Teresa shook her head. “Nothing. Although, I haven’t had much chance to talk with him. John Peterson said Drew is understandably having a rough time and that he’s blocked out most of what happened that night. He doesn’t want to grill Drew about what happened to his mother.”
Mac gave a heavy sigh. “Then I think that’s about as close to a clear picture of what happened here New Year’s Eve as anyone is going to get.”
Dennis looked at Teresa’s face. Disappointment clouded her expression. She’d clearly wanted some answers, and today’s trek to the bridge hadn’t provided any. It had only brought on more questions.
For Dennis, it had brought home something far more important. He didn’t want to see anyone die. But the circumstances being what they were it could have easily been far worse for Benny, Karen and Frank if Benny’s car had slid just a few feet over and ended up in the water as Molly’s Bronco had. Dennis closed his eyes at the thought. His sister was so fragile right now. He couldn’t imagine how she would have survived losing her son completely.
As if sensing his distress, Teresa placed a gentle hand on his arm. That one small move did wonders to dispel the anxiety building up inside him over what could have been. Right now Teresa could be a comfort to him and he’d take whatever comfort he could get. He only hoped he wouldn’t feel an empty hole in his heart when she finally left Stockington Falls. It made him determined to find a way to make her stay.
Chapter Twelve
“How’s the smell in the cottage?”
As she walked by one of the rooms, Teresa turned and saw Carlos standing by the nurses’ station, chuckling.
“It’s almost gone,” Teresa said with a smile. “I have to say that I’m going to miss that woodsy smell when I leave here.”
“Oh, don’t tell me you’re leaving us already,” Carlos said.
Cammie, who was seated at the nurses’ station, looked up from her paperwork but said nothing.
Teresa’s shoulder’s drooped. “This was only a temporary situation for me. But don’t worry, I’ll still be around for another month. Stockington Falls won’t get rid of me that easy.”
“If I had my way, you wouldn’t be leaving at all,” Dennis said, coming up to the nurses’ station with Allie Pryor in tow. He dwarfed her as she sat in the wheelchair.
“I see your ride is here to pick you up,” he said to Allie.
“Yes, thanks, Dr. Harrington. My brother is going to be at my house in a few hours, so Carlos and his wife will watch over me until then.”
“Good. Let me know if you experience any unusual pain.”
“You mean other than Carlos and my brother’s ribbing?”
Carlos made a comical face. “You secretly love me.”
“I don’t know how Brenda puts up with you,” she said, laughing.
“It’s my Latin charm. Speaking of Brenda, she’s making your favorite stew. Remind me to pick up some bread on the way home.”
Teresa smiled and turned to Allie. “You take care, and if you need anything or just want to talk, please call me.”
“I will. Thank you, Teresa.”
Teresa walked out of the room and down the hall toward her office. Her office. With every step she took, it gave her a sense that permanency was cementing her feet in Stockington Falls. She couldn’t deny that the people of the community had managed to wrap themselves around her heart. One person in particular.
She sighed as she walked into her office and closed the door. As she sat down at her desk, bare from all the little knickknacks and pictures she had in her office at the school in Hartford, she tried to remember how many of the neighbors she knew in her condo back home. Not many. Mrs. Dowling across the hall was someone she exchanged pleasantries with on occasion when they happened to be coming or going at the same time. She knew faces of the people who lived on the first floor, but none of their names.
It seemed odd to her now that she knew so many people in Stockington Falls after such a short period of time when she knew very few in the very building she’d lived in for four years.
Dragging a deep breath of air into her lungs, she suddenly felt claustrophobic. She needed to get out so she grabbed her purse and her jacket. After closing her office door, she walked the length of the hall to the front door. What stopped her escape completely was Cammie.
“Dennis said you wanted to talk to me, Teresa,” Cammie said as she started to walk by.
“Ah, yes. Yes, I do.”
She looked back at the office door she’d just locked securely.
“Would right now work for you? I just need to take her out to the car and then I can meet with you.” Teresa nodded.
“Sure. I’ll be in my office.”
What was she running from anyway? She couldn’t help feel that the Lord had put her here in Stockington Falls at this point in her life for a reason. As she unlocked her office door again and dropped her purse on the desk, she decided she was being foolish.
A knock on her door had her lifting her head. It was Dennis.
“I saw you breeze by my office with your coat on. You’re still coming to the community center with me this afternoon, aren’t you?”
She’d forgotten. She forced a smile. “Yes, I’ll be there. I wouldn’t miss it, but I’m going to chat with Cammie first.”
Dennis smiled and nodded. “Good. I’ll see you later then.”
“Okay.”
Teresa barely had enough time to hang up her jacket back up on the coat hook and sit down when Cammie walked through the door and sat down in the seat opposite the desk.
“I keep telling Dennis these chairs are the most uncomfortable things in the world. I think he ordered them at a going-out-of-business sale.” Cammie laughed. Then her shoulders lifted and sagged on a heavy sigh. “So, what is it that you want to talk to me about?”
“How are you doing?” Teresa asked.
Cammie stiffened. “Fine. As well as anyone can do.”
“Molly was your best friend from, what, kindergarten or first grade?”
“Actually, I think it was before that. Our mothers knew each other before we were even born. Why do you ask?”
“You knew Molly very well. I’m guessing you also know her husband, John, and Drew.”
“They’re family to me.”
“Look, I don’t want to cause you any pain, and you don’t have to talk about anything you don’t want to talk about.”
“I appreciate that. So what is it that you do want to know?”
It was clear by Cammie’s impatient tone that she wanted the conversation over with as quickly as possible. Teresa cut to the chase.
“Can you tell me about Molly and how she was as a mother?”
Cammie’s smile was bittersweet. “She was the best. She loved Drew so much. She and John had a hard time conceiving, so when she finally got pregnant with Drew she called him her special gift from God. And he was. He’s a wonderful little boy. She’d do—did—anything for him.”
“And John?”
Cammie’s face changed. “You’ll have to talk to him.”
Curious, Teresa asked, “Why? Are you uncomfortable talking about John?”
“No. Like I said, he’s like family. But if you want to know about how things were going with John and Molly, you’ll have to talk with him directly. I won’t gossip—especially since Molly is not here to tell her side.”
Her interest piqued, Teresa leaned back in her chair.
“I wasn’t asking about whether they were getting along. I wanted to know about him as a father, for Drew’s sake now that Molly is gone.”
Cammie’s face showed surprise and remorse at her admission. “Oh, I thought you were asking about the rumors.”
Teresa was surprised to hear that there were rumors going around about the Petersons’ marriage—but that really wasn’t the information she needed here. She was a child psychologist, not a marriage counselor. Drew’s well-being was her concern. “No, I had no idea. It’s none of my business unles
s it has to do with what I’m working on here. I share your sentiment. Gossip isn’t something I’m fond of.”
Guilt clouded Cammie’s eyes, and she looked away.
“You haven’t broken any confidences, Cammie. Everything you tell me is confidential.”
Tears welled up in Cammie’s eyes. “Why is all this important? John is a great father. I know he’ll take care of Drew and love him. If Drew needs anything, John would move a mountain to get it for him. He’s not like Frank Dulton.”
Teresa broached the subject as delicately as she could. “Mac doesn’t think that Drew had his seat belt on in the Bronco the night of the accident.”
Cammie shook her head vehemently. “Impossible. Molly would never allow him in the car without the seat belt. She always made sure Drew was secured in. She used to sit in the backseat of the car with Drew when he was an infant when John was driving so she could see Drew’s face when he was too small to ride in a car seat facing front. She just wouldn’t drive without him buckled in.”
“Mac thinks he was thrown from the car.”
“He told me as much.” Cammie’s lips thinned. “This time Mac is wrong.”
“How can you be so sure?”
“I told him the same thing that I’m telling you. There has to be another explanation of how Drew got out of the car. The injury to his arm could have happened any number of ways. He could have unbelted himself and fell, then climbed out of the car on his own.”
Teresa shook her head. “But his clothes weren’t wet, were they? Do you remember him being wet when he was brought in that night?”
She thought a second, rubbing her temple with her fingers. “No. He was cold but not wet. I would have remembered that. Hypothermia would have been the first thing I checked. But again, what you’re implying is impossible. There’s no way Molly would have had Drew in the car with her if he wasn’t belted in—especially on a night like New Year’s Eve. The weather was horrible. Molly hated driving in the snow.”
“That brings me to New Year’s Eve. What was she doing up on the mountain without John? You’d think that on New Year’s Eve of all nights she’d be with her husband. But Dennis said you called John at home after Molly and Drew were brought in. They lived on the other side of Stockington Falls, just down the road from Dennis. Dennis said she was briefly at the party.”
With a controlled breath, Cammie said, “I told you. You’ll have to talk to John about that.” Cammie stood. “Teresa, it’s only been a few days since I buried the best friend I’ve ever had. I’m not sure I’m ever going to get over losing Molly. So as you can imagine these past few weeks have been very hard.”
“I can. And I’m sorry I’m putting you through all this. I’m just trying to piece together the accident so I can help Benny and Drew.”
She nodded. “I understand. But I really can’t help you anymore. I’m sorry.”
Cammie made her way to the door and then paused as if she was thinking back to the past. “Did you ask Benny how he got so wet?”
“Benny?” Teresa repeated. “Yes, he said he was looking for Chuck in the snow after he’d been thrown from the car. Benny didn’t know which direction Chuck had gone. He was a little disoriented. The tree he hit was on the other side of the river. He said he searched for Chuck around the bank of the river until the heat from the burning Bronco became too hot. Then he found Chuck several yards away against another tree.”
“Are you sure? You may want to ask him again.” And then Cammie strode through the office door.
Teresa rose from her chair, but Cammie was already gone. Within seconds, Dennis was at her door, his face etched with worry.
“She looks really upset.”
“She’ll be fine,” Teresa said quietly. “In time.”
She wanted to believe that was true. She only wished she could convince herself of it.
“I’m almost done here. Do you want to drive over to the community center together?” Dennis asked.
“No,” she said quietly. “I have an important stop I need to make before I go.”
And it was a stop that was long overdue. She only hoped that she was ready.
Teresa had passed the church in town many times since she’d been in Stockington Falls. Something deep inside had always pulled her eyes toward it as she drove by, but she never stopped. Today was different. With the community center located right next door, it seemed like it was time. She felt as though she was in a stalemate where Benny was concerned. She needed clarity and there had never been a place that had helped her get clarity more than church.
It had been over two months since Teresa had sat inside any church. Her faith in God had always been strong growing up. She knew she didn’t have to be inside a church to feel God’s love and presence in her life. He’d hear her prayer wherever she was. Still, it had taken Teresa this long to take her first step back.
The congregational church set close to the road near the community center was tiny in comparison to Teresa’s church back in Hartford. The tall white steeple wasn’t made of granite or marble. It was constructed of wooden planks and beams. The front door was small but inviting. Simple and functional. There was nothing but comfort inside those walls, Teresa told herself as she made her way up the steps.
Then why do I feel so scared?
She had nothing to fear here. And yet, as Teresa touched the front door and began to open it, she wrenched her hand back. And then the reason hit her. Although she knew the Lord would always be there for her, since Mariah’s death Teresa hadn’t felt worthy of His love. She didn’t feel worthy enough to sit in His home.
She’d failed Him when she’d failed Mariah. And until she made that right, it would always pain her to call on His grace.
Her heart ached just thinking about it. But the realization that those were her thoughts alone became glaringly obvious to her as she stepped through the doors and walked inside. None of the judgment she feared met her here. Only love. The church was empty, yet she felt an overwhelming amount of love wrap around her.
She’d been wrong to stay away for so long. It was she alone who’d been judging her wrongs, not the Lord. It was only in seeing how harshly Benny judged himself that she realized the error of her own ways.
As she took a seat midway up the aisle and settled back, her eyes filled with tears. The Lord didn’t judge the way she did. He was forgiving. It was time she stopped beating herself up and instead remembered the good she’d been able to do in the past.
She’d made a mistake. And it was a big one. If this was anyone else, she’d be telling them to accept the failure, learn from it and move on. If God could forgive her, if she could sit in His home and feel His love and grace surrounding her, then she owed it to herself and Mariah to get herself back on track. And even if she never counseled another child when she finally left Stockington Falls, she owed it to Benny to use the gift God had given her to help him heal.
Chapter Thirteen
Teresa let the cold air seep through her jacket as she walked over from the church parking lot to the community center. The sun had felt nice on her face earlier, but as the sun set, the temperature dropped and the wind that had been calm chilled her to the bone.
After her visit to the church, she’d sat in her car and had a good cry. She’d needed the release and was glad there was no one around to see her breakdown. Especially Dennis. The last thing she wanted was for him to add worrying about her onto his already-troubled shoulders. Benny and his sister’s troubles were enough.
The distraction of the activity in the community center would be good for her, she reasoned. Located close to the church in Stockington Falls, the community center was a far cry from the one she was used to visiting in Hartford. The most striking difference was that it was more inviting, despite its smaller size.
As she opened the door, the sound of teenagers’ chatter, laughter and life drew her in and immediately lifted her mood. The number of teenagers at the center was also telling.
I
t amazed Teresa there were about the same number of kids here that she’d see on a normal afternoon in Hartford, yet Stockington Falls had a fraction of the population.
Someone was doing something right by getting these kids involved. Teresa couldn’t help but wonder why Benny wasn’t responding to such a positive program. Was it just the friction between him and his father?
“I was beginning to think you weren’t going to come. I’m glad you made it though,” Dennis said, bouncing a basketball from one hand to the next as he came toward her. “We were just getting ready to get started.”
“I got a little hung up. Has Benny showed?”
“He’s in the locker room changing into sweats.” Looking at her intently, Dennis asked, “What is it?”
“Just a thought. There are so many kids here. I’m wondering how the center manages to fill this place.”
“Pastor Balinski promotes the center pretty regularly during services, and he does a lot to get the kids motivated to come. They hold dances here every other Saturday. It keeps most of the kids occupied.”
“Was there a dance here on New Year’s Eve?”
“Yes, Benny was here when Chuck called him for a ride.” She nodded.
Dennis continued. “It helps that the center is walking distance from the high school, too. The location does make it easier for kids to get here and for parents to pick kids up on their way home from work.”
The sound of bouncing baskets from the other teenagers as they practiced their hand at sinking hoops jarred her. “Does the high school team play here, too?”
“No, they have their own gym. Here we play strictly for fun. No set teams and no hard-and-fast rules.” He made a quick turn to survey the gym. “If we have a big crowd like today we split into teams. But sometimes there are only a few kids, and I lead them in a little one-on-one.”
“What about Benny? Is he up to playing?”
Dennis shook his head. “I already talked to him about his limitations for now. He can shoot some baskets but only if it doesn’t hurt too much to raise his arms. I’m sure his arm is still a little stiff, so working the muscles will be good. It’s really too soon for him to be running on the court with the rest of the group. I don’t want to risk him getting injured further while he’s still healing that shoulder.”
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