention on the work or I either miscount or drop a stitch. Because I have cats who love yarn and want to be on me all the time, I can’t work on it downstairs where the TV is. Instead this shawl is being knit in my bedroom with my full attention.
Every stitch is accompanied by thoughts of our friendship, memories of times we’ve shared, and wishes and dreams I have for Sue’s future. There are moments of intense concentration when I have a tricky series of stitches mixed with coasting along on the return row of only purl stitches. It reminds me of the give-and-take of a friendship—times of complexity and working to feed the friendship alternating with being fed by it. Through it all, the yarn is unbroken. There are no knots or joins; it’s all one long, long thread that ties us together.
Right now I’m about halfway through the pattern and am working at it every night to get it done on time. There are a few flaws—I miscounted once or twice—but none of these are horrible or ugly. I thought about ripping back and fixing them but I decided not to. This wedding shawl is not about perfection or illusions of infallibility. I’m flawed, Sue is flawed, our relationship has had flaws and bumps; so it’s right that her wedding shawl should keep the flaws it has, despite my care and attention.
Even tears have touched this shawl. Several times I’ve had memories move me to tears and a few have fallen on the yarn. I left them there to soak in and dry. What friendship has no tears?
I want Sue to be able to wrap this shawl around her and think of the love that went into making it. It can warm her when she’s cold, touch her softly when she’s fragile, hug her when she needs a hug, and be a visible symbol of the beauty that emerges from years of friendship, even though the whole was never without flaws, wounds, and scars.
I already have a card made to go with it that says:
Sue,
My arms to hold you,
My heart to love you,
My friendship to sustain you,
My energy to fuel your dreams,
May beauty surround you, always.
Blessed be on your wedding day,
Maura.
MAURA ANDERSON is a published technical writer by day and an e-published fiction writer by night, at least when her time isn’t spent reading, knitting, making jewelry, or being a wife and mother. She’s lived on the beautiful Puget Sound for the last fifteen years along with her husband, youngest son, and a herd of various rescued animals. She recently translated her lifelong love of storytelling into writing and works in a variety of romance subgenres; currently she is working on an urban fantasy/ steampunk novel based in an alternative Egypt. Every day is filled with new ideas and new challenges. You can read more about Maura and her current projects on her website at http://www.realmsoftheraven.com.
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