Grif nodded. “I get you.”
Donald held his gaze for a long beat and then gave one short nod. “There’s more.”
Grif braced himself.
“Whoever you’re biological dad was, he knocked your mom up and left her. That’s on him, not you. And you’re not just his. You’re a product of environment, which means you have the mountains in your blood. The ranch in your blood. And me. Goddammit, you have me.”
Grif couldn’t have spoken to save his life, he was that shocked. And moved.
And when Donald reached out, Grif grasped his father’s hand tightly.
“You were never my dirty secret,” Donald said in that same voice that had flayed Grif alive more times than he could count. “And if you felt like you were, well, that’s on me. I thought of you as mine. And that’s the biggest reason I kept the secret. The angry, pissed-off teenage Grif couldn’t have handled the truth. He’d have left and never come back.”
Grif absolutely knew that to be true. He squeezed his dad’s fingers and then leaned over him again, this time for a hug.
* * *
The last week of school flew by so much faster than Kate could have imagined. It was a blur of packing, end-of-year celebrations, and family time.
No Griffin time though.
He hadn’t left ASAP as planned, instead staying until his dad was out of the hospital and well on his way to a full recovery. She hadn’t actively avoided him, but their paths hadn’t crossed. And she couldn’t help but notice he hadn’t actively sought her out either.
Clearly there was nothing to say.
She’d made the big decision to go to UCSD immediately. She’d gotten an off-campus studio apartment and was going to take a full summer course load to get a jump start on her curriculum. She was starting next week.
Once she’d made the decision to go, she was ready. No looking back. Looking back made her heart hurt. She’d miss her family and friends, but she’d see them. They’d come to visit, and she would do the same. It was going to be good for all of them, and she’d be back. That wasn’t what hurt.
No, what hurt was knowing that she’d gambled on Griffin.
And lost.
* * *
Grif and Adam sat on their respective ATVs at the top of the ridge, staring down at the valley below. It was just past the ass crack of dawn and steam was rising from the rocky land as the sun slanted over the peaks.
“Going to miss any of it?” Adam asked.
Like a limb. “Maybe.”
Adam gave a small smile. “Liar.”
Grif shrugged. “It’s the way it is.”
“It didn’t have to go this way.”
“Got to have work,” Grif said.
“Could have found work less than two thousand miles away.”
This wasn’t anything Grif hadn’t said to himself a million times over the past week. “I’m not going to be all that far.”
“Would you be going if Kate wasn’t?”
Grif hesitated. “I don’t know.”
“Yeah, you do,” Adam said.
Yeah, he did.
“Look,” Adam said. “I’m the guy no one expected to find happiness with a woman. But I did.”
“So what are you saying?”
“That if I can, anyone can,” Adam said.
Grif slid him a look. “You needed a woman to be happy?”
“Don’t piss me off,” Adam said mildly. “You know what I’m talking about.”
Yeah, he did. From the moment he’d first seen Kate again the weekend of Adam and Holly’s wedding, he’d been on a crazy ride. At first he’d actually been cocky enough to think Kate couldn’t possibly give him anything other than a good time.
But she’d given him a hell of a lot more than that. For whatever reason, she’d seen something in him that she’d wanted, and she’d gone for it. She’d believed in him. She’d given him so damn much. She’d given him all of herself, every corner of her heart and soul.
He’d taken both, without giving a thing in return. And then, when the going had gotten tough, he’d tossed it all aside. He’d change that if he could, but he had no right to her now. None. “I’m not going to be the guy to hold her back.”
“So don’t.”
Grif thought about that and realized Adam was right. When Grif had come for the wedding, it had been with wariness and no expectations. Things had been black and white. He’d been hurt. He’d just gotten out of the military for the first time in his adult life. Neither of those things had been by choice.
But coming back here had been a choice. His first in a string of good choices, he knew now. His second good choice had been Kate.
Ah, who the hell was he kidding? He hadn’t been smart enough to pick her. She’d picked him. He’d gotten lucky is all. She’d picked him, and then she’d added color to the black and white that was his world. She’d added dimension. She’d added . . . life.
And now that life didn’t work without her in it.
“I screwed things up,” he admitted.
Adam shrugged. “Fix ’em.”
“It’s not that easy.”
Adam slid him a glance. “No shit.”
It took him another few days, but Grif figured out what he had to do.
Grovel.
He knocked on Kate’s door armed with what he hoped was an irresistible bribe. Ice cream. He’d added a card to the bag and hoped for the best.
Kate opened the door looking a little harried in faded jeans, a long-sleeved T-shirt that he was pretty sure was his, and bare feet. She stared at him.
“Hey,” he said, and thrust out the bag.
She looked into it.
“It’s double fudge,” he said.
She pulled out the card. It had a heart on the front but was blank on the inside because he’d forgotten to sign it. She looked up at him.
He grimaced. “I meant to write on that.”
This sparked some interest. “What were you going to write?” she asked.
Good question. He tried to see past her, but she was blocking his way in. “Maybe we can do this inside.”
“Do what?”
“Talk.”
She gave him a bad moment when she hesitated, but she did eventually step aside and gesture him in. “How’s your dad?” she asked.
“Fine.” He nodded. Christ, he was an idiot. “He’s going to be okay.”
“And you and your dad together?”
He blew out a breath. “We’re going to be okay, too.” He paused, hesitated really, which he rarely did, but he was feeling way out of his league. “I’m sorry for pushing you away, Kate. Everything I said about how I feel about you is true,” he said.
She nodded, and then . . . turned and walked off.
After a beat of hesitation, he followed her to her room. She was sitting on her bed looking down at her tightly clasped hands. “Even the pain-in-the-ass part?” she asked.
He let out a small smile. “Maybe especially that part.” He crouched in front of her and put his hands on her thighs. “Kate.”
She looked at him.
“I love you, Kate.”
Her eyes filled, but no tears fell.
“And I didn’t just get carried away in the moment,” he said. “I was with you because I wanted to be. I was wrong and—” He paused as she pushed him away and continued on with her packing as if he hadn’t spoken. Packing everything including her snow boots. Huh. He stared at her suitcase. “Does it snow in San Diego?”
She parlayed this with a question of her own. “You still taking that job in DC?”
“Yes.”
She fell quiet. He was so used to her chattering, the silence seemed wrong.
She zipped the huge suitcase and nodded. “You’ll be happier there.”
; “Kate—”
“I don’t think there’s anything left to say. We were a thing, a hot one, but it burned out.”
He actually looked down at himself to see if he was bleeding.
“It’s over,” she said quietly.
“It’ll never be over,” he said. “A part of us will always care no matter where we are or what we’re doing.”
She turned away at that, neither denying nor confirming his words. “Good-bye, Griffin,” she said instead, politely moving back to her front door and holding it open for him.
Grif drove home. He wasn’t sure how long he sat in his truck like a shell-shocked idiot, thinking so hard his windows fogged.
He knew he’d let Kate down, but damn. It couldn’t be too late. He could still become the man she thought him, no matter whose blood flowed through his veins. Pulling out his phone, he punched in a number. When Joe answered, Grif didn’t hesitate. “About the job.”
* * *
One week later, Kate entered her tiny studio flat after her first day of school, dropped her books, kicked off her shoes, and then went perfectly still.
There was a man sitting on the small love seat.
Griffin.
He rose and immediately dwarfed the living room. He pulled her heavy bag from her shoulder and let it fall. Then he tugged off her sunglasses. He didn’t smile at her gaping shock. He just looked at her, very serious.
“What are you doing here?” she whispered.
“Looking at you. You’re a sight for sore eyes, Kate.”
Her heart was pounding so loudly she barely heard herself say, “How long are you going to look at me?”
He smiled then, as if she were being funny. “Long as you’ll let me,” he said.
“And then?”
“And then I’m hoping you’ll let me put my hands on you.”
Oh God, it was too much, and she turned from him to take a badly needed moment. But now she was facing the small mirror over her desk, and she couldn’t handle looking at her reflection, seeing Griffin behind her. Gripping the desk for desperately needed balance, she bowed her head.
He came up behind her. Circling an arm around her waist, he kissed her just beneath her ear. The feel of him, the scent of him, everything about his nearness made her weak in the knees. Her eyes drifted shut, and she very nearly tilted her head to give him better access, but she controlled herself. Still, there was no holding in her moan. She’d missed him so much, too much. “Griffin.”
“Missed you, Kate,” he murmured.
For a moment she closed her eyes, allowing herself to savor the sensation of his embrace, but she couldn’t let him do this to her, refused to let him destroy her again. Lifting her head, she met his gaze in the mirror. “Why aren’t you in DC?”
“Decided against the bitch of a commute,” he said lightly.
She wasn’t amused. “I don’t understand.” And she wanted to understand. She needed to understand.
“I didn’t take the job,” he said. “I don’t care about it. You’re the only thing I care about, Kate.” He smiled a bit wryly. “I’d move to the moon to be with you. Or, as it turns out, San Diego.”
They were surrounded by the complications of her new life, and yet he still managed to make it all sound so simple. She closed her eyes again, but Griffin cupped her face, waiting her out.
“You caught me off guard,” he said when she opened them again. “Knocked my sorry ass for a loop the way you reeled me in.”
“I reeled you in?”
He laughed. “In the best way. You embraced me, compromised me . . . loved me.”
Kate couldn’t speak. She could scarcely breathe. “I also seduced you.”
“My favorite part,” he said. “When I got hurt, I went to Sunshine because it was ‘home,’ but I was wrong. Home is wherever you are, Kate.”
Her heart squeezed tight, so damn tight that she couldn’t talk, and Griffin studied her for a long beat. “If you’re not ready for this,” he said quietly, braced for something. “Just tell me.”
Rejection. He was putting on a good show, but he wasn’t sure about his reception here in her world. “There’s no ranch here to run,” she said. “What will you do?”
He shrugged. “I like the beach. Always did think I’d make a great lifeguard.”
She stared at him. He remained utterly still for her inspection, his eyes unwavering and intense, and . . . vulnerable.
No, he was nowhere near as laid-back as he wanted her to believe. In fact, she was pretty sure he wasn’t breathing, waiting on a response from her. “You’d move here for me,” she said cautiously, needing this spelled out.
He gestured to a pack on the floor near the love seat. “Already did.”
“Just for me,” she murmured, marveling at the truth of it. Turning to face him, she sighed in pleasure as his warm, strong arms closed tightly around her. “For my dream . . . Oh, Griffin.”
“Is that ‘oh, Griffin, how romantic’ or ‘oh, Griffin, you’re an idiot’?”
“Both, but mostly the first.”
He chuckled, the sound raw with relief as he rubbed his jaw against hers. Then he buried his face in her hair, letting out a long, ragged breath that seemed to come from the very bottom of his heart and soul. “About your dream,” he said. “I was hoping it might include me.”
She slid her fingers into his silky hair and lifted his head so she could see his face. “It always has.”
He stared into her eyes as the tension seemed to drain from him. “Always,” he breathed. “I like the sound of that word from you.” He stroked a hand down her back and then up again, fingers spread wide as if he needed to touch as much of her as possible.
“Griffin,” she said softly, having the exact same need. “Tell me you love me now.”
“I love you now,” he said, never taking his gaze from hers, giving her a promise, a vow. Giving her everything she’d ever wanted. “I love you always.”
Epilogue
One Year Later
Kate came back to Sunshine with a lot less fanfare than she’d left. She stood at the top of the dam, a light wind blowing her hair back from her face as she stared down at the lake far below.
A big, warm, callused palm slid into hers. With a smile she entwined her fingers with Griffin’s. They’d just spent the past few days driving back from San Diego. Wanting one last moment to themselves before they met up with both of their families waiting for them at the ranch, they’d stopped here at Kate’s place.
“You okay?” he asked.
She drew in a deep breath and smiled up into his tanned face. It had been the best year of her life. “I don’t remember ever being better.”
He gave her a smile. “It was a good year,” he said. “But I’m thinking it’s time to change things up a bit.”
“We’re moving back to Sunshine,” she said. “I’ve got my job at the school, and you were just hired on at the local ATF office. How much more can we change things up?”
He stroked the hair from her face. “Well, for starters, you could be my wife.”
She went utterly still. “Are you asking me to marry you?”
“Too soon?” he asked.
The lump got bigger, and her heart swelled up against her ribcage. “No,” she said, pulling his mouth to hers. “It’s perfect.”
Dear Reader,
Did you know Rumor Has It isn’t the only book in the Animal Magnetism series? It all started with Animal Magnetism. The idea for that book hit me one day when I was grocery shopping. I was trying to figure out what I wanted to write next when I ran into a guy in army gear in the cookie aisle. Be still my heart. He had on dark sunglasses, absolutely no smile, and testosterone was pouring off him.
He ultimately chose two packages of granola bars instead of cookies, which nearly killed the fantasy, but
I recovered. By the time I’d gotten to my car, I’d concocted a whole backstory for him. And just like that, Animal Magnetism was born.
Brady Miller doesn’t smile much because he hasn’t had anything to smile about in a very long time. He’s an ex–army ranger, now a pilot for hire for organizations like Doctors Without Borders, back in the States at the request of his foster brothers. They run a large animal center in the middle of Nowhere, Idaho, and need his help.
He agrees to stick around for unusually complicated reasons, even though he’s lived his life as purposely uncomplicated as possible. Fact is, he’s not much of a family guy. He’s always been a wanderer, no roots, no home base.
Maybe even a guy who can’t be saved.
It takes a village to show him the truth, including one silly little puppy and one sharp-tongued, sharp-witted heroine willing to knock him flat on his ass to make sure he gets it—that he was never lost at all, and as the saying goes, home is where the heart is . . .
Turn the page to read the first chapter of Animal Magnetism. And after Brady’s story, read his foster brothers’ stories in Animal Attraction and Rescue My Heart. And the series isn’t over. More coming in 2014, so stay tuned. Meanwhile, I’m back in the grocery store looking for more inspiration.
Happy reading!
Jill Shalvis
Brady Miller’s ideal Saturday was pretty simple—sleep in, be woken by a hot, naked woman for sex, followed by a breakfast that he didn’t have to cook.
On this particularly early June Saturday, he consoled himself with one out of the three, stopping at 7-Eleven for coffee, two egg-and-sausage breakfast wraps, and a Snickers bar.
Breakfast of champions.
Heading to the counter to check out, he nodded to the convenience store clerk.
She had her Bluetooth in her ear, presumably connected to the cell phone glowing in her pocket as she rang him up. “He can’t help it, Kim,” she was saying. “He’s a guy.” At this, she sent Brady a half-apologetic, half-commiserating smile. She was twentysomething, wearing spray-painted-on skinny jeans, a white wife-beater tank top revealing black lacy bra straps, and so much mascara that Brady had no idea how she kept her eyes open.
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