by Amy Lillard
How many constituted “dearly beloved”? Only Evelyn, Grandma Esther, Jake, and Wesley were there to witness the event, yet the man talked as if there were two hundred guests crammed into the Langston ranch house.
Jessie mentally shook her head to clear her thoughts and did her best to concentrate on what the preacher was saying.
“Repeat after me. I, Jessica Elizabeth McAllen, take thee, Seth Daniel Langston, to be my lawfully wedded husband.”
She trembled.
Seth gently squeezed her fingers, spurring her into speech.
Her voice sounded squeaky and high-pitched as she repeated her vows to love, honor, and cherish him until death. Seth’s voice rang with confidence and affection as he made his promises to her.
Was he really planning on staying married to her forever? Could they make it with everything stacked against them? Did she want them to?
Wesley stepped up next to her and tugged on her dress. Jessie turned as the young girl flashed her snaggletooth smile and handed her a plain gold band.
Jessie took it, shooting her own trembling smile to Wesley and turned to Seth. “With this ring, I thee wed,” she said as she slid it on his finger.
Then he reached into his pocket and pulled out a matching band and pledged the same to her.
“I now pronounce you man and wife. Seth, you may kiss your bride.”
He stepped closer to her and tilted her chin with one hand.
Jessie’s eyes fluttered closed as his lips met hers only briefly. Still, the touch was explosive, like every other kiss they had shared. Yet this one held a promise of more, of a lifetime, of the child nestled between them.
He lifted his head, his fiery green eyes blazing into hers. For the first time in the two weeks since they had been planning this wedding, she thought about tonight. She and Seth all alone in the house they had planned to share. Alone in her full-size bed. It was the only one in the house as of yet. A couple couldn’t sleep in a bed that size without brushing against each other with every breath. And if Seth meant to make a real go of their marriage, then . . .
She continued to stare at him, his eyes promising the world, a world she so desperately wanted for her own.
“Well, well, well.”
The moment was broken.
Jessie turned, only vaguely aware that everyone else did the same.
Chase stood just inside the great room, his duffel bag in one hand, the other wrapped in a blue cast from fingertip to wrist. A yapping puppy danced around his feet, his pink tongue lolling out one side of his mouth. The poor pooch was completely unaware of the rising tensions in the room.
The bag hit the floor with a thud. The puppy danced backward, then let out a shrill bark.
“What have we here?” Chase drawled looking from her to his brother.
Seth took a step forward. “We tried to call you. Several times, in fact.”
Chase shrugged. “Had to get a new number. Crazy girl,” he said, his gaze landing on Jessie. “You know how it is.”
Jessie trembled under his scrutiny.
“Would someone like to tell me what’s going on or am I just supposed to guess why my brother is marrying my girl?”
“Chase, I—” Jessie started forward, but Seth stepped in front of her.
“This is our wedding day,” he stated, his voice steady and deep. “We can talk about this later.”
Chase shot his brother that trademark grin of his, but it didn’t reach his eyes. “I think we need to talk about this now.”
Everyone opened their mouth to explain, but it was as if no one knew exactly what to say. Or maybe it was where to start.
Finally Jake took a couple of steps toward his brother. “Seth and Jessie are going to have a baby in a few months. Getting married is the natural thing for them to do.”
For a moment she thought she saw pain flash in Chase’s eyes, but it was gone almost as quickly as it came.
“I see.” His gaze flicked over her, then landed on Seth. “There’s no accounting for taste, I guess.”
“Watch yourself,” Seth snarled.
Jessie had never heard him use that tone of voice before. Ever-cool, levelheaded Seth sounded as if he had been pushed to the edge.
“What?” Chase asked, his stance belligerent. “Is it my fault one Langston wasn’t enough for her?”
Like a flash Seth moved toward his brother. Jessie didn’t have time to utter more than a strangled cry as Seth grabbed Chase by the collar and forced him back against the nearest wall. Pictures rattled as Seth slammed Chase’s head against the wood. Evelyn cried out.
“Take it back.” Seth’s voice was low and dangerous. Jessie was rooted to the spot, as was everyone else in the family. Wesley moved behind her nana as Jake sprang into action.
He pushed between his brothers, doing his best to keep the situation from escalating beyond control.
Jessie clamped a hand over her own mouth to keep her cries at bay. She was the cause of this. Her and her impulsive ways. She would never do anything to upset anyone in the Langston family, and yet in one afternoon she had managed to hurt them all, a lasting, bone-deep wound that might not ever heal.
“Let him go, Seth,” Jake said. “It’s not worth it.”
“Yeah, Seth,” Chase snarled. “She’s not worth it.” He pulled away, yet remained close enough for a brawl.
Seth started after his brother once again, but Jake blocked his path.
“Get out, Chase,” Jake said, not bothering to look at his youngest sibling.
Chase wiped his uninjured hand across his mouth, the action leaving a telltale trail of blood. Somehow in the scuffle his lip had been busted. “Yeah,” he said with an angry sniff. “I think I will.”
He stopped long enough to scoop up his duffel bag and headed for the door, his legs stiff.
A few heartbeats later the front door slammed behind him.
“I’ll just . . . ,” Evelyn started, then turned and ran after Chase.
Jessie wanted nothing more than to crumple to the floor in a sobbing heap of regret. What had she done? How could any of them ever forgive her?
Instead she stiffened her spine and blinked away her tears. All of her life had been building to this moment. Her grandmother was right. She was no better than her mother—in fact, she might be worse. But she was going to do everything in her power to make it right.
* * *
Seth took the plate of cake from his mother, who insisted that the two of them follow as many wedding traditions as possible. He had thought about this moment a couple of times in the last two weeks. He was supposed to feed his bride a bite of cake and she was supposed to do the same for him. He had imagined smashing it on her face and then kissing away the frosting, not caring that his family was keeping a watchful eye.
But since Chase had walked in the door, the mood had been ruined. Seth wasn’t up for silly cake play. He wanted to whisk Jessie home and show her, in ways that Chase never had, how much he loved her and how he couldn’t live without her. But even that was now impossible. He couldn’t bring himself to brand her to him until she loved him in return. It might be naive of him, but he wanted that in return. Needed it. She was his, damn it, whether she knew it or not.
He jumped as a door slammed somewhere in the house, but he still managed to feed Jessie a bite of their wedding cake without incident.
After Chase had stormed out, their mother went after him and convinced him to stay. Seth supposed that it probably took some convincing. Chase never did like to be told what to do. He’d come back in, but he was prowling through the room like a caged animal.
Seth was more than ready to go home.
He accepted the bite of cake that Jessie fed him. It seemed as if she wasn’t in for playful feedings either.
His mother clapped as if cake eating was the most spectacular th
ing, then called for Jake to start the music.
Seth turned to Jessie. “Do you want me to tell her that we can’t do this right now?”
She bit her lip and shook her head. He wasn’t sure if she wanted that first dance with her husband or if she wasn’t willing to battle his mother over the lost tradition.
He gave her a quick nod and led her from behind the table to the small patch of floor that had been cleared of furniture for this one occasion.
As naturally as breathing, he pulled her into his arms, realizing he had been waiting years for this very moment. Her dress appeared to be made of nothing but lace, and her hair curled around her face like a woodland sprite’s. If he’d thought his world had been set on its ear when she told him she was pregnant, it was nothing compared to realizing that he couldn’t live his life without her. He had loved her for so long, but his love was different now. It had been consummated. It was real and tangible and it had produced a child, another life to carry on, another Langston.
“You look wonderful. Did Mama help you pick out your dress?”
She frowned at him. “She was there.” Her voice held a sharp tone. Everyone was on edge thanks to Chase. “I’m perfectly capable of picking out my own dress.” She shook back her hair, the curls brushing his fingers as she did.
“That’s not what I meant. It just looks expensive, is all.” And that was something he shouldn’t have brought up either. “I mean, I don’t want you to spend your money on things like that. You should have—” He stopped. There was no way she would have let him pay for her trousseau. “You look beautiful,” he murmured.
She didn’t respond, and the tension didn’t leave her shoulders.
“It’s going to be okay, Jess.”
She turned those incredible gray eyes onto him. “Will it, Seth?”
From somewhere in the house another door slammed.
Seth bit back a sigh. He could only pray that it would.
* * *
Jessie sucked in a calming breath. It was over. There should be some solace in the fact. She twisted the unfamiliar gold band with her thumb and told herself to take it one day at a time. Wasn’t that the best way to get through whatever a person faced?
One day at a time. Tomorrow, who knew?
Soon she and Seth would head over to the old ranch house and start their life together. Until then, she had gone out onto the patio to escape from it all.
The pool twinkled like a turquoise jewel. The sun reflected off the water, sending diamondlike sparks dancing around. She longed to strip down and dive into the water, forgetting her troubles. But as with anything, she would eventually have to get out, dry off, and face life.
She drew in another breath and straightened her shoulders. She’d never had things easy. Why should this be any different? That was her lot in life. Jessie McAllen, wild child. It didn’t matter that she hadn’t done anything to deserve it. Well, aside from Homecoming ’08. It had always been that way and Cattle Creek was too small for any of that to change now. And the baby she carried was just fodder for the gossip mill. Never mind that the father was the brother of the man she had always thought she’d marry. That only made it worse.
“Jessie?”
She whirled around as Chase came out of the house. Had he been looking for her or had he simply come out here by chance? “Hi, Chase. I—” But she had no words to finish that sentence. I’m sorry. I can explain. I’m sorry that I can’t explain. Maybe we were never meant to be together all along.
But she had seen the betrayal that had flashed in his eyes when he saw her and Seth together. Whether or not she and Chase were destined to be a couple was not the issue. She had broken their understanding. And with his brother, no less. Words couldn’t make up for that kind of pain.
“Don’t say it,” he demanded, his voice husky from an emotion she couldn’t discern. “Just . . . don’t.” He took another step toward her and held out a small white card. “This is my phone number.”
She stared at the card, unwilling to touch it as if it were somehow poison. “I already have your number in my phone.”
“That’s the old number. This is the new one.”
She shook her head, unsure of what to say. Chase’s emotions seemed to be on a runaway roller-coaster ride. One minute he was snide and hateful. The next concerned and caring. And she wasn’t sure where she fit into his highs and lows.
“Just take it.” He pressed the card into her palm. “That way you’ll always have it.”
His hand was warm in hers, the card a little bent at the edges as if he had been walking around with it awhile before actually giving it to her.
“If he ever . . . if he ever treats you bad, you call me. Anytime, Jessie. I mean it. Day or night and I’ll come. I’ll always be there for you.”
She searched his face for some hint of his true feelings. Did he really think Seth would treat her poorly? He couldn’t. Yet maybe this was Chase’s way of apologizing for never being there for her all these years.
Swallowing hard, she gave a little nod.
“Ahem.”
Jessie started and turned toward the patio door.
Seth looked from her to Chase and back again. “Am I interrupting something?”
How much had he overheard? His thundercloud expression was the same one he’d been wearing all week, so it was anybody’s guess. He couldn’t have heard much or else he’d have Chase against the wall again. Or maybe—even worse—maybe Seth didn’t care that his brother had just questioned his integrity in front of his wife of two hours. His pregnant wife.
She had made such a mess of things.
Jessie shook her head and slipped the card into the bodice of her dress when Seth wasn’t looking. She hadn’t brought a purse to the ceremony. It wasn’t as though she needed one at the house, but she didn’t want Seth to see what Chase had given her if he hadn’t already.
“Not at all, big brother.” Chase’s tone dripped pure acid. He gave Jessie one last fleeting look, then pushed past Seth and back into the house.
Seth turned to her, but she had no words. “He . . . uh, he just wanted to wish us the best of luck.”
His nostrils flared and a muscle in his jaw jumped as he clamped his teeth together, but to his credit he didn’t call her a liar outright.
But what did it say about her that she was willing to lie to him mere hours after the ceremony?
Nothing good, that was for sure.
Seth gave a stern nod, then reached his hand out to her. “Come on,” he said. “The pastor is leaving. I think it’s time for us to go as well.”
Chapter Thirteen
Seth pulled his truck into the dirt space to the right of the front porch and got out. He couldn’t say it was an actual driveway, just a rutted dirt road with a strip of grass down the middle. He should have gotten Fred out here to grate it smooth before the wedding, but there just hadn’t been time. Now he was bringing his bride home to a house he loved, on a road as rough as a cob.
His bride. He went around to the passenger’s side and opened the door.
He had been so shocked and hurt that Jessie kept that damned card with Chase’s new phone number. Just the fact that she hadn’t crumpled it up and thrown it back in his face spoke volumes. She was still in love with Chase.
What did you expect? You get her pregnant and she just forgets about the brother that she really loves? Fool didn’t begin to cover it.
“Here.” She handed him the plastic container holding the top layer of their cake.
Grandma Esther had insisted that they bring it home and put it in the freezer to keep as part of their one-year wedding celebration. It might be nothing more than a silly wedding tradition, but he vowed to do everything in his power to make sure they got to eat that cake. He owed Jessie that much.
He stepped back as Jessie slid from the truck. She had barely
said two words to him since Chase stormed out of the big house. And he knew that she was blaming herself. Then to find them together on the patio was almost more than he could stand.
They hadn’t been close, but he could tell that a secret lingered between them. Was Jessie feeling guilty about marrying him? Had Chase convinced her that she was somehow less of a person for falling victim to Seth’s advances?
“It’s not your fault,” he wanted to yell, but he knew it would do no good. Jessie needed to see Chase’s shortcomings for herself, not have Seth point them out to her. Until that moment, he’d keep his opinion concerning his brother to himself.
Without a word he followed her to the porch.
She stopped at the door, her hands full with food and the bottle of nonalcoholic grape juice his mother had bought for them to toast with.
Unfortunately, after Chase’s little exhibition, no one had felt much like celebrating. They’d cut the cake so that Wesley could have a piece. His mother had insisted that they have a first dance. After that, they had stood around for about half an hour chatting with the pastor and trying to pretend that everything was as it should be. Jessie had stepped out onto the patio and Seth had started loading everything into his truck for the short ride over to the old ranch house.
He skidded to a halt behind Jessie, suddenly so very aware of the intimacy of their situation. They were married, about to enter the house they would share for . . . well, forever if he had anything to say about it.
He cleared his throat and moved to set the cake container on the old church pew that sat to the right of the front door. On the far left side, the chains suspending the porch swing from the roof creaked as the wind pushed against it.
“I guess this is where I carry you over the threshold?” He hadn’t meant for the words to come out like a question.
What was it about Jessie McAllen that had him stumbling over himself like a greenhorn?
“I don’t think that’s necessary.” She shifted from one foot to the other as she waited for him to let her into the house.
