“A great deal, my dear. When you look at him, there is no flame in your eyes. Whenever you spoke of Lord Davenport your eyes burned with your feelings.”
Audrey clenched her jaw. “My eyes may have burned for him,” she whispered low, “but I’ll bet if you’d seen his gaze it barely flickered for me.”
“Well, it’s true I never met the man,” Aunt Hillie reluctantly admitted.
Audrey sighed. “Enough. Lord Davenport is no longer of any matter to me, and Lord Thortonberry shouldn’t concern you. He isn’t here to court me.”
“Just remember, Marry in haste, repent at leisure.”
Audrey huffed out a breath. “The man is not here to ask me to marry him.”
“Perhaps not today,” her aunt replied breezily and swirled away to stroll down the hall.
Audrey turned back toward the study and paused before reentering. Lord Thortonberry possessed hair the color of mahogany, dark brown with tints of red. His back was to her and she noted the way he wore his hair longer than fashionable, the edges of his tresses hugging the nape of his neck. His broad shoulders led to a trim waist and well-built form. If memory served correctly, his complexion was kissed by the sun and flawless. He didn’t have a single scar, like Trent had on his right cheek. Her belly tightened and a soft sigh escaped her. She’d rather liked Trent’s scar. It had made him real and attainable, less like the perfect specimen he was.
Audrey squeezed her eyes shut and struggled to force Trent out of her mind once again. When she reopened them, she focused her gaze on Lord Thortonberry. In truth, the man was very handsome and many debutantes had often giggled when he strolled by. Was her aunt right? Did he want to be more than friends? What of Lady Caroline?
She waited for her breath to catch in her throat or her heart to pound, or her pulse to skitter as it had always done with just one glance in Trent’s direction, but she continued to breathe normally, her heart beat steadily, if not dully, and her pulse kept an even, uninterrupted rhythm. Perhaps her feelings would change in time? Egads. This was ridiculous to stand here and ponder her emotions for a man who wanted nothing more than her friendship.
Hurrying back into the study, she decided to take the seat on the same side of the desk as him. “Now,” she said while sitting and arranging her skirts, “you must explain why you would rush back home to aid me when you could have simply written and told me who to see about selling my mother’s jewels.”
A smile tugged at Lord Thortonberry’s lips. “The matter is too delicate for you see to it. A man needs to do it, and I assumed you would rather not tell anyone else of your predicament. Also, it occurred to me you might like to go to London for the remainder of the Season now that your mourning period is over, and since you no longer employ anyone but your coachman, I would be remiss not to come back and offer to accompany you for safety reasons.”
Truly, she barely employed her coachman. Mr. Barrett was working for her for free and doing odd jobs around Kent to make money. She was too embarrassed to admit that on top of everything else. So she said simply, “Ah, I see.” Audrey leaned back in her chair. Her aunt had been dead wrong. Not that it mattered ever so much. “That’s very kind of you. I’m sure returning here to so generously offer your services took you away from courting Lady Caroline.”
“Lady Caroline?”
Lord Thortonberry’s puzzled look baffled Audrey. How could the man forget the name of the woman he was supposedly in love with? A niggling suspicion tried to take root. Blast her aunt. Her words were filling Audrey’s head with silly notions. “Surely you’ve not forgotten Lady Caroline Rosewood, the woman you confessed to caring for. I assumed you’d gone to London to court her.”
Lord Thortonberry shifted in his chair. “Did you? No. I went to London on business as I told you. I have to confess I didn’t give a thought to Lady Caroline while I was there. Perhaps I’ll run into her when I return to London with you.”
Audrey narrowed her gaze. “That’s not a very good plan. If you like her, you must put yourself in her path. Not rely on fate to help you. Take it from me, fortune doesn’t seem to be very accommodating.” Lord Thortonberry frowned. Perhaps he was less confident than she’d given him credit for. “Are you shy to approach her? I can help you, you know. Not like last time, but we could think of something.”
He cleared his throat. “I couldn’t ask you to do that.”
“Don’t be silly,” Audrey said, staring at his twitching lip. She had definitely hit a nerve. “You’d be helping me.”
He blinked. “I’d be helping you?”
He sounded so astounded that she laughed. “Yes, indeed. With the estate destitute and Richard gone I have decided I need to go to London and try to find a husband, and assisting you will help to take my mind off the dreaded husband hunt.”
His gaze locked on her with the most peculiar expression that for one moment, she considered perhaps her aunt was right and he did care for her. She swallowed, suddenly afraid he might offer for her. He didn’t make her tremble just being near her, as Trent once had.
How silly she was. Hadn’t she just had the thought that marrying someone who had the potential to love her was better than nothing at all? Why was he still staring so peculiarly? “Is something the matter?”
Lord Thortonberry crossed one leg over the other and studied her for a moment. “Lady Audrey, I wish to―”
“Audrey,” Aunt Hillie shrilled, making Audrey startle. She glanced toward the door as her aunt strode into the room.
“I thought you were napping, Aunt,” Audrey said pointedly.
“Pish posh.” Her aunt waved a hand toward the door. “There are three very determined visitors here to see you.”
“Visitors?” Now who could it be?
Her aunt nodded. “They told me to tell you Ladies Sally, Gillian and Whitney are here to visit and they won’t take no for an answer.”
Despite her misgiving about allowing her friends back into her life, happiness bursts within her chest. She glanced at Lord Thortonberry. “I really must take these callers.” Audrey scrambled to her feet and retrieved the jewels from her locked desk drawer. Striding back to Lord Thortonberry she handed them to him. “Take these. We can discuss it further tomorrow, if need be.”
He surprised her by clasping her hand and kissing it. “Until tomorrow, my lady.” With a quick bow, he turned and headed out the door.
Audrey stood for a moment, gaping, until her aunt’s chuckle snapped her out of her stupor. “So,” her aunt said, linking arms with Audrey. “Do you believe me now, that Lord Thortonberry doesn’t wish to be merely friends with you?”
“Perhaps.” Audrey strolled toward the drawing room with her aunt but pulled them to a stop before they drew too near. “Aunt, I’ve determined that I’ll give myself a month to hopefully meet someone I believe I can fall in love with.”
“So I take it you don’t trust you could fall in love with Lord Thortonberry.”
“I’m not sure.” Audrey wrung her hands. “I don’t feel that strange fluttering I wish I did, but if he declares for me and I’ve not met another, I may very well consider him. At least if Lord Thortonberry loved me or thought he could, then one of us would be entering the marriage as I always dreamed it would be. Don’t you agree?”
“I don’t believe I do. I think you should only marry if you fall in love. Otherwise, I feel certain you’ll be unhappy.”
Audrey stiffened her spine. “Aunt Hillie, marrying a man I love may not be practical for me or within my reach.” Unspoken was the fact that she had loved Trent. She’d never give her heart to a man who would not return her love. At least she knew if she married someone who loved her, she’d always treat them kindly and surely grow to love them in some sort of way.
“Yes, I suppose that much is true, though I’ve never cared much for practicality myself, and I’ve survived thus far.”
Audrey clenched her jaw on her response. Her aunt was surviving because she was living here. If things didn’t wo
rk out for love, then Audrey had to eventually be practical enough for herself and her aunt. Their existence depended on it.
A moment later, Audrey opened the drawing room doors to a hum of chatter that stopped immediately when she entered the room, and then erupted into exclamations of delight. As she was embraced in her friends’ arms one by one, her eyes grew teary and a lump of happiness lodged in her throat. Once the welcoming hugs were over, she pulled back and looked at each of them. “If you came all the way from London to insist I attend your parties, there was no need. I already decided I’m coming.”
“That’s wonderful to hear, dear,” Whitney replied, stepping away from her sister and Sally to link her arm through Audrey’s left one. “We did come here for that purpose, but we also came to strategize with you.”
“Strategize with me?”
“Yes, silly goose,” Sally said, moving forward and taking her other arm. “We know your brother has fled.”
Audrey tensed and tried to pull away, but both women tugged her toward them at once. “How could you know that?” she demanded.
Whitney quirked her mouth. “Sin told me before he left for France that your brother had disappeared and he bade me to look out for you.”
For a moment, Audrey considered asking Whitney to loan her the money to hire someone to find Richard, but since she saw no hope of repaying it, she reluctantly pushed the thought aside and focused on what Whitney had revealed. “Trent asked you to watch over me?” The way his name rolled off her tongue set her heart to racing and made her toes curl in her slippers. Ruthlessly, she mentally quashed her feelings. “How is your illustrious cousin?” The scratchy tightness of her voice was appalling. She didn’t want anyone to know how desperately he’d hurt her.
“I’m not sure,” Whitney said, her gaze level on Audrey.
Audrey looked down, afraid her face would betray her pounding heart. She ran a smoothing hand over her dress. “Has he not returned from France, then?”
“No, not yet.”
Whitney spoke in gentle tones as if Audrey was delicate. Drat it all. It didn’t matter if Whitney could see Audrey’s face or not. Her friend clearly could tell Trent still had the ability to affect her. That simply wouldn’t do. She raised her chin and squared her shoulders. “Well, I hope he’s well, but I no longer wish to discuss him.”
“We had no intentions of discussing Trent with you. Why would we? You both pointedly told me there is no future between you as things stand,” Whitney said with a matter-of-fact tone.
Audrey swallowed to hold the emotions back that suddenly seemed all too raw again. “Well, I’m glad he comprehends where I stood on the matter of us.” Her voice hitched, betraying the swirling tempest inside her. Whitney, Sally and Gillian exchanged a swift look that Audrey caught, which included Sally and Gillian inclining their heads toward Whitney as if agreeing on something. Audrey clenched her fists at her sides. Why did her belly clench and her chest feel hollow? If she was so relieved Trent would never bother her again, she should feel nothing but pleased.
“Let’s sit for a moment,” Whitney murmured and tugged on Audrey’s arm to guide her to the settee with Gillian and Sally trailing behind. All three women settled around Audrey, and then Whitney spoke. “I didn’t plan on telling you this, but I―”
“Ahem.” Gillian and Sally cleared their throats at the same time. Audrey suppressed a smile at the pointed matching looks both women directed at Whitney.
“I beg your pardon,” Whitney said. “We think you should know that before Sin left he confessed to me that he did not think you would wait for him if he asked you to because you wanted to marry for love. Is this true?”
“Of course it is,” Audrey retorted, her anger at Trent slipping out to singe her innocent friend. To Audrey’s immense irritation, she found that her hands were shaking. “He so generously offered me a marriage of convenience,” she exclaimed with a false note of gratitude. “Of course his very princely proposition was contingent upon his returning without a wife in tow.” She laughed in an attempt to cover her pulsing annoyance, but it was useless. She’d never been good at controlling her temper once it got away from her. “I’m afraid I had to decline his proposal, and yes, I said I wanted to marry a man who loves me.” She bit down hard on her lip, aware how utterly bitter and angry she sounded. “I’m sorry,” she whispered. Losing control of her emotions and unleashing her simmering rage with Trent on her friends was disgusting. He’d reduced her to a deplorable human being. The fiend.
“Darling, don’t be sorry,” Sally crooned as only a duchess could do. “If I’d been in your shoes I might have found a pistol and shot the man in the other arm.”
Audrey laughed again, but this time it was genuine.
“Truly, you’ve no need to apologize,” Gillian added. “Trent is…” Her face took on a thoughtful look.
“Enigmatic,” Sally said.
“Emotionally scarred,” Gillian added.
“Unpredictable.” Whitney cocked her head and eyed Audrey.
Audrey took a deep breath. “Unforgettable,” she blurted, then slapped her hand over her mouth. Her cheeks blazed with embarrassment. After a long awkward silence, she slid her hand away. “I meant to say unforgivable.”
“Of course you did. The words are so very similar.” Whitney gave her a sage look. “Well, enough talk of him since it won’t help you now. We need to discuss your return to Society.”
Audrey nodded. “Are there any rumors swirling about me?”
“Not at all.” Whitney smiled cheerfully. “No one knows about the duel or whatever else occurred that night. We don’t even know all the details. Do you care to share?”
“No,” she said with a smile, feeling lighter now that she knew her secrets were safe. “Not being the talk of the ton should make finding a husband much easier.”
“I never said your family wasn’t the latest on dit.”
“You just did,” Audrey exclaimed.
“No.” Whitney shook her head. “I said your ruination wasn’t all the gossip. Unfortunately your family’s debt was leaked by someone and your, um, lack of funds, for a nicer way of putting it, is all the chatter.”
“Heavens.” Audrey pressed a hand to her aching head. Disturbing quakes disrupted the brief serenity she’d experienced for a moment. “That won’t make finding a husband easy, especially in the short amount of time I have.”
“Just to be clear so we all know the terms we are working under.” Sally leaned forward, her brows rising high over her eyes. “You require that you love your husband.”
Audrey bit her lip. “I do, but I concede that I may have to be willing to settle for man who thinks he loves me or can grow to love me.” A vivid memory of her mother’s constant unhappy face filled Audrey’s mind. She shuddered. If only she would meet a man who made her feel as Trent did. Or had. She feared that would never happen, but she had to try.
Paris, France
After six months in France of trying to discover if Gwyneth was dead or alive Trent was on the verge of securing his answer, he hoped. He peered out the window directly to his left and stared at the blue waters of the Seine. He counted the many boats navigating down the river, but the ritual did not calm him as it had many times before. Needing an anchor of peace, he wandered his gaze across the stone Pont Neuf bridge. The beautiful construction of the bridge filled him with wonder as always. He tried to imagine how long it must have taken the workers to build the five arches that joined the left bank to Île de la Cité and the seven arches that joined the bridge to the right bank of the city. And how they must have agonized to create the perfectly jutting bastions.
Clanking glasses broke his concentration and stole his peace like a swift pickpocket. Tension once again coiled through him. The sun faded fast in the bright orange sky and cast lengthening shadows through the windows and into the pub. Shadows were good, though. The corner table he had chosen at L'abreuvoir now sat in near darkness. A pub girl came around to light a taper, bu
t he shook his head and with a smile she moved away. Smoke lay heavy in the pub’s air, which suited him perfectly. The haze of grayish white made seeing difficult and helped to disguise him, though he’d taken pains since the moment he set foot in Paris to mask himself. He had taken even longer with his disguise today, since Gwyneth’s brother, Pierre, would soon be here and he didn’t want Pierre to recognize him.
At this moment, he would have given a week of his life to rid himself of the lengths he’d gone to in an effort to mask his appearance. The full beard covering his face bothered him like an itch he couldn’t get to, even after three months of it being completely grown in. He smelled of fish, which he’d never cared for and liked even less now that he’d rubbed the slimy things on his body to attain the stench of a seaman. The wool coat, its collar high and pressed against his cheek, irritated him, but that could have been his damn surly mood.
Paris stunk and he was sick of French accents. He longed for London and the clipped tones of his family and friends. Audrey’s image swirled in his head as it did every day since he’d been gone, but he forced it away. Now was not the time to allow his focus to waver. He took a large swig of ale to keep up his pretense of a sailor on a mission to get deep in his cups. His hair ended up in his mouth as he drank.
Damnation. He gripped the large mug of ale in an effort to quell his instinct to put the long hair that hung around his face to order. After years of wearing his hair much shorter, having it touch his neck rankled him but served the purpose of further shielding his face and most importantly his scar. He covered it every day with the makeup Claudia, a theater girl he had met when he arrived here, had given him when offered the right amount of money to do so without questions. Unease danced over his skin. Under the clump of cream, he could detect the raised line that was uneven with the rest of his skin. If he could distinguish it, then so could Pierre, and Gwyneth’s brother discovering he was still alive would be tedious and potentially dangerous, considering the man wanted him dead possibly bad enough to follow him to London and put his family in danger. It was much simpler for Pierre to continue to think Trent had died trying to escape France.
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