I sitted still. I sitted and waited and wished hard for Meemaw.
Blue pyjamas man putted his face at the side of the doorway. He smiled at me went away again. I wished for Spiney but he was in Meemaw’s bag on her shoulder. I was without Spiney. Without Meemaw. I picked up Meemaw’s phone.
The phone was gone to black. I pressed the button on the side for on. Nothing no light no lock screen just still black.
The light on the ceiling buzzzz buzzzz and too blue too white. I thinked I feeled sick or something something wrong. Maybe it was because I wished Karen would be dead. Maybe this was a trap place for a punishment for evil doing. This was a witch’s trap place and horrible smell and Meemaw gone. I standed up. All was panic of fear inside me.
The corridor outside wasn’t long. At the end of it was a door of dark red splitted in half. Glass bits at the top and through them another room of hospital. I walked slow to the door thinked I would run back if blue pyjamas man saw me. But no one came.
At the door I could see through the glass bits if I standed up on tippy toes. Inside were six bed things of bodies on and machines. Hospital machines there.
Light inside there wasn’t the bluey white. It was more dark. I peered in the murky gloom of it.
At the very end I saw my Meemaw’s long hair her coat. Next to her tortoise man standed and in the bed a lump. I knowed it was a lump of Karen.
CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO
The Costa at the hospital was like the Costa of town but squished into small with little windows. Hospitally smell hiding under coffee smell.
Meemaw getted a tea and I had a bottle of orange juice of a straw. A eggy sandwich for sharing.
At the next table was a girl in her actual pyjamas. Pink with a unicorn of sharkle on the front. She had a tube right up her nose. Meemaw pulled on my sleeve.
Danny!
Can we go home now Meemaw?
No. Not just yet.
She was a colour now. A colour had comed to Meemaw as she sipped her smoky tea. It was brown. Her words were floaty far away. Not just yet were words that went floaty over the top of her tea away in the air. No more words.
I liked it the eggy sandwich a lot. I eated it fast even the crust that was shiny soft. I looked at Meemaw’s half.
Here, have my bit, love.
She pushed the plate nearer me I yummed it up too with a sippy sip of cold orange juice. Unicorn pyjamas girl was getting picked up for a carry. She was big as big as maybe eight. Big for a carry.
Danny!
Meemaw pulled my arm again. It meaned not look.
Meemaw started fiddling in the bag. She was making a rolly inside for a secret. Dancing hands. Little bits of tobacco coming out on the table. Then she standed up.
Come on! Bring your juice.
We went out slidey doors to a bench place round the corner. Meemaw lighted her rolly up. I sitted on the bench and drinked icy cold orange.
There was green green grass. On the other side a silver fence then road and cars. Meemaw did a long suck on her rolly. Then she rubbed her crunckled forehead. Her knuckles on it. I thinked of Karen hit and hitting her horrible Karen head.
Meemaw blowed out her smoke.
Meemaw can we go now?
I told you, no.
Not actual cross just steady brown quiet. Her voice hard to hear in the outdoors of cars. A bird in a tree by the fence was very loud of shouting in bird words. Blackbird. I finded it with my eyes. Yellow beak blackbird.
Then Meemaw maked a noise I hadn’t heared her ever make before. It was sort of ugh. But low of a man or a monster. Then Meemaw was shaky all over. Meemaw’s arms shaked and shaked. Her rolly jumped jumped on her knee and her knee doing jumping too.
Meemaw!
It’s… It’s… It’s all right, Danny love, I’m… just…
I slided right up close on the bench. Meemaw putted her arm round me. All of Meemaw’s body was jump jump. Her voice wobbly.
I think, I think we’d better…
But she didn’t say better of what. The cars on the road away past the silver fence were whoosh whoosh. We sitted and the noisy blackbird stopped shouting. He came down by our feet.
Blackbirds are my best birds because I know of them and their yellow beaks. But Meemaw telled that’s just the man ones of yellow beaks. This one was a man one. It hopped and looked at us with the beady eye. Then flew away.
Meemaw still shaky but only little gentle now like leafs up on the tree. I thinked of going in the world. I thinked maybe we should go now because this hospital had maked Meemaw go to ugh and was not good. And Karen was in it.
Spiney?
I holded him by my cheek my other cheek on Meemaw’s coat. I thinked hard for a minute of the world and go. Then I went just in the sunshine. My eyes going droopy and a hum. No more thinking of it. It was hard.
Meemaw’s song was a surprise. Meemaw does singing sometimes of bath time when we’re drying toes or sometimes washing up. But not in the world. And never she has ever singed a song of Spanish before. I knowed this was a song of Spanish because I couldn’t hear where words started or stopped and all was nonsense. Meemaw singed it very quiet.
I closed my eyes but no sleep came because of outdoors sounds and too much space. When Meemaw stopped I sat up straight opened my eyes. Still all day time and busy whoosh on the road.
The sun went away behind a cloud. It went a chilly breeze too.
Let’s go!
Yes!
We getted right to the front door of the hospital where was a man in a nighty. He had a pole on wheels. The man was smoking his rolly. He winked at me.
Meemaw standed still not looking at the man. Looking at the wall. The man speaked to Meemaw his voice came out a scary croak of a frog.
Are you all right, sweetheart? Are you lost?
Meemaw didn’t say. Meemaw stared at the wall like reading words but there was no sign. Then she picked me up. All was very fast as a surprise and we were back in the hospital down the long corridor. Meemaw going so fast. Coat flying. Me flying too.
NO!
Still Meemaw went on.
No no no no! Meemaw I want to go hooome! No no no!
A lady walked by looked at me. I pushed Meemaw’s shoulder she bumped it on a door. We went through.
Danny!
Meemaw speaked through her closed teeth of fury. She stopped still.
I was of fury too. I was crying. Snot running on my mouth I wiped it in a whoosh across Meemaw’s shoulder. Some went in her hair. I was wriggling fighting to get down. Meemaw putted me down.
I almost very almost runned. But I didn’t. All about was hospital. There was the long corridor in front us behind us. Doors to other hospital parts. There was smell.
So I gripped on Meemaw’s velvety coat and cried. Meemaw picked me up again and taked me in a toilet that was there. It was still horrible but just us in there. And a lock.
Meemaw washed my face patted it of a piece of blue paper thing. I stopped crying. Then I did a wee. Long and splashy in the toilet.
I know this is hard, love, but just hang on and we’ll go home soon.
Then she picked me up again and we flied down the corridor and I was gone to flop and no more crying. No more.
We ringed for to go back in the doorbell door. A lady of blue pyjamas came. We went in the little room and Meemaw putted me on the orange sofa.
We have to wait to talk to the doctor again, love. Here, you lie down.
Meemaw folded up her coat of a pillow and she sitted in the chair. She putted her arm across my tummy. Spiney by my nose for helping with the bad smell. I falled to sleep.
When I waked up purple pyjamas tortoise man was there on another chair right close to Meemaw. I did a big jump of shock. I sitted up fast and squiggled over to Meemaw’s lap. Meemaw just scoopled me up but looking at the tortoise man still. They were talking. He had eyes of such darkness and his slow tortoise voice.
Psych are of the opinion that she is safe to be discharged as long as there’s some
support available at home. So I need to know if that’s something you can offer?
Meemaw didn’t say anything.
She’ll have a referral on discharge and hopefully a follow-up appointment soon.
I pushed my face in Meemaw. She smelled of underarms. I feeled her thumping inside.
Obviously I don’t want to pressure you if you’re not comfortable with this.
Well it’s not much of a choice, is it really?
Well, the only other option is to section her if she really has no support. But, to be honest, I don’t even know if psych will consider that given this seems to be her first such incident and she’s not showing any signs of intent to harm herself now.
Meemaw pulled me closer on her lap. Tight arms.
I haven’t known her long.
No more talking for a minute. Tortoise man coughed.
She’ll get a psych referral and that appointment should be in the next few days, so she is being offered some ongoing support.
He putted his tortoise head sideways. Tortoise voice slow. Gentle to Meemaw.
We’ll keep her in tonight. On the ward. Just to monitor for twenty-four hours. Then we could look to discharge her tomorrow afternoon, if you could be here?
He was looking at Meemaw. All the time looking. Meemaw looking at the floor. I looked at the floor too. It had little shiny sharkles in the grey. Sharkles of diamonds. Meemaw’s voice was very quiet when she speaked the word.
Yes.
CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE
It taked Meemaw and me ages to get home. It was nearly to night-time again in our street.
But the shop was open. Meemaw putted three pounds on the electricity key. She buyed a small squishy of bread called Hovis that had a orange sticker of too much. 99p not 69p for big like Aldi. That was end of all the money in Meemaw’s purse again.
Our flat looked funny like a dream when Meemaw putted on the light. Like gone away for ages. It had its own smell I don’t hardly ever notice.
Meemaw filled up the kettle opened the fridge. Inside all white bright nothingy except a tiny of milk Meemaw throwed it down the sink.
The dinosaur world was still under the table. I crawled in looked at it. The wee was dried up I thinked it was good that Meemaw would never know of it. I sniffed close for smells. It was okay just a little bit of sticky.
Rex was the only visitor dinosaur standed on his feet. I maked Spiney go each to each to help them get up. Then they standed in a circle by the volcano.
Spiney said you’re all right my fellows let us face the great battle! But Rex was angry. He bited Spiney’s jaw because of all the long time we had been gone away. Spiney battled him down though. Spiney holded Rex tight until he stopped fighting. Spiney was victorious. Then they came out in a parade to go all the way to the window to look out for the enemy and I heard the low ugh noise again.
Meemaw was curled all up in the chair. Small small small.
Ugh! Ugh!
Shaking. Curled up like a snail.
I halted the dinosaurs. I squeezed in the thin space by Meemaw’s leg.
It’s okay Meemaw, it’s okay.
Her brown hair the only bit of Meemaw head to be seen. I patted it.
My tummy was going groobly groobly all squished up. I knowed it was a poo. I ignoring its calling for a long time because of always other toilets. Now that poo knowed we were home and it was going to come.
I putted my face by Meemaw’s folded in head. I whispered.
Meemaw! Poo!
She didn’t look up. Meemaw didn’t say anything. I whispered again.
Need a poo Meemaw!
But still Meemaw curled so I went on my own.
Pully light thing is broken off too high up for a reach so I leaved the door open. Light came in the crack. Not so scary and I sitted on the toilet. I waited. There was a great pain of squeeze of ow. Then it stopped.
Meemaw!
Not too loud because of Meemaw curled up and small. But she didn’t come. Instead another pain. I cried a little bit of crying. Then the door swinged more closed sudden! All by itself of perhaps a ghost! Dark came and swallowed me and the pain again. A great push of fear in the dark and still no Meemaw.
Meemaw!
Louder but still she didn’t come. I couldn’t get down because now now the poo was coming. It roared in my tummy roared out my bot with a sharpness and splash.
For a minute I waited. All was fizzy in my ears. My eyes trying to see shapes in the dark of the bathroom.
Meemaw I’m finished! Meemaw come!
Meemaw didn’t come. I slided off. There was some paper I wiped one time. I looked close in the dark to see of poo on the paper but I couldn’t see it. I thinked what if I look close get poo on my nose? I throwed it away the paper did two more wipes of new bits like Meemaw. Always new bits.
Pulled up my pants and trousers banged down the lid. Tried to flush. Handle so hard. Only little dribbles of water came not proper whoosh to carry off the poo. I gived up.
Quick as quick I did cold tap splished my hands in the water for germs. Then runned back into the light.
Still was Meemaw curled. I climbed in next to her putted my face close for a whisper.
I did it Meemaw.
She didn’t come out. Meemaw was still. I heared the little dryness of breath in out in out. I snuggled up closed my eyes sended in all of love to Meemaw in the curled up place.
But Meemaw stayed curled up and I getted off. I maked the dinosaurs go on on with the expedition. All my body feeled better better of a song inside of me even though Meemaw curled. So I singed all good words of Tale of a Tooth.
A hundred and twenty million years ago clever men clever men! One clue a tooth! One clue a tooth!
Spiney leaded them in the mission. It was all to the window. They lined up on the edge looked out at the world all darkened the street lights orange.
A van went by fast I couldn’t see of all the words just one. One word was glass and a picture like glass broken. Shot out into separate daggers.
I thinked of Karen in the hospital her spiky hair. I thinked all the night would come and she was far away far away and that was safe. But then I thinked of Meemaw and tortoise man and I knowed tomorrow we would go back again. Because Meemaw had said a yes. I thinked it meaned go back again.
When I looked round Meemaw was uncurled staring at the door. Her face closed no colour.
Meemaw can we go in the world tomorrow?
Meemaw didn’t say anything.
Meemaw can we go in the world not back to the hospital?
Meemaw didn’t say just sitted. I brought all the dinosaurs by her feet. The dinosaurs roared each one at a time to Meemaw. Then Spiney standed on the chair arm and speaked in his voice right to Meemaw. He doesn’t usually speak to Meemaw. But Spiney speaked.
I can battle the enemy and we can go in the world!
Meemaw waked up sudden. She looked at me all come back.
Are you hungry, Danny? Do you want some peanut butter toast?
Yes.
But she didn’t get up. Just stared at the door again a long time. I waited. Then Spiney speaked more.
You must not ever see Karen again you can go into the world!
Meemaw curled up again. I had done it wrong. I shaked Meemaw’s arm.
Can I have toast Meemaw? Meemaw!
Meemaw didn’t come out just a small voice all curled in.
Give me five minutes, Danny.
Five minutes is not long but this was long. I taked the dinosaurs back to their world and standed Apato on the volcano for a emergency. Rex and Spiney saved him. Then I was so hungry so so hungry.
Meemaw still curled and when I came close to her I knowed she was asleep. Meemaw asleep is special slow in out. I can snuzzle in her arm still the in out is the same. I shaked her arm. She didn’t wake up so I went to find the bread.
I taked the bread and climbed on the chair for getting the peanut butter. There was only a little bit in. I poked with a knife but ha
rd to catch. I getted just little scrappy bits. I wiped them on the bread but it teared in a hole. I gived up. Just eated it nothing on. I eated three pieces of floppy Hovis standing on the chair tall. I liked it standing tall.
Then I sitted on the side by the sink and runned the cold tap. Hard it came! Splash on my legs! Exciting! I drinked out of the tap whoosh! Water all across the floor to the carpet tiles. It maked dark splashes. I turned off the tap.
Then I pressed the kettle button in. It lighted up very bluey blue of space ships. I watched. It went clonk hubble. Then smoky as a swamp of the Jurassic era. Then click to off.
I waited a little while then did it again. I liked it the blue light. Then the smoky hot. It maked the doors of the high cupboards wet to dribbling. I rubbed the wetness with my finger it maked a grubby line. I did it lots lots. Then kettle wouldn’t press again. I getted down.
I taked four books into our bed that was still bed. It had stayed bed for many days now. I lied under the covers for reading the books.
I was reading Walking with Dinosaurs book of how the skeleton of a carnivore has impressive teeth. I stopped my voice but the words went on. The words went on in my head. Like mind words! The exact words of the page not maked up. I was doing reading in my head like Meemaw!
Meemaw!
Meemaw jumped to awake.
What?!
Meemaw I can read in my head! All silent in my head look!
I did it again. Meemaw couldn’t know it.
In my head Meemaw! I’m reading it all on in my head and it says the teeth and jaws of a carnivore… Oh no! Look I don’t have to say it out! Look Meemaw!
Meemaw laughed a little laugh. Not a joke for laughing!
No laughing! I can read in my head! I can read in my head!
I know! I know, I understand…
Meemaw getted out of the chair came to give a cuddle. I pushed her. Not a joke for laughing.
Meemaw looked at the clock.
Bloody hell, Danny! It’s nearly midnight! How long was I asleep?
She pulled down the blind went to by the sink.
What happened here?
She meaned the floor. The floor all wet of splashes
I getted a drink and spilled. I eated some bread for tea.
Tale of a Tooth Page 18
