Broken Butterfly

by Cindy Patterson

  “Why not? Besides, you have to now. You’ve gotten my hopes up. I promise you’ll have fun. It would be a good chance for you to meet everyone.” Rachel parked and turned to face her. “I’m so glad God put you in my life.”

  How could Mallory say no? She couldn’t imagine acting in front of anyone, that had been a young girl’s dream, but she could at least go to the practice.

  She changed into a pair of shorts and a tank top and followed Rachel outside. They started off at a brisk pace as Rachel talked more about the team until they started to jog. Mallory had been running with Rachel for a few weeks now and enjoyed the scenery of Paradise. Dark, green plants or tall rows of corn filled endless acres as far as she could see. The humming of tractors in nearby fields helped Mallory get lost in her thoughts as her heart rate, now doubled, fell into a steady rhythm. Amish men and women drove by slowly staring straight ahead as they paid attention to oncoming traffic.

  Mallory had never imagined a place could be so peaceful, so serene. She found herself praying as she ran a few feet behind Rachel. Had God intended this for her? Had this been his plan all along?

  Eric met Paul to go fishing in the creek behind Rachel’s house. Paul drove onto the long path that led into Rachel’s yard leading to the beautiful farm house. Eric climbed from the truck, startled at the sound of footsteps behind him. He turned to find Rachel coming down the gravel trail. An intense thrill washed over him when he realized Mallory was behind her.

  Rachel noticed them first and slowed her pace, Mallory still behind her. Mallory glanced at Paul’s truck before her gaze met his and then looked quickly away. Rachel stopped in front of them. Mallory took a deep breath, her face red, her bare neck glimmering with sweat. He tried not to stare, but couldn’t help himself.

  “Are you guys going fishing?” Rachel propped her hands on her knees as Paul lifted the fishing poles from his truck.

  He wanted to talk to Mallory, to stay near her, but could think of nothing to say. His mind seemed to lose all rational thought. When he didn’t speak, Mallory moved past him. Rachel gave Eric a strange glance and followed Mallory inside.

  Eric and Paul crossed the bridge, setting their fishing gear in the thick, grassy meadow. Ten minutes later, their lines were floating along the creek. Eric stared into the water.

  Paul stretched out his legs. “We should’ve invited the girls to come with us, because your mind’s still back there with one of them.”

  Eric elbowed him. “What’s wrong with me? I can’t stop thinking about her. It’s like she’s hypnotized me. But, I don’t know what to say to her.”

  Paul laughed. “I knew something was turning in that brain of yours. You’ve got it pretty bad, huh? Did you talk to Victoria today?”

  “No, she said she had to be somewhere and left before I could.”

  “So, that’s why you didn’t speak to Mallory. You don’t feel free to ask her out yet?”

  “I think it’s too late for that. Andrew seems to have already staked his claim.”

  “Mallory would’ve said something to Rachel by now. Don’t give up. God has a way of working these things out.”

  Paul’s words eased Eric’s troubled mind. Was he capable of giving up on the idea of Mallory? If only he could figure out how to act normal around her. He’d never wished to be like someone else, but this very moment he found himself wishing he could be like Andrew.

  On Sunday, Eric searched the fourth pew for Mallory and made the decision to sit in the back again. He needed to be careful. If he sat anywhere near her, he would be distracted. He would want to talk to her, or worse sit beside her, but he was certain Andrew would take that seat.

  “Hi, can I sit here?”

  Sixteen

  “Victoria? What’re you doing here?” Eric winced. What if Mallory saw her here with him after the way she treated her?

  “I’m coming to church, silly. If I kept waiting for you to invite me, I’d never come. I decided to surprise you.” Victoria scooted in beside him and slipped one foot beneath his leg. Crossing his arms, he shifted giving her more room.

  During the welcome song, Eric stood and moved his Bible putting distance between them. Today, Andrew wasn’t next to Mallory, he sat a few seats down and Eric’s thoughts raced with questions. Were they arguing? Were they even dating? The preacher paced the platform, his voice strong—his gaze reaching through the audience. Catching some of the preacher’s firm lessons, he noted them in his heart.

  “We have to choose to heal. When we do what the Great Physician asks of us, to forgive those who’ve hurt us, a change will begin. God will bring us strength and wholeness.”

  Eric’s eyes wondered every few minutes toward the golden-brown hair spilling over the pew. His concentration was torn between Mallory and the girl sitting next to him.

  After the service, he escorted Victoria from the church as quickly as he could. Scanning over his shoulder as members exited the building, he followed Victoria to the car.

  Eric faced her when they reached her car. “Victoria, we have to talk.”

  She opened the door. “Do you want to climb in?”

  He took a full breath. “No, that’s okay. Listen, Victoria, I just want to be friends.”

  “Eric, that’s all we are. You didn’t think I wanted more did you?”

  He stared at her, unsure how to respond. “I don’t know. I thought …”

  “I like you a lot and enjoy hanging out with you, but I’m not ready to get serious or anything yet. You understand, right?”

  “Of course.” Exhaling, he placed a hand on the car. That had been easier than he’d thought.

  “Don’t be upset. I still want to hang out … we can do something this weekend.” Victoria embraced him, easing closer. “The last thing I ever wanted was to hurt you.” Moving back, she locked her gaze on his lips. He pulled away, his mind racing. She climbed in her car and winked before she backed out of the parking space.

  After the church services and a quick bite, Mallory rode with Rachel to the auditorium. The sun blazed through the open convertible top, stinging Mallory’s shoulders. Raising her jacket over her arms, she shielded the hot rays. “Maybe I shouldn’t do this. I don’t know anyone.”

  Rachel pulled into the full parking lot. “Sure you do. Me, Andrew, Kelli, we’re all in the drama group. You’ll have a blast.”

  Mallory made a mental note—Rachel hadn’t mentioned Eric and she exhaled a relieved sigh. After seeing Eric exit through the back of the sanctuary with Victoria, she was unable to look away when they stood together at her car. She determined to forget about him.

  After all, he and Victoria were engaged. The underlying disappointment welling in her chest fluttered in a different direction when she spotted him standing across the auditorium. He hadn’t seen her yet, and she thought of changing her mind when Andrew yelled her name.

  “Mallory, you’re here.” Andrew lifted her from the floor and spun her around.

  Heat rose to her cheeks. “Put me down. You’re embarrassing me.”

  “Yeah, right. Come on.” He guided her to a group standing in the center of the room.

  After introducing her to everyone, Andrew led her to the refreshment table. “Do you want something to eat.”

  “I’m not hungry. We just had lunch.”

  “Come on, they have your favorite ... white chocolate macadamia nut. You won’t be able to resist their white, gooey goodness.” Andrew waved a cookie in her face.

  “Okay, okay … but quit acting so crazy.” Eric was in the same room and hot blood raced through her veins. “I’ll never eat all those.”

  “We’ll share.” Andrew handed her the plate topped with three big cookies. “Hey, I’ll be right back.”

  Her stomach plummeted. Feeling out of place, she turned, hoping to find a corner, but Eric stood behind her. Her fingers trembled beneath the pl
ate of cookies.

  He took it before it tumbled to the floor. “Did you want to sit down and eat?”

  “I’m not hungry.”

  Eric’s lips curved into a smooth smile and deepened his tiny dimple.

  “I guess that sounded silly since I’m holding a plate overflowing with cookies.”

  “I heard the whole thing. Sorry for eavesdropping. It’s a bad habit of mine.” He winked. “My favorite is waiting behind apartments.”

  A fresh set of goose bumps rose on her arms and she rubbed them.

  “Are you cold?”

  She didn’t like anything about this, but loved every second of it. She was supposed to be forgetting about him, not obsessing over the curve of his dimple. She nodded.

  “You’re still wearing your jacket, and it’s warm in here.” He set the plate on the table. “Here, let me help you.”

  From out of nowhere, Rachel appeared next to them. “Mallory’s thinking about joining our drama team.”

  “Really?” Eric never took his eyes from Mallory.

  Heat rushed to her face.

  Rachel grabbed her hand. “She would be perfect for the part of Elizabeth. Don’t you think?”

  Soft, instrumental music played in the background, and a few of the teenagers walked out to center stage. Mallory stared at the couples twirling across the floor.

  “Elizabeth. Yes, she would.” His words were quick, matching the rhythm of her heart.

  “Oh, Mallory, you have to try out for that part.” Rachel nudged her arm, breaking her reverie. “You would be perfect.”

  “I’m not here to try out. I can’t ...”

  “Sorry, guys, I’m borrowing her for a few.” Mallory jumped when Andrew grabbed her hand and swept her to the middle of the room. Her words were lost on her tongue as Andrew lifted and spun her around.

  “What are you doing?” She gasped.

  “We’re dancing. I know you’re ankle is probably still hurting, so I thought I’d hold you.”

  “Andrew.” Mallory slapped his arm.

  “Okay, okay, I’ll release you.”

  Mallory’s feet settled on the floor. “Are you crazy?”

  “Everybody was dancing and I wanted to dance with you.”

  She brushed her hands against her shirt and glanced over her shoulder. “You should’ve asked first. I would’ve considered it.” She paused. “Maybe.”

  “I didn’t think about that. At Vic’s party you couldn’t, and here, well, you’re one of us … so I wanted to make it up to you.”

  “No one has ever cared enough to do something like that for me.” She pushed against his arm with her shoulder. “Thank you, Andrew.”

  “Okay, people.” The drama director, Jonathan, called attention and everyone turned to listen. “It’s time to get to work. Party’s over. Let’s grab our scripts and get into position to read some lines.”

  Moving toward the group, Mallory looked over her shoulder at Andrew. “I can’t wait to hear you read yours.”

  “I can’t wait to hear you.”

  Mallory shook her head. “I’m not reading.”

  “Oh, yes, you are.” Andrew winked.

  Jonathan handed out scripts and gave her one. As a few couples read through them, acting out the scene, Mallory was drawn into the story. She blocked everything from her mind and became the character as she read the lines.

  When they finished, Jonathan clapped. “That’s it for the day. Great job, I’ll hand out parts when we come back together.”

  Jonathan stopped her at the back door. “You’ll be at rehearsal?”

  “If you want me to come.” Her voice wavered.

  “Absolutely. See you then.”

  On Tuesday, Mallory and Rachel reached the auditorium fifteen minutes early. Jonathan approached them as soon as they arrived. “Mallory, I’m so glad you decided to join us. I’ve prayed about this and spoken with a couple of the other team members, and we would like you to try Elizabeth’s part.”

  “Elizabeth?” It couldn’t be a big part, but she was excited to be given something.

  Jonathan handed her a folder. “Here are the lines. Since you’re early, you’ll have a few minutes to scan through while we’re waiting on everyone else.”

  “You’re perfect for it.” Rachel wrapped her arm around Mallory.

  “You already knew about this? Why didn’t you tell me?”

  “I didn’t want you to think I had anything to do with it.”

  “But you did. Didn’t you?”

  “No. I promise. He only asked if you would be dependable if he offered you the part.”

  “I’m so nervous, but so excited.” Mallory plopped onto the floor, turned to the script’s first page, and scanned through several scenes. Flipping through the pages, she quickly figured out that the character of Elizabeth was the lead role. Her apprehension grew with each line she read. “Hey, who’s playing Mr. Darcy?”

  Rachel spoke to a few other girls and didn’t hear her question. Mallory stood as she finished the last few lines. She was lost in thought when Eric came in, but then their eyes met and her stomach fluttered and didn’t stop until the feeling swept through every inch of her.

  Eric glanced at his watch. Practice would start in two minutes. He examined every face until he spotted Mallory standing against the wall, staring at him. He smiled, but she turned quickly when their gaze met.

  “Let’s get started now that our other lead is here.” The director led them to their positions.

  Mallory stared wide-eyed at Jonathan. Eric blinked, frowning. She didn’t know he was playing Mr. Darcy. “Hi, so I hear you’re playing Elizabeth.”

  “Yes, but I can’t believe it. This is my first time doing anything like this.”

  “Don’t worry, you’ll be fine.” He wanted to take her hand and lead her to the microphones, but instead crammed his hands in his pockets. “Come on, we’ll be over there.”

  She silently followed him to their position and stood opposite him.

  The director cleared his throat. “Let’s start with scene twenty. This is one of the stronger scenes and will give me an idea about what we’ll need to work on.” His gaze glances between them. “Elizabeth finds out Mr. Darcy convinced Mr. Bingley that her sister Jane was no good for him. Have you read the book or seen the movie?”

  Mallory shook her head. Eric knew the part perfectly, but worried he wouldn’t be able to stop himself when it came to the end of the scene. But that didn’t matter. If they were going to play this part opposite each other he would have to make this believable. It would be better to show Mallory now what to expect from him. Jonathan would require no less. Besides, he would take no chances of losing this part to any other actors. It would be easy speaking these lines to Mallory. His pulse raced in an unsteady rhythm just at the thought.

  “Please, if any of you haven’t seen the newest movie, I ask that you see it as soon as possible.” Jonathan pointed at his page. “Look at each other. You two are deeply in love, but Mallory you are devastated by what you’ve learned.”

  If only you knew how I feel for her.

  Mallory concentrated on the part. After reading through it twice, she understood the story and forced herself to believe Eric was Mr. Darcy and she was Elizabeth. There would be no other way to get through this. It was almost impossible to control the raging emotions whenever she met his gaze. The electricity that flared between them as they read their lines felt like magic. Eric looked at her like a man in love and with such depth she believed it was real.

  Scene twenty-one was mostly an argument between the two of them, but he stepped closer to her, the pain in his eyes evident that her words were killing him. His gaze fell to her lips, and she was drawn toward him. He brushed his fingers against her hand and tingles raced up her arm. A strong force captured her as if no one else
existed.

  Eric spoke his last line. “Forgive me, Madam, for wasting your time.”

  The room cheered, and Mallory stumbled backward.

  “Wow.” Jonathan took her arm and turned her to face him.

  Mallory’s neck burned as electricity exploded inside her. She was falling in love.

  Rachel grabbed her arm. “You were amazing. You both were, together. That was incredible.”

  Mallory bit her lower lip. “Thank you. It was fun.” She tried to get control, still dizzy from the intense passion. A wave of uncertainty devoured her. What if she couldn’t do this? What if she wasn’t good enough? Then the worst fear of all crossed her mind … what if Eric recognized her true feelings?

  Seventeen

  Eric yearned to take Mallory into his arms, but instead allowed her to walk away. A tiny rumble of remembrance speaking his lines with Mallory rushed like waves through his body and mind. The memory of her eyes burned in him.

  Jonathan slapped him on the back. “Eric, I’ve never seen this side of you. The two of you together was … I don’t even have words to describe it. I’m impressed, man.”

  “It was her. She was amazing.” Eric skimmed the room until he found Mallory standing in a corner against the wall.

  “Yes, she was. Does this mean you’ll take the part?”

  “Absolutely.”

  “Good, I wasn’t going to give you a choice. You two are perfect together.” Jonathan left Eric in a spiral of torturous thoughts.

  She was more perfect for him than he could have ever dreamed.

  He wanted to catch her. Wisps of her long waves trailed down her back, rustling from side to side as she stepped through the door with Andrew.

  He rushed toward them. “Mallory.” She turned and he caught her arm, pulling her toward him as she wobbled backward on the last step. “Whoa, I’m so sorry.”

  “It’s okay. At least you caught me.”

  The pink hues flooding her cheeks, matched the warmth of her arms. He didn’t want to let go.