She frowned at me and brought her hand up to my face again. “Ya’ need to fuck that temper out of ya,’ baby?”
Fuck yes! I fucking did. More than fucking ever!
My anger at Red’s deceit and insincere words suddenly spun through me like a tornado. Each of her loving words jumbling in my frazzled mind.
“Make love to me, Lucas. Right here, by the window, in front of the world. Let humanity see how much you love me and how much I love you.”
“I love you too, Lucas Hunt.”
“I’ll protect you from him Lucas, I can promise you that.”
Oh yeah Red, you did a great job of protecting me from Diablo, he still fucking won in the end.
He still controls your fucking heart.
Something finally snapped inside me and I yanked at Blondie’s hair and pulled her across the room towards the privates. William eyed me warily but Blondie put up her hand to tell him she was okay as she stumbled behind me up the stairs.
“Baby, calm down yeah? I’m here, ya’ can fuck me any which way you want but just lay off the hair, yeah?” she whimpered, which just riled me more.
“Shut the fuck up bitch” I raged as I pushed her into a room.
She stumbled forward and turned to face me as I stood in the doorway, my anger and rage and fury all surfacing at once as I glared at the whore who was ready and primed for me.
“Lucas . . .”
I closed my eyes as her soft voice filtered across the corridor and I shook my head in determination to rid her from my mind.
Rip her from my heart.
Tear her from my fucking soul.
She needed to be exorcised and I would be damned if it wasn’t with Blondie here.
I fought with my head and my heart, each of them pulling at the other.
I lifted my eyes at Blondie again who was now starting to look a little concerned over my wrath and I clenched my fists by my side, desperately trying to rein it in.
She would do Lucas. Hell, she had tits and a pussy, she would do, damn it.
FUCK!!!!
“Lucas . . .” It came again and I scrunched up my eyes, gulping down huge, horrendous lungful’s of air.
“No!” I told no-one in particular; just shouted it at the wall, shouted it at the door, shouted it at the air and shouted it at the bitch waiting for her pussy to be filled by any random.
“Go!” I barked at her.
She narrowed her eyes but pushed past me and fled down the passageway, back to the main bar.
I entered the room and slammed the door shut before I dropped to my knees.
I was going crazy.
I had gone crazy.
I had already gone crazy for a woman who would never offer me her complete heart.
It had never been hers to give me.
It had been Ryan’s
It had been Diablo’s
It had never been mine.
But I wanted it. I wanted it all.
I wanted her smile, her body, her soul, her spirit, her breath and above all, I wanted her pure heart.
“Lucas.”
I heard her and I knew she was there but I couldn’t look at her, desperate for her not to see me like this.
Broken, so fucking broken.
I squeezed my eyes closed as I felt her kneel before me and I hadn’t realised I was crying until she wiped at my cheeks with her soft fingers.
“Look at me, Lucas.” She whispered and I shook my head.
“Please” she begged softly and I swallowed harshly as I slowly opened my eyes.
My breath caught at her beauty, her warm and gentle smile fluttered around inside my chest, searching for my heart but I clamped it closed and held it back.
But God, she was so utterly beautiful and I had to fight hard to keep her out.
“Breathe, baby.” She urged as she took hold of my hand and held it tight in hers. “In . . .” she sucked in air and gestured for me to follow her.
I tried but it just stuck in my throat and made me gurgle.
“Again. In. . . .” she reiterated and I copied her, now desperately forcing air into my lungs as they clenched tightly at the hollowness.
She smiled and nodded “Out. . . .”
I obeyed and let it all back out before repeating and my head swam at the sudden rush. “Whoa” she chuckled as she grabbed hold of my biceps to stop me falling over.
My eyes lowered to her hands, her touch scorching my skin and inappropriately bringing my dick to life.
Why now? After been on the brink for over 2 weeks, why did it have to come to life now?
She dipped her face so she could look at me and I swallowed as her eyes expressed her deep pain but she smiled tenderly. “You okay now?”
I nodded as my mouth refused to form words.
Seriousness fell over her face and she diverted her gaze to the floor. “I’m sorry I hurt you, Lucas. I didn’t mean to, I . . . I . . .”
She hissed through her teeth as though her words physically hurt her and I remained still and silent. Waiting for her excuse and to tell me she still loved me.
“I don’t know what I can do to stop the hurt, Lucas. But the only thing I could tell you that would help, would be a lie. I don’t think you need a lie, you need the truth. It’s about time we both faced that; we both need to face it. But you need to be willing to listen, Lucas. I can’t tell you until you listen.”
These weren’t the words she should be saying to me. They should be ‘sorry’ and ‘I love you’ and ‘I never loved Diablo, it was a lie.’
But she didn’t say them, she refused to say them.
Because they weren’t true.
“I . . .” I swallowed the words back. They wouldn’t help right now; they would hurt us both even more and neither of us needed that.
She nodded sadly and leaned in; placing her soft lips on my cheek, lingering a little too long but I relished it. My nostrils took in her scent; my skin absorbed her softness and my soul, if only for a moment, merged with its mate.
She stood and ran her hand across my head as she left.
My soul was still fused with hers, and she took it with her. Ripped it right out of me and left with it.
I was in hell, I was sure. Someone had forced me down there without me knowing.
Trampled me under the soil and weeds and earth and compelled me to a life without Red.
That was the only explanation for it.
Hell.
Chapter 35
Layla
LUCAS DIDN’T COME into work for the next two weeks. Nate had informed me he had taken himself off to some sunny island somewhere and my heart broke a little more. But I accepted it, even though it hurt, and I understood.
His stand-in was an arsehole; no other words really, just an utter arsehole, who loved to hear the sound of his own voice and fancied himself as a high-flying playboy.
He was roughly 6ft 2,” slim, wayyyy too slim, Eugh; you could actually see his ribs through his shirt.
Shudder.
His blonde hair was swept to perfection; its slickness flawlessly styled and preened. His eyes were too close together and his nose was huge. I mean sometimes noses can look a little big, but his really was bloody ginormous. One of those you stared at whilst he spoke to you and no matter how much you tell yourself ‘Don’t be fucking rude, you’re staring’ you just can’t look away.
“Miss Summers” he purred from his office and the twelfth shudder of the day worked its way through my body.
I popped my head around his door and smiled sweetly. “Be a doll and grab me some lunch would you? Ham salad on white, double hazelnut latte and a caramel slice. Thanks, sweetie.”
I know I had stabbed a man to death before but this man deserved more, much more. A staple gun and red hot poker jumped into my mind and I sighed contently at the images I was creating. “Of course, Mr Travis. No problem, Sir.”
I grabbed my bag and went on the fourth lunch run of the week.
Just as the elevato
r doors opened I stumbled backwards at the person who was already in it.
“Todd.”
His smile was uncomfortable as he stepped out and we both stared at each other apprehensively.
“I, uhh, can we talk?”
“Oh. Sure, I was just going on a sandwich run but we can grab a coffee while . . .”
He nodded and smiled tightly.
The silence was really awkward as we descended the lift and as we walked across the foyer, Mason walked in.
He eyed Todd considerably and then turned to me. “Xbox night Willow, tonight. Don’t eat, Ava’s cooking.”
I nodded as he looked at Todd again and narrowed his eyes. “You Ry’s brother?”
How the hell did he know that?
Todd nodded and swallowed heavily as Mason stepped in close; the raw power he emanated made me shiver, never mind Todd. “You touch one more hair on her head and I’ll laugh in your butt ugly face while you go down. You understand?”
Okay.
Todd nodded as I stared at Mason.
He turned, kissed my cheek and made his way to the elevator. “8 O’clock, little Willow.”
We stood still as Todd regained his composure and I smiled apologetically at him, “I . . . uhh, he’s a good friend. But I don’t know how . . . ?”
He shook his head. “I deserved that I suppose.”
Oh.
We made our way across to the deli and purchased tea whilst they prepared my boss’s order.
Todd gestured to a small table and we sat, both of us sipping our drinks while he plucked up the courage to say what he needed to say.
Eventually he reached into his messenger bag and pulled out a large brown envelope and handed it to me.
“My Mum asked me to give you these. They’re . . . Ry’s stuff she knew he would want you to have.”
I couldn’t help it, I frowned in confusion and Todd gave me a sad smile.
“The funeral. I was angry and hurting and looking for someone to blame, and suddenly there you were. But that doesn’t condone what I did and I’m so very sorry, Kay.”
I nodded in understanding. I was always there when someone wanted to take a hit.
“Anyway,” he continued as he looked at me painfully “I just wanted to apologise really.”
He looked away, grief, anguish and devastation controlling his features and my heart went out to him. “He was my little bro, Kay. I loved him but, if I’m truthful, I hated you because you took him from me.”
I searched his eyes. Bitterness was there, but his anger was not, just resignation really and I gulped back my tears.
“I never stole him, Todd. He was always your brother, whatever I was to him. I’m not gonna lie to you, you hurt him when you refused to have anything to do with him but . . .”
It was my turn to look away now, frantically trying to control the threat of tears. “But . . . Ry would want me to explain something to you.”
He lifted his gaze and studied me intently, his eyes roaming over each of my facial features before they slipped down and perused my neck.
“This doesn’t excuse what happened and it doesn’t help either of us as to why Ry took the verdict for me . . .”
Todd looked up at me, the words he knew but had never heard before, encouraged his intent to sort things out between us.
He nodded firmly and I slipped my hand across the table and rested it over his “He took the verdict because I saved his life, twice.”
Todd’s eyes widened as he stared at me and I smiled softly.
“A year after we got married, Ry kind of went on a downhill slope. He got into drugs bad, real bad. Dunno why, just one of those things and he started sleeping with random’s, didn’t come home and then started building a killer drug debt to some deep shit men.”
A shiver racked through me at the memories, but it was over now and it needed to be said and thrown out in the open. “They were gonna kill him. They came to our house one night, guns hanging, knives wielded and pinned Ry to the floor.” I closed my eyes to the pain but Todd slipped his hand over mine and squeezed.
“They gave him a choice. Die or . . . or give up a night with the little wifey.”
Todd reared back a little and a whimper left his throat at my confession. “Oh Christ, Kay.”
I shook my head and smiled. “Ry, of course wouldn’t let them, he begged them to kill him there and then instead of make me go through that, but I just kinda zoned out, took hold of the gun and walked out with them. I loved your brother that much, Todd.”
He squeezed his eyes shut. “I was 17 Todd, 17. They were nice enough; didn’t take me horribly or anything but Ry never ever forgave himself for it and that’s what eventually broke our marriage down.”
He nodded and turned my hand over so he could thread his fingers through mine, both of us channelling our grief and support to each other.
“The second time was when he took the blame for Tony. Yes, I had got involved with a maniac and yes, Ry was protecting me. He punched Tony for battering me to within an inch of my life. Tony set on Ry, really bloody pummelled him and I knew he was gonna kill him so I . . . Well, you know the rest.”
“I’m sorry, Kay. I always knew how deep your love went for each other but I was a prick, still am really, but I’d really like for Ry’s benefit if we could . . . if we can well, keep in touch really?”
I nodded and smiled “I’d like that but not for Ry’s benefit, for ours. Family and all that, Todd.”
He grinned and nodded.
“I better get back before my boss starts eating his hair gel.”
He laughed and then pulled me into an awkward hug then bent and kissed my cheek. “I’ll be in touch.”
I nodded and watched his back retreat, feeling a small weight lift from my shoulders.
Now just Lucas and Sara to bear me down.
Sara was still acting utterly strange, her mood swings were volatile, she hadn’t seen Rob for weeks and all she did was sleep. I was really growing concerned for her but so far she had refused to talk and there was nothing I could do to help until she relented and opened up. But I was determined she would finally give in and tell me, even if it killed her.
Chapter 36
Lucas
I WAS PISSED again. For the fourth time since I had come back from Hawaii.
I thought the holiday would help me to move on but all I had done was see Red everywhere I looked on the bloody island.
She was on the beach, in the restaurants, in the bars and clubs and finally in my bed. My many wanks had been accompanied by Red. Her mouth around me, her under me blinking as I pushed into her, her tied and bound as I fucked her hard and rough and it was killing me.
The only way to push her out had been to get roaring drunk, slaughtered, absolutely and completely.
I pushed open the door to The Panther, determined to this time fuck a random bitch, even if it killed me.
My blurry eyes scanned the room and met Red’s immediately as she sat with Mason and Ava at the end of the bar.
Mason caught Red’s expression and twisted round to see me glaring at the beauty that refused to release me.
I stumbled up to the bar and grinned at Owen, “Whisky, neat.”
He nodded and poured my measure as Hilary from reception approached Mason. She leant into him and said something. He nodded and smiled then turned to Ava “Ready, baby?”
She clapped her hands excitedly and Mason laughed loudly then turned to Red. “You wanna join us, Red. Got the room to ourselves.”
She grinned wickedly. “You sure?”
He scowled at her “Yeah, of course. You’re just as intrigued as we are.”
She beamed widely at him.
What the fuck? Was she joining them for a threesome?
Fuck!
I watched them make their way up the stairs towards the rooms and I scowled when Red never turned around to look at me.
I tilted my chin to Owen. “Where are they off to?”
Owen just shrugged at me, unable to disclose any private information.
I shrugged back, downed my drink and followed them.
I reached the top of the stairs and scanned both ways before deciding to head left towards the playrooms.
Each room held a window and I peered in, taking in the many arses, tits and cunts as I proceeded. As I turned the corner I saw the back of Red moving through a door, giggling with Ava as she closed the door behind her.
No way, no bloody way was I standing back and letting this happen.
Enough.
I made my way quietly across the hall and gave it a few minutes before I slid down the handle and walked straight in.
“Oh.” Red stated and Mason narrowed his eyes on me. Ava’s were on Red, watching her reaction to me being there.
I scanned the room and frowned when all it held were a few large comfy chairs and a sofa.
What the hell was this room?
Then I spotted the large window on one wall and it all clicked into place. They had come to view ‘The God.’
Well fuck me.
I wasn’t missing out on this opportunity, so I made my way further into the room and settled into the chair beside Red.
“Would you like to join us, Lucas?” Mason asked and I grinned at him.
“Cheers, yeah.”
He snorted as Red huffed and I didn’t acknowledge to myself how much her bluster of annoyance got to me.
Ava giggled excitedly as the window exploded into life as The God, three women and a bloke entered and even I got excited at the sight of them, knowing this was gonna be better than watching one of my many porn DVD’s.
The action started immediately as God stood and two women dropped to their knees before him and unzipped him.
Good God, he was huge. Resting against the thigh huge, and I heard Red gasp slightly then shift in her seat as one woman took him in her mouth as far as she could, another woman wrapped her tongue around the remainder of his shaft.
Ava groaned a little and Red snorted. “If you two are gonna start humping, I’m outta here.”
Mason laughed then looked past Ava to her. “We’ll let you watch, little Willow. Ava has a thing about being watched.”
Red regarded them then shook her head in humour. “I don’t mind listening but please don’t make me watch.”
The NSC Boxset: Heart of Stone Page 143
